Hannah Mae Krahn's Guestbook
March 23, 1999
Baby Hannah,
You were only with us for such a short time, but I still loved you so much. I remember when I was babysitting you and Chloe, I didn't even want to put you down. And I was sitting in the chair downstairs feeding you and I was thinking, when I have my babies, I want them to look just like you. You were such a beautiful little girl. And you were such a good baby. I do not understand why you died, there seems no reasonable explanation. You were just a tiny, sweet little baby and you of all people, should not have left us. I was so proud of you, I showed everyone my pictures of you and bragged about how adorable you were. I regret so much that I didn't get one last chance to hold you, like everyone else did. And I regret that I made the choices I did that made me not see you as much as I would have liked to. I couldn't believe it when I heard what happened, I never ever expected it to be you. It is so unfair. The only good I see is that you could not have known, like older people. You could not have been scared, just peacefully went, so I pray to God that you felt no pain. You never have to live in this world, and have all the hurt that everyone goes through. But that is not fair for me to say that, you deserved to live a long life, you deserved to do the things everyone does. You never got a chance to do so many things. You never said your first word, or sat up or crawled or walked. You never got to experience love and get married and have kids of your own. I only hope that you are happy now in Heaven, like you were here. I told you lots about Justin, even though you couldn't understand, but you were the best listener I knew And when I found out what happened, I saw you with him. I saw him holding you, and it was so clear. You know Justin wanted to see you when you were born, but he missed you by only 10 days. Now he does get to see you, but we don't. That same night I had a dream about you two too. You were laying in your crib, and you were so tiny and so cute, your crib was in all these clouds and I could see everything that happened. Justin walked over and looked into your crib, and with his little smile that he had, he said, "so you're Rhiannon's baby sister huh?" and you looked up at him and smiled and he said "ya, I could tell, she told me how cute you were." And he picked you up and was rocking you and feeding you, and you two looked happy. And that really helped me. So little baby Hannah, I hope you know and see that I talk about you almost everyday and even though I only was with you a short while, I love you so much, like you've been here my whole life. And please watch over and take care of dad, cuz he may not think so because of the things I do and the way I am, that I love him, but I do. And take care of Chloe to, I know she must miss you so much. She is only a little girl herself, she can not understand everything, but she knows that you are gone, and I know that she loved you just as much as me and the rest of us. And take care of your mommy too, and everyone else. I want to thank you too I guess for many things. First because you were such a good baby with me, I remember on Christmas, you were crabby when everyone was holding you, except for me, I got you to sleep and I held you the whole time I was there. And second of all, at your funeral, that was the first time I ever remember hugging dad. For a while at least, you brought us closer together, I just wish it wouldn't have had to happen because you left us. I guess I should end this, I just wanted to let you and everyone else know, that even though I am not doing what they think is the best and they think I don't care about anything, I do, I care about you, and Chloe and Britt and Kayla and dad and my mom even too and lots more. So little, precious baby Hannah, you will never ever be forgotten by me, I love you with all my heart, and I hope to see you again one day soon.
Love forever,
Your sister,
Rhiannon
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March 27, 1999
Too soon a precious little one has been taken. My thoughts and my sincerest sympathies are with you and your family. My little granddaughter also died of SIDS at the early age of 47 days old. It seems so unfair that they have not been able to be with us and learn to crawl, walk, and run. I think of our beautiful Sabreena Maree Grapevine every day. I am ever thankful for these memorials that help us to keep our memories of our loved ones with us forever.
Sincerely,
Gramma Catherine ^i^ |
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March 28, 1999
Dear Baby Hannah,
I have felt so bad for the past three days. All I can think is that you did not deserve to die. I don't remember who I told this to, but it is all I can think of. Of all the things I have done, of all the people I have hurt and done things too, I should have been the one, not you. I keep thinking that Dad thinks it should have been me also. And baby, if I could change it, I would. I have lived my life, I have done the things that I need to do, and so much that I shouldn't have done, and I know that it should have been me, not you. I can only apologize that it happened that way, I wish it wouldn't have, but I cannot change it, you know if I could, I would. So please baby Hannah, forgive me for all I am doing and know that I love you with all that I can love, you will never be forgotten,
Love always,
Rhiannon |
 |  | April 25, 1999
May God Bless you and comfort you for the loss of your sister, Hannah.
Tammy |
| April 28, 1999
Hi Little Girl,
Everyone should be happy to know that I am coming home tomorrow. I hope at least that they are happy that I am coming home. I want to straighten everything out so I CAN do what I want and not have to worry about being caught up. I want to straighten things out so I can spend time with the ones that I love. I want to be a good sister again. Somehow make it up to you. If Dad and your mom have another baby, do not ever think that that baby will replace you baby Hannah. In a way I hope they do, I want to have a sister or brother that I can be good to and they will look up to me and I won't ever have to leave them. I will be so scared though. What if we lost that one two? I don't think any of us could take that. I know I for sure couldn't. I'm surprised I'm still going. Well, I just wanted to write you a little letter letting you know I was thinking of you. I miss you baby sister. You would be sitting up and learning so much now. You were such a smart little girl. How I wish I could have seen you grow up. You would have been the most beautiful girl. I hope so much in a way that my baby girls look like you. They would be so adorable and sweet. But it would hurt to see and be reminded. But in a way it would be good, to be reminded of you. I know what I am naming my babies. If I have a boy I am naming him Justin Lee, of course for Justin. And if I have a girl, she will be Sydney Hannah. I have a cousin named Sydney, but Kathy said that doesn't matter, I should name mine that anyway, I had the name first. Anyway, off track again. I miss you growing up and I miss you just how you were, I love you my baby sister, I will see you when I get there.
Love until forever,
Your big sister,
Rhiannon |
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May 3, 1999
Dear Rhiannon,
You have suffered more pain in a few short months than anyone should have in a lifetime. Our thoughts are with you. Thank you for loving Justin so much.
Justin's Aunt Judi |
May 10, 1999
Dear Baby Hannah,
I visited the cemetery for the first time today. You would have been six months old today.
Dad told me all the things about you that the lady told them. I went to play with Chloe
yesterday, and it breaks my heart to know she will never play with you in person again,
like it was meant to be. I guess she can see you when you come and visit us, I wish
we were as lucky to be able to do that. Yesterday she wanted me to watch her when
she was pushing the baby swing, and she told me she was pushing you. And I wonder
if you were really there, and if she was lucky enough to see you. She was playing with
her baby and fixing her hair and she kept calling her baby Hannah, and it is so hard to
hear that. Being there, made me feel so much closer to you though. I know you were
there and I know you were smiling while watching me and Chloe and Dad. It was so
hard to walk by your room and see everything there still, I was in Chloe's room with her
and could not help but cry when I look up and see your things still there, waiting for
you to come home. I just want you to know that you are a sweet little girl, and I was
so lucky to have you as a little sister, I love you so and I cannot wait to see you in Heaven.
Love,
Rhiannon
Justin Lee Hermann
|  | May 24, 1999
Dear Baby Hannah,
I just wanted to write you a little letter telling you that you are being thought of today, like everyday. Again, I went to your grave today. I keep thinking when I see my cousin Gunnar, that what he is doing is what you would be now. You and him are only 6 days apart. I think of all the fun things you would be doing and learning right now. It is not fair that you had to leave us so soon, it is not fair to us. We loved you so much, so many people did. I will miss you for the rest of my life. I will never forget how beautiful and smart and what a good good baby girl you are. You are always on my mind and in my heart.
Love until forever, Your big sister,
Rhiannon
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