*Disclaimer: White white white! Ugh! All
we ever see is that color! What's up with
that? I mean, as much as I love that
color - why don't they add something more
to it...like...RED! Or a Mamo-chan! That'd
be nice! But hmmm...Or black...kinda like
those pretty little pictures of Sailor
Moon the guy in the coat wears...you know,
the one that looks like Sailor Moon is
drawn by spilled black ink...

Brush up against me
Feel the heat
Let it capture your heart and soul
See only what you want to see
And let me hope that it would be me
And only me

Touch the sands of time
Freeze this very moment
Let it last for all eternity
For if we let it slip away from our hands
We may never re-live such a moment
Ever Again

Close your beautiful eyes
Don't watch the moment become lost
And the tears the fall from my eyes
Just remember that once we had each other
Even if it was just
A mirage

Desert Mirage
Chapter 7
By: Eternal Angel and The Rose Society
Rating: R
Email: stargazing12@hotmail.com
	EtrlSlrMn@aol.com
http://www.steelpenguin.com/~fromangeltofoes/
http://www.geocities.com/the_rose_society/


	Morning arose as the bright sun
graced the sky with its presence, bringing a
multitude of colors into the desert sky.
Endymion arose with the sun, just as
captivating, just as beautiful. He woke up
with the strangest feeling of contentment
traveling throughout his body, pulsing from
the deepest depths his heart. Smiling, he
rolled over to gaze at Serenity.

	God she was beautiful. Never had any
of his former lovers ever aroused such a deep
feeling of admiration from him. Usually, after
he had amused himself, he dismissed the girl,
heedless of her hurt expression. He had no
desire to lay next to someone if there was no
pleasure to be had. Yet, last night, something
within him wanted to prolong the moment, as if
he were afraid to lose it. He had drew her
heated body to his own, letting his siren
snuggle upon his bare chest. He had wound his
hand in her hair, letting the silver threads
travel across his skin as he drifted off to
sleep. Now awake, he watched as Serenity
slept, oblivious to his observations.

	The early morning sun danced across
her skin, casting it with a rosy hue. Her
glorious blue eyes, so dark with desire the
night before, were lidded now, closed in
sleep. She clutched the covers to her bare
body, even in sleep, as if her innocence and
innate modesty, despite her previous
circumstances, forbid her to lay naked in
a man's presence. He ran a finger along her
shoulder, smiling when she drew away without
waking, a slight frown on her face.

	Indeed, Serenity was not like any of
his former mistresses. Somehow, there was an
intangible quality about her, something that
kept Endymion from growing bored with her
antics. He had had women who were well-skilled
in the art of seduction; yet, next to Serenity,
they paled in comparison. She had captivated
him with her mere gaze, a feat never
accomplished before. However, despite the fact
that she basically pulsed with sexuality, she
didn't notice it. That very fact made her all
the more appealing to Endymion. He had grown
tired of women who were no better than whores.
All the women he had been with, virgin or not,
were calculating and conniving, determined to
get his attention and his riches. But Serenity
was honest and pure, above trickery and lies.

	'Yes,' Endymion thought as he put his
head upon the same pillow as Serenity. 'She
is a woman worthy of my time and interest.
She has known how dark life can be and yet
has not allowed its darkness to mar her
spirit. She is a woman that I can spend time
with and enjoy her conversation. She is a
woman that I can see myself keeping around
for awhile. She is a woman that I can love.'

	Endymion blinked in surprise. What
was that last word? Love? He furrowed his
brow. Love. Had he truly thought that
forbidden word?

	Love...

	A word that he was taught to scorn,
to abhor? A word he had been told that would
never do any good for him. He could already
see his father's eyes glaring at him for ever
thinking of such an useless word.

	"Love is for fools Endymion." His
father had told him when he was a young boy
of age seven. "And no son of the Sultan shall
be a fool. To love is to show weakness, and
weakness will only lead to two things: your
destruction and the destruction of our kingdom.
Our family has been ruling over this
flourishing land for so long - our strength has
made this kingdom grow and expand..."

	 "Our family line has always been stable
and strong - and I will not have a son of mine
be a weak link, falling into such a cursed trap
of silly emotions that bring only destruction..."

	But wasn't that what he set himself up
as right now, a weak ruler? With his thoughts of
'love' and forever more? Women, his father once
stated, were just here for one's pleasure. They
were never to be thought of as anything more.
Marriage to a woman was not for love, but for
the duty of producing an heir and maintaining
the strength of the kingdom.

	Duty before pleasure.

	He stared at his blonde sprite.

	Duty...

	He slipped out of the bed.

	Before...

	He paused at the door, his eyes
lingering at the beautiful frame.

	Pleasure...

	He closed the door softly, leaving behind
the most wonderful thing that ever happened in
his life.



	He thought of letting her go.

	He truly did, but that feat seemed
impossible when he imagined another man holding
her, touching her, caressing her...knowing her as
intimately as he did.

	The thought made everything inside of him
build up in a dazzling display of jealousy that
spun a web of anger around him.

	No, he could not, would not let her go.

	But, he had to, did he not? She had
already caused him to feel as if she were vital
to his happiness. If Endymion continued to allow
her to be near him, he would grow so attached
that he would actually neglect his duties to be
with her, to please her. He shuddered. What would
become of his kingdom then? It would shrivel and
perish, lost amongst the swirling sands. His
legacy to his people would be one of destruction
and mediocrity.

	He felt as if he were being pulled in two
directions. One was to be rid of Serenity and be
done with the whole affair while the other was to
keep her close to him, no matter what the
consequences. Endymion sighed. He had never had
this much trouble with one of his women before.
If they required, he would provide them with
adequate money and a small place to live. That
way, they would want for nothing and he would not
be bothered by their clinging and nagging.

	Suddenly, the perfect solution came to
mind. Endymion smiled. It was ideal because it
would keep Serenity close enough so that he might
keep his rendezvous but far away enough so that
he would fall deeper into his infatuation. After
all, that was all that he felt for her, an intense
physical attraction and nothing more. He was
Sultan, the ruler of thousands. He would be
strong. He had no need for such weaknesses, like
love and other such idiotic things. Calling his
servants, he put his plan into action.



	Slowly, Serenity returned to consciousness,
her closed eyes registering that the sun had indeed
risen and was mocking her with its brightness. With
a groan, she stretched her body, taking the kinks
out of her muscles. When she opened her eyes, she
finally registered her nakedness.  She could feel
her body turn pink with that as she clutched onto
the discarded covers to her body, hoping to conceal
what was already been exposed for so long.

	Popping open an eye, she peeked at her
surroundings, making sure that no one had seen her
so...au naturale. With a sigh of relief, Serenity
found herself quite alone and quickly dressed. Once
every hair was back in place, every article clothing
snugly in place, her harried mind finally recalled
the events of the night before. And what she
recalled made Serenity want to return back under
the covers and forget that the whole thing had ever
happened.

	What had possessed her last night? One
minute she and Endymion were fighting like there
was no tomorrow, and then she and him were...
were...Serenity blushed. She supposed the turning
point was when he said that he understood and kissed
her in such a tender manner. That one action had
convinced her that he indeed understand, that he
understood that her and Kunzite's loneliness had
drew them to each other, had made them crave
intimacy. He understood why Kunzite had a special
place in her heart, that he had been her first
shelter from the harshness of the world.

	But...

	Why was it that it wasn't Kunzite's arms
she had found completion in, but Endymion? A man
that seemed to under stand her with such completion
that it frightened her. She knew that her
relationship with Kunzite always had a certain
barrier that she tried so hard to ignore. A barrier
that seemed to have vanish completely when she was
with Endymion. A man she barely knew but then
again knew...

	It was strange and complicated matter that
she couldn't understand...that she shouldn't try
to understand. All she knew was that within the arms
of Endymion, she was able to forget her loneliness
a loneliness that once served as a barrier and...

	Serenity bit her lip. All her remaining
barriers had fallen last night. Endymion had already
held her heart and last night, he held her soul. The
joining of their bodies was only secondary to the
joining of their minds, their hearts, their very
beings. But did Endymion feel the same way? Feel the
same way? Did he feel their hearts slowly join? How
their longings seemed to finally come to an end?
How now, as they were apart, they could feel so
uncompleted, so desperate for the other half?

	Serenity frowned. Surely he did. He
understood her, in a way no one had ever been able
to. Such an understanding required a deep connection
between the two parties. He had shared his own
dreams with her, dreams for his kingdom, for the
future. He had shared his childhood with her, how
distant his father was, how strict an upbringing he
had, and how his oldest advisor was like the father
that he never had. Serenity smiled, reassured that
Endymion did indeed feel the same way she did.

	Suddenly, the door to the room opened,
rousing Serenity from her musings. "Endym-" she
began before she noticed that it was not him at
the door. Instead, there stood a female servant,
one Serenity recognized as the one that had brought
her food the day before. Smiling, Serenity greeted
the girl cheerfully. However, the servant didn't
return her greeting. In fact, she looked rather
sad, wringing her hands in nervousness. "What's
wrong," asked Serenity, laying a hand on the
trembling girl's shoulder.

	"I have orders from his highness, miss,"
replied the girl in a soft voice. She wrung her
hands again. She had just met Serenity the day
before and had liked the older girl immediately,
Serenity's kindness and friendly manner a vast
improvement from the Sultan's past paramours. She
knew that what the Sultan had planned for Serenity
was going to crush the fragile woman before her.
But orders were orders and it would be her head if
she disobeyed her ruler. She continued, "He has
ordered that you are to be promptly removed from
this room and placed in another room, in another
wing of the palace." Pausing, she looked at
Serenity's look of confusion and prayed that
Serenity would forgive her for what she was about
to say next. "Miss, you are to be placed in the
room meant for his highness' favorite mistress."

	Mistress...

	The word taunted her as she stood there,
shocked at the raw intensity of it as it hit her
like a slap upon her face.

	She stared at the servant girl blankly,
willing her to say she lied, to say she didn't
mean it...

	She searched the servant's eyes, but
those same deep bronze eyes stared at her with
no pretence. Maybe...maybe...this was a dream.
No, not a dream, but a nightmare...a hideous
nightmare that was not real. It *couldn't* be
real! Not after all that had happen, all that
they felt for each other...

	She LOVED him!

	She loved him so much, understood him
so well that she knew that he did love her!
This wasn't possible! Her being moved into that
room...wouldn't that mean...didn't that mean
that his affections for her were only that to
a...to a...

	...whore...

	"OH NO, miss," cried the servant. In
her shock, Serenity had spoken her thoughts
aloud. The servant quickly moved to get
Serenity a seat before she fainted on the spot.
"I am sure that his highness meant no such
thing." But in her heart of hearts, the servant
knew the truth. His highness, once he had
gotten what he wanted from a woman, always
discarded her promptly afterwards, saying that
he no longer found her interesting. Even if the
mistress had been able to hold his interest for
longer than the initial tryst, she would
inevitably be moved to the harem. But the girl
did not have the heart to tell this to Serenity.
It was obvious that the young woman loved
Endymion. And it had seemed that he had loved
her in return. After all, he had kept her close
to him at all times, even during his meetings.
However, his actions now implied something else.

	Shaking her head, the servant gently
led the still Serenity to her new room. It
pained her to see such innocence destroyed.
And it angered her when she thought of how his
highness had fooled Serenity, fooled everyone,
into thinking that he felt more for the young
woman than lust.



	Serenity re-read the note that Endymion
had sent with her meal. In no uncertain terms,
it informed her of her exact standing with the
Sultan. He wrote that she would no longer be
required to accompany him to his meetings nor
would he be able to send for her as often as he
used to, since he would be occupied with the
affairs of state. He had sent beautiful outfits
and gorgeous jewels, saying that they were gifts
of his esteem. Serenity laughed bitterly. Esteem
her foot. Those were bribes, baubles he sent her
because he had tired of her. He would now "send"
for her when he had time, expecting her to sleep
with him and then return to this god-forsaken
place like a common tramp. The gifts were payment
for her services.

	By God, she was a fool. She had been
stupid enough to trick herself into believing
that Endymion had loved her, that he actually
cared for her. All his kind words, his caresses,
they were merely a ploy to get her into his bed.
And it had worked. Every look, every touch,
every word, Serenity had taken each little tidbit
and stored them in her lonely heart, mistaking
the fake for true feelings. She had fallen for
him, blindly, heedless of the dangers. She had
loved again, and foolishly, and had ended up
hurt, just like the last time.

	And now, where was she? Not even left
with the knowledge that Endymion had truly cared
for her. At least with Kunzite's death, she knew
that he cared for her as much as he was capable
of. But in Endymion's heart, she was nothing. Was
the bastard even capable of love? Serenity shook
her head. Why should she even think about him?
She should think about herself now and what was
she going to do. Would she sit there and calmly
let herself become the Sultan's concubine? She
touched the piles of jewels and clothes on her
new bed. It would be a pleasant and comfortable
life, filled with good food, fine clothes, and
jewels. Now that she was a part of the harem,
she had the freedom to come and go as she
pleased. Not longer would she be kept a prisoner
in the palace. And if she stayed, she would be
close to Endymion...

	Endymion...

	Enraged, Serenity threw the jewels off
her bed, scattering them like drops of rain upon
the ground. Screaming, she gathered the fine
outfits of silk and ripped them with her bare
hands. Upturning the table, she watched as the
fine dishes of food broke upon the ground. She
ran around the room, breaking everything she
could get her hands on. Finally, spent and
exhausted, she fell to the floor, sobbing.
Everything around her was broken to pieces, just
like her heart and her pride.

	'Have I fallen so low, that I would
consent to be a whore,' Serenity thought. 'Have
I truly fallen so low?' Tightening her jaw,
Serenity stood, dashing the tears from her eyes.
'NO. My father left and I still lived. The old
man beat me and humiliated me, and yet I
continued. Kunzite died but I lived on. I will
NOT be beaten and broken.' Serenity quickly
sprang in to action. She cleaned the room as best
as she could, not wanting the servants to have to
deal with her mess. She put all the gifts that
Endymion had sent her back on the bed, in as neat
piles as she could. Wearing the clothes that she
had come to the palace in and carrying only her
sack of meager belongings that truly belonged to
her, she surveyed the room.

	'Everything that Endymion has ever given
me, I have returned. The few items of value that
I have, plus all my money that I have saved over
the years should cover the money that he paid
the old man. My dancing for all those nights
should cover the room and board he provided. I
am no longer beholden to him. My ties with
Endymion and this place are severed, now and
forever.' Squaring her shoulders, Serenity
lifted her head and took a deep breath. She
felt no loss, no emotions of leaving this
beautiful palace.  All she felt was regret.

	Her regret for loving him...

	Her regret for still loving him...

	And her regret that she would always
love him...

	But what did that matter?  In the end
he didn't love her, so what was the use to
holding onto the attainable?

	With a shake of her head, she left the
palace.

	No second looks.

	No goodbyes.

	Just a single thought.

	She will survive.


Author Notes:

CP: So sorry it took so long to write this!
We both been very busy! And all those people
who were kind enough to email us and demand
the next chapter - thank you for being so
very patient and accepting my "hopefully soon"
replies...(coughs) even though hopefully soon
ended up to be not so very soon - but hey,
perfection has a limit...hehe...(winks) send
more emails and if you can, join my super
cool mailing list:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/dyingscarlet/.
Ja!

RS: ::sigh:: Summer is here and you'd figure
that I'd have more time to write. BUT NO! As
soon as I come home, my mom drags me out to
run errands with her. 100 degree weather, evil
sun, evil traffic, evil allergies...sucks to
be me! But I will try to write more, at least
until me and CP leave for vacation ^^;