Clingers To the Edge of the Bed Club

Clingers-to-the-Edge-of-the-Bed Club

Here is how you do it. Pay attention. There is a test later.

1. At bedtime, let your dogs find a spot on the bed first. It will most likely be in YOURS.

2. After they settle down, crawl over them gently...you don't want to wake them. Haven't you ever heard the saying LET SLEEPING DOGS LIE? This is why is was written.

3. Now you have some choices. If you are married, you have fewer choices but you still have choices.

4. After you find a spot in which to sleep, the dogs will want to change their spot to...YOURS.

5. This is your chance to RUN back to your original spot and stake claim to it for the night.

6. The dogs will want to run to YOUR spot too, but you can taunt then by singing "Finders Keepers Losers Weepers". The more off key you sing, the more they will wag their tails, and the less they will think about running you off of the bed.

7. Now that you have a spot on the bed, DON'T GIVE IT UP. CLING TO THE EDGE OF THE BED WITH ALL YOU'VE GOT.

8. Keep a stuffed toy in your hand all night. In an emergency, you can throw it which will cause a fit of excitement and at least temporarily, the dogs will jump off of the bed to go after the toy.

9. If you have to get up in the night for any reason, refer back to rule 1.

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