CHAPTER TWENTY THREE-“The Perfect Little Fans”

 

There was a soft flow of sunlight streaming through Brian’s first floor window coming to rest directly on his lovely, reddish-brown hair, making it look orange in the bright sun’s glow.   I gazed as his light intake of air produced his chest slowly rise and fall. 

 

A sigh escaped my lips, as I recalled last night’s affair.  We had come together, as if we had to, or die, and when it was over, I laid enclosed in his arms, with the fading spasms of my first orgasm.  I knew that to the most shrewd and veteran person I would sound completely tedious and inexperienced, but last night was my first most intimate moment with any man I had ever been with. Though he may sometimes seem, virtuous or even at times juvenile, he was a man in every sense of the word, not to mention a marvelous lover.  Not that I had any past experience to base my judgment on, but no other man had ever made me feel the way Brian had.

 

As I lay there, exposed, in his arms, I could feel the passion and love he felt for me.  All the past worries I had had about me and him came to a fiery end last night.   I was sure, that no matter what the obstacle, our love would see us through. 

 

Little did I know, that though Brian may have made me feel like a real woman last night, I was still the same naïve little girl.

 

The day was progressing, and I knew I would soon have to go back up to my room.  I sat up, and reach for the nightshirt I had worn, which laid at the foot of the bed.  Rapidly Brian’s arms pulled me back.  Tenderly he placed small kisses over my face as his free hand stroked my hair before he embraced me against him. 

 

“I had a hard time falling asleep last night…” he softly said.

 

“So did I.”  I told him.

 

“Just when I was about to fall asleep, I could have sworn I heard you calling me.”  He continued.  “I saw my old guitar in the corner of the room, just where it has always been, and I started playing, but nothing I did took my mind off of you.”  He smiled.

 

He engulfed his face in my hair, and took me in, holding me tighter against his warm body. 

 

“Then,” he continued. “Just like a prayer answered, you came through my door.  The same way you came into my life.”  I smiled, but the next words he muttered caught my breath midway.  “I shouldn’t have allowed this to happen.”

 

I turned to face him, my eyes wide with shock.

 

“I’m so afraid you’re going to be sorry, I never want to hurt you, Belle.”

 

My expression softened.  “You could never hurt me.  I have never met a man so caring.”

 

His chuckle was low.  “How many men have you known at the tender age of eighteen?”

 

I turned away when he wanted to gaze into my eyes.  “Not many, I guess.  But regardless…you can’t hurt me, unless you wanted to hurt me.”

 

“And I don’t ever want to hurt you.”

 

“Then you won’t,” I said smiling up at him in a logical fashion.  His hands caressed me as he went to kiss my lips.

 

Jackie once again, being the warm person that she was, had breakfast set and ready at the table by the time I came down from Harold’s room.  I had showered, and dressed in the same clothes I had worn yesterday.

 

Brian and his dad teased, that usually they would have to rummage for their morning meal themselves because Jackie would have already gone off to the hospital, where she has always volunteered her services every morning.

 

“You should come over more often.”  Brian joked. 

 

“What are you doing tomorrow morning?”  His father quipped.  I laughed, as Jackie put them in their place.  I could see where Brian got his wittiness.

 

While at breakfast, Brian’s mom wondered if the roads had been cleared, since she was going to the hospital soon.  As if on cue, Harold came walking in through the door at that exact moment, putting our suspicions to rest.

 

“Hey.”  He said, as he came closer, hung his coat in the closet, and came to the table.  “No thanks,” he said to Jackie when she offered to serve him a plate.  “I already got something on my way over here.  Actually,” he began, looking at me.  “I’m surprised you made breakfast mom.”

 

“See, we weren’t exaggerating.”  Brian told his mom, giving her a kiss on the cheek as she got up and took her plate, and his with her.

 

“I wasn’t done.”  Brian told her.

 

“Yeah, you were.”  She said smiling. 

 

We all laughed. 

 

Brian and I waited in the car for his mom.  He was driving me back to the tour bus, and giving her a ride to the hospital.  When she got into the front seat, we took off.  She told Brian and me about how his foundation was progressing. Jackie would go every weekday morning, and help the hospital with all the correspondence for the Healthy Heart Club.

 

When we got to the hospital, Jackie begged Brian to go in with her just so he could say hello to some people.  At first he didn’t want to and used me as an excuse, saying I needed to get back to the bus, but when his mom asked if wanted to see the Healthy Heart Club, well how could I say no…  It wasn’t that Brian didn’t want to say hello, after all it was his foundation, it was just that he knew that if he went in, there was no way it was just to say hello.  There were so many people he would have to visit with, and he didn’t want to be rude, and seem as if he wanted to rush off.  As a matter of fact, he had a special inauguration to attend here tomorrow morning, but to please his mother, he put on a smile, and did as she told him to do.

 

“Ed.”  Brian said stretching out his arm for a distinct older man with thinning hair.  The older man smiled taking Brian’s hand into his.

 

Ed Wardle, I found out is the executive director of the Saint Joseph Hospital Foundation.  He dealt with all the special charities the hospital held, including Brian Littrell Healthy Heart Club for Kids.

 

Brian introduces me, and then Ed began to tell us about the developments, basically everything Jackie had already told us.  When he was done he asked Brian if he had some time to visit with the children of the hospital, they would be very excited to see him.

 

Without hesitations, Brian said.  “Of course.”

 

Jackie had already left us, and was in the room that Mr. Wardle led us to.  There was a huge smirk on both Ed, and Jackie’s face when we entered the room.  The small children of the Healthy Heart Club had been lined up, according to size, and looked simply adorable, as they recited in unison, “Hi Brian!”

 

Brian smiled, and was surprised to see the banner that was hanging from the back wall, which read, Happy Birthday Brian.

 

“Brian,” Mr. Wardle began, “The children wanted to be as kind and as generous with you, as you have been with them.  So with the help of your mother, they arranged this little surprise for you.”

 

Jackie told the young lady with the guitar sitting by the children to begin, and she played a small intro to, The Perfect Fan.

 

And all the small children began to sing in their childlike, innocent voices,  ”It takes a lot to know what is love.  It’s not the big things but the little things that can mean enough.  A lot of prayers to get US through, and there is never a day that passes by WE don’t think of you.  You were always there for me, pushing me and guiding me always to succeed…. You showed me….”

 

As they continued with the chorus, I could see Brian’s eyes begin to water.  He would look up at his mom, and then to Mr. Wardle, and then back to the children, and he shook his head in amazement. 

 

They were so adorable, with big smiles, and unbelievably happy faces.  They looked like the everyday children you saw on the streets, and in schools, and in the playgrounds, with so much energy and hope.  But they were different; they were even more special, because they faced things that most kids their age would never have to go through.  They would always be stronger. 

 

They continued to sing, their voices bright, as they changed a few words here and there to adjust the song for Brian…”Cause Brian you always were…OUR perfect fan…WE LOVE YOU BRIAN.”  They finished.

 

“Awwe.”  I sighed.

 

Brian looked over at me and laughed.  His eyes still looked watery.  He went over and hugged his mom, then said hello to each and every one of the children.  We sat with them, and like Mr. Wardle said, they were ALL extremely excited to be with him.

 

The little ones would even take turns sitting on his lap, or being carried by him.  They just wanted to be close to him and touch him.  It came natural to Brian, the comforting warmth that he gave to people.  It was a feeling he made me feel as well.

 

When we were leaving, all the children said goodbye, and that they couldn’t wait till tomorrow to see him.  Also, since they all couldn’t go to the concert tonight, Brian was going to ask the rest of the guys to come back with him tomorrow, which of course they wouldn’t mind doing.

 

“Bye mom,” Brian said, “And thanks.”  He gave her a hug, and told her he’d see her later on.

 

As soon as we got outside, Brian took hold of my hand and pulled me in for a hug.  “They are amazing, aren’t they?”  He asked, his face was flustered with excitement.  He truly was touched by what they did.

 

I smiled.  “Yeah, they are, they all are.”

 

When we got back to the bus, Brian went to his, and I went into Lina’s bus.  “Hi people, I’m back.” I called out.  It was strange, cuz at first I got no response, but then I heard some coughing in the back.  “Lina?  Kristin?”

 

I kept walking towards the back of the bus.  “Isabelle!”  Kristin yelled coming out of nowhere, and scaring me to death.  “I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you come in.  Come quick, Lina’s not feeling so good…again.”

 

I followed her to the bathroom, where Lina was crouched over the bowl, throwing up.  “Oh God, Lina what’s wrong?”  I said kneeling down beside her.

 

“She’s been like this all day.  From the moment I woke up I found her like this.”  Kristin said.

 

“Well did she take anything for it?”  I asked as I put my arm around Lina. 

 

“Fuck, Isa, I feel like shit!”  Lina said, brining her hand to her forehead.  I felt her temperature nope she was fine.

 

“She says it’s her stomach.”  Kristin informed me.

 

“Cramps?”  I asked.

 

“We don’t know.”  Kristin said.  “I was about to give her one of my home remedies, but I can’t do that till I know what’s wrong.” 

 

“What do you mean?”  I asked her curiously.  “It’s obviously some kinda stomach cramp.”

 

“Well,” Kristin said showing me something that was in her hand.  “We can’t be too sure about that, I mean…”

 

I took the home pregnancy test from her hand, practically snatching it.  “You’re kidding, right?”  I asked in disbelief. 

 

“No way, I’m not pregnant.”  Lina said.

 

“Well there’s only one way to find out, and if you’re not, I can fix something right up for you, that I swear will make you feel so much better.”

 

I kneeled back down.  “You gonna have to take this sweetie.”

 

“Isa, I’m not pregnant, I can’t be.”  Lina guaranteed.

 

“You’re on the pill, right?”  I asked her.

 

She nodded.

 

“Fine, then we just wanna make sure, ok.”  I told her taking her hand and lifting her up with me.

 

Kristin and I help Lina take the HPT.  She was so weak; she looked like she would pass out any second.  Once she took the test, we waited for it to clear.  A half and hour later…Kristin was in the kitchen making her special tea for Lina…it was all right for her to take it, she wasn’t pregnant according to the HPT. 

 

The witch’s brew, as Lina called it, smelled horrible, as I could imagine what it must taste like.  But with coaxing from Kristin, Lina took it and a few minutes later she was asleep in her bunk.  She needed to rest…she had a concert tonight.

 

Kristin and I sat in the kitchen, she was making us both some hot chocolate…which unlike her other concoction, smelled yummy.

 

“I don’t know what I’m going to do about her?” I said out loud, though it was meant to be just a thought.  “I don’t want to call my father, Kristin.”

 

“But maybe he knows how to help her” she told me.

 

“He probably does, but I know that will require taking her back to Canada, and there is no way I can take this tour away from her.  It’s the only thing she has.”

 

“That’s not true, she has you, and AJ, and her family, your dad, me, the rest of the guys.”

 

I smiled; she made it seem so simple.  “I don’t know, I was reading that book the other night.  The psychology book about dreams and stuff, there was this chapter there, that talked about hypnotizing patients to find out what it is that’s haunting them?”

 

“You think her cramps were because of her nightmares?”

 

“I don’t know, with Lina, everything has to do with those damn nightmares.  It has always been that way, well now always…there was that period of time where she seemed to be fine.  Though now it seems so long ago.  I don’t know…I have no clue what to do.”

 

“Do you want to hypnotize her?”  Kristin asked.

 

The thought had crossed my mind.  “Do you think that would help?”

 

“Well, the book said it would.  Or at least help you know what you need to know, to help her.”

 

“I guess we could try that.”  I told her.

 

“Well, you can just ask Lina to…”

 

“Never, she would never do it willingly, I know she wouldn’t.  We would have to do it without her knowing.  I have no clue how that works, but she can’t find out about it.  She can’t.”

 

Kristin nodded; signifying that she would help me, help Lina.

 

We sat there in silence, which was unusual for Kristin, because she always had something to say.  But when she finally said something, I was completely surprised at what she said.

 

“You know Isabelle, when you came through that door today, I noticed something very different about you.”

 

“What?”  I asked nonchalantly.  The only thing that came to my mind was that I had parted my hair a different way.

 

“You’re glowing.”  She said with a grin.

 

“What?!?”  I asked blowing off the idea as one of her usual astronomy notions.

 

“I said you are glowing.”

 

I got what she meant, and I never thought people actually glowed…well, at least not that it would show.  It became hard to hide the smile that was forming of my face.  “Is it that obvious?”  I asked her, letting the smile overcome my lips.

 

“Sweetheart, you’re beaming!”

 

I laughed.  “Oh God,” I said putting the cup of hot chocolate down, and covering my face.  It’s not that I was embarrassed, I just…I don’t know…it felt weird.

 

“I knew there was something going on between you and him from the moment I met you.”

 

I laughed again, “Let me guess, it was written in the stars.”  I joked.

 

“No, darling, it was in your eyes.”

 

I smiled.  “I’m in love, Kristin.” 

 

She smiled back.

 

“I always thought I knew what love was, if you would have asked me if I’d ever been in love, I would have said yes, but this feeling is new.  With Brian, it’s so different…I don’t know what it is, but it’s just so, I don’t know…perfect.”

 

“It isn’t perfect, it’s true.”  She said looking intently at me.  “Nothing’s ever perfect, remember that Isabelle, but what you and Brian feel for each other is genuine, it’s true.”

 

I nodded.  I never really knew what Kristin was talking about, at least not immediately.  But I knew one thing; she was a whole lot wiser than I was.

 

 

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