Well I hope you all had as merry a Yaksmass as ole CHIM CHIM did!!!
And I hope you all found as cool a movie under your tree as CHIM did!!!
Yes, Santa Claws was good to Chim this year, dispite all of Chim's naughtiness, and brought him arguably the coolest movie of all:

WILD ZERO





This movie has everything that you could possibly imagine that is cool, all wrapped up in one video. It has Zombies and gore (some awesome headshots), guns (lots of guns), motorcycles, fast cars, armed robbery, drinking, UFO's (lots of UFOs), Rock N Roll (Guitar Wolf are among the main characters), an awesome soundtrack (see the aformentioned Guitar Wolf), hot Asian girls (and a hermaphrodite too), Love, Violence, action and the list goes on and on.......

So where to start?!?!
Well there is this guy named Ace.

And he's a Rock N Roller and big fan of Guitar Wolf. So he's at this show and decides to meet Guitar Wolf and wanders in on a stand off between Guitar Wolf and 'The Captain' who manages the club. The Captain has forsaken Rock N Roll for the money and says ROck N Roll is dead. Well that's enough for Ace.....

Ace let's his feelings on Rock N Roll be known, and gets a knockout punch and precipitates a quick gunfight which leaves one goon with his head shot off and a the Captain's fingers shot off.

Because of his devotion to Rock N Roll, Guitar Wolf makes Ace his bloodbrother and gives him a whistle to blow if he is ever in danger.

Later on Ace gets into more danger than you can shake a stick at when there is a UFO invasion and a Zombie uprising.

Without giving to much away, Guitar WOlf comes to the rescue, teaming up with a couple wanna-be stick-up artists and a mecenary arms dealer who hates it when Zombies interupt her shower.

All the while, the Captain, armed to the teeth, follows along to enact his vengence...

The action is near non stop as Ace learns the true meaning of
Rock N Roll and Guitar Wolf (and Bass Wolf and Drum Wolf too) with their Rock N Roll powers

and the others battle both the Zombies and the Captain. It's almost too cool for words!!!

Maybe you should just check out the:

TRAILER

And click HERE for the official WILD ZERO site!!!

And so you are saying, "CHIM sounds like you had an excellent Yaksmass day watching WILD ZERO, what's next?"

Well watching WILD ZERO again on New Years Eve and playing this excellent WILD ZERO DRINKING GAME!!!

So if you only ever see one movie in 2003, make sure it is this one!!!!!!

Oh yeah, where do you get it???

There lies the rub...I've heard SYNAPSE FILMS is releasing it on DVD here in North America early this year, but they are taking their sweet time about it and I hear they are cancelling auctions on Ebay for VCD versions of it to hedge their bets on sale (although they suspiciouly let this sellers VHS auctions go). If you have a Region 2 DVD player or for VHS , try CD JAPAN.
Mine came from my girlfriend, who bought it from Seven Gateways Video, however I wouldn't recommend getting your copy there. Even though the quality level says 8/10 on this dudes site. I'd give my copy about a 4 or 5. He, as of yet, has not responded to my email, but needless to say, I'm NOT AT ALL IMPRESSED!!!! But as the redneck locals say around here, "even stinky pussy is better than NO pussy" and so a crappy copy of WILD ZERO is better than NO copy at all!!!!

UPDATE: Everything has a happy ending!!! CHIM aquired a DVD copy from Rapid Eye Movies, Chim's girlfirend gets a refund from Seven Gateways Video, and the only thing that could be cooler is if I could find the SOUNDTRACK somewhere!!

And now, finally, there is a version availible in North America: