obsessions

10. The unhealthy desire to wear more championship rings than we have fingers. We will never be like Mike - no matter how many pairs of his shoes we own.

9.The unhealthy desire for our stuffed animals to be more than just stuffed animals. Pooh bear is just a toy - and not like that.

8.The unhealthy obsession with the pool tables at work. No matter how many of our laundry quarters we spend in those things we will never be as good as Matt, Jason, or that other guy that brings his own que stick (is that what its called?). Although sometimes we may get lucky and beat one of them - it is not hope - it is a waste of quarters that could be put to use on the BAGS of laundry building up in the house.

7. The unhealthy desire to look at Victoria's Secret Catalogs to (1) google at the models (2) wish we looked that good in our Wal- mart underwear and (3) wish we could afford that 15 billion dollar bra they sell at Christmas. It is best to realize that (1) they're MODELS (2) it'll NEVER happen and (3) it'll NEVER happen.

6. The unhealthy desire for our apartment to ever be completely clean at any milisecond in time. There is always a dish or a piece of laundry or a kitchen full of dishes or seven bags of laundry and no matter how hard we try there will always be AT LEAST one room in the house DIRTY and even though thats BAD thats life. Deal.

5.The unhealthy desire for exam week to go by without having at least one mental breakdown....what do you mean its not open notes - 250 questions on material that I haven't thought about since day 3 which was like 3 months ago? Are you insane?

4. The unhealthy desire for there to be 26 hours in a day. What do you mean it's Thursday night. I've only slept 6 hours since Monday and I still haven't found any time for the term paper due TOMORROW!

3. The unhealthy desire that one day prince (or princess) charming will ever come wisk you off your feet. First of all, how many people do you know that still ride horses? Secondly, think abou their size proportionally to yours... Wisk, no i don't think so - maybe drag accidently if your body gets mysteriously entangled in the poor horses legs.

2. The unhealthy desire to believe that we only have 10 of these crazy obsessions!

1. The unhealthy desire that on that lovely first day of 2002 anything will be different. That any of our obsessions will fade. That any of our habits will diminish. That anything will be any better than it was the night before. It won't. But hey... It is what it is!