Inuyasha: “Look out! They’re attacking! I’ll take care of them!”
Maury: “NO! No, um, please sit down Mr. Inuyasha. They’re only the audience. They’re happy to see you."
Inuyasha: “So…they’re…not youkai***?”
***Youkai. Japanese for "Demon"
Maury: “I…don’t think so.”
Inuyasha: “Oh. Ok then.”
*Inuyasha sits down in a chair next to Miroku*
Maury: “…right… So, Inuyasha, as I understand it, you have a homosexual relationship with Miroku. Is that true?”
Inuyasha: “NO! I can’t believe you just said that! You’ve just provided inspiration for hundreds of Shounen-Ai fanfics!"*** ***Shounen-Ai Fanfics. "Shounen-Ai" is a term that means "boy love" and a fanfic (or "fanfiction) is a story written by a fan.
*Inuyasha scoots his chair a few feet away from Miroku’s*
Maury: "So, you’re denying it. What do you have to say about this Miroku?”
Miroku: “Even I have standards Maury, and that’s a line I just will NOT cross.”
Maury: “Oh really? Then maybe you’d like to explain to our viewers what’s going on in this photo?”
*Inuyasha and Miroku are both silent. They’re faces are getting redder by the second*
Inuyasha: “Where did you get that!?! I’ll KILL whoever sent that in!!!”
Maury: “No, I’m afraid we can’t reveal the identity of the person who gave us this. We'll just call him “Tesshoumaru”
*Inuyasha runs offstage shouting “Sesshoumaru! I’ll get you for this!!! I‘m going public with those photos of you painting your finger nails!!! Who‘s sexual preferences do you think will be in question then?!?”*
Maury: “O…k…well, Miroku, can you explain to us what this picture is about?”
Miroku: “Gladly. You see, this picture was completely taken out of context Maury. I was whispering something to Inuyasha. That’s all, just whispering. That’s why I’m so close to him in this photo.”
Maury: “Whispering?”
Miroku: “Yes. Just whispering.”
Maury: “And…why did you need to rub Inuyasha’s arm in order to whisper to him?”
Miroku: “I…I…saw a bug on it. I was swishing it off.”
Maury: “But, then why did you - “
Miroku: “LET’S JUST DROP THE SUBJECT, OK MAURY!?!”
Maury: “Ok, have it your way. I’m afraid we have to go to commercial break now. We’ll be right back.”
COMMERCIAL
Maury: “We’re back. If you’re just joining us, we’re talking to Miroku. He’s just denied the long-standing rumors of homosexuality that have plagued his career, despite photographic proof.”
Miroku: “Maury, when I spoke to you on the phone prior to the show, you agreed that you wouldn’t talk about this.”
Maury: “I lied. Our next guest is a village woman who has bravely decided to confront her dark and heartless attacker. Let’s welcome her!”
Miroku: “Dark and heartless attacker? Who’s that Maury?”
*Woman walks out on stage, looking a bit afraid*
Maury: “It’s very brave of you to stand up to Miroku, ma’am.
Miroku: “What!?”
Woman: “Thank you Maury. I want this man to know he ruined my life.”
Miroku: “Wait…I don’t like the direction this is going…what’s all this about?”
Maury: “Please ma’am, tell us exactly what happened. Take us into your nightmarish world of Miroku fear.”
Woman: “I was walking along a road just outside my village, when I tripped on a stone and twisted my ankle. I lay there for a few minutes, trying to decide how to get back to the village, when I saw this man walking up. “Please sir, can you help me get home?” I asked him. He said he would. He picked me up, and carried me back to my village. I was very grateful, who knows how long I would’ve been stranded on that road if it weren’t for him? When we got to my village, he sat me down on a wooden fence. And….and….”
(Just a little bit left, thanks for sticking around for this long! ^_^)
