Dear Dr. Holmes:

Kung may nakasiping akong 6 na babae sa loob ng isang taon (continuous ng STD and alternate) may posibilidad ba na makakuha ako ng sakit o makadeveloped? Kahit na lahat sila ay walang sakit. (If I slept with 6 women in the course of a year and if none of them have any STDs of any kind, is it possible that I could develop any STD myself?) I know this is a stupid question and I can use my common sense but, is it possible?

Thank you and more power!

JAIME

Dear JAIME:

Not a stupid question at all...and one that definitely needs asking.

The answer is no. As long as all your sexual partners have been STD-free, you will not get any STD from them, whether you sleep with one, two, or ten women in one year.

That is the reason telling people to avoid anal sex so as to avoid HIV is ridiculous.

If a person is not HIV positive, one can do anything with, to, by that person, anal sex included and one would still be HIV-free and, hopefully, also sated and contented. Anal sex does not "cause" AIDS. Never has, never will.

If, however, a person is HIV-positive, then it is a very good idea to avoid anal sex with him (or to wear a condom when trying it...but even then one has to be extremely careful) since the chances of tears in the tiny blood vessels and thus more efficient fluid exchange is much more with anal, rather than say, vaginal sex.

But I digress.

You want to know your chances of getting STD from the women you've slept with if none of them have any STD at all. The chances of getting STD from an STD-free person is nil.

This is presuming, of course, that the person is really and truly STD-free and hasn't merely lied to you about her status. It is possible, also, that she hasn't willfully lied but just doesn't know her STD status herself.

This is also no guarantee that you couldn't get STD non-sexually. For Example; becoming HIV-positive not through sex, but through the exchange of contaminated needles.

Good luck and I hope this answers your questions.

MG Holmes

Dear Dr. Holmes,

I hope you can spare some of your time with my queries.

I am always planning to see an OB-GYN for months now but I am afraid and having second thoughts about whether it is really necessary . My boyfriend for 5 years and I have been "going out" for 3 years now (once a month). These past few days I've been noticing some brown spots on my underwear which made me conclude that it is all dirt. Is it really necessary for me to undergo pop smear like what my friend is advising me, or Lactacyd will already do? I am really that dirty?

I hope to receive an advice from you.

Thank you and more power.

GINA

Dear GINA:

Brown spots on your underwear don't mean you are dirty, either literally or figuratively. It could mean dried blood or something else and the only way you can find out is by going to a physician, preferably an OB-GYN.

It is important that you go see a physician for a check up not because you have been sleeping with your boyfriend, not even because you have brown spots on your underwear but because you are a woman and all women past a certain age (I forget what age, but definitely by 18) should go for a complete physical. While there and depending on what the results of your physical are, your doctor will tell you when you should come back for another visit and it would be a good idea to keep that next appointment too.

I realize it can be a little bit frightening to go to a doctor and to share personal information that is, well, personal. But doctors are there to help you and many of them have been trained to be sensitive to the needs and concerns of their clients (including the apprehension of a first-time visit). With any luck, you will get a doctor who is not only competent, but also sensitive and really concerned. In case you don't, then you can always change doctors if you want to (and have the time, energy and money to do so). If not, and you have to "suffer" in the hands of a rather callous doctor (alas, there aren't many of those around, but that's minor consolation if you happen to be with one of them), just set your priorities in order:

Even in the worst-case scenario that your doctor may be non-responsive to every nuance of your being, you will, at least, have the necessary information to make informed decisions about your body.

All the best

MG Holmes

(BodyMind Vol. 1 No. 7 - First posted: 12-7-97)

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