CHAPTER THIRTY-“Keep Your Friends Close…”

 

After their last concert in Seattle, I waited backstage for everyone to come out so we could make our nightly road trip as we headed to the next leg of the tour, in LA where we would be staying for two weeks.

 

“Isabelle!”  I heard someone call me from behind.  I looked around but didn’t see anyone I recognized in the crowd of teenyboppers who were waiting for the boys behind the orange tapeline.  “Isabelle!”  I heard one of them call again.  This time the small voice came from a cute, chubby, little girl, with curly, short, red hair.  She had her arms high in the air and she waved them back and forth to get my attention.

 

“Hi,” I said walking over to her.  “How do you know my name?” I asked her.

 

“I read a lot about you.”  She told me.  “Online.”

 

“Online?”  I asked curiously.

 

“Yeah.  You’re Angelina Mayfield’s cousin.  By the way I love her, she’s so pretty and she sings so good too.”

 

“Thank you, I’ll tell her you said that.”  I told her with a smile.

 

“Thanks, but can you do me a favor?”  She quickly added before I had time to walk away from her.

 

“Well if I can I’ll do it, but I can’t promise you anything.” I said sincerely.

 

“Could you sign this for me?”  She asked.

 

I was surprised.  No one had asked me to sign anything for them.  And honestly, I was honored.   “Awwe, that’s so sweet of you.  Sure I’ll sign it.”  I said as I took the Backstreet Concert program and found a nice spot on the front cover where all five boys were posing.  I signed my name, Isabelle Wakeford, near Brian on the picture. 

 

“Thanks!”

 

I smiled, but again before I could leave she called me back.

 

“Isabelle, can I ask for another favor.”

 

All right, I thought to myself.  Here it comes.

 

“Can you get this signed by the Backstreet Boys please?  Oh and Angelina Mayfield too. Please.  It would mean so much to me if you could.” 

 

This wasn’t new to me.  Every so often, more often than not of course, I got asked by fans to get them pictures, or autographs, or just little tokens to remember their BSB concert by.  And the more time I spent with the fans backstage, the more I realized just how important I was to them.  But most importantly, I realized just how important they where, and just how much they meant to the boys. 

 

“How about this,” I told her pulling her off to the side, and whispering in her ear.  “How would you like to meet the boys?  But you have to be very discreet about this, I can’t take all of these girls back to the dressing room with me.”  I added quickly.

 

I laughed as her cherubic face lit up with anticipation of what I was proposing to her.

 

“Are you serious?”  she whispered back.

 

“Yup.  You can get them and Angelina, to sign your promo book yourself.  How’s that sound?”  

 

“Amazing!”  She said with a huge smile.  “You really are as nice as everyone said you were.”

 

I smiled.  “Thanks.  Now come on.  The boys will be leaving soon, so we have to hurry.”  I told her as I grabbed the twelve or so year old by the hand, and pulled her along with me through the crowded backstage halls.  All of a sudden, the small girl gasped, and then let my hand go.

 

“Oh wow, it’s Leighanne Wallace.”  She yelled as she got Leighanne’s attention.  Leighanne seemed to be coming from the boys dressing room, and was either walking towards the bathroom, or the backstage exit.

 

“Hi there,”  Leighanne said almost too graciously.  “Did you enjoy the show?”

 

“Yes, it was the best, I loved it.”  The girl answered.  She stuck out her pen and concert program, and asked Leighanne to sign it. 

 

“Sure I’ll sign it for you.”  Leighanne smiled, and took it ever so sweetly.  “Here you go.” She told her handing it back.  “Now, you should go back to where all the other fans are, behind the tape.  You really aren’t allowed backstage.”

 

“Oh, well I’m with…”

 

“She’s with me.”  I said stepping up behind her.  “I’m taking her back to meet the guys.”

 

Leighanne shook her head.  “Isabelle, I would think you would know better by now.  The guys don’t meet anymore fans backstage.”  Then turning to the girl.  “I’m sorry honey, but if you weren’t scheduled for the meet and greet, then you aren’t allowed backstage.”

 

“It’s ok Leighanne.  I’ve done this before.  The boys don’t mind.”

 

“Well, rules are rules, Isabelle.  And the rule is, if you don’t have a pass you can’t come back here.”

 

“But I promised I’d take her to meet the guys.”  I pleaded.  Something I never did, but I felt bad for the girl.

 

“Well, you shouldn’t make promises you can’t keep.  You should have never been allowed to take anyone to see the guys.  It’s just not tolerated.  They are really busy, and not only that they’ve just finished an entire live concert.  Don’t you think they are tired?” she asked, looking at the girl for a response.

 

The girl somberly nodded her head, her small auburn curls flowing back and forth as she did.

 

“Now, I think you should just take her back where you found her.”  Then she thought for a minute.  “You know what, I feel sorry for you.  I’m sure you’re disappointed that she promised you the guys, when she wasn’t allowed to.  So how’s this grab you?”  she said grabbing the concert program from the girl.  “I promise that if you go back with Isabelle, and wait for near the front exit, I will get this signed by each and everyone of the guys for you.  Do you like that idea?” 

 

The girls face again lit up.  She wasn’t going to meet the boys, but this was better than nothing.  “Oh thank you, Leighanne.  That’s a great idea.  I’ll wait by the exit.  I promise, I won’t move.”

 

“Wonderful!”  She said with a quirky laugh, and then she looked at me.  “Isabelle, go with her, and make sure she gets back.  I’ll go get this signed by the boys.”  She said again smiling at the little girl.

 

I sighed, and did as she told me.  I apologized to the little girl, for not being able to deliver what I had promised.  “I’m really sorry.”  I told her.  “But no one has ever stopped me from bringing someone backstage with me.  Not security, nor the guys.”

 

“It’s ok, Isabelle, Leighanne’s going to get it signed for me.  She’s so great!” 

 

I forced a smile, and said. “Yes, she is.”  I said goodbye, and told her to wait for Leighanne to bring her back her autographed program.

 

As I headed back to the dressing room, I bumped into Yvonne who told me to start getting into the tour bus.  We’d be leaving soon.  Again, I did as I was told and followed one of the roadies who were packing the Backstreet equipment onto to bus.

 

“Hi John,” I said as I got in.  He was sitting in his usual spot, reading a newspaper.

 

“Hello there, Miss.  How was the concert?”

 

“Wonderful, as usual.”  I told him. Though I wish I could say the same about everything else.

 

“That’s good, Miss.”  He said as he went back to reading his paper.

 

Kristin was already on the bus, and she was loading some suitcases.  “Here, let me help you.”  I offered, as we stored the suitcase up on the overhead compartment. 

 

“Thanks.” She said.

 

Then it hit me.  “Hey, when did you take a suitcase with you to Seattle?”  I asked.

 

Her face went inquisitive, and she bit her bottom lip.  “Well sweetie, that suitcase isn’t mine.”  She told me.

 

“Then who’s is it?”  I asked beginning to get worried.

 

“Hello, I’m Leighanne.  I’ll be boarding on your bus for the rest of the tour.”  I heard, as I turned around to see Leighanne introducing herself to John.  Lina was coming up behind her.

 

I looked to Kristin for an answer, as Leighanne walked pass us, and headed for the bunkrooms. 

 

I turned from her, and then looked at Lina.  She shrugged, and then said.  “Keep your friends close, and your enemies even closer.”

 

Kristin looked at Lina and then said.  “We don’t know, Isabelle.  She just said she wanted to bunk with the girls, and well…” Kristin stuttered as she tried to explain.

 

“You invited her on?”  I asked turning to Lina.

 

“She just invited herself on.”  Lina finished off.  “You know I’d never do that to you.”

 

I sighed.  “Whatever.  I’m going to bed.  I have a headache.”  I said, and then walked away.

 

Again, that night, like the one before I had a hard time sleeping.  But I tried as hard as I could in keeping my head clear of all the problems that were plaguing me.  Amusingly enough, I tried everything to get myself to sleep.  From counting sheep, to reciting the alphabet backwards, finally, I concentrated on the motor of the tour bus.  It had a tedious sound to it, and it was actually working when suddenly, it was shut off.

 

“Huh?”  I said to myself, as once again I came out of sleep.  “Are we here already?”  I pulled back the small curtain and looked for a tall building resembling either our next venue, or the hotel where we would be staying.  But I saw neither.  We weren’t even in a parking lot.  I got up from my bunk, and since I wouldn’t be getting any sleep ‘til this bus started moving again, I was going to find out where we were.

 

“John?”  I called out, as I walked towards the kitchen area of the tour bus.  I noticed one of the boys concert programs laying face down on the table.  Sadly, I flipped it around, setting my notion, as I saw my name signed cursively near Brian.  I sighed and shook my head, as I picked it up and threw it in the trash.  “It’s not going to do me any good to confront her about it, and it definitely won’t be doing that little girl any either.”

 

I pulled back the curtain that divided the drivers seat, from the rest of the bus, to find John not there.  I looked out the front window, and saw him standing over by the side of the bus.

 

“Hi,” I said walking outside and finding it surprisingly warmer than it’s been on our trip.  “Is something wrong with the bus?”

 

“OH, Miss.”  John said.

 

“I’m sorry.” I said apologizing for my startling him.  “I just couldn’t sleep, and I felt the bus stop moving.”

 

“It’s quite alright Miss.  You just scared me there for a second.  Nothing’s wrong.  No, least not with the bus, here.”  He said patting the side of the bus.  “Actually,” he said walking towards the front of the bus.  “You’re friends back there.”  He said pointing towards the road.  “Took a wrong turn, setting us back about an hour or so.”

 

“You mean the Backstreet’s tour bus?”  I asked.

 

“Yes, they wouldn’t listen to me, and instead of turning left like I had told them to back at the fork in the road, they took a right and ended up taking the turnpike back North,”  he pointed again towards the road.  “Where we came from.”

 

I nodded my head, then looked down at my feet.  We were on a dirt road and up in front of me was what had to be the deepest ravine I had ever seen.  “OH Wow!”  I cried out, when I noticed how close we were to it.  “That’s an incredibly fall.”

 

He laughed.  “That’s the truth.  More than four thousand foot drop down there.” He said pointing downwards towards the ravine. 

 

I looked down following his finger.  “Oh Lord!”  I said as I felt myself go dizzy.  I sat down on the ground, not caring that my pj’s would be getting dirty.

 

Again he laughed, this time it was louder, and it resounded in the echo created by the canyon.  “Don’t worry Miss, you’d be dead long before you hit the ground, the fall alone would do it.”  He joked.

 

I smiled ironically. “Well, I’ll just sit right here for now, if you don’t mind.”

 

“Go right ahead Miss.”  He said, and then he took a seat right next to me.

 

I looked out onto the ravine, as it met the sky half way.  The sky looked amazing tonight, as millions stars adorned it like tiny freckles.  I rested my head back, against the bumper of the bus, which was still warm.  I looked up at a star that shone directly above me, and embraced it as my lucky star.  I closed my eyes, and was about to make a wish when I realized there were so many things to wish for.  If I was only allowed one wish, how could I possibly fix everything that was going wrong?  One thing I knew was that I wish Brian was here with me right now.  He’d know what I should wish for.  And if he didn’t, he always found the right thing to say to guide me in the right direction.  Brian…  I sighed.  I really wish he could be with me right now.  Make me feel safe as he held me in his arms, and told me everything would turn out fine.

 

“You know Miss,” I heard John’s voice interrupt my thoughts.  “I’ve always been told I’m a good listener.”

 

“I wouldn’t want to trouble you with my problems, John.”  I told him.

 

“Trust me Miss, it would be no trouble at all.  There’s nothing out there, that I haven’t heard.” 

 

I smiled, but I said nothing.

 

After a while, he said.  “You know Miss, on nights like this you could hear a quarter as it made its way towards the very bottom of the ravine.  Cutting the air like a jackknife.”

 

I looked over at him.

 

“And then, as it would hit the ground…nothing but silence.”  He said as he demonstrated the silence by being quiet for a bit less than a minute.  “Not even a scratch on the shinny silver surface.  Everything’s like that, Miss.”

 

He looked at my face of confusion, and continued to explain his theory. 

 

“You see Miss, things are either one way, or the other.  Either things go smoothly, and everything’s calm till the very end when it all goes down big, like an explosion.  Or things can get out of control, and you can feel the fall as you’re heading down, but then you land quietly and unexpected to anyone including yourself, you find that you made it through in one piece.

 

I nodded, letting him know that I understood what he meant.  Then a bright light shone over us as the lost tour bus came into view. 

 

“Well,” John said as he strained to get up.  I quickly brought myself to my feet and helped him.  “Guess we should be heading on our way.  C’mon.”  He said as he directed me to follow him back on the bus.  “We don’t have much to go now.  The hotel is just about a mile down from the entrance to LA.  You won’t have much time to catch up on your sleep.”  He sat back down on the driver seat, and started the engine up as I headed back towards my bunk. But before I got there, he called one last time.  “Whatever it is Miss, that is keeping you up at night.  It will soon go down.  But if you make it out without a scratch or not…that’s up to the fall…and up to you.”

 

I nodded, and he smiled back at me then winked.

 

“You’re a strong girl.  You’ll make it out on top.”  He said assumingly.

 

As I got back into my bunk, and pulled the cover up to my chin, I pulled back the curtain and watched as we left the crevice.  I lowered my head to my pillow, as we passed the ‘You are now entering LA’ sign.  I pulled the blanket close to me, and closed my eyes.  What John had said ringed in my head.  And I figured he was right.  Either way things were definitely going to come to an end.  They had to.  Everything did.  But I was doubtful about me coming out on top.  I just wish I had more faith in myself, as John did. 

 

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