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On Wednesday, I was standing in line at the
Sweet Shop. While I waited, I listened to this girl whine and
complain about how bad registration had been for her in the past.
As a freshman, she had to go last. Then the
system changed and she had to go last the next year again. As
a junior she once again went last. She explained to her friends
and to anyone in earshot that she wasn't taking it anymore. If
she didn't get the classes she wanted this year, she was going
to do this and she was going to do that. So world, you had better
look out.
I'm not going to go off about the registration
system. I know that there are problems. I know that there are
problems as does every single student, faculty, staff, and administration
member. It has problems now; it had problems twenty years ago,
and it will still have problems twenty years from now. With that
said, I have the perfect cure for registration and upcoming finals
week-Chill Out!
Spring is here! Go outside and enjoy the sun,
the cool breeze, and the girls sunbathing topless in front of
Gilbert Hall. Everyone is wound up so tight they couldn't get
a greased BB up you-know-where.
The Wildman has a few suggestions on how to
chill out before finals:
u
Hunt a small furry animal using only your Riverside version of
Shakespeare book (See Diagram 1.1 for an explanation)
u
See event listings in The Snapper section.
u
Take long treks across the rolling hills of Southeastern Pennsylvania
u
Lay around in your tighty-whities on the couch eating potato
chips
u
Peel labels off Bud bottles
u
Don't go to class
u
Download porn off the web
u
Get sunburned
u
Watch The Three Stooges
u
Toss playing cards into a hat
u
Watch people on Friday and laugh as they try to register
u
Tip cows
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Fold The Snapper into a huge paper airplane
I think you get the idea. The countdown for
the end of the semester has started and everybody needs to be
in their best disposition for the summer months so that they
can do some serious partying.
So from one Wildman to another-Chill Out.
Remember, you can probably get the class you couldn't get now
during drop/add at the start of next semester. Lots of the people
who thought they needed the class this semester will probably
drop it then. As for finals, who cares? Take this Wildman's word
of advice: find classes that don't given finals. It's working
for me.
Besides, finals don't matter that much. You
can always take the class over next semester.
Registration is not the end of the world;
it's not the seventh seal of the apocalypse; and it's not even
that big of a deal. So Chill Out, enjoy the remaining
few weeks you have left, and don't get all bent out of shape
because you didn't get the class you need, that you have a bulletin
board to make, or four finals on the same day. Life will still
go on. The soul is a hard thing to kill-even with a chain saw.
As for that girl who was complaining about
registration, I wish you the best of luck, honey. But Chill
Out, it's not that big of a deal.
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