Jon McDaniel: The two combatants are already in the ring, so let's get right to the action.
(Too Panz attempts a lock up with Solstice but has trouble connecting. Solstice whips Too Panz into the ropes and nails him with a clothesline.)
Brian Rentfro: You know, if you really look, that isn't Too Panz at all! That's Carlos Baerga! What is he doing in the ring?
(Too Panz is groggy after the clothesline and Solstice takes advantage and starts to lock on a Boston Crab. Before it is even clinched in, Too Panz is tapping out.)
Jon McDaniel: That is the most bizarre thing I've seen in a long time, Brian.
Brian Rentfro: I've heard Too Panz wasn't happy in Europe and was leaving early for the States, so maybe he had Carlos fill in for him?
Jon McDaniel: Whatever the case, President Robinson won't be pleased with this.
Jon McDaniel: There's no denying it, folks. We're not coming to you live. Since this is showing at 8:00 central time there in the States, that would put us at 2:00 in the morning in Dublin. I feel better having that off my chest.
Brian Rentfro: But, London's Burning will be live since it is starting here at 1:00 in the afternoon!
(The Shadow charges Dutch and knocks him out with a Northern Lights Suplex. The Shadow makes an early cover. 1...2.kickout. Shadow pulls Dutch up and whips him into the ropes and catches him in a spinebuster coming off. Pulling Dutch up again, Shadow executes a backbreaker.)
Jon McDaniel: The Shadow is doing a good job working the back in the match!
(Dutch tries to fight back with a right hand, but Shadow blocks it into an armdrag takedown. Shadow jumps up and comes down hard on Dutch with a legdrop. Pulling Dutch up again, Shadow hits a nice slingshot suplex off the ropes. He covers 1...2...3.)
Brian Rentfro: That was a good match by the Shadow. He didn't try to do more than he had to to put away Dutch. That's good strategy on your first match. There's no point in giving away too much of your playbook before you need to.
Ring Announcer: Introducing first, Monkey McDee!
(Monkey McDee's voice booms over speakers, "WHO IS THE GREATEST?! ISN'T IT EASY TO SEE?! THE BESTEST OF THE BEST! OH YES.IT'S MONKEY MCDEE!!" "Brass Monkey", by Beastie Boys, soon blasts into the arena and as the first five notes are played, red fountain pyros go off horizontally across the entryway in accordance with each note. Red spotlights move rapidly around the arena as Monkey McDee enters. He is clad in a red tank top, and black wrestling tights inscribed with "Monkey" written down his left leg in red lettering and outlined in white. As he walks down the ramp, he smiles wide as his left arm swings behind his body like a tail. McDee rolls into the ring and climbs the turnbuckles, displaying "M's" formed by his fingers.)
Ring Announcer: And his opponent, Eclipse!
(Suddenly, the lights go out. When they come back on, McDee is laid out in the ring and Eclipse is standing with one foot on his chest and holding a microphone.)
Eclipse: You wanted Chaos, Spider. NOW YOU'VE GOT IT!
(Eclipse rolls out of the ring and heads up the ramp.)
Jon McDaniel: That couldn't have gone worse for McDee. What if he got a concussion from that attack right before his big World title shot at London's Burning?
Brian Rentfro: Then Panzadise is getting a free ride, Johnny boy.
Jon McDaniels: Rumor in the back has it that the management is disappointed in the performance of the Heels and they may not be with the company past this tour. So, if that rumor is true I'm sure that their entrance will get edited out during post-production.
Ring Announcer: And their opponents, The Spider and Scottie Snow!
(Snow and Spider run to the ring and start pounding on the Ultimate Heels. Snow scoops up Gangster and nails his sitdown piledriver while Spider DDTs Vicks and climbs up top. Campbell comes crashing down with the Hero's Victory. 1...2...3!)
Brian Rentfro: Yep, I'd say the Heels are on their way out of the company...
(The lights go out...)
Jon McDaniel: Is this Eclipse coming back? He promised the Spider he'd get Chaos!
(After several minutes, the lights come back on to find Snow and the Spider laying on the mat and the Heels are laying on the ground. Lindsey Campbell is cowering in one corner of the ring holding a scrap of silk.)
Brian Rentfro: That's the shirt that the Spider was wearing and Draven ripped! What the hell is going on here?
Jon McDaniel: I've got no idea, but I'm glad we've only got one match left to go!
Ring Announcer: Introducing first, the challenger...Mark Bagwell!
(Bagwell walks to the ring amidst a loud chorus of boos.)
Ring Announcer: His opponent, the reigning PWA Internet Champion, Jay!
(Spit it Out" by SlipKnot blares over the PA. As his music hits the lights go out but no pyros explode. The lights just shade in as he walks down the isle with a serious face, sometimes exposing an evil smirk. He wears long black tights that are Black and Silver with his name, "Jay", on one side and on the other it reads The Chamber Crippler. His body and hair are soaked in water. He wears black and silver elbow/knee pads and no shirt.)
(Jay and Bagwell circle each other before locking up. Jay pulls back and monkey flips Bagwell. Bagwell runs at Jay and takes him down with a lariat. Jay locks on an armbar, but Bagwell quickly gets to the ropes. Jay ducks under a right hand and swings around locking Bagwell in a full nelson then hits a reverse Russian legsweep.)
Jon McDaniel: A nice fast paced match so far. You can tell both men want that title!
(Jay goes to pull Bagwell up, but Bagwell pulls him into a small package. 1...2..kickout. Bagwell throws Jay halfway across the ring with a release German suplex. He goes to pick up the champ for another German suplex, but Jay grabs the ropes to block then hits a jawbuster. Jay climbs up top and attempts a moonsault, but Bagwell rolls out of the way. Bagwell pulls something out of his tights and waits for Jay to get up. As the champ gets standing, Bagwell punches him with the foreign object and hides it in his tights again. Bagwell covers. 1...2...3!)
Ring Announcer: Your winner and NEW PWA Internet Champion...Mark Bagwell!
Jon McDaniel: Bagwell cheated to win that title!
Brian Rentfro: Hey, whatever it takes.
Jon McDaniel: These two men will meet again on Sunday, so this clearly isn't the end of this war. But for now, we're out of time and we'll see you all at London's Burning!