by: Laserbeak
Disclaimer: Darkwing Duck, Morgana Macawber, Quackerjack, Megavolt, etc are property of Disney and were used without permission. Cryptic Von Macawber and Lilian Bushroot are borrowed from friends who I hope don’t mind.
“You want us to WHAT?!?”
Mayhem’s yelp echoed through the entire lighthouse, making Megavolt flinch and nearly drop the large blue light bulb he’d been polishing. Dusky scrambled up his back and hid himself under the cover of Megavolt’s jumpsuit. “I hear ya,” the villain mumbled and careful set the bulb down on the self.
“Father…I’m not cutting myself off from the family…didn’t I go to Cousin Cryptic’s wedding a few months ago??? Yes…yes Father, I understand...but you know how much Morgana irks me and that Drake guy of hears isn’t much better…fine…I’ll do it.”
Mayhem sighed heavily and hung up the phone before entering the so-called-living-room and slumping onto the couch, leaning forward with her elbows resting on her knees and massaging her temples.
“Uh..do I want to know?” he asked at last.
“No..” She sighed. “My father thinks I’m cutting myself off from the family so he’s arranged for you and I to go to the movies tonight with my Cousin Morgana and her boyfriend Drake.”
“Oh.” He didn’t really comment much on this. Things had always been a bit odd since he’d met and fallen for Mayhem. He’d gone to frequent dinners at the manor in Transylvania (thank God they finally started serving beverages other than blood!), seen Bushroot married to a lovely southern belle named Lilian, and oddest of all, Negaduck reformed and in love! After that there really wasn’t much shock in life.
“It might not be so bad..”
“You don’t know my cousin and her boyfriend..he’s so egotistic..errr..well, I suppose we might as well make the best of it..what’s the worst that can happen, right?”
* * *
The couple waited outside the movie theater without much eagerness. Megavolt was dressed in his usual jumpsuit, but he was wearing a long coat over it and had substituted glasses for the goggles and plug hat after some coaxing. Mayhem wore a simple black slip dress, with an overcoat that hid her tail and had managed to style her hair in a way that ALMOST hide her lupine ears. Nothing she could really do about the paws though, so she kept them stuffed in her pockets.
After what seemed like forever someone tapped her on the shoulder and she turned to see her cousin, forcing on a stained smile of warmth.
“May!”
“Morgue!”
The cousins embraced briefly, exchanging the classic Hollywood kisses on the cheek that they always used, then turned to make introductions.
“May, you know Drake, right? I think you met him once at a family reunion.”
“Riiight.” She forced another plastic smile to the short male duck in his jacket and usual sweater vest. “Hi Drake. This is Elmo.” She slipped an arm around Megavolt and hugged him closer, more out of need for him to be close and comfort her than introductional purposes.
The two men exchanged greetings but an odd look flashed over both their faces.
~Do I know this guy?~ Drake wondered briefly, ~He seems so familiar….oh well, must be my imagination.~ A similar idea crossed Megavolt’s mind..but since his memory had been hampered by his constant direct use of electricity he shrugged it off as they entered the theater and took their seats.
Mayhem shifted to rest her head on her boyfriend’s shoulder. “Can you pass me the popcorn, Megs..er..Elmo?”
Drake raised an eyebrow at this, but said nothing as the popcorn passed between the four of them and rapidly disappeared.
The were-duck fumbled around at the bottom of the bag and came up with a handful of unpopped seeds, “Ah man!! That really sucks!! What a waste…”
“Oh, let me!” Megavolt dumped the seeds into his palm and a jolt of electricity ran through his hand, instantly making each seed explode into a fresh curdle of popcorn. That was all Drake needed and instantly he was on his feet standing in to chair, an accusing finger leveled at the started rat.
“I knew it!! I knew there was something wrong here!! You’re that fiendish pilferer of electrical power, Megavolt!!! Prepare to face defeat, you lousy low-down lunatic!!” he crowed as people began to complain about him blocking the screen.
Suddenly a cloud of purple smoke filled the theater and Drake disappeared, followed by a cry, “I am the Terror that Flaps in the Night! I am critic who is giving your show and double thumbs down!!! I am DARKWING DUCK!!”
“What?? You????? HERE?!” Megavolt jumped up and threw his coat off, retrieving his goggles and hat from one of the pockets and powering up. “This time you’re toast, Duck!! Mwahahaha!!!”
The two Macawber cousins traded stunned looks.
“You’re dating Megavolt?????”
“You’re dating Darkwing Duck?????”
The other citizen patrons of the movie screamed and fled in a stampede as the two archenemies began to trade crossfire. Morgana and Mayhem dodged behind a row of seats as one of Megavolt’s bolts of lightning fired the screen, sending sparks flying. The two females screamed at their respective other halves to call a cease-fire.
“Dark!!!”
“Megs!!!”
“STOP!!!!!!” they snapped in unison. And were completely ignored and the two old rivals got each other in choker holds and continued to trade punches. That was all the woman could take.
Mayhem felt herself half transforming into a much larger being, a bipedal snarling black wolf and she grabs Megavolt up by the back of his jumpsuit collar so his feet dangled three feet from the floor.
Meanwhile Morgana’s green eyes had begun to glow in a look Darkwing knew all to well and before he could do more than gulp she zapped him with a ray of magic. When the air cleared in his place sat a chocolate pudding with a beak and eyes.
Megavolt blinked, then pointed and broke into riotous laughter, “He’s pudding AGAIN!!! Mwahahahahaha!!!!!”
The wolf raised an eyebrow at her cousin. "I see you still haven’t perfected the transformation spell yet…”
* * *
Megavolt and Mayhem sat slumped over on the couch together. He had a heating pad pressed against his aching back and she was holding an ice pack against her throbbing head. “What a night…” she mumbled.
Just then the phone rang, making her cringe and cover her wolfen ears. He grabbed the phone before it gave off another shrill announcement and panted the side of her head. “Sorry. Hello? Quacky?? Hey!!”
Mayhem closed her eyes and slumped against him. Just what she needed. Normally she enjoyed Quakerjack’s company. He was Megs’ best friend, after all, but after narrowly evading the cops when they all had snuck out of the theater and the other mishaps she was in no mood to be chased by giant chattering teeth toys. Although thoughts going back to tonight she did wonder how long it would take Morgana to change Darkwing back to his true form.when they’d all parted ways he had been a sea sponge…she giggled a bit.
“Uh…well…this might not be the best time to ask her but I can try,” Megavolt said uncomfortably into the receiver, twisting the singed cord around in his hands as he turned to his girlfriend and smiled weakly. “Quacky met this really cute jester girl at the circus and he wants to know if we’ll go on a double date with him.”
Mayhem just groaned and covered her face with a pillow.
