Disclaimer Stargate Sg-1 and its characters are the property of Stargate (II) Productions, Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. This story is for entertainment purposes only and no money exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author. This story may not be posted elsewhere without the consent of the author.

"Because we're about to be rescued," Jack said, never so glad to see a teltac in his life. The craft swooped over head and he bit back a grin as he recognized the maneuver. Teal'c was flying…he'd recognize the man's style anywhere.

"Oh, that's nice," Harry drawled.

"Isn't it?"

"I can't go back. I'd rather die here than spend the rest of my life in jail," Harry said dejectedly.

"Yeah…umm, I've been giving that some thought," Jack said, underplaying the idea. Actually he'd thought about little else. Planning how to deal with Harry when they were rescued was one of the things that had kept him sane the past few weeks. "I think you've suffered enough. Hell, I even got to shoot ya," he joked.

"Twice," Harry said, playing along, falling into the banter that had been so familiar, the banter that had been missing the last couple of weeks.

"I think the Tok'ra should be able to find a nice planet for you," Jack said, enjoying the relieved look that passed over Harry's dirty face.

"Thanks, Jack."

"Sure, Harry. Sure." Jack lurched to his feet or more accurately foot and turned to face the teltac. He may be getting rescued, but he was going to do it standing up not sitting on his ass. The door opened and Teal'c walked out, followed by Carter and a Tok'ra that looked familiar, although Jack couldn't quite pull out the man's name. "Stay," Jack ordered Harry, although he knew the man really didn't have the strength right now to go anywhere. "Hey kids, nice of you to join us," he called out, struggling not to limp too much.

"O'Neill," Teal'c said, smiling as widely as Jack had ever seen him smile.

"Colonel." Carter hurried forward. "You're hurt."

"I'll live." Jack waved her off. "You bring a first aid kit?"

"Yes, sir. Of course." She turned. "Teal'c?" The Jaffa spun on his heel, striding back into the teltac. "You should sit down, sir." She moved to pull his arm over her shoulder, presumably to help him sit.

Jack shook her off, awkwardly stepping back. "I'm fine, take care of Harry," he ordered.

"Colonel?" She looked at the man lying on the ground, the pleased expression sliding off her face faster than water drops dancing on a hot griddle.

"He's worse than I am. He's been shot."

"Twice," Harry complained.

Jack jerked his head, perching on a tree stump. "Go," he ordered as Teal'c returned with the first aid kit. She reluctantly took the bag from Teal'c and walked over to Harry. He'd seen her more eager the last time Doc had pressed for full physicals for everyone.

Satisfied that the injured man was in capable hands, and remembering a couple of things he wanted to take back, Jack levered himself up from the stump, limping over to his 'house'.

"O'Neill?" Teal'c called.

"I just gotta get a couple of things. Be right back," Jack called over his shoulder. He made his way into the shell of the home, pushing aside the tattered rag that was the door.

Moving as quickly as his leg would allow, he shoved his meager belongings into his pack, making sure to take the book with him. Maybe Jonas could finish translating it…if nothing else; it was a good example of Furling writing.

Taking one last look, the slung his pack over his shoulder, his boots, tied together by their laces, dangling from one hand. He limped back out into the clearing, pausing for a moment to grab some of the plant. Technically, he should let Carter gather it, but at the moment he didn't care about technicalities. All he really wanted was to get off this planet, take a shower and get his hands on some drugs. Any drugs…hell, a couple of aspirin would do wonders right about now.

"Ow! That hurts," he heard Harry complain as he hung his boots on the branches of a small tree.

"Oh, sorry. That does sting doesn't it?" Carter asked sweetly.

"Damn right it hurts," Harry said.

"This substance is most effective at preventing infections," Teal'c said.

"Exactly," she agreed, reaching out and taking a large bandage from Teal'c. "Wouldn't want you do die now would we?"

"Ah, Major, I didn't know you cared," Harry drawled.

"I don't," she said coldly, shocking Jack a bit. Guess she hadn't quite forgiven Harry for shooting her yet.

"It would indeed, be quite inefficient if your execution were delayed due to your ill health," Teal'c said.

"There won't be any executions," Jack said, moving to stand beside his teammates.

"Colonel?" Carter spun so quickly she nearly lost her balance.

"You can't execute the dead, Carter," Jack said. "And Harry there is the walking…laying dead."

"I don't understand, sir."

"Harry's not coming back with us."

Sam got to her feet, the bandages forgotten in her gloved hands. "Sir, we have orders from General Hammond. Presuming the two of you were… alive, Maybourne was to be taken into custody."

"You can't arrest the dead," Jack insisted.

"Colonel…"

"Carter," he interrupted. "I promised. Anyway, that's all he ever wanted, someplace to retire. I just…got in the way."

She opened her mouth to protest, then shut it, pursing her lips in a way that told him she was biting her tongue. "Yes, sir," she muttered, turning back to her task. She finished in a few minutes, silently signaling for Teal'c and the Tok'ra to give Harry a hand getting to the teltac. "Would you like me to take care of your leg now, sir," she asked, stripping off her soiled gloves. She looked down, deliberately not meeting his eyes, a gesture that confirmed to him that she was not at all happy with his decision.

He sighed, suddenly too tired to argue the matter at the moment. "I don't suppose your friend has a healing thingie with him?"

She frowned, looking up. "Jalen? I don't know."

"Well," he reached out, laying his arm across her shoulder. "Let's ask him. Then let's get the hell out of here."

She grabbed his hand with hers, wrapping her other arm around his waist. Silently, she helped him into the teltac, neither of them looking back.

<><><><><>

"It doesn't mean I have to like it," Jack heard Carter say as he walked past her lab. She and Teal'c were both in the room, her sitting on her stool and him seated cross legged on the floor, some candles set out before him.

Ok, add something else to the 'what's changed' list. Since when did Teal'c meditate with an audience? And since when did Carter allow candles into her lab? She'd complained once that even a small amount of smoke could mess up her doohickeys.

"There you are," her said, frowning at the startled look on her face. Whatever they'd been talking about, they hadn't wanted to be heard. Tough, they shoulda shut the door then.

"Colonel."

"O'Neill."

He walked into the room, leaning against the high table.

"Janet released you?"

"Yep. She drew all the blood she could find, plus other bodily fluids I will not go into." He hopped up on her spare stool, ignoring the look the two of them shared. "Evidentially Jalen knew what he was doing," he continued, patting his now healed leg. "Doc says it's as good as new."

"That's nice to hear, sir," she replied politely.

"Indeed, O'Neill." Teal'c got gracefully to his feet and moved to stand at Carter's side, taking an almost protective stance. They fell into an uncomfortable silence and Jack shoved his hands into his pocket, his fingers running across a small plastic bag.

"I almost forgot," he said, pulling the bag out of his pocket. "It's for you." He held it out to Sam who took it gingerly between two fingers.

"Thanks…you…shouldn't have," she muttered, holding the bag up to study it. "Killer lettuce?" she asked, reading the label.

"Some plant. It was all over the planet. Harry said it tasted like arugela," he explained. She made a face flipping the bag over in her hands. "It's got some kind of hallucinogenic properties. Paranoia inducing too. That's the reason everyone was dead."

"Irrational fear can be a most formidable weapon," Teal'c said, taking the bag from Sam's hand. Jack met his gaze and cocked his head slightly, motioning towards the door. The Jaffa nodded slightly, getting the silent message. "I believe Doctor Fraiser would be most interested in this substance," he said, neatly dodging Sam's hand as she reached for the sample.

She frowned and stared after him for a second before sliding off the stool. "I should probably go and help."

"It's a plant. I think the doc can handle it," Jack said, reaching out and grabbing her hand.
"What's going on with you two anyway?"

"Excuse me?"

"You and Teal'c," he said. "You two've been playing me and my shadow since the planet."

"I don't know what you're talking about," she said, full of mock innocence.

"Right," he said skeptically, shaking his head. "Look, I have not had anything to eat but fish and psycho salad for the last month. Wanna go get something?"

She shook her head, taking a step back. "Umm, thanks but I aah…should probably go help Janet with that plant and…"

"You're not still pissed about Maybourne, are you?" he asked, abruptly changing the subject.

"It doesn't matter. What's done is done," she said.

"I think it does matter," he said.

She looked away for a second, apparently collecting her thoughts. "Sir, you gave an order, and other than my personal feelings, I didn't have a reason NOT to follow it."

Jack shook his head. "I didn't give an order. It wasn't my mission, it was yours. I was just…the mission objective. I mean, hell, I think technically, I'm still MIA. As far as the Air Force is concerned, I don't exist yet. Not until Hammond tells them in triplicate that you bailed my ass out…again." Instead of laughing like he'd hoped, she instead turned away, fiddling with one of her blinky machines. "Carter?"

"If I'd have been paying attention in the first place, none of this would have happened," she said softly, sighing as she turned around. "I'm sorry, sir. I…I was stupid letting him get my zat. I didn't even stop to think before I…"

"Aah," he interrupted. "Stop. He played both of us. There was no weapons cache, no secret supplies. This whole thing was a set-up from the beginning. All Harry wanted to do was get off-world and retire somewhere that didn't have the death penalty hanging over his head."

"It was all a scam?"

"Yeah. He thought he found some alien Utopia, and short of trying to hijack the X-303, we were his only way to get there. Means to an end."

"So that makes everything he did ok?" she asked, her disdain of the man clear in her voice.

He opened his mouth, then closed it and sighed. "No," he grudgingly admitted. "It just means I understand what he did, and why he did it." She rolled her eyes and crossed her arms across her chest. "Look, I don't understand why this is bugging you so much. I thought you liked the guy."

"Liked him? Where'd you get that from? Maybourne ranks right above… below… Apophis…if he wasn't already dead. I don't like him. I can barely tolerate the man."

"You're the one that called him when we had our little foothold problem," he reminded.

"I didn't call him because I liked him."

"Then why?"

"I…Teal'c and I didn't exactly have time to check the phone book."

"Meaning?"

"Meaning I needed to contact someone in the NID and I had no idea who else to call. He was the only person I could remember that had clearance," she admitted quietly.
Jack chuckled. "What?" she asked, offended. "It's not like I have the whole Air Force phone book memorized."

He waved his hand. "It's not that. It's just…Harry's got a crush on you, you know?"

Her mouth fell open and he swore she paled a bit. "What?" she stuttered out.

He nodded. "Definitely a crush. He talked about nothing else. Just rambled for weeks on end. Carter this, Carter that…"

"He did not," she protested.

"Did so."

"Did not."

"How would you know?" he countered.

"So what else did you talk about?" she said, neatly turning the conversation around.

"What?"

"You had a whole month to chit chat. If Maybourne spent all of it talking about me…what did you talk about?"

"Umm…well, we aah. We didn't have much time to talk really."

"Really? I find that surprising, I mean, there wasn't too much else to do around there and …"

"Fishing," he blurted out.

"Fishing?" she asked skeptically.

"The different styles and techniques, lures versus bait. Harry's sorta a…grenade kinda guy, while I like to do it with a little more finesse."

"Finesse?"

"Yeah. I mean, sure you can blow them out of the water, one big bang and it's all over or you can use a line and reel em in ever so gently. Do it right and the fish is in your hand before it ever realizes it's been hooked," he said. She chuckled and looked down. "How about that dinner? You, Teal'c and Jonas have a month's worth of gossip to catch me up on," he suggested.

"Sure," she agreed. "Dinner would be nice."

"Cool. We'll go grab the aliens and head out. What are you hungry for?"

"There's this new place in town I've been meaning to try. They say the sushi is to die for," she teased, quickening her step to avoid his teasingly raised fist.

"Meat, Carter. I want meat. Beef, big juicy red steak," he called after her retreating figure. "And you can have my salad," he said quietly, picking up the pace to catch up with her.

<><><><><>

Harry slowly opened his eyes, blinking as the morning sun streaked across his bed. Curtains, he needed curtains. This up with the dawn stuff was for the birds. He shifted and rolled over. And a mattress with box springs, a feather bed would be even better.
Groaning, he sat up, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. And coffee. He missed coffee.

The door opened and he moaned softly, rolling his eyes. "Fair day, Harry. Would you like to join us for morning meal?"

"I shoulda shot you first, Jack" he muttered, pasting a smile on his face. "Sure, Laira. Can't wait," he said. "I just can't wait."

~Fin~

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