"The Edge of the Coin" by Ryoken |
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What was she? That was the only question that flowed through her mind. She couldn’t remember much of anything. She knew who she was, thatwas easy. She was Seacia. But what she was was still a mystery. She looked down at her three claws. She didn’t remember having them before. Then the pain started again. It had been constantly bothering her and she couldn’t shake it off. Standing up, she thought she might be able to find some food outside of the cave. It was raining hard, and when she tried to go out, the rain burned her. Now why would it do that? I don’t recall a little water hurting me before. She tried putting her hand out again, but it burned like acid. She looked at her claws. They looked like they were melting, but they soon regenerated, although very slowly. Hunger hit her again. She felt as though any other human would go mad at this type of confusion she had, but she knew she was perfectly sane. She wished the rain would stop, she might be able to gather more answers. After a few minutes, the rain had stopped. She jumped down from her cave and for a split second she remembered the ground would still be wet, but it was not. It confused her, but she wasn’t worried about it. In the distance, she could just barely see what looked like the outline of a human. In what only seemed a few steps, she reached the human. She hadn’t been detected yet, but for some strange reason, she was compelled to bite his neck. Her hunger pained her harder than ever before, and she decided to let her instincts take control of her actions. With stunning stealth, the human never knew what had happened to him. She drank his blood, while thinking, this is madness! How could I have become a vampire, I cannot recall such events happening to me! Finished with her meal, memories blossomed in her mind. She saw herself, as what appeared to be her human self. Then she saw what looked like a vampire pounce upon her, dragging her into an alley to take her blood. She realized that her attacker was none other than the infamous Kain himself. She clenched her fist so hard she bled. So...he is the reason why I am a vampire. That bastard will pay dearly for this. She sniffed the air, her sense of smell had increased dramatically and she could smell the stench of a vampire nearby. She thought she’d surprise the cursed thing with an attack from above. Jumping without effort, she reached the top of an archway and crouched into a pouncing position. Soon her prey was in sight. It was a Melchahim, although how she knew this was unknown to her. Once within range, she leapt with grace and landed on the fledgling’s chest on her feet, crushing the thing’s rib cage and killing it. She smiled at her first vampiric kill. It wouldn’t have been as easy as a human. She kicked its corpse aside, there was no way she would drink the blood of such an ugly thing. Again, she could smell another vampire approaching. Two of them this time, they must have heard the fledgling’s bones crack. Thinking how fun this all seemed to be, she leapt back up to her spot and waited for them. They were Dumahim, stronger than the Melchahim by far, but they seemed to be no match for her. She walked on all fours like a hunting cat, with a devious smile on her face as she hid in the shadows. They came upon the corpse of the Melchahim and didn’t seem to ponder over it for long. They seemed afraid. Her smile grew bigger and she pounced upon the one nearest her, again, breaking his rib cage and instantly killing him. The other seemed to back away and then an odd thing happened. Seacia let out what sounded like some sort of howling roar at the Dumahim. The Dumahim ran as fast as legs could carry him and she laughed with much more joy than she had felt in a long time. She would have to thank Kain now, it was exhilarating to feel the fear of vampires cower before her. Now sure that the Dumahim would be back with friends, she didn’t think it wise to stay here. So she traveled onward. She saw a flag that told her she was in Melchah’s territory. Deciding it might be able to befriend the Razielim, she decided to press onward through the Melchahim territory. She went through with relative ease, no one seemed to care that she was here, nor were there many here to care. As she exited through a gate, to her dismay, was at a small lake. How was she to get past this obstacle? Seeing the nearby wall, she tried hooking her claws upon it to climb, but to no avail. She wished at that very moment that she could fly. But then she spotted the tops of the columns stick out from the water. Of course, how could she have so incompetent? They were a bit slippery, but she gained access to a new area. She came to an oval room with the Melchah symbol on opposite sides of the room. She had heard of these before, these were teleportation rooms! At least now getting around would be a bit easier. It was then that she smelled it. It was a powerful vampire blood. She couldn’t recognize the scent, but she knew she had best hide, it was headed her way. She went outside into the Melchah territory and found an arch that was high and she could see what was going on. With little effort, she jumped onto it. She had just ducked her head when they had come. It was one of Kain’s lieutenants, along with some Dumahim vampires and what must have been the one that had gotten away. She had never seen any of the lieutenants before, nor were they ever really spoken of before. She tried to identify the lieutenant, and it smelled of Rahabim. This must have been the great Rahab, the vampire who had the ability to swim the waters of Nosgoth freely without harm. The Dumahim vampire that she had spared seemed to be trying to lead them to where she had met him. Why would a great vampire such as he be trying to find me? Surely I was stronger than fledglings, but not nearly as strong as a lieutenant. She continued to watch, but then to her dismay, Rahab must have smelled her blood because he looked straight at where she was hiding. “Show yourself, vampire!” She feared the worst, but there was nothing she could do. She didn’t wish to anger him by disobeying. As she stood up, he appeared impressed. He seemed to whisper something to a nearby Dumahim as one of them ran off. “So, you’re the one who killed a Melchahim and a Dumahim, eh? Come here so I can get a better look at you.” At this statement, there was no doubt in her mind he was going to get rid of her. Carefully jumping down, she reached the ground and Rahab circled her, apparently looking her over. “You show promise, girl. What’s your name?” “Seacia.” “Seacia hmm?” His smile chilled her to the bone. “Come with me.” Surprised that he wasn’t going to kill her for killing a fellow vampire, she followed without question, but with little knowledge of where they were going. She soon found out. They had reached the place where Kain lived. She was curious and fearful to see how he would react to her, if he even remembered killing her. Soon they had reached the throne room where all of lieutenant were “Stand here.” Rahab ordered. Hot with embarrassment from all of the eyes staring at her, she did as she was told. Kain seemed to appear out of the darkness, and when the two stood in the room, all of them were taken aback with surprise. Seacia and Kain had a stunning resemblance to each other, so much in fact you would think they were father and daughter. Seacia could tell her face was getting redder. “Are you sure this is the one that bumbling Dumahim told us of, Rahab?” Kain asked, not daring to take his eyes off of her. “Yes, Father, the Dumahim confirmed it.” Rahab answered as Kain seemed to inspect her. She didn’t dare ask a question to him. “What is her name?” “She says her name is Seacia.” “Seacia...” He seemed to taste the word as he said it. Then placing a claw under her chin he said, “You’ll have to excuse our rudeness, my dear, but you have the most striking resemblance to me.” Not daring to speak, she affirmed a nod. “Word of a woman vampire has spread fast, you see, and I had to see for myself if this was entirely possible. Bring him in!!” Turning to see what Kain was looking at, she saw a Dumahim vampire being brought in, the one she had killed and another. He was struggling to break free of the grasp of the two vampire holding him. “Did you kill this vampire?” She could only nod. “Then if would, kill the one that had gotten away.” She was surprised that Kain would ask something like that to her, but she obeyed, as a smile crawled upon her face. The chance to show what she made of excited her. Setting up a running position, she thought of something that would be impressive. One...she counted. Kain’s smiled faded as a look of fascination crept upon his face...Two...the vampire she was about to kill was trembling in his place...Three! Getting a good running pace, she clenched up a fist and punched him in the face, sending him flying into the wall. While stilling running, she ran towards him, grabbed his neck and pushed off the ground, sending her up into the air where she threw him towards the ground. But before the vampire reached the ground, Seacia summoned a ball of energy in her hand and threw it at the vampire, disintegrating it into nothing. She landed hard on the ground right where she had started. Kain and the others were amazed at this feat, and so was Seacia. She didn’t even know how she had conjured up that ball of energy at the end. “How did you do that?” Kain demanded. “I-I have no idea...” “You have to know, how else could you have done it, child?” “I d-don’t...” Seacia tried to say as she slipped into unconsciousness. “Seacia...are you alright?” Said Kain. He and his “sons” were gathered around her. “...Huh?” Suddenly realized she was surrounded, she tried to stand up as fast as possible, only to fall back down again. Leeching with pain, she tried not to show it, but Kain read her expression. “Here,” Kain offered. He held out his slit wrist with blood flowing from it. She and the other vampires were extremely surprised that such a powerful vampire such as Kain would do such a thing, but she took his offer. He seemed to have a squirmish look on his face. Not wanting to offend him, she tried not to take much. She stood up with just enough strength to show that she was well again. I really gotta kill a human or two when I get outta here, she thought. “Now then, how did you manage such a feat, Seacia? I’ve never seen anything like it.” To be truthful, she had no idea. But she knew that he didn’t like the answer ‘no’. “I don’t know, really. I didn’t even plan to do something like that.” “That is fine. I’m sure you’ll know, in time. The rest of you are excused.” The lieutenants were shocked. They wanted to know what would happen next, but decided it was best not to upset him, and left. “I would like to offer you an alliance, Seacia.” He had her complete attention. “You would make a power ally to my clans and I’m sure you would be content amongst the other higher-ranking vampires. You need not decide immediately, just think about it.” And he vanished. She was about to agree without one thought, but then thought it wise not to accept so suddenly. She was still confused about many things and needed some answers to questions, such as why Kain would kill a normal human and then ask to have her become a leading vampire amongst his most high-ranking vampires? But first, she needed to feed. She exited the way she came, and had to go past the lieutenants. She suspected they had tried to listen in on her conversation with Kain. Trying not to look at them, she was about to get of the place when one of them placed their hand on her shoulder. “Hold it.” Caught unsurprised by this action, she turned to face the vampire, Zephon. “What are you, really? You must be something else if you were able to do that.” “I am a vampire, and that is all there is to it. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go.” “Oh really now? To where?” “Out.” “Out where?” He didn’t seem too happy at that response. “I don’t know, just to think.” “You can do plenty of thinking here.” “Yes, but this place doesn’t have my answers.” “To what, girl? You’re not really a vampire, are you?! Admit it!” This outraged her. “I am a vampire and you know it, flat-face!” She knew she shouldn’t have called him that, but she couldn’t help it. Many oooh’s and she’s gonna get it’s came from the others. “W-What did you call me?!” “Flat-face, are you deaf?” With that, he tried to punch her face in, but she caught it. “H-How did you do that??” He asked angrily as he tried to pull his hand away. “At this point, I don’t give a damn...and neither should you.” She narrowed her eyes and turned a half-circle, throwing him towards the wall. When he hit it, he left big cracks in the wall and was obviously unconscious. Turning to the others, she said ,”If anyone would like to join him, speak now or forever hold your damned mouth shut.” None of them spoke and they backed up about a hundred steps from her. She then exited the building. Now that she had experienced one of Kain’s lieutenants, she was doubtful of joining him. They didn’t seem to like her as much as Kain did. Wondering where she could find some human to feed upon, she decided it best to head towards the human citadel. She had begun to start heading towards the mountains when a voice from behind stopped her. She spun around to see another one of the lieutenants trying to catch up to her. She didn’t really know them very well by facial features or by the scent of their blood, but she sensed this was Raziel, the most favored of Kain’s sons. “Wait a moment, Seacia. I just wanted to apologize for my brother’s rude behavior. He doesn’t trust newcomers very much.” “You needn’t apologize, Raziel.” She didn’t say anything more and began to walk away from him. “Will you tell me where you’re going?” “Around.” “What do you mean by that?” “Let’s just say I’m looking for answers to questions that you wouldn’t posses. “I see.” And he turned to return to Kain’s crumbling palace. “If you really want to know, Raziel, he asked me to become a lieutenant, like you.” Then she hurriedly went towards the human citadel. He turned to look at her, but she was gone. A lieutenant?! Kain wouldn’t appoint just anyone to that high a rank in such a short time. He decided to see for himself what Kain saw in her. Reaching the short end of her planned journey, she was above the abyss, it’s swirling waters hypnotizing. She could only see two other directions in which to go and she sensed none of them led directly to the human citadel. But she could smell human blood at a distance from her right, and also that of another vampire. She could tell Raziel was following her by how close his scent was, but she thought exposing him wouldn’t be at all fun. So she decided to follow the human scent into Raziel’s territory, her hunger growing stronger by the minute. Why would she be going to my territory? Surely there are no answers there...would there? In Raziel’s territory, she could smell the blood of the Razielim, and the scent of Raziel’s blood more than ever. They willingly let her pass, seeing as they could sense their master was somewhat there. She reached the spot where human blood smelled strongest and spotted a hunter, guarding a sort of entrance. Climbing to a nearby ledge, she concealed herself so that hunter couldn’t spy her from his position. A few seconds after, she leaped out from the ledge and plummeted to hunter. When the hunter finally saw her, it was too late. She was already feeding on his neck and he was dead. Once finished, a strange sensation came over her. It made her dizzy and she began to wobble around as she tried to walk. Soon, darkness began to swallow her vision and she knew what was happening. She then blacked out. She was walking along a street. It wasn’t that of the human citadel, but at the same time, it was the citadel. It was dark, suggesting that it was night, and she was all alone. She then sensed that she wasn’t alone on that dark street. A vampire leapt out of a nearby alley and snatched her right off of her feet. She saw the vampire and knew that it was Kain. But instead of biting her neck, he paused, sniffing her. “The power within you is great, I can tell.“ He said. “But you don’t seem to be able to awaken it in this weak human form, little one. Allow me to assist you and I can help you manifest it, but only if you agree.” Letting her go, she felt the urge to run, but she did not. A great power? In me? Without thinking enough, she nodded, and he killed her. He killed her and turned me into a vampire. He began to drink her blood, and she could feel her spirit leave this place. The last thing she could recall before completely slipping away was Kain slitting his own wrist and letting the blood drip onto her face. “Seacia, Seacia, wake up!” Someone was yelling at her. She opened her eyes to unsurprisingly see Raziel trying to shake her back in consciousness. “Wha-What happened?” “You fell unconscious after feeding. One of my servants found you here and came to get me.” “You needn’t lie to me, Raziel. I knew you were there the entire time.” “How could you have known that?” “I could smell your blood.” He looked half surprised and half satisfied. “I see. What did you dream?” “I dreamt of my past. My human past.” “And what did you see?” “Kain and myself. I agreed to let him kill me and turn me into what I have become.” “Sounds intriguing. You will have to ask the Master about it.” “Perhaps. And perhaps not.” “What do you mean by that?” “What I mean is that the future may hold my answers, not the past.” “Bah, I despise riddles.” Then Raziel began to sway. “Raziel, what’s wrong?” “My...state of transformation...is beginning. I didn’t...think it would begin this...soon...” He had a hard time keeping his balance.“Seacia, get one of my servants...hurry...” He said as he sank to his knees. She ran as fast she could to nearest Razielim that she saw and quickly told him what was happening. With a flick of the Razielim’s hand, he and other Razielim had gathered to where their master now tried to get back up. Having them lean on their shoulders, Seacia watched as Raziel was led to his quarters. As he past her, she could’ve sworn she saw his eyes dart towards her for a brief moment. “Our master is in his state of change. He won’t be emerging for quite some time.” The Razielim told her. “How long?” “Many, many years, Milady.” “Thank you.” And she left the Razielim clan territory towards the Lake of the Dead. She somehow sensed that an answer laid to left of Raziel’s land. Upon reaching the lake, she began to get dizzy again, but she didn’t want to black out in such an open place where humans might discover her. Seeing an etch in the cliff big enough to hide her entirely, she jumped to it just in time. She soon passed out. She dreamt of nothing. If she did, she could not recall what they were. It was a dreamless sleep. Although boring, it was also a bit frightening. There was nothing but blackness all around. But then a light blinded the darkness and she was now awake. It was lightly raining, and the sky was a dull shade of gray. It was night when she had fallen unconscious, and it had been a cloudless sky at the time. She wondered how much time had passed, but ignored it completely when she felt something strange about herself. There was something different, like something had grown from her. She felt a small brushing touch on the side of arm and when she looked at what had touched her, the sight made her gasp. During the time she had “slept”, she had grown a tail! Her mouth gaped open at the sight. I guess the small handful of victims Kain turned into vampires were also given gifts. It was an unusual feeling, it seemed strange that this was now a part of her. She dared to touch it and it gave her a tingling sensation. It seemed to have a mind of its own, but she could somewhat control what it did if she wished to. Through looking over her new “gift”, she decided to ask a Razielim how long it had been. She jumped down and she felt herself slow down and not touch the ground. She was hovering over the ground and she thought that she must have been given the gift of flight as well, but without the need for wings. This gift she was more fascinated with. She tried to control her movements, but it was quite difficult to do. She’d get the hang of it, she thought. Right now, knowing how long she was gone was more important. She headed to the gate that was supposed to keep others out and searched for a Razielim. It wasn’t long before she found one. “Excuse me, but-” “Milady! It’s been so long since our last meeting!” It was the vampire that told what had been going on the other day. “Greetings, old friend. How long has it been?” “About a century. Where have you been?” “Asleep. I think. Has Raziel awoken?” “No, still he sleeps. You were asleep as well?” She explained what had happened and the new gifts that were given to her, exposing the tail she had hid underneath her cloak. “My word, Milady. I’ve ne’er seen such changes before.” He said as he watched her hover in the air. “Yes, and I still haven’t really gotten the hang of flying like this,” she replied as she landed. “Well, you are most welcome to stay here, if you wish.” “No, I still have not accomplished what I left to do.” “Then I shall see you in he future then.” And she turned and left. Now that she was wide awake, she was annoyed to find her hunger swell up in her. She had no time to waste in discovering what lied in the north and decided to postpone a feeding. Thinking she could get there faster by flying, she tried out her newly acquired ability. She could’ve gotten there faster on foot. It was like learning to walk all over again. She practiced a bit, then thinking she had gotten the gist of it, tried to go north. Although she did end up going in that general direction, she somersaulted the entire way. When finally stopped, she felt very sick. She had to rest a moment before she tried again, now heading west. This time she didn’t do one single somersault. In fact, she now knew how to control herself. She found it easiest to push off of an object to get her going. So, pushing off of the nearby mountain which had stopped her somersaulting flight, she glided to a large sundial. She landed and saw that an entry way was open. She entered and made her way down into the Chronoplast. She walked into the center of the room and looked around her. It was an odd contraption. Dials and a most strange-looking object on the ceiling were all that she could see. But then she saw the portal. It was on the third floor of that place, but she reached it fast. She touched it, but it did not hurt. She entered and everything was bright, but not blinding. She then saw things. Visions. Visions of the future. Raziel standing in the middle of Kain’s throne room. He spread out what his change had given him: wings. They were beautiful and he deserved such an honorable gift. Kain then ripped the bones from them, sending Raziel into a world of agony. And then she saw Kain order Raziel to be cast into the Abyss. “Stop it! Stop these visions! No more!” She screamed into emptiness. The last vision she saw was poor Raziel falling to his doom. And then it all faded and she was back in the Chronoplast. No. I will NOT allow Kain to do this to him! He had no right to kill him without good reason and he had done no wrong. Determined to change his fate, Seacia headed out of the Chronoplast, and in pursuit of Kain. “KAIN!!” She yelled as she pushed the vampire guards out of her way. “Don’t you dare! You can’t come here unless the Master, Kain, summons you!” One of the guards said before he was pushed into the nearby water. “I have good reason too be here, fool.” She slammed the gate to the throne room itself open and called out his name once again, but even louder. She saw him there, just lounging on his throne without a care in the world and probably fully aware of what he was going to do to Raziel once he emerged from his sleep. “TRAITOR!!!” She yelled as she leapt for his throat. He, of course, evaded her attack, although narrowly. “Why do you call me a traitor, Seacia? I have done no wrong.” “THAT is where you are wrong, Kain!! I saw what happens in the future when Raziel awakens, you hypocrite!!” She again leapt for where she sensed him, and caught him off guard. Gagging, he tried to speak. “You may have seen what happens, but you know nothing of the reason.” “Yes I do, Kain. You kill him upon jealousy, as you aren’t darkly blest with such a wondrous gift!” She then threw him like a rag doll towards a pillar. Some vampires came in to see what was happening and quickly ran, obviously to inform their masters. “No, foolish girl. That isn’t the reason at all.” “Then what, Kain? What in damned hell could the reason be for killing him?!” “Destiny, Seacia. It is not by my free will that I destroy him. Fate brings me to kill him.” Seacia staggered back, pondering over these words. “Now, leave. If you wish, you can just try to manipulate fate. Raziel will emerge soon and you can see for yourself that we have no choice when the Wheel of Fate turns.” Not knowing what to do or say, she idiotically stood there as Kain’s sons Rahab, Melchah, Zephon, and Turel appeared in the throne room. Thinking that she was going to kill their surrogate father, they attacked her. She realized what was happening, and pushed off of the ground to escape her attackers. Amazed at her new power, they watched as she flew off in the direction Raziel’s province. “No, do not follow her. She merely has misunderstood, and she will learn in time.” Kain said as his sons started to go after her. “This is something that I hope she can learn amongst everything that is to happen.” He whispered to himself. Stumbling out of the chamber and back into the land of Nosgoth, Seacia was drunk with confusion. You can’t control your own destiny? That’s impossible, she argued. Then she decided to take matters into her own hands. If Kain is going to damn Raziel to ageless torment, I’ll be waiting for the correct moment in which to swipe him from his doom. He doesn’t deserve such a wretched fate, and she turned and faced to her destined direction. Remembering Kain’s words about Raziel awakening soon, she rushed to the Abyss. Maybe I can stop him from seeing Kain. When she reached the gate, the nearest Razielim told her that he still was asleep. Deciding to take advantage of the free time it now gave her, she thought it best to perfect her new ability. She soared above the clouds, but always watched carefully at the ground below for any activity. It appeared that she was able to sense movement from great distances as well. Diving towards the ground, it seemed almost impossible to pull up, but she did so, and with grace and agility. It was an incredible feeling to soar above everything. Now assured that her flying would successfully aid her in her planned rescue, she felt compelled to feed. She quickly sniffed the air and headed northwest. She soon found a vulnerable human and quickly fed. She wanted to return as soon as possible. She returned to what looked like chaos. “What has happened??” She asked a nearby Razielim who was scurrying around like a little mouse like the rest of them. “He woke up just minutes after you left!” he said with a small smile on his face and then ran off. Although the Razielim may have been happy, she was not. His fate was about to unfold. She decided to hide in nearby shadows, he might question her if he saw her. She’d able to see all that happened and saw Raziel enter the courtyard. And she saw them. The very things that were to cause Raziel’s demise. His wings. Although elegant and beautiful, from a vampire’s point of view, she knew they would bring death and destruction instead of happiness. He stretched them out, their wing span more than half as long as he was tall. So proud and satisfied with his new gift, she hoped he enjoyed it while it lasted. But instead of heading towards Kain’s headquarters, he flew into the sky. How she was able to gather enough strength to stop herself from joining him, she did not know. She watched him fly around for a bit and land back on the ground. Then he headed for Kain’s domain. This was what she had been waiting for. She followed him all the way to the entrance of Kain’s palace, but didn’t enter. It would be futile to save him there with the other lieutenants around to easily stop her. She grimaced as she heard his cry of agony. Knowing that they were going to bring him to the abyss soon, she carefully hid herself among the rocks, close enough to the edge to catch him and yet be able to see their movements. She was ready when they approached the abyss. “Cast him in!” Kain said. She saw Raziel struggle against his brothers just before they threw him in. That was her cue. She jumped from her hiding place, pushing as hard as she could off of the rocks. He was falling faster than she expected him to. She drew close enough to grab him and caught his ankle. She did it, she had saved Raziel from his fate. But his face was mere inches away from hitting the water. It was difficult to hang onto him. “Raziel, give me your hand,” she said as she was trying to hang on with one hand and reaching out towards him with her other. He seemed to be in pain every time he moved. He reached towards her hand and she had to re-adjust her hold on his ankle, but she got it. Letting go of his ankle, she quickly grabbed his hand with her other hand. “Don’t let go of me, ok Raziel?” He nodded in affirmation. Slowly, she started fly upwards to the platform that rose out of the middle of the abyss. But then her hand started to slip. “Oh damn, I’m losing my grip.” She tried to speed up flying to the platform, but that only made him slip faster. “Give me your other hand.” She feared for a moment that she might totally drop him, but she grabbed his other hand quickly enough that she didn’t. She again slowly rose to the platform, and was suddenly struck by a sharp object when she reached the top. Kain had apparently known what she was going to do and had left Dumah there to kill her if she succeeded. He had pierced her through her heart with a spear. Instead of dying instantly or within a few seconds, the surprise attack had frozen her in place with fear. Though she then began to slowly fall, her hands never let go of Raziel’s. Seeing what had happened, he tried to stop himself by digging his claws into the small ground which was the only structure for the platform, but unsuccessfully. Desperately, he pulled the spear out of Seacia’s lifeless body. She was brought back to consciousness too late. They both burned in agony, the acidic water slowly eating away their flesh. Now she knew that Kain was right. You can’t change your fate, but, was it her destiny to plummet into this burning hell after failing to save Raziel? As her mind was ripped from her, she knew she would have to take this agony, and wait. |
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