Mark/Ryouga sighed a deep, dark, depressed, sorrowful sigh. As he perched on the back of a bench outside the Aud Lob, alone, in the harsh wintery winds, his aura began glowing a bright blue as he focused on the events of the past few days. Yeah, it had been one of THOSE weeks.

It wasn’t bad enough that he had lost to Ranma....again. It wasn’t even enough that he had lost through bad luck, when he was on the verge of victory--oh, not Ryouga. That would be too easy. He had to lose in the most humiliating way possible; being turned into a little black piglet in front of a good portion of the school. And then had been publically repudated by Anne/Akane. And then, been ostracized by a lot of those spectators, after P-chan’s previous ‘habits’ had been spread around the school.....not for the first time, Mark cursed the luck that had had Nabiki Bond with a former friend, Helen Jonas.

And now, it was something akin to the straw that broke the camel’s back. Normally, Jeff and Anne embracing (as usual; they had been dating for over a year) would have been a slight emotional slap to Mark. But when you added in the fact that Mark was Ryouga, Anne was Akane, and Jeff was a very happy Ranma, it created only one thing: an ideal Shi Shi Hokodan training situation.

Without a single sound, he leapt into the air, bouncing off the walls in a pattern to make any Olympic gymnast turn bright green with envy. He landed lightly on the roof, a sapphire depression aura flaring up around him, bathing the area in a surreal blue glow. Two stories below and inside the building, Ranma looked up for a second.

“Oh, shit. This is bad.”

“Huh?” Anne/Akane looked up at her boyfriend. “What are you talking about?”

“I think Ryouga’s about to blow something up. I just hope it’s not the school....”

Meanwhile, back on the roof, Mark focused his depression into a single point between his hands, a ball of bright blue light growing there ominously. He kept concentrating on the single fact of how much he hated his life, and how it apparently hated him.

“Shi...SHI....HOKODAAAAN!!!!!!!”

*FWOOOOM*

The blast of chi shot out across the road, heading off into infinity....until an unfortunate, innocent, and (thankfully) unoccupied house volunteered to stop it by sacrificing itself. One could almost hear the cash registers of the area’s contractors gleefully ringing as the roof collapsed in on itself, reducing the house to a pitiful little pile of bricks and wood.

“Aw, man....” Mark/Ryouga muttered as he collapsed from the chi drain, “I really hope that I don’t have to pay for that....”

“Oh, Mark....” Mark groaned once again as the smirking visage of Helen Jonas appeared above his face. “I’m sorry. Did you just confess to doing some major property damage? I didn’t quite hear you....but I think that the tape recorder probably picked.... it...up--Gaaah!!” Helen stood straight up and shook her head violently. Mark/Ryouga propped himself up on his elbows and gave her a very confused look. “Sorry, Mark. Apparently I don’t have quite as much control over Nabiki as I’d like at times. No one hears about any gratuitious property damage from us.”

“Um, thanks.”

“Don’t mention it...ever.” Nabiki’s sharklike grin reappeared on Helen’s face. “After all, I do have a reputation to protect.” With that, she climbed down the access ladder and ducked back into the school building via a second story window.

*Is it just me, or do things just keep getting crazier and crazier the longer I exist?* Ryouga asked rhetorically.

“I don’t know. And I don’t really WANT to know.” Mark replied.

*Good call.* With that, he pushed himself up off the ground....and then froze. Something many people don’t know of is the martial artist’s danger sense. Master martial artists are often capable of sensing a threat before it actually appears. And for someone like Ryouga who had spent years in Nerima, or Mark, who had spent over 2 years in a gifted/talented high school, this talent is overdeveloped to the point of ludicrousness. Now, it was going off full blast.

“Good GOD! What the hell is going on?”

*I have no--* Ryouga paused as a battle cry rang out from below.

“Ranma! Wo da Airen!!!”

Mark and Ryouga, despite sharing a single body, somehow managed to share a mildly worried/exasperated look.

“Shampoo. Great.” Mark sighed. “Well, at least we might get a bit of entertainment out of this, right?” He leapt off the roof and landed gracefully forty feet below, then quickly headed inside to see what he could do. However, he completely failed to notice the pissed-off bird that had just perched on a nearby tree limb. This was especially odd considering that most ducks had already migrated south by this time of year.

“You know,” Anne/Akane remarked, “it’s nice how everything is really working out, isn’t it?”

Ranma stiffened in horror. “Oh, great. Now that you’ve said that, things can only get worse.”

“What?! Ranma no--” Akane was cut off in mid-mallet by a not-so-ancient Jouketsou rallying cry.

“Ranma! Wo da airen!!” Jeff/Ranma froze as Leslie Johnson, obviously Bonded with and being controlled by the purple haired Amazon Shampoo, glomped him in an expert manner. Anne/Akane turned red with fury and began summoning up power for a Mallet of Death strike. Shampoo ignored her and continued glomping. Jeff/Ranma continued turning blue from oxygen deprivation and began seriously considering moving back to Japan, where no one else could find him for a while.

“Let go of my Ranma, you, you....Amazon BIMBO!!!” Akane screamed angrily. Shampoo whirled just in time to catch a mallet upside her head. As she was sent flying through one of the doors, Mark walked in through the one next to hers and stood by Helen/Nabiki.

“Odds?”

“Hmmph,” Nabiki muttered. “I’d set them at 5:1 against my little sister. Shampoo’s got experience going for her. But 3:1 when Ranma steps in to help, and 2:1 that he’ll recover from the Death Glomp quickly enough to help, period.”

“Great. Thanks.”

“Why did you want them?” Nabiki quickly asked.

“Just curious, that’s all,” Mark waved back as he (along with several other spectators) followed a righteously pissed Akane outside.

*So what are we going to do?* Ryouga asked anxiously.

At the moment? Nothing.: Mark replied. But if things go bad, we’re stepping in.:

*WHAAAT?! WE ARE HELPING AKANE!!!* Ryouga bellowed angrily. Mark winced at the mental noise.

:No, we AREN’T! Dammit, Anne has ALWAYS gotten pissed when someone else fights for her, and Akane is the same way! Frankly, I don’t need EVERYONE to be angry with me right now. BUT, if it looks bleak, then we make our move. And before you protest, let’s just remember whose body this is and who has more control over it at this point, OK?!: Ryouga began sulking while Mark turned his attention back to the battle.

“Stupid Violent Girl!” Shampoo cried. “Leave Shampoo and Airen alone!”

“No chance, bitch!” Akane screamed in reply. “Why don’t you just go and get some language lessons! Maybe then you won’t sound as stupid as you act!!” Various “oooh”’s were heard from the crowd at this diss. Shampoo growled in fury.

“DIE!!” Shampoo charged, swinging her bonbori in a complex pattern while Akane dodged the concrete balls by narrow margins.

“ANNE!” Jeff cried as he dashed out the door. “I’m com--OOF!!” The ‘OOF’, for posterity’s sake, was caused as Mark stuck out his arm, catching Jeff/Ranma right in the stomach and knocking the wind out of the teenaged martial artist. “Dammit, Pig-Boy! Let me through!!”

“Sorry, Jeff,” Mark apologized. “But no can do.”

“Why the HELL not?!!”

“I figure that we should let Akane try handling this--DUCK!” Both martial artists ducked down as a flying bonbori went screaming through the air to smash against a brick wall. “But, if things get out of hand...you grab Akane. I’ll stall the Amazon.” Ranma looked up to see that Mark/Ryouga was determined, and was not going to swayed from his chosen course of action.

“Fine, fine. But I decide when things get out of hand.”

“Fine by me.”

“YAAAAHHH!!!!” Akane was sent flying through the air via a powerful blow from Shampoo, and slammed hard into the side of the school. She slowly got to her feet, only to be lifted into the air by her enemy. A powerful punch connected with a meaty *THWOCK*, and Anne’s head sagged. Shampoo grinned as she prepared to send this ..._obstacle_ into the next life.

“NOW!!!” The Amazon-possessed student turned just as a _really_ pissed-off Mark/Ryouga to punch her in the face. She staggered for a second; just enough time for Ranma to leap past her and snag the dangling Anne/Akane from her grasp. Shampoo shook her head, and the three Marks resolved into one image, battle aura flaring red with rage.

“YAAAHHH!!!!!” Mark charged her with a wordless battle cry, allowing Ryouga’s berserker rage to control his actions. He connected with a solid punch to the jaw, only to get nailed with a quick jab to the stomach. The two combatants glared at each other, then charged again, exchanging blows powerful enough to shatter concrete.

After a few minutes, both Mark/Ryouga and Leslie/Shampoo were gasping for breath, bruised and bleeding in multiple locations. ::God, this is tougher than I thought it would be.:: Mark thought to himself.

*Yeah, well, the Bakusai Tenketsu is a physical thing,* Ryouga replied. *If you want that toughness, we’re going to have to do it the hard way.*

::Shit....::Mark winced, contemplating being struck with a two-ton boulder, over and over again. He refocused his attention on the battle as Shampoo readied herself for another charge. Suddenly, Mark was slammed against a wall. Pushing off for another charge, he quickly found that his limbs weren’t moving at all. He looked down to see himself restrained by two chains, some Silly Putty, a yo-yo, and what was apparently half a roll of duct tape.

“Sorry, Ryouga,” Brian Thompson called out, Mousse's instincts causing him to push a pair of non-existent glasses back up on his nose, “but I’M finishing this fight.” Mark glared as the new and improved Mousse leapt forward, allowing him to fall flat on his face as the restraints were released.

“OW! Goddamn duck....” With that, Mark stumbled over towards the crowd, avoiding the barrage of weapons flying out of Brian/Mousse's sleeves. "How's Anne?" he asked Adam/Tofu, watching his friend check over the unconscious girl.

"I think she'll be all right," the 'doctor' replied, looking up for a moment. "There doesn't seem to be any permanent damage. Some bruising, sure, but not much else."

"Thank God," Mark breathed. The lost boy turned his attention back to the battle, only to see a woozy Brian/Mousse lying on the ground, stunned. Above him stood Shampoo, looking like a statue of some avenging goddess of wrath, about to bludgeon him with her remaining bonbori. As she brought the mace down, though, she stopped barely halfway through the arc. Her arms trembled as beads of sweat stood out on her face. Mark/Ryouga watched in confusion, along with the rest of the crowd. "What's happening?" he asked in confusion.

"Could it be...." Tofu trailed off behind him. Mark/Ryouga quickly turned to face his friend.

"What?! What is it?!!!"

"Before," Lawrence/Tofu started, "that was Shampoo out there, and there was no sign of Leslie's aura. In short, Shampoo was possessing Leslie's body. But now, their auras are mixing....I think that Leslie's fighting back against Shampoo, to try and regain control of the body."

As Shampoo struggled with Leslie, Brian's eyes narrowed. Without warning, he shot both legs forward, sending Leslie/Shampoo flying through the air.