Chapter 15
"Jessa, being a warrior, and being a hero, are not necessarily two separate things."
Holding hands, Hercules and Jessa were strolling down the shaded path of a forest trail. The sunlight that filtered through the trees made merry, dancing patterns on the ground as the breeze stirred their leaves.
Jessa reached out and caught a leaf as it fluttered its erratic way to the ground. She watched it twirl as she rolled the stem between her fingers.
"But warriors fight for a living – they spend all their lives killing other people – heroes aren’t supposed to do that – they’re supposed to save lives, not take them."
"Jessa, warriors save lives, as well a take them – and heroes take lives, as well as save them."
Jessa looked up at him, her brow furrowed with perplexity.
"Then how do you know which is which?"
Hercules thought on that for a moment.
"I suppose it’s motive," he replied at last.
"You mean good verses bad?"
"Yes."
"Isn’t that saying then that, since heroes fight for just causes, then they are good – and warriors then must be the bad ones?"
"No. Warriors fight for just causes as well."
"You can’t be suggesting that all warriors fight for just causes."
"Of course not. Perhaps I should have said warriors can fight for just causes as well."
"So, there are good warriors, and bad warriors."
"Yes, although I suppose it would probably be more accurate to call the bad ones outlaws, rather than warriors."
"Does that mean that there can also be bad heroes as well as good heroes?"
"No, a hero, by definition, fights for just causes. Otherwise, he’d be a villain, not a hero."
"Just, by whose standards?"
Hercules stopped and turned to face Jessa.
"What do you mean?"
"For instance," Jessa explained, "A town is dying of thirst while the one well that still gives water is held by a man who refuses to share it. The village pleads to you for help. Would you kill him?"
"No. I would try to convince him to allow the others to use the water from his well."
"And if he refuses? If he gives you no other choice?"
"Given no other choice, then I suppose I would – if there were no other way. Killing should always be a last resort."
"But if you did have to kill him, you would do it because you consider the cause just?"
"Yes, I would say it is. It was cruel to keep all of the water to himself and allow the others to die of thirst."
"Then by the village’s standards, and yours, the cause was just?"
"Yes."
"But is it just by the standards of the wife and children who must now struggle on without a husband and father?"
"You didn’t say anything about a wife and children."
"Do you ask every person if they have a spouse and children before you kill them?"
"Jessa, it’s impossible to know every detail of every situation. You can only try to make the best decision you can based on what you know – and hope that you’ve made… the… right…" His voice trailed off as he made the connection with the argument he and Jessa had had weeks ago about her being a warlord.
"Exactly," she said.
Hercules’ expression turned troubled.
"So," Jessa pressed, "Good or bad – warrior or outlaw – hero or villain – how do you know which is which? I believe we just talked ourselves in a circle back to where we started."
Hercules took both of Jessa’s hands in his and looked at her, his expression candid.
"The only way that question can really be answered is by the one asking it – they have to judge by their own standards."
"But what about…"
"Jessa," Hercules interrupted, "Good or bad – you can never answer that question and satisfy everyone – you must decide by what your heart tells you. As for hero or villain – warrior or outlaw – that is for others to determine I suppose. As you suggested, I guess it does depends on your point of view."
"That’s just what Ares said."
"What?" Hercules asked in surprise.
"He said, ‘No matter which side of a battle you’re on, the other side is always the enemy. Each side thinks they’re the good guys and the others are the bad guys. It’s just a matter of perspective.’"
Hercules looked at her for a long moment. Then he released her hands and walked a few steps away – one hand was on his hip and the other he ran through his hair.
"I… I don’t know what to say in response to that."
They both just stood in silence.
"NOOoooo! Gods above help us!"
Hercules was jerked out of his introspection by the shouts and screams. He and Jessa did not hesitate.
As they topped a rise in the trail they paused. Two women were huddled with several children under a cart, while three men were being beaten by a motley-crew band of five attackers.
Jessa looked at Hercules.
"Warriors or outlaws?" she asked grinning.
"Definitely outlaws!"
Jessa charged.
"Hey! Wait for me!" Hercules called.
The armed men whirled in surprise as Jessa smashed into their midst screaming her battle-call. She hit the first one in the chest with both feet, sending him flying into the cart of produce. He started to get back up again, but his eyes suddenly crossed and he fell over backwards – his head capped with a melon-half and his shirt a salad bar.
Jessa already had another in a chokehold. One of the other attackers screamed and charged her – and got a mouth full of boot for his trouble. He staggered back, spitting teeth and blood. Jessa released her chokehold on the blue-faced one and introduced her fist to his face – he was out before he hit the ground.
The tardy Hercules finally arrived on the scene. Grinning from ear-to-ear, Jessa pushed him back.
"Stand back sir – this is a job for a hero!"
A gape-mouthed Hercules stood back.
Jessa grabbed the still-staggering tooth-less one, and shoved him into Hercules arms.
"Hold this for me, won’t you dear?"
"Uh, of course, sweetheart," said a bemused Hercules.
The two as-yet-unscathed attackers, attacked. They circled Jessa grinning and waving their swords.
"Wait a minute!" Jessa cried, "This isn’t fair!"
They just laughed. Hercules was beginning to get a little apprehensive.
"Uh, Jessa…" he said.
"Don’t worry, I’m going to even the odds!"
She drew her sword.
The two men laughed again.
"It’s still two against one!" one of them said.
Jessa looked from her one sword, to their two swords – her brow creased with consternation.
"You’re right – it still isn’t fair."
She threw down her sword.
"This is much better!" she said grinning from ear-to-ear once again.
The two swordsmen exchanged befuddled looks.
Abruptly, Jessa screamed in the face of one very puzzled outlaw – and snatched the sword right out of his shock-frozen hand.
"Thank you," she said politely. He just stared at her – so she smacked him in the face with the flat of his own sword.
"You forgot to say ‘You’re welcome’," she reprimanded him as he fell dazed to his knees. She kicked him in the butt – causing him to crack his head on the wheel of the cart. He fell facedown into the dust.
"Some people have no manners," she remarked. She threw his sword on his unconscious body.
"Uh, Jessa – this one’s coming around," Hercules informed her.
"Please excuse me," Jessa politely said to the last swordsman, "I won’t be but a minute."
She walked up to the man that Hercules had been holding for her. He was still shaking his head to clear it, but he was now able to retain his feet with only a little help from Hercules.
Jessa lifted his chin up with one hand.
"Do you still feel a little dizzy?" Jessa asked solicitously.
He nodded his head.
"Maybe you should lay down and take a little nap – would that help?"
He nodded again.
Jessa cracked skulls with him. He lay down – in a disheveled heap, perhaps – but he did lie down.
"Thank you for holding him for me, sugar-buns," Jessa said to Hercules.
"No problem, cupcake," he replied, still a bit dazed.
Jessa turned and faced the last attacker. She gave him a wicked leer.
"Your turn!" she sang.
He gulped. Looking around for an escape route, he began backing up.
"Oh, don’t leave yet!" Jessa cried, "We haven’t had a chance to play!"
Suddenly he lunged – not for Jessa – but for the cart.
There was a chorus of screams as he dived under the cart amongst the women and children. He rolled out to the other side and stood up. He did not run – he stood his ground – with a nasty sneer on his face.
Jessa looked at him, puzzled. She started to circle the cart towards him.
One of the women screamed.
"Gods above, save my baby!"
The outlaw held one of the children – a girl of about five or six – with his sword blade to her neck.
"Jessa!" Hercules cried in alarm. He started to move towards them.
"Stay back!" the outlaw warned them, "I can slit this brat’s throat before you can even get near me!"
Jessa and Hercules froze.
"It’s okay," Jessa assured him holding her empty hands out in placation, "Look, I’ll let you go – just don’t hurt her."
The man began backing up, dragging the crying child with him.
"Let her go!" Jessa repeated, "I said I’d let you go!"
"No!" the man snarled, "She’s my insurance!"
He picked the little girl up under one arm and ran for the cover of some trees.
Jessa started to go after him.
"No, Jessa!" Hercules cautioned.
The outlaw had stopped at the edge of the trees and turned around.
He grinned at them in triumph.
"Guess I don’t need my ‘insurance’ any more," he said. He threw the child down to the ground.
"Nite, nite, little baby!" he said sweetly. He raised his sword.
"NO!" Hercules howled.
The child’s mother screamed.
There was a high-pitched whistling, sizzling noise.
The outlaw jerked back – three times. He wavered a moment, and then slowly toppled over – like a felled tree.
Everyone converged on him. The child’s mother swept the little girl up into her arms weeping in relief.
The outlaw was dead. He had a dagger piercing his eye, his jugular, and his heart.
Jessa looked down at him dispassionately.
"Hmm, guess outlaws are not quite as tough as godlings." She withdrew the knives and wiped them clean on the dead man’s clothes.
Hercules was staring at her.
"I didn’t know you could do that." Then he looked back to where the rest of the luckless outlaws were. "Or that."
Jessa just gave him a crooked smile. (She would have said, "I have many skills", if that line weren’t already spoken for. Big grin to fellow Xena fans.)
"You didn’t think I carried a sword and a dozen throwing knives just because they accessorized nicely with my clothes, did you?"
"No… I mean… I know you had them, it was just… I never saw you use them."
"Haven’t needed to till now," Jessa shrugged.
"Uh – yeah, I guess." Hercules looked back at the cart again.
"Wow." He looked at Jessa again.
"Welcome to the ‘hero’ business," he said.
Jessa laughed and threw herself into his arms. She gave him a big kiss.
Her mood didn’t last though – her expression turned dark as she looked at the crying child and mother.
"Tartarus-be-damned outlaws!" she spat. She stalked furiously back to the cart where the other four men were lying, still unconscious.
She grabbed the hair of one of them, raised his head – and slit his throat. She slit the throat of a second. She grabbed the hair of a third. Suddenly, she was jerked around so forcefully that she nearly fell.
"Jessa! What do you think you’re doing!"
She stared at Hercules’ shocked face in incomprehension.
"What?"
"Why did you do that!"
She still didn’t understand.
"Do what?"
"Jessa! You just killed those two men in cold blood! For pities sake they weren’t even conscious!"
"Hercules! They’re outlaws remember? They’re the bad guys!"
"That doesn’t mean you have to slaughter them like animals!"
"But they are animals! ’ Jessa said angrily. "Damn it Hercules – that one was going to slaughter that innocent child like an animal – the others would probably have done the same, given the chance!"
"You don’t know that!"
"So what! Look at them! They’re all probably career-criminals! If we let them go, who’s going to save the next batch of their victims! Never suffer an enemy to live!"
"What!" Hercules exclaimed in disbelief, "Where did you learn that!"
Jessa just lifted her chin defiantly.
Hercules stared at her.
"Of course – Ares."
"I happen to agree with him on this point," Jessa told him coldly.
"Jessa – you can’t just go around killing everyone that looks at you cross-eyed! Bad people have been known to turn their lives around!"
"Are you willing to gamble the lives of these outlaws’ future victims, on the chance that they will ‘turn around’? I’m not."
"Jessa, that’s not right!"
"By whose standards? You said we all have to decide ‘good’ and ‘bad’ by our own standards. By my standards, these are bad men – so they must die."
"No! I’ll agree with you that they are bad, but that does not give you the right to murder them!"
"Point of view."
"What?" Hercules said, taken off-guard.
"Point of view. By your point of view, they were murdered – by mine, they were executed."
"Jessa, you’re twisting my words! Cutting these men’s throats is murder!"
"Execution."
Hercules looked at her, shaking his head in disbelief.
"Oh, Jessa – what a job he has done on you."
Jessa’s eyes flared up in anger.
"So! Good or bad? Hero or villain? Which do you judge me to be now? Or do I even need to ask!"
She turned away from him sharply and, snatching up her sword, she left the forest trail and stalked off into the trees.
"Jessa! Where are you going!"
She whirled around in fury and pointed her sword at him.
"Straight to Tartarus, according to you!" she shouted angrily. She turned again and continued her flight into the forest.
"Wait Jessa! We need to talk about this!" Hercules was following her.
She whirled around again. "No! Just leave me be! Heroes and villains don’t mix! Just leave me be!" She was screaming by the time she finished.
"Jessa, please!" Hercules implored as he continued to follow her.
"NO! The way I feel right now – I want to run you through with my sword!"
Jessa turned and ran.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
She lay on the forest floor weeping, her head buried in her arms.
A hand touched her shoulder.
"Jessa."
"No!" She pushed it away.
"Oh, Jessa – what a job he has done on you."
"Go away!"
"Jessa," he said gently, "You have to know by now that you can never be what he wants you to be. You don’t really want to be like him, do you?"
"I don’t know anymore – I don’t know anything anymore!"
He stroked her hair.
"Jessa," he said softly.
She threw herself into his comforting arms.
"Oh, Ares!"
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