My Parents never taught me hate, so I didn’t know how to deal with it.  So I cried and fought it everyday — — I asked God for help, God told me to put the HATE in His Hands, so I did. . .Then He told me to start forgiving, and it would take up most of my time. . .

I really didn’t understand that part until recently. . . Being in Prison everyday I’m forgiving someone in here, simply by saying, “God Bless them they can use some help.”  I Bless the Guards as well. . . They at times can be worse than the Inmates. . .

Well my time is always occupied, and I’m Charles again. . . But I’ll be honest HATE was strong and hard to control.  It ruled me, it was in charge of me, hate fed me and spoke to me.  All my words had hate behind them. . . I cried, cause I had no control of myself.  I cried for nothing, until I learned that that was not the case.  By crying I put my head down in a praying position.  Please don’t let anyone tell you different, hate does not allow you to bow your head. . .When I cried, my head went down, eyes closed . . .tears flowing, God Was Right There!

I kid you not, the only words that came out of my mind and mouth was, God Help Me.  There was no hate there, only God . . . . when I lifted my head and looked around, I saw hate waiting for me to speak, hate did nothing until I spoke.  It may sound strange or weird, but its absolutely true.  If I didn’t talk hate had no power over me, when I put my head down, I only felt one presence, and it wasn’t hate.  Something or someone asked if I was OK, and I answered that voice with — Yes, thank you.  Who was that Voice?

I slept for 2 days and cried for 3 days, one day I stopped crying.  And sleep for me was Prayer Time. . .Wow, so that was hate Huh. . . Ha Ha Ha!  Piece of cake. . . I can say that now, but I was every bit of scared—until I put my head down in a praying position, and it all came quite natural.  Hate can never rule me or control me, it can only show itself.  This doesn’t make me any stronger than the next person, all I did was let go and put my head down with my eyes closed, and just listened, “Someone Spoke to me!”

Please give anyone my address who might need someone to talk too.  I kinda like Angel work, it comes natural to me.  I know what I’m doing without knowing how, “Well I actually do know how.”  But the average person may not understand. . . Ask anyone, “Have you ever known hate to bow its head.”  No—Hates Head is always up and creating havoc and despair and friends. . .I have Faith, and I’ve been tested, I have more to go through and I’m ready. . .Its going to hurt I’m sure, but I’m also more than sure I’ll be alright.  All I have to do is Cry!

Charles 

Charles would like people to write to him, his address is on his Index page link below, which will be updated when he gets moved.