(An imprisoned Mitch gives Todd access to all of his money)

Mitch: "Well, this is quite a leap of faith on my part, Brother...trusting you with this. I'm taking that leap because I believe in the bond of our blood."

Todd: "Is this everything?" (Mitch concurs) "She won't get your money, Brother. Is it, 'Deliver him from going down into the pit...I have found a ransom'? Is that sort of how it goes?"

Mitch: "Job 33:24."

Todd: "Yeah, I'm sure you're right. No, she won't get the money. And you'll never see it again either. After all, you're going to rot in prison till the day you die!!" [Laughs crazily]



Mitch: "You can't abandon me."

Todd: "Oh, sure I can. You're crazy as a loon."



Blair: "A lie is a lie is a lie."

Todd: "Not if it's not important."



(At the Palace Hotel)

Bo: "Where are you going?"

Todd: "The bathroom. You wanna go?"



(To Elyssa, the Private Investigator)

Todd: "Don't go thinking on your own -- I hate that!!"



Blair: (About Dorian) "You don't have to leave -- because of her."

Todd:"I'll be back -- because of you."



Todd: (About Flynn) "...living in the shadows like some freeze-dried corpse."



Todd: (After Flynn offers him a drink) "No, thanks. That stuff gives me bags under your eyes."



Flynn: "We need each other."

Todd: "I love it when you get all warm and fuzzy."



Flynn: "I'm not happy."

Todd: "You? I gotta live with your face the rest of my life."



Todd: (To Flynn) "You've got guts...showing our face around Llanview."



Evangeline: (Suspicious that Todd is connected the P.I. Elyssa's disappearance) "Did she get something on you?"

Todd: "Yeah, I think she may have spilled some guacamole on my shirt."



Todd: (To Kevin) "If you can't fight dirty, you can't fight me."



Kevin: (About revealing Todd's true identity to everyone) "I'd be inclined to tell them the truth."

Todd: "What, how you keep your choppers so pearly white?"



Todd: "It kinda seems like our relationship, where we're locked together, but something always comes between us."

Blair: Oh, you mean, like, maybe your lies, your jealousy, or maybe general insanity? What do you think?"

Todd: "Well, you've had your moments, too."



Nora: "..and you're not an impulsive, angry man anymore?"

Todd: "No. No, I'm not, because I have Blair. When someone that beautiful loves you, you can't be a monster anymore."



Blair: "Well, would you stop acting like you care?"

Todd: "I do care. I love you."

Blair: "And you can stop saying that, too, Todd."

Todd: "I can't help it."



Todd: "Look at you, Kelly. You're a pretty good Madonna, but you're no Blair."



Kevin: "Hey, where have you been?"

Viki: "Taking a walk."

Kevin: (about Todd) "With him?"

Todd: "No, with Santa Claus. But we can't tell you about it till you grow up!"



Todd: "You're supposed to say you can be a new man, blah, blah, blah..."

Viki: "Maybe I need a new speech."

Todd: "Nah, I like the old one."



Todd: "I've got nothing but my memories, Viki. I love my children. I miss them. I can't help it. I love Blair, I miss her, I can't help it. Yeah, I know it's weird after the way she's treated me. But... I dream about her. I love her. I always have, always will. What a life, huh?"



Kevin: "Why don't you go to hell?"

Todd: "I've already been there.... remember? It's your turn now."



Kelly: "What, are you just going to stand there and let Kevin steal your wife?"

Todd: "Kevin couldn't steal the time of day off me."



Todd: "Uh-oh."

Blair: "What?"

Todd: "I'm gettin' that weird feeling again."

Blair: "What?"

Todd: "The happy thing."





Todd: "Hey, Blair."

Blair: "What?"

Todd: "If you shoot someone tonight, make sure not to leave any fingerprints."



Todd: (to Margaret) "Stay the he!! away from me and stop being so ridiculously stupid!"



Kevin: "I'm not shaking your hand."

Todd: "I washed it before I came over."



Todd: (About baby "Ace") "It is an interesting looking child, but it's not mine."



Todd: "Asa's a few hay bales short of a hay-ride."



Blair: (About Todd being a better man now) "It's taken me a long time to see it."

Todd: "It's taken me a long time to be it."



Todd: (To Duke) "Keep your boots on, Cowpoke."



Todd: (At the mansion) "Okay, Asa, you got to shoot your gun, you did your whole country thing, now why don't you go and get back on your d@mn horse!"




Main Page