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Ryan sighed heavily as he sat alone in his room. His parents had just told him about Noel's check up and then they had dropped a bomb shell on him. One of the colleges he had applied to, the one he wanted to get in the most, had called and left a message on the answering machine telling him that he had been accepted and that, since he had applied to start during summer session, his fist class was in four days.
It was good news, great in fact, he had dreamt of being accepted to UC-Davis since he was a freshman at Hawaii State, and to be accepted after taking a year off? That was phenomenal! He had forgotten about applying to Davis, since it had been shortly before Noel's accident, but now that he had been accepted to the best veterinary school in the country he couldn't say no and walk away from it.
" I've wanted to do this all of my life. What do I do? I can't just not go." He was beside himself with worry. For the past year he had been Noel's eyes, the one she talked to about everything. If he left who would she have left to talk to like that? Sure, he harasses her occasionally, okay, more than occasionally, but what were brothers for? He was still trying to decide what to do when he heard Noel's voice softly counting steps to his room. He sighed again. " I want to go, but can I leave her alone?"
" Ryan? Are you here?" Noel's voice called softly from the doorway where it was open just a crack. " Ry?"
" I'm here Nani." Ryan answered. " Can I talk to you?"
Noel pushed the door open and held her hand out, waiting for Ryan to grab it and guide her to his bed. " That's why I'm here. I want you to go and not to worry about me."
Ryan shook his head and directed her to an empty space on the bed. " But if I leave you what are you going to do? Mom and Dad aren't going to be here all the time to help you. And what about other people? Without someone here it'll be easier for them to find out. And how did you know?" Ryan asked, worried that she had heard the other half.
" The answering machine told me." Noel laughed. " You guys really have to learn to erase the messages you don't want me to hear." She reached her hand groping for his. He held his hand out to her and she found it and held it tightly. " I'm a big girl. You're going to have to let me go and do things on my own now. Besides, soon we won't have to worry about hiding my blindness."
His mind screamed " She knows!" at him.
" I've decided that I want to go to college. I can go to a college for the blind and get a teaching degree. Then I can go and teach at a blind school and that'll be the end of it." Noel smiled at him. " Besides, there aren't many guys who could love a blind girl…" The smile left her face. " Especially around here."
Ryan went and sat on the bed beside her, wrapping his arms around Noel in a bear hug. " That's not true Nani. There are plenty of guys who can love you. Give it time. You haven't met many people here yet, just wait a little and when the right guy comes along you'll know." He let go of her and kissed her forehead. " And he will come."
" But how will I know? I've never… I've never been in love." Noel sighed and a warm tear slipped down her cheek. " This is what I always swore wouldn't happen. I'd never want some guy's love… need it. And I don't even know who he is! I was supposed to be the first woman to surf the Fity year storm!" She brushed the tear away with a trembling hand. " I still have the money… and my board is in the attic. All I need now is my eyes back."
Ryan looked at his sister, his heart breaking. He remembered back to when they had been children, he was 15 and she had just turned 6…
Twelve Years Earlier…
" Ryan, can I sit on your surf board please?" the little girl asked.
The boy looked down at her with brotherly adoration. " How bout I take you for a little ride since it's your birthday? Would you like that?" He stooped to her level and brushed sand from one tan cheek.
The girl looked at him, her emerald eyes wide in awe. " Really? You'd let me ride your board?"
Ryan laughed, " Noelani, not ride it. I'll hold it and you can sit on it. You're too little to take a pass like me. Besides, it's too big for you to handle by yourself." He scooped the child up and tapped her nose. " But when your older I'll let you ride it, okay?"
The girl giggled. " Okay Ryan. But I want to ride it now!"
"And ride it you shall!" Ryan declared as he shifted her to his back and picked his surf board up.
Once they were in the water he put Noel on top of the board and swam out, pushing it ahead of him. Noel lay down flat out, not quite covering half the board
"Fifty-Year storm!" She brushed the tear away with a trembling Noel. They had reached the point where Ryan couldn't touch the sandy bottom anymore before he decided that it was time to turn back and head for shore.
"Okay Noel, time to go back." He had just finished turning the board to shore when a wave came and swamped them both.
He came to the surface sputtering, his grip on the surf board lost. "Noel! Noel, where are you?"
Ryan frantically searched the water for his little sister, his heart's worst fear seeming to be confirmed when he couldn't find her. Noel couldn't have drowned though, she swims like a fish! his thoughts raced. And just when he was ready to give her up for lost he heard giggling behind him, from the open sea where the waves were well over ten feet.
He turned around and was amazed to see his six year old sister surfing the monster waves almost professionally. "Noel! Get off that! Go to shore!" he yelled, suddenly frightened that she'd fall and be swept away by the strong undertow.
Noel just laughed and rode the wave into the shallows before twisting to a stop and sinking into the water. "See? I can surf just like you can!" She grinned ecstatically.
Ryan rushed through the waist deep water and scooped the child up in his arms. "Oh Noel, don't ever do that again! I was so scared, promise me!" He was delirious with relief now that he had her in his arms. "Oh please promise me you'll never do it again Nani!"
Noel hugged him back fiercely, her small arms tight around his neck. "I don't want to promise Ryan, I liked it. I want to surf when I'm a big girl!"
"I don't know if Dad will go for that Nani. Do you think he'd like his baby girl surf waves like you did today? Those things were bigger than three of you would be!" Ryan put her down and laughed. "But we can tell him if you want."
"Oh I want to Ryan! I want to!" Noel cried enthusiastically. "He'll be so happy!" Her joy was evident as her eyes sparkled brightly. "And why are you calling me 'nani'?"
Ryan knelt down to her level. "I'm calling you 'nani' because you were so beautiful out there Noel. You looked like you belonged." He raised a hand to her face and pushed a strand of wet hair behind her ear. 'Maybe if we show Dad he'll see how good you could be, how good you are. And then maybe he'd let you surf when you're older."
"Don't bother." A voice boomed from behind them.
Ryan nearly jumped out of his skin but, after quickly recovering his composure, turned to face his father. "Dad," he began but stopped at the look on his father's face. It was of pure wonder.
"She's good, isn't she?" he asked, his voice full of pride.
Ryan nodded tentatively smiling. He was surprised, he had expected trouble. But apparently Ryan hadn't been the only one watching Noel knowing how good she was.
It wasn't any secret that Ryan surfed for fun only, and that he devoted much of his time to his one true passion in life: animals. But to have a surfer in the family, one who did it for fun, and competitively, and was good at it, it was his father's dream since he himself couldn't surf due to a back problem.
" Dad, I'm sorry I let her get away from me." Ryan said. He tensed, still expecting to be punished. He was still trying to recover from the thought that Noel could have drowned, and very well may have had it not been for his board.
"Don't worry son." Jake said evenly, no hint of anger in his voice. "I watched the whole thing, it wasn't your fault." He gazed at Noel, joy shining in his eyes. "She could be the first woman to surf the Fifty-Year, you know?"
Noel gazed right back at her dad, her own happiness evident. "Of course Daddy! I wanna be a surfer just like you were."
Twelve Years Later
Ryan shook himself out of his reminiscing. That was a life time ago, just like Noel's surfing was. Forever out of reach if she couldn't see, forever unattainable because of a stupid accident. No more championships easily won, no more happy days spent out on the water catching a few rips, no more of it ever.
"Please don't cry Nani, I can't stand to see you cry. How about we go to the beach? Just you and me and I'll help you ride one?" He made a few quick decisions before speaking again. "I'll wait and go the day before classes start. I'll just get a flight that day instead and we can go spend tomorrow at the beach, okay?"
Noel looked at him, or tried to at least, smiling through her tears. "I love you so much Ryan. You're the best brother in the world. We may not ride any, but it'll be fun to spend that last bit of time together." She threw her arms around his neck, knowing where to put them thanks to his cologne, and squeezed.
"Anything for you my beautiful one, my angel sister." He pulled back from her hug and stared at her deep green eyes, still beautiful as they were before her sight was taken. "I love you Noelani, and I will always be here for you. And when the angels who gave you to us decide it's time for you to go back to Heaven, I'll watch as they make you one of them."
Noel felt another tear slide down her cheek because of Ryan's poetic words, so obviously filled with the love he held for her. "Oh Ryan, I love you. I'm so glad you're my brother, I love you Ry."
Brother and sister embraced again, and for a few moments, Noel forgot she was blind.
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