Fragile Balance
by
Seldear and Denise

 


Disclaimer Stargate Sg-1 and its characters are the property of Stargate (II) Productions, Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. This story is for entertainment purposes only and no money exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author. This story may not be posted elsewhere without the consent of the author.


Message 60319 by MandieLeung on SamandJack

THE STORY BEHIND THE STORY: The inspiration for this story came from MandieLeung on the samandjack list nearly eighteen months ago. She wanted to see a 'Shades of Grey' story where Sam went in instead of Jack. I started writing, and in a reasonably short time (about 6 months) had the 'Shades of Grey' story mapped out and written.

And then I hit a snag. The story wasn't finished. And it stayed unfinished for another 10 months, while I went and worked on other projects.

During this time, I bounced ideas off Denise as I usually do. We mapped out the second half of the story, but I could never get into writing it. And then I pretty much decided that I wasn't going to write much more SG-1 fic, and she begged to be allowed to finish it. I'm glad I agreed to let her!

Oddly enough, in spite of three years of mailing and IM'ing back and forth, it's the first collaborative work between us.

Some of you may recognise the opening vignette of this story from the 'Women of Stargate' contest - it was then named 'Everything She Had' and finished after Sam resigns from the Air Force in Hammond's office.

Denise: I always have fun plotting with Sel. Both of us have learned the advantages to talking (or typing) out your ideas with someone else. And it helps so much more when that someone is massively demented and 'ebil'. When Sel told me that this story was probably going to just 'not end', I thought 'No, that can't happen. It's too cool of an idea to just die'. So I asked her for permission to finish it. And I almost succeeded. I got a lot of the latter part…then I handed it back to Sel for her to put it to bed.

All in all, and admitting that I'm far from objective, I think it's a nice, warped alternate universe. And I write it with mixed feelings. I love that she trusted me with it, I loved writing it, and I'm sad that it's probably going to be the only story we ever co-write.

My thanks to her for the idea and the trust in letting me play in her universe

 

Sometimes it was kinder to be cruel.

Sam Carter knew that. That was the meaning of 'discipline' after all.

And the Asgard trusted her. They trusted that she wasn't involved in the technology theft. They trusted that she could do this 'favour' for them. They trusted that she could carry this off.

If they'd gotten the Colonel back sooner, then maybe he would have been the one sitting in the locker room pondering what was about to be done.

"You realise, Major, that there can be no turning back. Are you sure you want to do this?"

The General had given her the choice. He could have ordered her, but he didn't.

Sam wasn't unaware of the compliment he paid her in presenting this mission as a request and not a command, and because he had asked instead of ordering, she had done it.

"Yes, sir. I'm sure." Sam didn't like it. But she'd been trained as a soldier: emotions had to come second to the mission at hand.

She met Hammond's steady, measuring gaze, feeling the squirm in her stomach. She didn't want to do this - she was a soldier, not an actress! But her wants came second to Earth's needs. And Earth needed the Asgard and the Tollan more than they needed Sam's sensibilities.

There wasn't even a guarantee that she'd get out of it alive. If things went pear-shaped on this mission, then she was as good as buried.

It wasn't a nice thought.

A worse thought was that the thin threads of trust between her and her team-mates might not survive. Over the last few months, her relationships with Teal'c and Daniel had been stretched to breaking-point, and come back to comfortable levels. Still, Sam was only too aware that just a little more pressure might snap some things that couldn't be fixed - especially since the Colonel had returned from Edora. And things were more fragile between her and the Colonel than they had ever been before.

Sam carefully steered away from that thought and the nausea that inevitably followed. Instead, she put her head in her hands and raked her fingers through her hair.

A week before the particle accelerator was finished, she'd been called into Hammond's office and the proposition was put before her. Initial attempts to cry off because of her work on the particle accelerator had been gently put aside.

"Major, you've done a mighty work in creating that particle accelerator, but the fact is that I've come under some pretty heavy criticism for allowing such a large portion of research and resources to be diverted towards getting back a man who may or may not be dead anyway."

"The Edorans-"

"Are easily relocated," he said. "That's the opinion of the strategists in the Pentagon, not my own, Major. This matter of the technology smuggling is urgent - we have less than a month to clear it up before the Asgard and the Tollan sever diplomatic ties - including the Protected Planets Treaty we signed eight months ago."

The General didn't need to tell her how important the Protected Planets Treaty was to Earth. Without it, it was only a matter of time before the Goa'uld came in to dominate or destroy Earth and her population.

So Sam Carter made a choice. It might condemn the Colonel to several more weeks off Earth, but better be late bringing him home than making a decision which might mean there wouldn't be a home for him to return to.

"How long do I have to finish the accelerator before the Tollan and the Asgard start putting pressure on us to do something?"

Hammond looked grim. "A week."

She'd done it in a week. Incredibly. Unbelievably.

Painfully.

The particle accelerator broke through the crust over the Stargate, the wormhole made it through to Edora, Teal'c reached the surface in time, they returned the Edoran refugees home and went to bring the Colonel home...

Only to find that he'd made Edora his home.

Now the nausea struck like a storm at sea, tossing her about in its throes. She swallowed hard and concentrated on making it go away. She couldn't afford personal emotions and distractions right now. She had a part to play and an audience to convince.

And what a tough audience.

Sam was desperately afraid that she wouldn't be able to do what it required, afraid she wouldn't be able to carry it off, and she desperately wanted the job to be handed to someone else. Except for the small problem that there was nobody else to do it.

Oh, the Colonel probably could have gone undercover, but the Asgard had asked for her help in his absence, and while they trusted that Colonel O'Neill wasn't involved, the less people who knew about this the better.

There had been concerns that she wouldn't be able to carry it off - among them, her own. She wasn't the loosest cannon in the SGC, after all, but once the Asgard and Tollan had fixed on her, they refused to hear of any alternatives.

Stubborn, headstrong aliens. No wonder they liked the Colonel.

With a deep sigh, Sam stood up and opened her locker to get her dress uniform out. Her misgivings about this were strong, but the longer she hesitated, the worse the fear would get and the more likely she would freeze when she needed to act.

The diplomatic mission to the Tollan was due to leave in two hours. It would be her second time in command of SG-1, so any nervousness on her part would be put down to that - or so she hoped. She wasn't all that fond of remembering the first time she'd commanded SG-1. Talking to tribal spirits? Letting aliens into the base? Planning to steal trinium from local tribes?

That mission had turned out badly.

And this one - well, she knew this one wasn't going to go down well.

Stealing from your friends never went down well.

General Hammond had said her actions would be attributed to the stress of the last three months. She'd withdrawn from Teal'c and Daniel since the General had assigned her to this mission, so she didn't need to worry too much about them cottoning on to her sudden, unusual behaviour. As far as she could tell, they'd assumed her behaviour was due to the completion of the particle accelerator and just let it pass by rather than confront it.

The trickiest bit would be convincing the people who only had her apparently perfect record by which to judge her behaviour.

She hung the uniform on the locker handle and stepped back, letting her fingers run over the heavy weave of the material. The guys would shortly arrive, Colonel O'Neill and Teal'c all sweaty after their morning sparring. They'd head directly for the showers, and she'd be left with a few precious minutes to change into her dress blues.

The Colonel wouldn't be going today. Officially, he was still being checked over from his three months on Edora. Unofficially, Hammond had made sure that Janet would keep him around today for more tests to ensure that Colonel O'Neill couldn't go to Tollana.

The Colonel's presence would wreck their carefully laid plans.

So Lieutenant Rumlow was temporarily assigned to SG-1 for this diplomatic mission to bring their numbers up to the standard four members for a Stargating team. The Lieutenant had been on SG-11 for nearly two years now, so he'd seen more than his fair share of diplomacy. He'd been working with Daniel to put together the presentation to the Tollan.

Daniel would be late, of course. He hadn't been sleeping well for a while now - even six months after her death, he was still dreaming - or having nightmares - about Sha're. He'd been the one to deal with the Edoran people and their relocation to another planet while Sam worked on the particle accelerator. He'd done his fair share of ideas-bouncing for her, moral support when Teal'c needed kel no reem and could no longer keep an eye on her as she worked herself into the ground. And he'd been the person she went to that first night after Colonel O'Neill came home, where she'd found that his sense of betrayal by the Colonel's low expectations was as strong as her own.

Her heart sunk. If she got through this alive...when she got through this alive, the Colonel would probably forgive her - or at least understand why she'd done it. Teal'c should. Those two might be a bit miffed, but they'd survive.

However, Daniel...

She put that thought away as she shut her locker door and heard the voices and footsteps down the corridor that indicated that her team-mates were approaching and her solitude was at an end. There was no point in fretting over the outcome of her actions today - she might not even make it through the whole charade.

Part of her hoped she wouldn't - at least then she wouldn't have to pick up the pieces afterwards.

Positive thoughts, Sam.

There was a knock at the door, "Carter?"

"Sir." Her voice was calm and cool, no tremors to betray her nervousness at the part she was about to play.

"Are you decent?"

"Yes, sir."

"We're coming in." A moment later, the Colonel's greying head stuck around the door. "Up bright and early and ready to hit your head against some thick Tollan skull, Carter?"

In spite of the roiling feelings in her stomach, Sam managed a smile. "Something like that, sir. How are you today, Teal'c?"

"I am well, Major Carter." Teal'c appreciated the formalities - even if the Colonel didn't usually observe them. "And yourself?"

"I'm good." Sam hoped her body language was consonant with her words. Between Teal'c and the Colonel - both of whom had years of experience training men and women and reading their body language - and Daniel, whose speciality in linguistics had led him to study the things people didn't say with their mouths, she could easily get caught on an iceberg she never saw coming until it was too late.

She hoped not. If she could fool them, she could fool anyone.

"Nervous about commanding again?"

Thank God for reasonable excuses. "A little, sir."

"Don't be. You'll do fine." He patted her on the shoulder, apparently unaware of how she stiffened under the well-intentioned touch of his hand. "Well, Teal'c and I are gonna shower before we stink up your dress blues, and we'll catch you in the briefing in thirty." He grabbed a towel and ducked into the stalls beyond, Teal'c following him with considerably less haste and more dignity.

Sam began unbuttoning her shirt.

Showtime.

----

It had been easier than she'd expected. And they were falling for it, hook, line and sinker.

Maybe she should have gone in for an acting career instead of the Air Force. Samantha Carter, actress - bratty officers a specialty.

"Major, do you realise exactly what kind of a situation you have placed us in?"

"Sir," she said with the forceful coolness she'd decided to adopt; close enough to her usual demeanour so it wasn't completely out of her ballpark, but changed enough to let them know that something had snapped. "I realise the situation. I also realise the kind of situation they've placed us in! We're nothing more than vassals to their technological superiority. Allies who aren't willing to share their knowledge with us or even give us the most basic of defence technologies."

"Your actions were out of order, Major!" The General wasn't half a bad actor himself - he was doing an excellent show of bewildered anger at the outrageous behaviour of one of his 'exemplary' officers.

"My actions were in line with the core mission of this base, sir. With all due respect, we are called upon to go through the gate and find technologies that will be useful in the defence of Earth against Goa'uld incursion."

"By stealing it from our friends?" Colonel O'Neill had been stiffly angry from the moment he'd realised that the technology she placed on the briefing table was not the peace offering between Tollan and Terran that he'd immediately assumed it was.

The looks he kept shooting her way indicated that he at least felt she'd taken leave of her senses. Sam didn't dare look at Teal'c or Daniel. Or at poor Lieutenant Rumlow, sitting bewildered and frozen in his chair.

She turned on the Colonel, "Sir, not one hour ago, we were wasting our time on the Tollan. They weren't going to give us the technology we wanted."

"That didn't give you leave to just take it, Carter!"

"No, sir. But I have, on occasion, been congratulated for my initiative." She let dry irony seep into her voice. Excuses were excuses when all was said and done.

"Not this time, Major." General Hammond told her. "You are relieved of your duties, effective immediately, and are to report to the infirmary until I send for you."

Her brows arched in deliberately mocking expression, "What? No base arrest?"

The alert started up for an incoming traveller a split-second later. The Tollan would be coming to Earth in their role of indignant victims at the theft Sam had committed.

Hammond glanced over at the red light flashing then back at her. "If you continue in this vein, Major, that will be next. Dismissed. Teal'c, please escort Major Carter to the infirmary."

The Colonel gave her a long look before he followed Hammond down the stairs. Daniel stood up from his chair, about to ask what was up with her, so Sam turned her back on him and walked away, refusing to engage him in conversation. She heard Teal'c's steady, measured footsteps behind her - could hear them behind her as she headed for the elevator.

His disapproval of her actions, though silent, stung.

It forced her silence all the way up to the infirmary, although once Janet walked out of her office, Sam knew she was facing what would probably be her toughest audience. The boys were more used to seeing Major Sam Carter, although they occasionally got to see 'just Sam'. Janet, however, had seen a lot more of Sam in the full array of her moods - not just as a military officer.

"I've been told to do a full set of tests on you," Janet said, eyeing her.

Sam shrugged. "Well, let's get it over with." She walked past Janet and hopped up on one of the beds.

Sam wasn't meant to catch Janet's bewildered glance at Teal'c, but she did. And Teal'c looked no less puzzled than the doctor.

They ran tests. Lots of tests. Janet asked when was the last time she'd had her period (a week ago) and when was the last time she had sex (too long ago). They ruled out PMT and pregnancy. Then there were blood tests and hormone tests, a CAT scan and a PET scan, an EEG and an MRI, and they took Sam's blood pressure.

It was a waste of Janet's time, although only Sam and General Hammond knew that. As Janet kept up a running commentary with Sam about things large and small, personal and work-related, Sam responded in her usual manner - but allowing herself a slightly looser rein. The only thing she had right now was a bad case of undercover agent nervousness. And there wasn't much that could take that away except the completion of her mission.

"Well, there's nothing wrong with you so far," Janet finished off as Sam swung her legs over the side of the infirmary bed. "It'll be a while before I get the hormone and blood tests back but...you're all fine."

Except for the sudden kleptomania, Sam thought dryly.

On cue, the infirmary phone rang and Janet went to answer it. "Fraiser. Yes, sir? Yes, she's here, I'll send her up." The phone was hung up, and a moment later Janet came back to the bedside. "General Hammond wants to see you in his office."

With a jaunty grin, Sam hopped off the bed. "Thanks, Janet. It's always a pleasure to have needles stuck into me." And she walked out, knowing that Janet was standing behind her with a surprised look on her face.

Teal'c faithfully shadowed her back down to the elevators, but didn't say anything until she'd pressed the button and was waiting for the lift. "I do not understand your behaviour, Major Carter."

She quirked a smile at him, "Oh, come on, Teal'c. Haven't you ever really wanted to cut loose before?" The elevator doors opened and she stepped in, her companion one step behind her. "Just to say what you really want to say and rules be damned?" There were moments when she'd wanted to scream, shout, cry, or laugh - and had been required to hold it under the mask of a good officer. Now, she had to behave as if she didn't care whether or not someone in authority perceived her as a good officer or not - all the while really caring that they would.

"I have not, Major Carter." Teal'c sounded, if not exactly distressed, then bewildered. Sam suspected that for him - as for her - the habits of self-control were so ingrained that 'letting loose' was more effort than being self-contained. Her behaviour would be incomprehensible to him until he knew the reasons why she'd behaved so oddly.

A shrug. Sam suspected she'd do a lot of nonchalant shrugging in the next couple of days. "Your loss, Teal'c."

The doors slid open at level 27. Sam strode out, heading for the Gate room and two corridors later found herself confronted by Daniel.

He put his hands up - partly to stop them from crashing into each other, partly to make sure that she didn't just walk by him. And she very nearly did. Today had been one confrontation after another with no respite - and the worst was yet to come.

He studied her through his glasses. "Sam, are you okay?"

"Sure, Daniel. Why wouldn't I be okay?"

Her question put him on the mark, forcing him to face what she'd done. "Well, your actions haven't exactly...it's not your usual behaviour."

"Daniel, you only ever see me when I'm on duty." Sam walked around him. "You don't know what my usual behaviour is." The dismissal was as abrupt as she could bear to make it - enough to sting him but hopefully not enough to really hurt him. She'd have to become adept at that in the next few days. And even more adept at making up in the weeks afterwards.

Assuming there were weeks afterwards.

It appeared the Tollan representatives were already gone - which was a relief. She didn't have to put on the act towards them for Teal'c's benefit. Even then, Sam wasn't sure that any such display would have been an act either. The position she was in was impossible: stuck between what Earth needed her to be and what she wanted to be.

Hammond had assured her that her actions during this mission would have no consequences on her career. Easy words to say before Sam did the irrevocable and said things for which there might be no forgiveness. The guys were stubborn. She'd find herself pressing every button to keep them away, severing all ties of respect and friendship to be sure their hands stayed clean - and that they stayed clear of what she had to do.

It was her only option.

She reminded herself of that as she strolled into Hammond's office to take her dressing down. There was no quailing under his stern gaze, nor under the Colonel's close and sharp scrutiny. And there would be no escaping this axe.

The door was surprisingly heavy to close - or maybe Sam's arms were suddenly weak. She closed it, though, shooting Teal'c a brilliant smile as he waited outside the door - a silent, solid guardian. Then, she sat down in the chair and regarded the General.

He came straight to the point. "Major Carter, you've crossed the line here. The Tollan have demanded the return of their technology and require that you are appropriately dealt with."

Sam interrupted, knowing what she was in for. They'd discussed this when the matter of her assignment first came up. What needed to happen, what would happen, and how it would happen. "By 'appropriately dealt with', are we talking the death sentence, sir, or merely a slap on the wrist, 'give it back'?" Light voice, easy tone, casual pose - she had it all down pat. At least, she hoped she didn't look like she was tense as a strung wire.

"We're talking about a court martial, Major. I have to press charges."

It took all her strength not to flinch from the words. Court martial. An officer's nightmare. Humiliation, separation from those you'd served with, black marks all over your record - and even if you were exonerated, at best they'd be scrubbed off to grey. If you faced court martial over anything, you were better off out of the armed forces since there would be very few who'd trust you again. Doubly so if you were a woman in the armed forces.

But they were waiting on her answer.

"Sir, you have your prerogatives and I have mine. You'll do what you have to as I did what I felt needed to be done." Her chin lifted and she met her gaze squarely. Indeed, she'd done what needed to be done - and hated every second of it.

The Colonel leaned forward in his chair, "Carter," he said. There was a sadness in his voice as he spoke and Sam kept her expression politely neutral as she turned to regard him. "There is another option other than court-martial. Discharge. Voluntary retirement. If you take it, then we hand back the tech, you resign and it's over."

Such final words.

Over.

Finished. Done with. Ended. Concluded.

Sam hated the Tollan and the Asgard more at that moment than she'd ever hated anyone or anything before in her life. Because this might be Earth's future, but it was her life - and they were asking her to give it up: not only all the work she'd done in the past but any hopes of a future.

Colonel O'Neill looked back at her with a very intent gaze, watching her, judging her - condemning her?

Sam transferred her gaze to the General. She met his gaze and saw that he understood the weight of the burden pressing down on her and all the hopes and dreams she would be giving up with this task.

She looked beyond him to the golden eagle, soaring on unfelt winds, representing the freedom that the USA and her armed forces strove to maintain.

Freedom and hope and a future, yes; but also responsibility and duty and sacrifice. You couldn't have the first without the second - and sometimes the individual desire had to be made subordinate to the greater good. Even the USA, as individualistic a society as it was, understood that in the requests it made of its armed forces.

"Major?"

She let a smile cross her face and a shrug lift her shoulders as she met General Hammond's eyes again. "I guess I'm taking a voluntary retirement, Uncle George." The childhood name seemed strange on her lips - and yet also fitting: a fond nickname and a familiar appellation. The personal in the midst of the impersonal, the uncertainty of a child in a strange and foreign place, and the silent fear of a soldier who knew how much rested on her shoulders and wasn't sure she could walk the path.

But she'd give it everything she had.

Because if she didn't give it everything she had, when the smoke cleared she wouldn't have anything at all.

----

Rob Makepeace caught up with Jack in the corridor, falling into step with a heavy tread.

"How's the search for a new 2IC going?"

The question was innocuous enough, but Jack still stiffened. "Slowly," he retorted.

"Can't find one to suit you?"

Jack stopped and turned on the other man, "And just what is that supposed to mean?"

Makepeace's expression was all astonishment. It might have even been real. "It's supposed to mean that finding a 2IC who you can trust isn't exactly the easiest task in the world. Jeeze, what did you think I meant, Jack?"

Jack didn't know what he meant. He turned away and kept walking. "Never mind."

The Marine kept pace with him, not bothering to ask if Jack even wanted his presence.

"Okaaaaay," Makepeace drawled, sounding as though he'd been taking lessons from Daniel in making un-comforting noises. "No idea what caused her to go like that?"

"None." Jack didn't want to discuss this. Not here, not now, and certainly not with Robert Makepeace. He'd rather not have to discuss it at all.

Unfortunately, Carter was out of the Air Force and there wasn't a force on heaven or on earth that could bring her back or turn back the clock by forty-eight hours.

"Just asking." Makepeace shrugged. "You going to be at the leaders meeting on Friday?"

"Do I get a choice?"

"You might be off-world."

"No 2IC."

"Then that's up to you, isn't it?" Makepeace walked on as Jack stopped at the elevators, jabbed at the button and swiped his card through the reader.

Then he stuck his hands in his pockets and didn't tap his toe on the ground.

Hammond was still throwing around ideas for a fourth member for SG-1 - another military officer, preferably one with a scientific background.

Jack didn't want another member for SG-1. He'd gotten so used to relying on Carter that turning around to find someone else guarding his six would just be...weird. And Carter was one of the best officers he'd ever had the honour to serve alongside.

The latest batch of replacements Hammond suggested (the first batch had been dismissed out of hand, and Jack suspected Hammond of re-entering some of the first batch into the second) included a vulcanologist, a chemist, two engineers, and a meteorologist.

No astrophysicists at all.

The situation sucked. Royally, supremely, and suckily.

At least Daniel was talking to him again, Jack thought. No cloud without a silver lining. Although, in spite of the pleasantness of not getting 'the Jackson cold shoulder' anymore, Jack would rather have skipped the cloud altogether - silver lining notwithstanding.

Carter had signed the papers in Hammond's office, saluted them both, and left.

Forty-eight hours later, her quarters were cleared out, her locker was empty, and her nameplate was gone. Her username and password had been revoked in the computer systems, the personal effects of her office taken away; she'd shaken the hands of the people she'd worked with, hugged Daniel and Teal'c and saluted Jack. And Jack still didn't quite believe that Carter was gone.

He still wasn't sure he knew what had happened.

He still wasn't sure he believed what had happened.

The technology sat on the briefing room table, incredibly complex stuff in an exceedingly simple-looking package.

Jack nearly crowed with triumph. After seven months of fruitless negotiations with the Tollan pomposities, Daniel had managed to persuade them to part with one of their thingamabobs.

He'd thought the Tollan would never be swayed, although Hammond had evidently differed in opinion. God only knew why. Hammond wasn't one of the fluffy-hearts brigade.

"So what is this device you've brought back, Major?"

"It's a device which disables weapons as the bearers pass by," Carter replied. "It worked on both our weapons and the Goa'uld weapons when Colonel O'Neill and Daniel were defending Ska'ara in the Triad."

"That should come in handy." Hammond said, a smile breaking out on his rubicund face. "Well done, Major, Doctor."

"Thank you, sir." She seemed serene, poised...brittle.

The brittleness hadn't registered until everything around them had shattered.

"So what did you promise them in return, Dr. Jackson?"

Daniel shifted in his chair, oddly unelated by the acquisition of technology. Jack would later realise that only Carter burned with the inner flame of triumph - the rest of SG-1 was cold, damp ash in comparison. "Nothing." He glanced at Sam from under his lashes. "We didn't have to promise them anything, General."

"They gave us the device as a reward for saving them from the Goa'uld?"

Daniel pushed his glasses up, "Actually, they refused to give us any technology at all."

"Well, I'm confused. How did you get the device, Dr. Jackson?"

Jack was watching Carter's face, suddenly remembering an old saw about never really knowing a woman at all.

He didn't need her confirmation that she'd taken the device in the end. He realised it before the outraged disbelief seeped into Hammond's voice and demeanour, before Lieutenant Rumlow blurted out the situation, before her calm voice confirmed that she'd taken by force what the Tollan had been unwilling to render them in diplomatic exchange.

And she met his gaze squarely in a contest of wills, and he was the one who looked away first.

The woman who'd met his gaze was a stranger.

Jack still didn't know what had gotten into Carter. Admittedly, she'd been acting odd those last couple of days. They'd only just returned to active duty after his return from Edora - between her exhaustion from working herself to the bone on the particle accelerator and his own re-acclimatisation to Earth, SG-1 had been put on downtime.

Jack had spent most of it by himself, interspersed with visits from Teal'c. At least Teal'c was still the same. Something had gotten into Carter and Daniel, and Jack didn't have the slightest idea what it was.

Later, as he sat down in Daniel's office, where Daniel was talking about Carter's resignation again, Jack realised he still didn't know what he'd done to get on Daniel's bad side. Not that it really mattered anymore. Whatever had been bugging Daniel had been pushed aside in favour of trying to work out why Carter had done what she'd done.

"Someone's got to go talk to her," Daniel was saying, and Jack finally tuned in. "Something's got to be wrong. Sam just doesn't do that kind of thing! You heard what she was saying during the briefing...that's not Sam..."

"Dr. Fraiser was unable to find anything physiologically wrong with Major Carter."

"Then, I don't know, maybe we should be looking at other things? It's not necessarily physical or hormonal...it might be emotional or stress-related..." Jack caught the quick flicker of the eyes that Daniel sent his way and frowned a little.

"Stress-related?" He let the emotional one slide for the moment.

"She worked very hard to get you back."

That particle accelerator of hers. He guessed she'd worked pretty hard on it. There were vague rumours of Major Carter's dedication to 'the Edora project' around the base, although the people in question always shut up when they saw Jack.

"What, you think the stress of the job cracked her?"

"Stranger things have happened, Jack." Daniel's voice held a note that indicated that Jack should find this significant. Exactly what Jack was supposed to find significant, he had no idea.

Jack put his head in his hands and scrubbed his fingers through his hair. "Look, Daniel, even if there was a reason for her behaviour - and I imagine it would be a pretty damn strong one - we couldn't get her back on SG-1. She's no longer Air Force, they'd never take her back..."

"Not even as a civilian?"

"Unlikely," Jack said. He didn't explain the convoluted reasons upon reasons for Carter's resignation - the fact that they'd probably never take her back under any circumstances since she'd 'proven' herself unworthy as an officer of the Air Force.

The ironic thing was that there were times when Jack had wondered if the technology thieves who'd been using the second Stargate didn't have the idea after all. Take what you needed as you needed it. Obviously not from people like the Madronans, but from people who had it...

Then, after thinking these thoughts, sanity would reassert itself. The only people worth stealing the tech from were those you'd rather were on your side, anyway. You really didn't want them mad at you. And if they weren't willing to give you the stuff, then the next best thing was to make friends with them and have them there to keep the bad guys away when you couldn't keep them out yourself.

Jack hoped that Carter's actions had just been a lapse in judgement - a very fatal one as far as her career was concerned, but it was better than thinking that he'd missed something. The dereliction of his duty in keeping an eye on the state of mind of his people stung as much as the betrayal of the values he'd thought were second-nature to both him and her.

It was easier thinking that than thinking she'd changed so much without Jack noticing it.

Not that Jack had been around to notice lately.

"Don't you want her back on the team, Jack?"

"Don't be stupid, Daniel - of course I want Carter back on the team! But it's not going to happen - not after what she did, certainly not after her resignation! At the most, they'd let her back in here as a contractor - maybe. If we were in dire circumstances - and they'd have to be really dire! But that's not usually the way things work on Air Force projects!"

"Well, I think you should go and talk to her, anyway."

That was an unexpected surprise. "Me?"

"You're the leader of this team," Daniel said.

He didn't want to go. Jack O'Neill didn't do 'talking' well. But Daniel had a point. He was the leader of SG-1 and Carter was a member of SG-1. Had been a member of SG-1. And something had happened to her while she was technically under his command and he'd never twigged. That it had gone so far was partly his responsibility, and he owed her the gesture.

Didn't mean he had to like it.

"You're closer to her."

"If you don't want to go, then just say so, Jack." Blue eyes glared at him. "Just don't make excuses."

"That wasn't an excuse!" Jack snapped back. So maybe Daniel talking to him again wasn't such a good thing after all. Distance definitely made the heart grow fonder as far as Daniel was concerned. "I'll go."

"Good." Daniel turned back to whatever it was he'd been translating before the issue of Carter's retirement came up. "And don't sound so cheerful about it."

Jack grimaced and went back to the personnel profiles.

Come back from Edora. No probs. He hadn't done a thing to help it, really.

Re-acclimatise to Earth. Easy. The three months of Edora were fading into his memory already.

Get used to sleeping alone again. Okay, not quite so easy. He'd forgotten how nice it was to wake up to someone else in the bed. But he couldn't have stayed on Edora and Laira would never have fit into his life on Earth. The situation was no more right for them than it was for him and Sara after Charlie died.

Go back on missions. More difficult. While he'd never liked the idea of grubbing around in the dirt, he had to admit that farming was peaceful. Uneventful. Certainly, nowhere near as stressful as the fighting he'd done all his life. Or as tiring as being diplomatic with hard-headed alien races.

Deal with the crisis kindled by the actions of a junior officer who had no previous record of any such behaviour, but certainly enough reason in the last few years to lose it in such a spectacular manner. Difficult. Coming hard on the heels of his return and dealing with everything he'd thought he'd lost and everything that had happened in his absence, it had spun him out, confused him. It still did.

Get Carter to talk about whatever had prompted the temporary insanity that had caused her actions on Tollana?

Damn well impossible.

----

By the end of the third day, Sam was getting antsy.

She'd cleaned the house from top to bottom, done the grocery shopping, written emails to all the friends she occasionally kept in touch with, manicured her nails, read through the graduate papers of the physics department at the Academy, and was reduced to reading the ordinary, everyday news.

None of it was good.

And it wasn't made any better by the apprehension Sam was feeling over this whole thing.

She wasn't quite sure what she was waiting to happen. Hammond hadn't been able to tell her anything, mostly because he didn't know anything.

They were expecting someone to contact her in the coming few days. They didn't know who, and they didn't know how. It was a leap of faith over a chasm in the dark. Once the solid ground was gone from beneath her feet, she'd have to wing it.

Once again, Sam wished that someone else had been chosen to carry out this mission. She'd never done undercover before and she had no idea if she was doing it right. If there was a right way to go about it at all.

She clicked through the TV channels finding nothing to her tastes, so she turned the TV off.

Then she glanced over at the chess game still in progress on the coffee table before the TV. She and Daniel had been in the middle of a 'best of five' the night before they left to go to Edora. All Daniel's attempts to lure her back to the game had been futile in the three months since, and the game stood, untouched and unwon, in a perpetual state of battle that might never conclude.

Sometimes she wondered if that was the way of their fight against the Goa'uld. Never-ending, never concluding. Old hopes dying under the crush of their duty and new hopes never being given birth as the war, like a monster, swallowed everything in their lives.

Miserable thoughts, Sam. She glanced out the back door at her garden. Maybe she should go outside and start fixing up the garden? It would give her hands something to do anyway, even if her mind wandered and wondered.

The knock at the door startled her and she turned to regard it with someone approaching a sense of dread. This was probably it. No going back from here.

You can't go back now. You have nowhere and no one to go back to, she thought grimly.

But when she pulled the door open, her guest was Colonel O'Neill.

She had a moment of absolute panic as a barrage of thoughts slipped in and out of her mind in mere seconds.

What's he doing here? I'm no longer his concern. Unless he's been sent to contact me... But...the Colonel? Of all the possible people she had envisioned as part of this setup, he had not been one of them.

"Carter."

"Sir."

He grimaced. "Lose the 'sir'. I'm not your commanding officer anymore." There was a definite gruff component to his voice and Sam suddenly had a slightly nasty sick feeling in her stomach.

Under different circumstances, she might have been very glad of those words. At least she wouldn't have to deny that the respect and affection she felt for him was, in Janet's euphemistic phrasing, 'a problem'. Maybe there would even have been possibilities opening up for them...

Bitter memory provided the clarity she needed as she remembered the frozen humiliation of him walking away from her - to the arms of another woman. Never mind that he didn't have the faintest idea about her own personal revelations while he was on Edora, it had still been a slap in the face.

And now, with so much riding on her ability to keep him and her other old team-mates away, Sam would have to issue the slap in his face that drove him away.

She shrugged, leaning against the doorframe. "Old habits. Sir." She gently emphasised the title and watched him grimace.

"May I come in?"

No.

"Sure. Not for too long, though. I've got things to do." Brisk and brusque. That's the way to do it, Sam.

He followed her down the hallway. "Keeping yourself busy, then?"

"Yeah. Puttering around the house. Makes a nice change from saving the world."

He paused at the entrance to the main living area, glancing around it in swift reconnaissance. "So have you decided where you're going to work now?"

Sam shrugged. "I haven't started looking yet. Enjoying the downtime." She didn't offer him refreshments of any kind since she didn't want him to stay. And if he started questioning her too intently, she wasn't sure how well she'd hold out. Hammond had warned her about being under scrutiny - especially after her ties with the SGC were broken. They'd want to make sure that her disgrace was for real.

Her house was probably bugged and she'd really had to fight the temptation to see if she could find them. That would give her away.

"I never figured you as the type to relax, Carter." He interrupted her thoughts, seeing that she wasn't about to make the small talk.

"It gets easier as you get used to it. You should know that from Edora."

"There wasn't a lot of relaxing on Edora." He sounded short now. That's right, get him on the back foot. Behave in a manner he wouldn't expect from 'Major Sam Carter', and confuse him enough so he doesn't ask questions until it's too late. "Mostly we were working to try to get the harvest set up so we didn't starve through the winter."

"Ah." His identification with the Edoran remnant was interesting. Sam filed that note away for later use.

He glanced up at her noise of doubtful understanding. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"From the look of things when we broke through to the surface, the harvest wasn't the only thing you seemed to be setting up."

The dark eyes narrowed a little as he stared at her. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Her voice was cool and slightly malicious as she said, "Only that it didn't take you very long to 'get comfortable' on Edora."

"That happened later."

"I'm sure." There was a certain enjoyment to be taken in being 'the bitch'. Sam always had a lot to say - she just didn't always say it. Military training had taught her that much, at least; given her a measure of self-control and a feeling for when to say something and when to rein it in.

Ostensibly, she wasn't in the military anymore. And while she didn't want to burn all her bridges, it was necessary that she at least singe some to the point where people would think twice about crossing them.

"Exactly what are you implying, Carter?"

It was a perfect opening.

She met his gaze, full force. "For a man who holds the view that nobody should get left behind, you didn't seem to have a lot of faith in the people you lead. For someone who knows that the Asgard and the Tollan and the Tok'ra can traverse galaxies in a matter of minutes, you seemed remarkably sure that you were going to be staying there permanently. And for someone for whom parenthood is considered such a sacred duty, you jumped into the sack with the Edoran fast enough." The information about the Edoran woman's desire for a child had come from a number of sources: base gossip, the Edoran refugees' gossip, and an overheard conversation between the Colonel and Teal'c. "Unless, of course, the local woman was just a passing fancy? A brief roll in the hay?"

His mouth tightened at the cavalier manner of her dismissal. But he still held onto his temper by the thinnest of threads as he gritted out, "Since when have I engaged in casual liaisons, Carter?"

Sam callously snapped the thread. "Both Daniel and Teal'c have indicated the occasional 'bar-cruise pick-up' on your part." Never mind that such 'encounters' were several years old. She watched him flush and took a small satisfaction in it. "And even while on duty, there was always the aging incident with the Argosians."

Irrationally, the memories ached a little. It was long after the fact, long before she'd particularly cared about him - although the incident with the Argosians was annoying for the ease with which he'd jumped into bed with the woman, drugged or not. Off-duty, his sex life was not her business. On-duty, what was she supposed to do with a commanding officer who had no compunction about taking up the first invitation to 'get it on'?

"That," he bit out, "was under an entirely different set of circumstances!"

"Ah, so we make exceptions if the lady is good at flirting in the darkness?" There was a certain satisfaction in being able to say all this. Under his command she was constrained from speaking her true mind. Out from under his command there were no holds barred.

And while a part of her felt sorry for him since he'd obviously come here to check how she was doing, another part was taking a fairly ruthless satisfaction in watching him back away. Whatever he'd been expecting from her, this barrage of accusation was not part of it.

"Laira was one of the few things that kept me going while I was stuck on Edora," he said in a low, dangerous voice. "She took me in when most of her people didn't care whether I lived or died. I was...grateful."

She looked him up and down in a manner that was no less insulting for that it was appreciative, "So I saw."

He bristled, his pride stung. "Carter, I thought I was stuck there on Edora!"

"You thought wrong, sir."

"I know that now."

"You should have known it then."

From the expression on his face - like he'd swallowed something unpleasant - her tactics were working. His features closed up and he stuck his hands in his pockets. "Maybe I should have." The bitter finality in his voice elicited a desire to tell him the whole plan - to blurt out the reasons for her peculiar behaviour, but she thought of the bugs in her house and kept silent. "I..." he looked like he was about to say something - something big and irrevocable.

Sam couldn't afford that. "Colonel," she said in her coolest voice, matching her expression to the tone and aching inside as she did so. "If you came to say sorry about not being more grateful about the rescue, then that's fine. I didn't do it solely for you, and the Edoran refugees were glad to be returned to their home, even if you weren't." Crisp words, sharp edges, cutting tones. A harsh sentence. "I'm sorry I interrupted your romantic idyll on the planet, but I'm sure she won't mind a visit from time to time." She made it sound as sordid as she could manage.

"That will be enough, Carter."

"You forget, Colonel. You don't command me anymore." And after all this, he probably wouldn't want to command her if she ever came back, either.

"Yeah," he said, the words clipped. "I forgot. I just thought that maybe a couple of years of working together counted for something and came to see how you were doing." And there was something terrible in his voice and his expression as he indicated the door. "But since you're doing fine, I guess I'll leave."

The haste with which he made for the door would have been amusing if it wasn't quite so nightmarish. Sam followed him out and was about to shut the door on him when he paused at the edge of the veranda and turned back. She couldn't read the expression on his face, but he was tense as a strung wire. "I never said this, Carter, but...I did want to come back. I just didn't expect to ever get back." He gave a little shrug that had some indefinable element to it that Sam couldn't quite pinpoint. "Thank you for getting me back."

"You're welcome." Her voice was a marvel of quiet unconcern. "Thanks for coming around."

He nodded once then turned away and walked down the steps.

Sam closed the door before he'd reached the path, then laid her head against the door and screwed her eyes tightly shut. All in all, that had probably been the worst fifteen minutes of her life.

She respected the Colonel. Respected and admired him - both as a fellow officer and as a man. The last couple of months had been hard. The last week had been harder.

And maybe it was just her imagination, but it seemed like he'd been so close to saying...to saying...

So close to saying what? She demanded of herself, irritably. To making a passionate declaration of undying love? Get a grip on yourself, Sam! The man's a professional - and so are you!

This whole undercover thing was getting to her, the near-constant tension draining her like a flashlight left on too long. The situation just added the stress of getting the Colonel back from Edora, her own...affection...for the man and the discovery of his relationship with the Edoran woman

Sam wasn't sure she could cope with it all.

And if she didn't work out how to cope in the next couple of days then she could kiss this mission, her life, and the Earth good-bye as the Protected Planets Treaty went down the drain and the Tollan revoked their alliance with Earth.

Levering herself off the door she headed out to the back of the house, seeking something to do with her hands. She'd noticed the gladioli were getting rather crowded in their corner of the backyard. She'd do some gardening to take her mind off what she'd just said.

And how badly the Colonel was going to take it.

----

O'Neill refused to talk about the discussion between him and Major Carter. Daniel Jackson was afire with curiosity, but O'Neill was silent on the details, saying only that their team-mate had told him his concern was appreciated but unnecessary.

Teal'c sat in his room, just emerged from kel no reem. His body felt rested and renewed, but his mind was still troubled. Primarily by Major Carter's behaviour, but also by the events which had transpired from that. The sundering of SG-1 was unwelcome and unpleasant; their team-mate's complete rejection of them no less disturbing than her fall from grace.

He was not sure what would have caused Major Carter to behave in the manner in which she had, but her refusal to talk about it - and O'Neill's refusal to talk about his discussion with her - boded badly for her state of mind at this time.

In the meantime, General Hammond had presented O'Neill with a list of officers from which O'Neill was to choose a replacement for Major Carter. Teal'c had seen O'Neill push the list aside, unwilling to contemplate anyone in Major Carter's role on the team.

Indeed, Teal'c could not imagine going through the gate without their missing team-mate present among them.

The recollection of that first day still clung to his memory. He had stepped through the wormhole to Earth, an unknown to these people, uncertain of whether death or imprisonment awaited him.

He had trusted O'Neill's word, knowing little else that was true in this new environment. He had seen the distrust in the eyes of the man he would come to know as General Hammond, and the wariness in the eyes of the people who had languished in Apophis' prison.

And he had seen the trust in the eyes of the woman who stood on the ramp, with the beauty of a rare and treasured wife, and the mien of a warrior. She did not understand him, but she followed the lead of the man who commanded her, and maybe her own instincts, too. She'd held out her hands to take his weapon - a gesture of trust between warriors - and, recognising a true and kindred spirit in her, Teal'c relinquished it to her hands.

But that had been long ago. Many changes had happened in that time, some of them immediately noticeable, others only gradually so. And somehow, the change in Major Carter had happened while nobody was looking.

It troubled him.

A knock on the door interrupted his thoughts. "Teal'c?"

"Daniel Jackson?"

The door opened, "Jack said to head up to the briefing room. We're getting our new team member. Apparently."

Teal'c rose from his seated position on the floor. "O'Neill has chosen?"

"I guess so." Daniel Jackson sounded less than pleased as he made that pronouncement. He exhaled with a huffing sigh. "Teal'c...did you notice anything about Sam while Jack was away?"

"I did not." Teal'c made the admission with regret. With little knowledge that could assist Major Carter in her endeavour to complete the particle accelerator, Teal'c had settled for keeping a watch on her as much as he could. He offered his services to General Hammond on other teams and training soldiers in use of the weapons of the Goa'uld during O'Neill's absence.

Another sigh. "Me, neither." Daniel Jackson had worked with many of the Edoran refugees, trying to reassure them that they would get home again, finding them somewhere they could stay while they were in the care of the SGC. He, also, had kept an eye on Major Carter, along with Dr. Fraiser. "You don't have any idea of what Sam could have said to clam Jack up like that?"

"I do not, Daniel Jackson." Teal'c felt no guilt at lying to his friend. He had perhaps a small idea, but he was fairly certain that O'Neill would not divulge such a thing, either to Daniel Jackson or himself. And Major Carter certainly would not. "Where is the meeting with O'Neill?"

"Briefing room." Daniel led the way.

Teal'c appreciated his team-mate's thoughtfulness in coming down to inform him of the news. While there was a phone in Teal'c's quarters, he preferred not to be called on it since it interrupted his kel no reem in a very abrupt manner.

"Did Jack say anything to you about who he chose as the new team member?"

"He did not. However, I believe he was inclined towards one of the younger officers with a scientific background."

"He was? I'm surprised. I'd have thought he'd had enough of 'geeks' in me and Sam to last him a lifetime." There was a mild bitterness in Daniel Jackson's voice. Relations between O'Neill and Daniel Jackson had been strained since O'Neill's return from Edora - mainly regarding O'Neill's reluctance to believe that his team would have come after him at any cost.

The question of self-worth and value was moot to Daniel Jackson's mind. His self-esteem was quite intact and he had no problem with the idea that his knowledge and expertise was valuable. However, Teal'c could see how O'Neill's experiences had inclined him to disbelief of his personal worth. In the end, the warriors that made up an army were expendable to those who commanded them - and the warriors learned that at painful cost to themselves.

Teal'c understood that as Daniel Jackson did not.

He had been disconcerted that O'Neill had given up hope, but he did not question O'Neill's desire to regain those things which had been lost to him years ago: the love of a woman and the joy of children. Every warrior understood the deep and abiding desire of his fellow warrior to return to someone at the end of each fight and to have little ones run to him for care.

O'Neill had once possessed both, but had since lost both.

So Teal'c could understand his friend's 'betrayal of faith', even as Daniel Jackson could not.

"I'm almost of a mind to go see Sam myself," his companion remarked. "Someone's got to go and make her see sense."

Perhaps someone did have to 'make Major Carter see sense', however Teal'c doubted there was either a man or Jaffa up to the task at this point in time - or possibly at any point in time. The only person who would be making Major Carter see sense would be herself. Whatever had come upon her, it was powerful enough to throw her from her customary behaviour into the irregular conduct she had displayed in the last week.

Teal'c said nothing, giving neither approval nor disapproval to Daniel Jackson's plans. However, he hoped that his friend would not attempt to speak with Major Carter at this time. O'Neill had been ripe for whatever she had said to him, and Daniel Jackson would be no less vulnerable in such a situation.

In the briefing room, O'Neill, Hammond, and a young woman were waiting for them.

"You've been called here to meet your new team member. This is Lieutenant Claire Tobias, Colonel O'Neill picked her to join SG-1."

"It'll be a pleasure to work with you all," the Lieutenant said. She seemed unusually self-possessed regarding her elevation in status. There had been a significant amount of interest in who would be chosen to succeed Major Carter on SG-1 among the junior officers, and Teal'c understood that someone had been running a betting pool on how long it would take O'Neill to choose a new officer, and who it would be.

Teal'c inclined his head to Lieutenant Tobias in polite greeting as Daniel Jackson asked, "Lieutenant. What's your background?"

"Engineering, Dr. Jackson. Mostly mechanical, although I have a little knowledge of computer and electrical engineering also."

"Lieutenant Tobias has significant expertise with alien technology," General Hammond informed them. "She's been out on assignment with several SG-teams, but this is her first permanent assignment to an SG-team."

Teal'c felt surprise that O'Neill had not chosen someone of greater Stargating experience than the Lieutenant, but he remained silent. Daniel Jackson did not.

"Well, no offence to Lieutenant Tobias, but...I was expecting someone with a little more experience in going through the gate."

The Lieutenant did not seem overly surprised by the objection to her presence on the team. Her answer was cool and collected, "Dr. Jackson, I assure you that I am fully conversant with the tactics of both Goa'uld and Jaffa, and have seen my share of action in my time on and off the various SG-teams. Neither my commanders nor the teams I've worked with have complained of my performance. Nor will SG-1."

"I'm sure you'll make Lieutenant Tobias' transition to the team as smooth as possible, SG-1." General Hammond looked around at them all, "Dismissed."

They milled around for a moment, O'Neill, Daniel Jackson and Teal'c facing off against the wiry young blonde. She regarded them with unusual self-possession in a human her age.

It was O'Neill who finally broke the silence. "Hammond says we'll be heading out on a run tomorrow. Nothing big, just a planetary survey. Done much geology, Tobias?"

"No, sir."

"Well, it's always good to learn new things. You should get quite a bit of a chance on SG-1." It sounded like O'Neill didn't quite know what to do with the Lieutenant.

"Yes, sir."

Once again, silence. "Anyway, I'm off to get some paperwork done before we have to go out tomorrow," O'Neill said. "I'll catch you guys in the commissary later. 'K?" And off he walked.

There was an uncomfortably silent moment of standoffishness before the Lieutenant evidently decided to bite the bullet.

"You don't have anything to say, Dr. Jackson? Nothing about how big the shoes are that I have to fill in Major Carter's absence?"

For once, Daniel Jackson chose to use the short answer instead of the long. "No," he said calmly. "We'll see how you do on the mission tomorrow." And with that he stomped off, clattering down the stairs.

Teal'c was left to regard the newest member of SG-1.

The polite expression dropped a little revealing a slight edge of desperation. "Is it going to be this hard all the way?"

"It will be difficult, Lieutenant Tobias," Teal'c said, deciding that alienating this young woman was not going to be the best way to foster team feeling. And, much as he did not like the circumstances under which she had joined SG-1, he would be obligated to work with her in the future. "We are accustomed to Major Carter. In time, we will become accustomed to you, too."

She smiled a little at that, evidently relieved. "Thank you. I'd better go off and answer all the questions my colleagues are going to want to ask me about this assignment." And with a barely-noticeable hesitation, she also left.

Teal'c turned back to the gate room, looking down at the now-quiescent Stargate.

So many changes. So many things to adjust to.

He wondered what Major Carter was doing. Whatever her state of mind, she was one of the few people in the base that accepted Teal'c as he was - and he missed that. O'Neill was like Teal'c's brother - but his restlessness could irk. Daniel Jackson was a great friend, but Teal'c did not understand the abruptness of his attitude when his concentration was elsewhere.

Major Carter had been driven enough in her pursuits - sometimes too much so - but she had been willing to stop and talk when Teal'c came to see her. Except during those three months when O'Neill had been trapped on Edora.

That time had been difficult for her - and by extension, for the other members of the team. While Major Carter was not yet a leader as O'Neill was, she still commanded their attention, even in O'Neill's absence - and her moods had translated over to her team-mates.

Even after O'Neill's return, she had been restless and troubled.

Teal'c attributed this to her discomfort upon realising that O'Neill did not trust his team as much as they trusted him. That he had not expected them to come for him or to find him after a mere three months. It was a difficult thing to find trust betrayed - and O'Neill had betrayed the trust of his team-mates in accepting his lot with the Edorans and developing a relationship with the Edoran woman.

Both Major Carter and Daniel Jackson had taken it hard - but her response had been out of all proportion. Unexpected and unwelcome when it came, and unfathomable to her team-mates.

Teal'c hoped she was well.

----

Maybourne turning up was nearly a relief after the Colonel's departure. Nearly.

He was cautious in approaching her. She'd had no record of insubordination before, so she guessed that he wanted to see what had broken the perfect Major cast.

In truth, he - and everyone else - had never looked beyond the surface of Sam Carter, model officer. They saw what she wanted them to see and what they expected to see: a woman who did her duty and obeyed orders.

She'd been burned by too many commanders who didn't want a subordinate who could out-think them most of the time. And her career was only everything to her. So she'd learned to keep her head down and stay out of the politics wherever possible. She knew that, eventually, she'd have to get into the politics if she was going to move up the officer ranks - the higher you got, the more political you became; and there were too few assignments where you could manage to avoid the intricacies of politics because you had enough clout to hold them off.

Stargate Command was one of those places. Enough classification to keep most of the political players off their backs, enough urgency to keep it open, enough leeway to run things in an unorthodox manner. Sam had seen the machinations in the corridors of the Pentagon. She'd kept out of it as much as possible as a mere Captain with a Doctorate in Astrophysics - and taken the transfer to the SGC the instant it came up.

So nobody had ever suspected that Major Sam Carter had a wild streak in her. Not even her team.

Certainly not Maybourne.

Sam played her part and, after an initial hesitation, he took the bait. A little too much cloak-and-daggers in Sam's opinion, and were the dramatics of 'This is your last chance to back out' really necessary? If only Maybourne had known - there was no backing out of this one for Sam Carter. No backing out at all.

Although Sam didn't want to back out of this one. Not with the kind of consequences it would incur for Earth.

Duty and sacrifice in the name of honour; personal, organisational, and planetary.

She sat in one of the seats of Maybourne's private jet plane. The second time in six months. Better not get too used to this. Last time had been no more comfortable for her than this time, with Maybourne, the Colonel, and Daniel all watching her like hawks. If she wasn't paranoid before they picked her up at the café, then she certainly was after they'd 'kept an eye' on her for half the plane trip.

The difference now was that while she might not feel any more comfortable, she was taking care to look more comfortable.

It seemed odd that Maybourne would want to take her to any location - unless it was a tax-free island run by the NID off the Bahamas through which they 'laundered' their tech. But she was pretty sure that they'd banked a couple of times since they lifted off, and for the life of her, she couldn't work out why.

Finally, aware that Maybourne was watching her closely, she turned to him and asked. "Are we going anywhere, or are we just trying to avoid surveillance?"

He grinned. "I was wondering if you'd work it out, Major. It's a lot easier to ensure no prying eyes or listening ears are about when you're thirty thousand feet in the air." A gesture, and two of his men removed themselves from the room but came in a moment later with what looked like a large copper box. He opened it and out rose a little platform with a silvery ball on it. "Do you know what this is?" Maybourne asked as he picked it up.

"A Goa'uld long-range telecommunications device."

He smiled with what passed for a cocky grin for him. "And my organisation didn't have to negotiate for it."

Sam caught the gist of what Maybourne was saying, but she decided that she'd play dumb or cautious for the moment. "NID?"

"Uh...not quite. We're an...offshoot organisation."

"Ah." And that said it all, really. Sam indicated the ball. "So, I take it you operate from off-world and communicate via this?"

"You're sharp, Major."

"Actually, Maybourne, it's Doctor. I'm retired from the Air Force." She didn't have to simulate the tensing of her jaw or the bitterness in her voice. So much that she'd left behind with so little hope of seeing it again. All she had to do was put one foot wrong...

So don't put a foot wrong, snapped her competitive side. You managed to avoid being known as 'General Carter's daughter' through the Academy - and that was no mean feat - you can do this in your sleep!

Maybourne continued, unaware of her thoughts. "Maybe you are. But you could still serve your country and your planet." He smiled. "And I'm too old to change my habits now. How would you like to lead teams through the Stargate, Major? You never had the chance under O'Neill."

"I did once." She thought of the misery of the mission to Tollana. "Twice."

Maybourne rallied well. "You could do it again. On a regular basis." He smiled. "Your reports indicate that both General Hammond and Colonel O'Neill think you're command material."

That was a surprise. "I doubt they hold that opinion anymore," she said, dryly.

"Perhaps. Perhaps not." Maybourne leaned forward, "Whether or not I agree with their methods, Major, I trust their judgement of you. You did well during the foothold situation at the SGC..." For the first time during their discussion, Maybourne looked a little abashed. "I hear you were up for a Presidential commendation for that one."

More surprises. Sam managed a cool little smile, "Perhaps." She shrugged, as if Presidential commendations didn't count for much in her book, "It doesn't make much difference now. Presently, I'm more interested in what you're offering me to work for you."

"Straight to the point. Very well. Leadership of one of the teams that go through the Stargate and pick up pieces like this." He hefted the device in his hand, then set it down on the stand. "It took us a while to work out how to use one of these without a Goa'uld at the helm, but, in the end, good old human ingenuity won out."

The gold surface of the device became translucent and the swirling gold-grey mists parted to show the face of a young man. Possibly of Hispanic background, the expression was personable and intent. "Colonel Maybourne."

"Newman. I'd like you to meet Major Samantha Carter. Retired." There was a hint of gentle mockery in Maybourne's voice as he pronounced the last word.

"Major Carter," Newman seemed impressed. "It's a pleasure to meet you, ma'am. I've read all the SG-1 mission reports, they're very impressive."

"Thank you, Newman."

"I believe we've even met before," the young man continued. "In the hangar of a Utah landing strip."

Sam turned to Maybourne. "So you knew about the Madrona Touchstone all along." She shouldn't have been surprised, really. They'd always suspected that Maybourne had his finger in more pies than just the NID and connections to the SGC.

One more piece to the puzzle.

But quite possibly not the final piece.

She had to find out more.

"Plausible deniability, Major." Maybourne tilted his head at her. "You know the routine."

And she did. What you didn't know, you couldn't tell; and what they thought you didn't know, you wouldn't have to.

"Newman presently heads up the teams going through our Stargate. However, with the extent of your involvement in the Stargate program, and particularly with your experience of command logistics, I think that you'll fit very neatly into the role as outpost commander." Maybourne smiled. "We tend to run things a lot less formally in this operation, Major, but it is your command to run as you see fit within our guidelines."

"Which are?"

"Newman?"

"Use whatever means necessary to obtain goods or technology that could help defend Earth against the Goa'ulds or other unforeseen aggressors."

Sam nodded. Not an entirely unexpected motto given the circumstances under which the SGC had been contacted by the Tollan and the Asgard. Now the interesting question was where they'd gotten hold of these people. She judged Newman to be her junior by some four or five years, and his address of her in the military mode wasn't forced or stumbling. "You're ex-military, aren't you, Newman?"

"That would be classified, Major," Maybourne interrupted before Newman could say anything more.

"If I'm going to work with these people, I'm going to need to know about them."

"You'll get that information upon acceptance of the command," he told her. "So how about it, Major? Ready to take a command which will enable you to achieve what needs to be done for this planet?"

Sam smiled tightly. "Ready." She was more than ready.

"It'll be an honour serving under you, ma'am," Newman said with apparent sincerity. "I'll see you when you arrive on-base."

"Thank you, Newman."

"We'll communicate at the usual time tomorrow."

The young man nodded and the opaque gold swirled back over the device.

Maybourne sat back, watching for her reaction, and Sam sat back, mirroring his pose.

"An off-world base?"

"Sent through before the SGC closed the second Stargate down."

She nodded once in satisfaction at the success of that particular operation - even if they hadn't managed to pin the head of the snake. That was her job now. "And how do you propose that I get to where they are, considering that the second Stargate is now under constant surveillance by the SGC?"

Her new 'commander' grinned. "Through the SGC Stargate, of course!"

And he laid out exactly how.

----

"You can't mean to just...throw away everything you've done here!"

They were in the elevator, headed down to the gate room. Teal'c was a silently disapproving escort in the background; Daniel was a noisily disapproving escort in the foreground.

"Why not, Daniel?" She asked coolly. "The military is a machine. If you don't fit into the pattern, then they don't have a use for you." And they don't have a use for me. Sam didn't say the words, but she felt them. She felt them in the core of her being, a frightened whisper that she refused to allow purchase. Not because they were true: the Air Force did have a use for her right now. But when she was finished... If she finished. If she made it through and got out the other side of the night into the daylight...

Don't think about that now. Think about the mission. That's all that matters now.

Her training helped. She put the fear behind her, what would happen would happen. She had to make it happen right - as much as she could.

"Don't do this, Sam. Please."

And more than anything else, at this moment, she wished she could tell him why she was doing this. Why she'd had to say what she said, do what she'd done.

"Daniel." She injected an amused pity into her voice as the elevator dinged for the gate room floor and the doors slid open. Then she walked past him and out into the corridor beyond.

The corridor leading to the Gate room.

"I'd like to go off-world."

"I don't know that I can permit that, Doctor." In the absence of her military rank, General Hammond addressed her by her academic title.

"The Air Force has no jurisdiction over me anymore, General." It was hard to talk to him, aware of the two men hovering outside the door. At least, Daniel was hovering. Teal'c was standing out in the corridor, listening with eagle ears.

She didn't know where the Colonel was.

"Perhaps not, Ma...Doctor. However, we do have jurisdiction over the Stargate - and your skills and knowledge are too valuable for us to permit to fall into Goa'uld hands."

"I won't be going anywhere near the Goa'uld, sir."

The General looked confused. "Weren't you planning to go to a Tok'ra protected world?"

"Actually, General, I was thinking of Edora."

He blinked. "Edora?"

"Do you recall the blacksmith, sir? The one who asked permission to be taken on a tour of the facility?" While the others had lamented their fate and the fate of those left behind, Hiren had been fascinated by the place his people had come to.

General Hammond's eyes narrowed. "Yes. What about him?"

She felt her cheeks growing warm, "He..."

"I get the picture, Ma...Doctor." The General was grim and Sam hastened to reassure him.

"It was nothing like that, sir. He took an interest in the way the base worked. We were...friends. He said...that I was welcome on Edora any time I cared to visit."

His words had been more thoughtful than that, and prefaced with admiration. "I could never compete against your world, your people. And I do not think I could compete against your friends and the loyalty you hold for them. But part of me wishes otherwise." He smiled wryly. "Should you ever care to visit us, you will be welcome in my household." And he limped up the ramp - lame in leg, and yet strong in spirit.

"And if you're no longer welcome?"

Sam had thought this through. Maybourne had suggested the off world retirement option, she had chosen Edora. Mostly because she had few other options. The Tok'ra were a possibility, but there would have been no question of 'retirement' on Vorash. "The Edorans are rebuilding their culture, sir. A woman of childbearing age, with knowledge that could help develop their standard of living would be welcome in any case."

The General had sighed. "Sam... Your work here has been sufficient to permit me to give you some leeway in this matter, but you know that I can't give you a GDO . Once you're gone, you can't come back. Are you sure you want to do this?"

He met her gaze, both of them knowing what her answer would be. It was the same answer she'd given him when he asked her to take on this mission in the first place.

"Yes, sir. I'm sure."

So now she walked into the crowded gate room as the gate dialled.

Once she stepped through that horizon, she would be on her own. There would be no team to back her up, no organisation to take her fall. It was just her.

It was terrifying.

Yet, as she glanced around at the people assembled in the gate room, Sam felt strangely sustained. These were the people for whom she was undertaking this mission. These were the people who she was closest to in all the universe - not even saving her father or her brother's presence.

And in spite of whatever reservations they had about her recent behaviour, they'd come to say goodbye.

Nobody approached her, but she felt surrounded by them, uplifted. There was a purity to the feeling, a rightness about her actions that she tried to hold onto, even as the final chevron clicked into place - the point-of-origin symbol for Earth.

Home.

The explosion of energy particles into the gate room prickled the hairs on her neck as she shouldered her duffle - all she was taking with her on this mission - although only she and the General knew it was a mission.

Behind her she heard the people milling around as she paused at the foot of the ramp.

She knew her team were there. Daniel stood in the control room, quietly seething, Teal'c might be beside him or up in the briefing room watching from the window, and Sam knew the Colonel was somewhere there. She didn't know how she knew. She just knew.

Others were in the gate room, too; Janet and Siler, the scientists she'd worked with, the young officers she'd tutored. People who'd been a part of her life every day for the last three years coming to wish her the best - no matter what they thought of her actions.

Their presence bolstered her, reminding her that she was doing the right thing - the only thing she could do. They didn't know the truth, but she did. They didn't understand now, but someday they would.

With that thought, Sam began the long climb to the open wormhole leading to more than just Edora.

"SGC salute!"

The rustle of material whispered softly through the room as all the people she'd worked with gave her a salute and she felt tears sting her eyes but didn't wipe them away.

Carters are strong, Sam. They're always the toughest. Her father's voice echoed in her head, a mantra from her teenage years.

Sam had always tried to be strong. And she had succeeded so far.

At the top of the ramp she paused, but didn't turn around. If she turned around and looked for the three men who had shared her life these past years, then she'd never do what she had to do.

One step. That was all it would take. One final, irrevocable step.

She took it.

----

The wormhole expelled her from the other side with a pop. Her 'transition' at Edora had been very brief as she brushed the faint dampness from her eyes and dialled her destination on the DHD: the NID's secret off-world site.

"Major Carter." Newman stepped up to her as she descended the stairs. "How was your trip in?"

"Cold," she noted dryly, taking the opportunity to glance around the room. It was a large room, almost warehouse sized. Overhead, through the clear ceiling, the stormy sky could be seen overhead, clouds roiling and tumbling around in what must have been gale-force winds. But from inside, she could hear nothing of the weather - the air here was still and quiet.

Behind Newman, row upon row of shelves stood, crammed full of all kinds of technologies. The sheer number of them stunned her - there must have been dozens of items here, all taken by stealth or force from various planets in the last two years.

A wealth of technology that the NID had coveted and refused to share.

She kept her anger carefully under control and instead concentrated on the people who gathered behind Newman, quietly observing her.

Her new command - such as it was.

They were a rag-tag bunch. Mostly military according to the files she'd read, one or two were civilians with specialised training. The military people were the wild or rogue cards of the deck. She'd seen and known the type in the academy and during her time out in the Gulf. They had a use during wartime, but during peacetime they tended to turn their energies to troublemaking.

Maybourne had found a better use for those energies.

"We're not exactly the cream of the crop," Newman acknowledged, seeing her glance over the informally assembled people. "But we're very good at what we do."

"Which is basically stealing technology."

"Whatever we need to do to protect our planet, Major." Newman stood his ground and eyeballed her. "Isn't that why they kicked you out?"

Sam quirked a smile. "Point."

The young man's expression eased as he turned to his compatriots. "Guys, this is Major Carter, formerly of SG-1. She's our newest addition to the team, and, depending on how she works out during these first few missions, Maybourne may set her up to run this place since she's seen the SGC in action."

She got a series of fairly solemn nods from the group. One or two individuals smiled a little as they greeted her, but, by and large, they all seemed fairly reserved. Newman went through the names, introducing them one by one. Sam figured she wouldn't remember all of them, but she'd have a decent chance of remembering most of them. Not too many of them stuck out, although she paid careful attention to the names of the older members: Colonel Greaves, Sergeant Rice, and a man of subcontinental descent who gave his name simply as 'Ranjit'. The older ones would have the greatest influence and the best chance of leadership - official or unofficial - and might resent her as the newcomer who was taking over the base. She made a note to try to get them on-side with her.

Judging from the reception she got, Sam gathered most of them would be watching to see how she did on the first couple of missions before they came to a decision about her. They were polite, but cautious.

As Newman took her through the complex, showing her the layout of the base, Sam realised that these people didn't have much reason to love her. After all, her team had put their Earth-based operations out of action and stranded them here. Whatever home, family, friends or loved ones they'd had on Earth, they hadn't seen or heard from in over a year.

She only half-listened as he pointed out the various rooms in the base to her.

For the first time, she felt the pangs of conscience. Not over what she and SG-1 had done in uncovering the existence of the ring but about the consequences that had come about as a result of it. In trying to keep the honour of their planet, they'd had to sacrifice the futures of these people.

In seeking to bring down this smuggling ring - and any others like it, Sam would be handing these people over to the mercy of the USAF, under whose authority the Stargate and all its activities undertaken by Earth bodies fell.

It wasn't a pleasant thought.

But no more pleasant than the thought of the millions of lives wiped out by the Goa'uld motherships. Without the Asgard-Goa'uld treaty, Earth was defenceless before the power of the Goa'uld. And the Tollan might not exactly be allies as far as sharing weapons technology, but their goodwill might mean the difference between annihilation and survival.

And that was what her mission was about.

With her reasons justified in her mind, Sam tuned in more fully to what her guide was telling her as they headed down another corridor.

"...and these are the living quarters. Most people share a room with one other person, but some of us get our own rooms. You'll get your own, for one." Newman gave her a cocky grin, "It doesn't do for the base commander to have to share quarters, after all."

Her 'quarters' were nothing more than a room with an attached bathroom, spartan in its simplicity. Teal'c had more furniture - if only in his candles. "It'll do," she conceded as she dumped her duffle on the bed. "Does the operation of the base take up all the time around here?" There had to be more to the complex than rooms where people were squeezed in and sent off on missions.

"Major, all work and no play make the people on this base very dull indeed - and we have to live with each other all the time - although we have a planet or two where people are allowed to go off-duty." Newman grinned. "Since the Committee for Appropriations isn't looking over our shoulder at the electricity bill, we don't have to keep an eye on our Stargate use like the SGC does."

Sam smiled. "I can see how that would be handy. Is there any more of the complex to see?"

"There is, but it'll have to wait until later. Colonel Maybourne is due to call us in ten minutes." He held the door open for her to go through. "The Colonel contacts us for a basic report. Senior operative usually gives it, now that you're here, that'll probably be you. Colonel Greaves hasn't been doing too bad a job, but he's not exactly a people-person." There was a wry note in Newman's voice as he described the Colonel.

Thinking back to the middle-aged man who'd nodded briefly and tersely at her, Sam allowed herself a faint half-smile. "Do you have a rank, Newman?"

"I was a Captain." She noted the past tense. "Dishonourable discharge." He didn't tell her any more and she didn't pry, but she did see the measuring look he gave her. "Not surprised?"

"I never said that," she replied easily.

"So what were you thinking, Major?"

She considered her words carefully, "I was thinking that you were the kind of person who would do well in whatever field they chose - as long as the field of expertise didn't require rigid adherence to the rules."

The grin he gave her was broad, "That about sums it up." They passed a set of rooms where the steady pounding of punching bags could be heard. "That's the gym. Some of the equipment is makeshift, but it works to keep us fit and healthy. We have two doctors on the base - and while they're probably not quite as knowledgeable as Docs Fraiser and Warner of the SGC," Newman quirked a grin, "They're good at patching us up when things don't work out as nicely as they should."

"Have there been any casualties?"

"Not yet. We usually operate by stealth. If we're met by natives, we usually play the 'SGC team' game, scope out their tech and if any of it's useful, we take it. Most of the time they don't even know what it does." Newman shrugged. "So they hardly miss it."

Which was quite incorrect, Sam thought. Someone had missed the technology and complained to whatever race was looking after them.

He led her to a room off the gate room, with a couple of comfortable chairs and the long-range communications device sitting in a stand on the table. "Like a crystal ball," Newman joked as he took one of the seats.

"How often are these meetings?"

"Once every two days. Our focus is more on the research than on the exploratory aspect - we don't have the resources to do what the SGC does regarding the Goa'uld. If our teams encounter a Goa'uld or Goa'uld forces, the first priority is to get out of there."

"What about natives?"

Newman held his hands out, "This is the only base we have off-world, Major. We don't have the resources to fight the Goa'uld on a scale that you do. Our primary commitment is to Earth and Earth's defences - and once we're secure there, then we can help other planets." He glanced at the surface of the gold ball, gold and white mists swirling around in its depths. "Ah, here's the Colonel."

Maybourne's smug face filled the volume of the device, "Major Carter, how's the tour of the base going?"

"Very well, Colonel," she said. "You've got quite an operation running here."

"It's small but effective," Maybourne said proudly. "We're doing good work, Major, and I'm sure you'll become accustomed to the routine. In the meantime, how about we send you out and show you what we're doing?"

She shrugged, indicating that she was fine, "Sounds good to me, sir. Have to learn the ropes sometime." And the more she knew, the more they'd be able to stop this from going anywhere else. While it seemed that this was the only off-world outpost, they had to be sure. There was no point in catching this nest of rats and then finding themselves facing another infestation in another six months.

"Willing to take some advice, Major?" Maybourne's slight hesitancy surprised her and it must have showed her face, because he added, "We run things slightly different here, as I said. I mostly give advice, not orders."

Sam noted the use of the term 'mostly'. "So I see. If the advice is worth taking, I take it."

"Let Newman or one of the other experienced personnel lead the mission the first few times. Ease yourself into our way of doing things. Certainly there are things that can be improved - that's where your experience in the running of the SGC will come in handy - but let's start slowly and work up from there."

Sam nodded agreement. "Sounds reasonable."

Maybourne and Newman fell into a quick briefing about the next planet they were to visit. An agrarian society, no links to the Goa'uld for what they thought was several thousand years, but children's rumours of 'magic troves', dismissed by the adults, but quite possibly what they were looking for.

Sam listened to the plans, one part of her filing away all the relevant information, while another part quietly noted that it seemed a very clumsy way of doing business. Although, she reminded herself, this outpost didn't have half the resources of the SGC and they weren't able to run things quite the way the SGC could.

And why am I looking at ways to improve the running of this base? I'm not going to be here very long, and I have nothing vested in these people. I can't have anything vested in them - I'm going to take their operation down. Ultimately, this base would be dismantled, their research taken back through the gate to the SGC, and these men and women would end up in jail for treason.

"I'll be in contact in two days time. Take Major Carter out on the next mission," Maybourne regarded Sam with no small measure of amusement. "Good luck on the first time out, Major."

"Thank you, sir."

----

Sam took her time exploring the rest of the base. While she didn't anticipate being here more than a week, both prudence and curiosity required she take a good look around the place.

She had to admit, the setup was very neat. Whoever designed the place had skipped the recreational and the more complex exercise facilities since they had an entire universe in which to spend R&R time. That left more room for the functions of the base - a good trade-off since the base was only about half the size of the SGC and the personnel of this place lived here twenty-four-by-seven - or whatever the hours and days of the week were.

The main concession to on-base recreation was the computer network set up in the server room.

"Diablo II?" Sam asked Newman, amused as they peered in on the four oblivious gamers. Whites, blues, reds, and greens illuminated the intent faces of the players hunched protectively over their keyboards. The whirr of the air conditioner and the tap-tap-tap of keys were the only sounds in the room - apart from the occasional yelp as a player was shot or scored a hit against someone or something else.

"You don't play?"

"No." She'd never had the patience for computer games. There were too many other things to do with her time.

"Well, there are other recreational activities," Newman said. "Whatever your preference."

"Most of my 'recreational' time tends to be spent in the labs," she admitted, wryly. Certainly, in the last couple of months, all her spare time had been spent in her lab, trying to get the particle accelerator working.

As she turned back to the corridor, she caught Newman studying her. Doubtless he'd heard about her efforts to get the particle accelerator going from Colonel Maybourne and was wondering about whether the rumours about Colonel O'Neill and her were true.

She ignored it, as she'd ignored many other questions and innuendos in the last three months, and he quirked a grin at her.

"Then we'll head for the labs, Major."

The labs were larger and busier than she'd anticipated, personnel standing in groups quietly tossing ideas back and forth. They looked up as she entered, obviously startled by her presence.

"Major Carter," one of the women stepped forward. "Lieutenant Jess Holland. It's truly an honour to meet you, ma'am." She was fairly young, probably in her late twenties, Sam judged. Bold enough to want to introduce herself rather than be introduced, young enough to believe that she was interesting to all who listened to her, enthusiastic enough to get away with it.

Sam opened her mouth to give an appropriately amused answer.

"Oh you can quit sucking up, Holland," interrupted another woman. "She's in here for the same stuff that we are. Getting caught with her fingers in the cookie jar." Dark eyes looked pointedly at Sam, who allowed a little of her amusement and none of her offence to show.

"But weren't the cookies worth it?" She asked, looking around at the things standing on the sideboards of the lab.

"Depends," said Dark-Eyes. "On what we had to give up when you and your toy-boys rained on our parade."

Sam felt her eyebrows arching, and projected amusement into her voice. "Boy-toys?" One corner of her mouth pulled out and up. "That's the first time I've heard my team-mates referred to as 'boy-toys'." At least in my hearing, although I wouldn't put it past some of the nurses...

"Some of us had lives before you and your saintly friends made it impossible for us to go home again, Major," Dark-Eyes spat.

"Helen," Newman said.

Helen ignored the warning. "Friends, families, children... Husbands."

Sam felt the longing edge of Helen's words like knives in her flesh. The sting operation had been over a year ago, and whatever the motives of these people, they were still humans with people they loved. People they'd been forced to leave behind when the operations got stranded off-world.

And, unbeknownst to them, their world was going to be up-ended once again when she revealed their covert operations for the second time.

"She's in the same boat as us now, Helen," Lieutenant Holland reminded the angry woman. "And whatever she had back at home, that's gone to her now, too. We're all stuck here, doing our duty - and that includes Major Carter." The Lieutenant managed a slightly hesitant smile. "Right, Major?"

The moment she took to regain her composure was no act. Whatever she had back at home was gone to her and she was stuck here doing her duty. And even once she'd done her duty, she wasn't sure she'd have anything to go back to.

Sure, she'd have a career and a commendation from General Hammond and whoever else had authorised this - but she was desperately afraid that she wouldn't have a team anymore. After what she'd said and done to ensure that there was enough distance for her to carry out her mission, she didn't think there'd be forgiveness for her actions.

So the smile on her lips was a little sad when it came. "That's right, Lieutenant."

"See?" The Lieutenant returned at Helen.

Helen just grunted and picked herself and her papers up and stalked out of the lab. Lieutenant Holland looked a little abashed. "I'm sorry about her attitude, ma'am. She's been like this for a while now."

"When we were stranded here, Helen left behind a husband and two children," Newman explained, leaning his hip against the desk. There was a sardonic expression on his face as he spoke. "She's since discovered that her husband has remarried, believing her dead."

Sam winced. That was a pretty fast remarriage. "Did most people here have family or partners they had to leave behind?" She asked softly.

"Some. Not all," Lieutenant Holland said. The young woman didn't appear to have left anyone she considered important behind. "We knew the risks when we got involved with this project, sometimes it costs you some, sometimes it costs you none." A shrug and a grin. "And some of us get more out of it than we ever would have gotten otherwise. Would you like to see the lab and some of the stuff we're working on?"

A glance at Newman produced a wry smile and a wave of the hand. "From all reports, we'd have a hard time keeping you out of the labs, Major. I'll leave you guys to it."

Jess Holland looked like she was about to bounce, "You're going to love the stuff we're working on here, ma'am! Even the SGC doesn't get a look at this kind of tech..."

As the Lieutenant took her through the labs, introducing her to the various personnel who worked in the labs, Sam learned that almost everyone on the base went out on missions and they all had a secondary role.

"For some of us, our primary role is going through the Stargate - Newman and several of the older ones are like that. Then there are those of us who mostly stay 'at home', so to speak. Ranjit's the only one who doesn't go out on any off-world missions. He prefers to stay on the base - one trip through the wormhole to get here was enough for him."

"And you're one of the people with a science background."

"Yup," Holland said proudly. "I did hope to get into the SGC, but they'd reached their quota and weren't looking for any other applicants at the time. My application for Area 51 was knocked back, but while I was considering other postings, Colonel Maybourne approached me and I ended up as part of this group."

It didn't seem to bother Holland that what she was doing amounted to stealing. Just like it didn't occur to her that taking the technology was in breach of the treaty with both Asgard and Tollan - and what that could mean for Earth.

Sam wondered if that was a tunnel vision the young woman had possessed at the start, or if it had been encouraged by the NID when they brought her to this base.

The young woman proudly showed Sam around the labs, nearly glowing with delight and enthusiasm as she explained the purpose of each of the items on the bench. The other scientists in the labs came and went, some listening to Holland's explanation and correcting her from time to time when her enthusiasm outstripped her knowledge, some merely nodding at Sam and getting on with their work.

Sam was fascinated by the technology, even as she was aware of how everything here had been obtained. Wasn't there some old quote about fruit stolen from the vine tasting sweeter? Certainly the stuff they had stored here was enough to make any scientist seriously consider theft as a living - if this was the result.

Even her.

Her attention was captured as Holland showed her an anti-grav device, explaining how the material in the device created a 'nullifying field' where an artificial gravitational pull could be generated. As yet, the people working on the device hadn't come up with a solution that would enable things like 'walk on wall' boots, but they were looking into it.

"Have many advances come out of these articles?" Sam asked, pondering the device and the many others around them. If they were all as inscrutable as this item, then the research would be hard going.

"Quite a few, actually," the Lieutenant sounded excited. "Have you ever seen 'Terminator 2', Major?"

Sam cautiously admitted that she had.

"In 'Terminator 2', the black guy who's the head of the technology company talks about the chip they took from the first Terminator. He said that it was damaged beyond repair, but it still gave them ideas they'd never had before. That's kinda like what's happening here." No doubt about it, Lieutenant Holland was excited about this kind of breakthrough. "We may not be able to exactly copy what they've done to produce the tech, but we've gotten ideas that are so far beyond anything that's been thought before - it's absolutely incredible..."

It was hard not to smile at the younger woman's enthusiasm and passion for this work - or not to feel an answering echo in her own psyche, even as she felt the swift pang of pity for the Lieutenant. When this base was closed down, Jess Holland would rot in a federal prison. A young woman who had wanted nothing more than to work on exciting new challenges would find herself working on nothing. Unwanted by any base or place that might have anything near as complex as this kind of technology.

Something occurred to her.

"You get all this stuff from other cultures, right?"

"Well it certainly doesn't turn up in the mail," the Lieutenant said with a touch of asperity. Her expression turned contrite as she remembered who she was speaking to. "Ma'am, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be disrespectful..."

Sam waved the girl silent. At this point in time she was more interested in how they procured the items and what happened after they'd researched them. "Be more careful of your phrasing next time, Lieutenant. Once you've gotten the tech and studied how it works - then what? All this knowledge doesn't do Earth a lot of good just sitting around here."

"No, ma'am, it doesn't." Now there was a touch of smugness in the Lieutenant's expression. "We have people in place on outgoing SG-teams who are contacted by Colonel Maybourne about pickups. With some advance knowledge of which teams are going to which planets, it's possible for us to hide the items near the Stargate on a planet that our contact will be travelling through. The smaller items can be easily hidden in packs or flak jackets, but we make schematics of the larger items and store them on data files or in hardcopy diagrams."

It was clever. It was more than clever, it was brilliantly organised and executed. Sam had to give them that. This base had operated in secret for over a year, gaining technological advances through theft and lies - and it had done it well.

Now it was her job to bring the card tower tumbling down with a mere puff of air.

"Major?" Holland had noticed her glassy silence and was looking at her with concern. "Are you okay?"

Sam managed a smile. "I'm fine, Lieutenant. Thank you for asking. It's been a long day..."

"Oh, of course! You'll want to lie down and take it all in." The young woman began escorting her to the door. "Do you need help getting to your quarters, ma'am? It can be very confusing at first - I know I wandered around for ages before I worked out how it all went..."

She assured the helpful Lieutenant that no assistance was necessary and made her way slowly through the base, accepting the nods and greetings from the few personnel she met along the way.

There were no more reactions like Helen's, but Sam felt the criticism of the other woman like salt in a wound. She felt the echo of that loneliness and abandonment in her own soul - the sense than she was in exile, unforgiven, unredeemed.

And this exile had been her choice. Helen's had not.

If she'd been trapped here by the results of someone else's choices, would she have been as bitter as Helen?

She didn't know the answer, and that scared her.

The material of her door wasn't metal - it seemed like some kind of a mesh weave - but when it closed behind her, she could no longer hear the sounds of the base. She flung herself down on the pallet, pulled the blanket up over her body, and took a long, deep breath.

She was alone.

Of course, she had to assume that she was under surveillance, even in here. They might suspect something, they might not, but she had to act as if she was constantly being watched. The ultimate performance.

She was alone.

No backup here, no support. Just her, flying on borrowed wings, hoping she could keep herself aloft, praying that she wouldn't betray the hopes of General Hammond, the Asgard and the Tollan.

She was very much alone.

Praying that she could make it through in one piece and go home.

Praying that the bridges between her and her team-mates were merely singed, not incinerated.

This operation had been her choice, but it was not her preference.

In the darkness, questions arose in her mind. Faced with the reality of the people whose work she was sabotaging, Sam no longer knew if she was doing the right thing.

Was it necessary? Yes. Earth needed the treaty with the Asgard and the goodwill of the Tollan.

But was it right?

In the darkness, the people she loved were a million miles distant from her and nearly twice that distant in spirit, Sam felt a yawning emptiness inside herself.

In the last two weeks, all the things she'd assumed were there for her had crumbled away.

She'd put all her energy and time into completing the particle accelerator, only knowing she missed his presence. The question of whether he wanted to return never occurred to her. She'd never thought he might give up hope of being rescued - that he'd question his value and assume they wouldn't try to get him back.

In the face of the answers, the mission had been a relief. Something else to take her attention, to draw her focus. The backwash of regrets and bitter hurt could be forgotten as she took up the next challenge and soldiered on.

Of course, she suspected they'd just be waiting for her when she got back. If she got back.

If she went back.

And suddenly a new avenue opened up to her.

I could stay here.

That thought died swiftly, put to death by her own practicality.

She couldn't stay here doing something she knew was wrong. She couldn't aid and abet the possible destruction of Earth through her actions in abandoning the agreements with their allies.

She was trapped.

In a way, Sam was trapped by other people's choices - by the choices of Helen, Jess Holland, Newman, the people who had come here, the people who had stayed behind to form the bridge back to the SGC, Colonel Maybourne.

They had chosen to steal technology from their allies instead of accepting their decision not to share technology directly, but give them the benefits of an alliance.

But she had also come here by her own choice.

Her choices were made, her bridges were burned, there was no turning back, bleak as the landscape before her was. Maybe there was indeed a promised haven beyond the wasteland, but she couldn't see it now and nobody could assure her that it was still there.

Slowly, the weight of everything on her shoulders crushed down on her, and she slept, but restlessly.

----

The new planet was a refreshing change after the artificiality of the base.

She'd gone through the rules of operation for the base early this morning when she woke and couldn't get back to sleep again. The lack of sleep made her tired, but the purpose of her presence here burned within her.

Around her, it was a crisp, chill morning. Trees yearned up to the sky - an intense royal blue colour. The sight had excited one of the scientists who promptly launched into a discourse about the probable atmospheric qualities of the planet.

Newman tugged his beanie down over his ears with an audible sigh and started walking, leaving Captain McCabe behind to catch up.

Sam grinned in spite of herself. There was a certain familiarity here - she couldn't count the number of times Daniel had started babbling about something the instant they hit the planet - or the number of times the Colonel had walked away without bothering to listen.

She knew of her own tendencies to 'techno babble' at the Colonel, but when they first arrived on a planet, she was usually more concerned about their military position than anything scientific - although there were always exceptions.

"Less chatter, McCabe," she said firmly. "Mission priority."

McCabe nodded with a decidedly sheepish look on his face. "Yes, ma'am."

"It's about two klicks that way to the nearest village," Newman indicated with one hand as Sam came alongside him. "But the caves we're exploring are on the other side of the village and we don't really want to alert the villagers to what we're doing..."

"So it's the long road for us," said the fourth member of their group - a Sergeant by the name of Franklins - as he shouldered his pack and headed off in the direction Newman had indicated.

Captain McCabe followed after, pulling out a tape recorder from his pocket and beginning to record his thoughts on the exploration.

"Does he do that all the time?" Sam inquired of Newman as they followed Franklins and McCabe.

"The recording? Yeah. He says it helps cement his impressions of the planet." Newman shrugged. "To each his own."

They walked through damp grass, the long strands sticking to their fatigues pants. Sam made a mental note to ask where the rogue group got their supplies from. There was no way they could appropriate this kind of stuff regularly over long-term, and, hard-wearing though fatigues might be, they didn't last forever.

And she still didn't know who the contacts within the SGC were.

She had to find out.

They didn't say much on the walk to the cave, starting only small conversations that were swiftly dealt with, leaving silence behind it.

The silence was unusual to Sam. On SG-1, there was almost always someone talking. Usually Daniel, although Sam was as guilty of talk as her team-mate. But Daniel would talk with anyone who would talk back to him - unless he was sulking, in which case he wouldn't talk to anyone. The Colonel, too, enjoyed conversation that was apropos of nothing in particular - which could be very amusing when Sam was in the mood to be entertained, and intensely frustrating when she wasn't.

Still, she wasn't sure about the tension in the air - her presence? The natives' hostility? Their own preoccupations?

They walked on, their boots squishing gently in the soft earth, leaving clear prints behind should anyone look along the trail of bent-and-broken grass in the meadow.

The chain of caves began in the hills, where the old rocky bones of the planet had split the fertile skin of the earth to jut through in a spine of mountains that apparently ran for several miles. They climbed a little way into the hills and were all breathing slightly harder when Sam saw the outline of what must be the cave mouth.

"Franklin, you're on watch. Major Carter, McCabe, you're with me."

They pulled out their flashlights, shining them into the dark. The caves seemed fairly empty right now, but that could easily change.

The opening of the cave was well-hidden, but the track inside it was worn.

"What were these caves used for?"

"They used to hide here when the Goa'uld came," Newman explained, his low voice echoing in the cave. "They were originally under Asgard protection - but something happened and the Goa'uld took them as slaves and brought them here. They retained some of the Asgard's technology - and we're hoping that some of it might still be useful to us."

"You haven't found many Asgard items?" Sam inquired.

It was MacCabe who answered her. "The Asgard are very protective of their technology. It's hard to get hold of anything."

"But something like this - overlooked, hopefully forgotten - it might be just what we're looking for."

It turned out to be exactly what they were looking for. A small stone-like item, somewhat resembling the half-egg 'control keys' Sam had seen in the chamber at Cimmeria. Some fiddling around with it showed its true purpose - to make the holder invisible.

Sam regarded the device with no small amount of amazement as Newman winked in and out of visibility like some military-dressed djinn.

There were some things, she suspected, that they would never be able to reverse-engineer - Asgard technology being one of them. It was just...alien. A completely different line of science to any they'd seen before on Earth. That wouldn't stop them from taking it and using it, of course - and maybe over time, they'd work out how the device worked and develop a substitute for it using Earth technology.

McCabe, at least, was very pleased with the find. He vanished from view, and a disembodied voice said he'd meet them outside the cave. They heard his steps scrambling up the slope - doubtless his intent was to give Franklin a shock.

Newman shook his head. "We should send one of the technical drafting teams here. This stuff is probably too bulky to move easily, but it would be worth our time to pull it apart and see if we can get some technical specs."

"We do that as well?"

He gave her a quick smile by the dim light of their torches. "We're a multi-talented bunch."

"So I see."

She gave one last glance around the room, then began the ascent back up to the mouth of the cave where Franklin was scowling at a broadly-grinning McCabe.

The daylight's brightness hurt her eyes and she slipped on her shades to block out the glare as Newman said, "Well, we found what we wanted. How about we head back?"

The journey back was more talkative than the one there. Captain McCabe recorded his ideas on the technology, interspersed with comments from Newman and Franklins, and Sam found herself drawn into the discussion about the possible means by which the device operated.

It was all speculation, of course, but it was decidedly enjoyable speculation. For a little while, Sam could forget she was on a mission at all, and just think that she was temporarily seconded to another team and laughing with them as they returned to base after finding some new item of technology.

Of course, once she stepped through the wormhole and found herself in what she was coming to think of as the rogue Stargating complex, that illusion was dispelled.

She changed and showered briskly and wearily. Now she needed to start collecting information - the people who were in sympathy with Maybourne and these people in the SGC. There was no point in cutting off the head of the beast if it merely grew another in a location more difficult to reach.

There was one shot at killing this monster, and she needed to be sure she'd gotten everyone.

They had to have some kind of database about who their contacts were at the SGC. Except, Sam realised as the hot spray washed over her skin, it was probably Colonel Maybourne who had the complete list since he would be the one to co-ordinate the pickups.

Sam would just have to make sure she was present for a pickup.

----

"You're sure about this?" Newman asked her.

She nodded. "I need to know the basics of this command from the ground up. Which means doing it at least once." That was Colonel O'Neill's mandate, and Sam had no doubt he'd done almost everything that was within his ability to do at least once. "It's no difficulty. I go in, plant the item, get out of there."

It should have been easy.

Wasn't there some old saying about the best-laid plans never lasting the first engagement?

The planet on which the pickup was taking place was beautiful. Compared with the barren harshness of the rogue base, Balesh was a lush green paradise.

Sam didn't waste any time in putting the wrapped package beneath a rock at the base of the DHD. According to Newman, their contact at the SGC would know to fetch the device from there.

Now, she just had to find an excuse to stay behind a little longer.

As it turned out, she didn't have to.

Chevrons began lighting up on the Stargate even as she turned, and she made a dash for the treeline. It was the work of a few moments to find herself a vantage point from which she could see the Stargate, the DHD, and the package hidden at its base. The binoculars stashed away in her pack would give her a clearer view of what was happening - whether this was an SGC team coming through, or someone or something else.

The Stargate burst open with its customary display of light and energy particles, and Sam watched as it settled to the shimmering blue surface of the event horizon.

She was too far to hear the noise that the surface made as the people came through, but not so distant that she couldn't recognise the men who came through. There was no mistaking their gaits, or the very distinctive way they moved.

SG-1 had been sent to pick up the package.

Her spirits sank.

Not them. Not these guys - I trusted them!

Her first reaction was denial. There was no way that any of her team-mates would get involved in something like this. The Colonel was too honourable, Daniel was too direct, and Teal'c held no love for the NID.

Still, in the last few days, she had come to believe that anything was possible of anyone. And if she could go so far out of her way as to go undercover to flush out a mole, then wasn't it possible that one of her team-mates might see a more direct way to achieve the goals they'd been striving for these last few years?

Maybe. Maybe not.

There was always the Lieutenant who accompanied them, blonde, tall and lanky with a focused air about her. Sam remembered her vaguely from the labs - Claire Tobias. Very driven, but with a reserve about her that rebuffed friendly overtures.

She could always hope.

At the Colonel's order, they wandered off in the opposite direction to where Sam had ensconced herself, and she breathed a sigh of relief. At least this wouldn't be a game of hide and seek.

Still, their presence here made her very nervous with a dry-throat, heart-drumming kind of terror. Terror that seized her on several levels.

It wasn't just that SG-1 had been sent to pick up the package, it was also that they were early. The information being received by the rogues was incorrect, which could cause trouble for Sam on several levels. Sam didn't know any of the rogue personnel by sight and doubted that any of the personnel from SGC Stargating teams would know them by sight. However, Sam was a different matter.

If this incorrect information was symptomatic of the data being received by the rogues, then Sam was in a very real danger of having both her cover and her career blown. If she arrived on a planet too late and was caught by the team, then she'd have no chance of reintegrating into the rogue group, nor of catching the person passing information from the SGC.

SG-1 took several hours to finish their task - several hours during which Sam started at every snapped twig or crackled leaf. A little nervous there, Major?

Maybe just a little.

She tried to occupy her mind with plans and options, to move now or to wait until she had more complete data, but it was difficult. She missed the guys. She missed her team. She missed the teasing and the camaraderie, the care they'd shown her - particularly Teal'c and Daniel those months when she'd worked herself into the ground. She missed the Colonel's drawl at her door, 'Wanna get some cake?' And the way he made spaces seem smaller with the chained energy of his personality.

At length, their voices grew closer again, and she raised her binoculars to check out the guys. The Colonel was saying something to Lieutenant Tobias who was regarding him with amusement. His gaze occasionally ranged over the countryside, but apart from that, he seemed at ease with the new team member.

Sam felt a brief pang in her chest as she contemplated the idea that she was replaceable - on SG-1, in the lives of her friends. Maybe there wouldn't be a team to return to once she was done here.

The depressing thoughts were doing nothing for her attitude, so she banished them and concentrated on the package and her former team-mates.

Teal'c was standing further away from the Stargate than the others, but his gaze was ranging over the landscape, as if sensing that something wasn't quite right. Sam didn't move. She'd been lucky enough to find a hiding spot distant enough so Teal'c couldn't sense her through the naquadah in their bloodstreams, but Teal'c was exceptionally sensitive to his surroundings and might spot her anyway.

She could hope he didn't.

Daniel was already at the DHD, dialling home. He seemed out of sorts, his face had that peculiar tight expressionlessness that she associated with Daniel in a bad temper.

As he reached up to get one of the higher buttons on the DHD, his foot touched the stone under which the package was hidden. Sam held her breath, hoping he didn't do anything more. Since Sha're's death, Daniel had become increasingly bitter, the bitterness held back by the thinnest of threads. It was entirely possible that the thread had snapped and Sam had just never noticed. But she hoped to God and whatever deities might be out there that Daniel wasn't implicated in this.

He moved away from the DHD without giving the rocks at the bottom of the pedestal a second look. As he lifted his arm to aim the GDO at the event horizon, Teal'c turned towards the DHD but didn't make a move towards it. Instead, he went to help Daniel Jackson with the large silver equipment box.

That still left Colonel O'Neill or Lieutenant Tobias.

It was very smooth in the end. Lieutenant Tobias bent to tie her shoelace by the DHD and picked up the packet, unaware that Sam was watching her from across the clearing.

One down, several to go.

As SG-1 vanished through the wormhole, Sam rested her head against the bole of the tree behind which she hid. A little while later, she heard the event horizon dissipate and heaved herself up. Her muscles ached a little, stiff from being in the same position for several hours. As she stretched, she considered the situation with the traitors inside the SGC.

Lieutenant Tobias couldn't be the only traitor in the SGC. Simple common sense dictated that there must be others. For starters, the rogues would need someone with a significant degree of clearance to get the information about who was going where. That meant one of the team leaders - at the very least a Major or one of the senior Aides.

How deep did this go, anyway? Sam had no idea and neither did the people who had assigned her to this mission. That had been part of her mission - work out how deep it all went so her superiors could excise it, leaf, stem, and root.

She dialled the rogues planet and went through without a second thought, only to find a dozen guns pointed at her on the other side of the wormhole.

Her astonishment only lasted a moment. There were a thousand reasons that they were pointing weapons at her, and only one of them was because she'd been found out. "Newman, what is this?" She demanded of the young man, deciding that a commanding officer's ire would hold up considerably better than an immediate assumption that they knew all about her mission to reveal them.

"Weapons down," he said, not without some relief. "Good to see you back, Major Carter."

"It's good to be back," she responded as she came down the stairs. One hand indicated the personnel putting their weaponry away. "What's with the warm welcome?"

Newman glanced around the room, "You've been away four hours. We feared the worst..."

Sam grimaced, pulling off her cap and scrubbing her hand through her hair - it would be due for a haircut shortly. "Whoever's passing you information needs to check their timetable. I was on my way back when the SGC team arrived - had to hide out until they'd gone." She dusted her hands and the cap off and exhaled. She could do with a nice long shower right about now. The stress of the mission had really gotten to her.

"Close shave, huh?"

"And then some..." Sam was interrupted by a shout from Lieutenant Holland.

"The tech!"

They turned, even as a large piece of tech vanished from one of the shelves in a blur of white light. Sam blinked as another two items stored on the shelves vanished. Damn. Thor, what are you doing? This isn't enough time...I haven't found everyone out... Unfortunately, this part of the mission was running to the Asgard's schedule - not Sam's. She gritted her teeth as she made her way over to the DHD and began dialling.

She hadn't planned her exit this soon, but it seemed that the Asgard were pre-empting the conclusion of her time undercover. At this point, she only really had one choice...

"What are you doing?" Newman came up beside her. "You're not supposed to..."

Sam punched him in the jaw with a right hook, catching him unawares and off-balance. He fell to the floor, permitting her to finish dialling the address of her destination.

As the event horizon billowed out, she turned to address the stunned rogue Stargaters looking from her to Newman. "I think the game is up. That," she indicated as another item vanished in a beam of light, "is Asgard transporter technology." She indicated the Stargate behind her. "I won't be staying here, and you're welcome to join me where I'm going. However, I'll be holding the door open from the other end so you won't be able to dial out again. You've got two choices: my way or the Asgard's way."

And without a further word, she plunged into the event horizon, trusting that the Asgard had given the signal to General Hammond and that she wasn't about to end up splattered across the back of the iris.

Please, please, please, please...

The wormhole spat her out with a 'glop'.

The SGC's gate room was crowded with people - among them the newly-returned SG-1. It seemed that General Hammond had roused most of the SGC's special forces population to the Gate room to receive the rogue Stargaters - and one departed Major. Their weapons trained on her with perfect accuracy, but even from behind the muzzles she could see their astonishment at her presence - the face of someone they'd thought was gone.

Sam didn't move completely out of the event horizon. Instead, she left her arm in the buffer zone of the Stargate, preventing it from closing. Her arm had made the transfer through the wormhole, but wasn't yet rematerialised on the other end. She could only hope the wormhole wouldn't unexpectedly close down on her - otherwise, she'd get an unplanned amputation from the elbow down.

A moment later, the first of the rogues emerged from the Stargate and halted at the top of the ramp in astonishment. At the hailing of the PA, he went down the ramp, glancing over at Sam in surprise. Comprehension took time to dawn on this one. It wasn't until the SF was binding his wrists that he realised the deception practised upon him.

One by one, the others came through. Some took longer to realise that the betrayers had been betrayed in turn, some, like Lieutenant Holland, realised it mere moments after landing on the ramp. Her accusing gaze turned to Sam, but she accepted the bindings placed upon her without a further word.

Within herself, Sam levelled what she'd had to do against what the Asgard and Tollan would have done if she hadn't intervened. Did she regret it? Yes. She'd made promises with the intent of breaking them.

Would she do it again?

In a heartbeat.

The last of the rogue Stargaters emerged from the wormhole and Sam pulled her arm from the buffer zone, ending the wormhole's open state and shutting it down. On the floor below, the marines of SG-3 were putting bindings on the rogue Stargaters one by one. Over in the corner, SG-1 gaped at their returned team-mate in disbelief.

Sam merely glanced over the guys - she focused on Tobias, whose blue eyes were both shocked and a little suspicious. She could call Tobias on the matter now, or she could wait - and maybe use the Lieutenant as the stalking horse for whoever else in the SGC was in this racket.

The voice inside her urged caution. She would deal with Tobias later - the Lieutenant was presently more useful as bait than imprisoned. General Hammond, the Tollan, and the Asgard would need to be told that they hadn't cut the head off the serpent yet, but they could wait a little longer.

And, if she was honest with herself, Sam wasn't ready to go back to SG-1 just yet.

So she turned away from her former team-mates and walked up to General Hammond.

As she passed, one of the rogues spat at her feet. Helen. "Knew you were up to something. Bitch."

Sam didn't say a thing - she didn't have to. Helen was the one in bindings. Sam had just done her job. Did she feel guilty? Yes. She had lied and deceived to get the job done. But if not her, then someone else would have been brought in to betray them. What had been required had been achieved. What was done was done.

It was results that mattered, not how you achieved them. Wasn't that right?

"Sir." Mission accomplished. The words stuck in her throat. She couldn't get them out.

And maybe he sensed that her mission wasn't accomplished, for he merely nodded. "Well done, Major." His gaze ranged out over the expressions of the rogue Stargating teams as he addressed them. "People, you're being transported to Petersen Air Base where you will be incarcerated awaiting your trials."

"Trials?" Newman demanded, "For what? For obeying orders?"

"For breaking the terms of treaty with our allies," Hammond said. He was calm and authoritative - two things that Sam didn't feel right now.

Newman snorted. "Allies that won't give us anything with which to defend ourselves!"

"And who would defend us against them when they took offence at our thieving?" Sam asked back, her voice dragging the attention of the others. "We need them, Newman."

"You'll get what's coming to you, Major!" Helen spat, back along the line. "And you'll wish you hadn't betrayed us!"

There was nothing Sam could say in response to the threat. Hammond nodded at the SFs and the rogues were led out, leaving Sam standing at the base of the ramp, feeling very much distant and alienated from the people she'd once worked with.

If she'd been the Colonel, then she would have responded with something open and easy, trying to smooth everything over. If she'd been Daniel, she would have blustered her way through whatever her team-mates had to bring against her. If she'd been Teal'c, she would have pointed at the necessity, the duty of what she'd had to do.

She was not them.

She was Major Sam Carter who'd said bitter, terrible things to alienate them and had no means of building bridges to get back to where she'd been. Because to push them from her, she'd needed to use against them the very trust they'd placed in her.

And that was the way it was.

----

"You're telling me that we haven't caught all Maybourne's accomplices?" The general asked in disbelief.

Sam understood how he felt. She felt the same way. She was weary and tired of the deception, and not looking forward to going back to SG-1 to boot.

Her team-mates were furious at the deception. She didn't need to do anything more than glimpse at their faces to see that. The Colonel looked as though he was simmering, with only a few degrees more required before he boiled over. Daniel's face was set in stubborn, rigid lines, an indication of how much he hated being in the dark. And while Teal'c's expression changed little, Sam knew he was disconcerted by the turnaround of the situation.

Lieutenant Tobias, on the other hand, seemed a little disgruntled, but otherwise unafraid. There'd been a hint of fear in her eyes as Sam met her gaze in the Gate room, but that could easily be attributed to her desire to keep her position on SG-1.

They were still waiting for her out in the briefing room, their questions clear in their eyes, and the answers they were going to get out of her chained up within her. She wasn't home free yet. Not yet.

Maybe not ever.

"Sir, Thor moved too soon. I was expecting at least a few more days to trace how they were getting their information."

"So, other than Lieutenant Tobias, you have no idea who in the SGC might be working for Colonel Maybourne?"

"No, sir."

Hammond let loose a big sigh as he placed his hands flat on the table. "This is getting messy," he muttered . At the start of Sam's protest he held up one hand, "I'm not blaming you, Major," Hammond said, "You were interrupted before you could get any useful information. But this leaves us in a very difficult position. We still have an unknown number of persons in the SGC who are not fully trustworthy in these matters. If they can sell their services or the information that passes through their hands to the NID, what is to stop them from selling it to some other organisation?"

"Sir..." Sam hesitated before she offered this. She didn't want to, but it might be the closest thing to a solution they'd get. "If there are personnel in the SGC who were involved with Colonel Maybourne, they'll probably be resentful or angry that the group was found out."

Hammond fixed her with a firm gaze, seeing ahead to what she was offering. "You're willing to act as bait?"

"If it gets the job done."

"And what about the personal danger?"

"I can handle it," Sam said with more confidence than she felt. "Sir, we can't afford to let this happen a second time." The next time, their opponents would be more prepared. There'd be more precautions taken, and if the SGC was required to bring it down or lose their alliances...

Next time, the SGC wouldn't be quite so lucky.

Hammond folded his hands on the desk and regarded her with regret. "Major, the fact that we can't afford for this to happen a second time is the only reason that I'd permit you to continue this assignment." He glanced out the window at the trio of men who hovered in the briefing room. "I'll leave the SG-team assignments as they stand for the moment. Lieutenant Tobias will remain on SG-1, but we'll keep her under surveillance."

Sam nodded. That made tactical sense. If they believed Tobias had escaped detection, they'd be more likely to assume that other cells of their network were still free to move around. And she might make contact with people within the SGC, leading them to other possibilities.

The general continued. "You'll be on roster to whichever outgoing team requires your services as well as your usual duties in the labs. And I'm going to initiate a surveillance on your person at the base, and at your house, Major. For your safety."

His look indicated that he fully expected her to protest, and Sam did.

"Sir..." Her skin crawled at the thought of being under such scrutiny day and night - even if only for her own safety.

"If you don't accept the surveillance, I'm not going to authorise this." It was like a game of cards, and Hammond was playing tough. Bluffing? Possibly. But, as she looked into the face of a man who'd been both a family friend and a commanding officer, Sam suspected that he was absolutely serious.

The general took care of his people. He made decisions based on both practical necessity and consideration for those under his command. Sam trusted that. She was called on to trust that every day.

She acceded to the surveillance.

"What you've done so far is beyond what our allies required, Major. You don't have to do this." Hammond gave her one last chance at opting out.

"I'll do it," she said quietly.

Complete the job. Finish the kill. And don't leave an enemy behind you.

It was a mentality that Sam had heard of, but had never yet been required to embrace.

Things changed. People changed.

Major Samantha Carter had changed.

She wasn't sure she liked it.

----

"Major..."

Sam looked up at the blonde Lieutenant, standing hesitantly off to one side in the women's locker room. Her mouth stretched in an attempt at a smile. As attempts went, Sam suspected it was fairly lame, but she had nothing else to offer the traitor right now.

"Lieutenant." She did manage to keep her voice neutral at least. "I hear you've been doing well on SG-1."

"Yes, ma'am. Um... That's what I wanted to speak with you about..."

Judging by the uncomfortable glances the young woman was giving her, Sam guessed that she was now sure that she'd be kicked to the curb. Knocked back to another SG team with a 'Thank you, don't let the door hit you on the ass on your way out.'

"Don't worry, Tobias, your assignment's safe," Sam said, scooping up her borrowed fatigues in her arms. She ignored the ignominy of it all. She was one of the old timers, used to having not only her own locker, but her choice of lockers. But she didn't have that anymore. Heck, she didn't even have her own toiletries at the moment. She'd 'borrowed' the shampoo she'd just used from Daniel's locker, easily remembering the combination for his lock.

"Ma'am?"

Sam hugged her dirty clothes to her chest, not caring if she wrinkled her fatigues. "I've discovered that I'm tired of following. This little...situation has showed me that it's time for me to crawl out from under Colonel O'Neill's shadow. SG-1's all yours. I'm not going back."

It pained her to say the words, to give her fear voice, but she had no choice. That much had come to her while she'd stood under the steaming spray of the shower. She was bait. Chum tossed into the water, hoping to attract the sharks, lots of pretty, conniving, lying, stealing sharks.

And sharks tended to go into a frenzy when there was blood in the water. She couldn't run the risk that her friends would get caught in the crossfire. Not to mention the fact that nothing was going to scare off any potential attackers faster than an ex-special forces colonel, an ex-first prime and one pissy archaeologist.

"I don't understand, Major."

"What don't you understand?" Sam asked, deliberately pitching her voice to be as condescending as possible. "SG-1's all yours, I'm through with it. Have fun." Sam turned dramatically on her heel, pausing at the door. "One thing though."

"Major?"

"O'Neill will flirt with a house plant. If you're smart, you'll play along, feed his ego. But don't take it seriously. Unless, of course, you like to feel stupid when he uses you and your feelings." Sam dropped her soiled clothes into a hamper and stepped out into the hall, sighing deeply as the door closed. Intermission was over, now it was time for the second act.

----

Sam stood in her living room, tapping her foot against her carpet as she watched Colonel Makepeace pace the length of the room, studiously checking the windows and doors. He was professional, thorough, and unless her intuition was totally failing her, didn't want to be here in so many ways. He and Major Vadim had been assigned to be her bodyguards. General Hammond had chosen to assign Marines to be her protective service, since, so far, all the traitors they'd exposed had been Air Force officers.

The colonel didn't want to be here, that much was obvious. Which was one thing they had in common.

She didn't want him here either.

She never cared for Colonel Makepeace much. Oh, she didn't have anything personal against him. He and his Marines had certainly bailed, not only SG-1, but other members of the SGC out when it had counted, often taking casualties in the process. She didn't doubt his abilities; she did doubt his morals though.

"You already checked that window," she said as the colonel pulled back the curtain of her front window, fingering the lock.

"Just following orders," he said, turning back to face her. He wasn't in uniform, which wasn't unusual given that he was supposed to be undercover. She could see the bulge of a pistol under the arm of his leather jacket and figured that he was at least taking his orders seriously.

"I doubt your orders included checking out my house," she said, a small part of her enjoying baiting the man. True, she was no longer resigned, and, technically, he outranked her, but she also knew that her position in the mission granted her a little leeway. And she was in the mood to take it.

"Major, you have no idea what my orders include," he said, walking towards her. He pulled a radio out of his pocket and tossed it to her. "We're on the other end. Frequency twelve."

Sam caught it, recognizing a normal comms unit from the SGC's stores. "Not exactly secure," she said. "There's a storeroom on Level 25 that has a couple hundred others just like it."

"You know the radius on these. Anyway, it's not like we're going to be exchanging recipes. That's your 'oh crap' handset," he said. "Vadim and I will be outside. We'll keep our distance, but stay close enough to get here in a minute or so."

"Nice." She slid the radio onto her waist, using a clip to attach it to her pocket. She looked around the room, now seeming more like a prison than a refuge. Staying home hadn't been her idea. General Hammond had suggested that the best way to catch a thief was to lay some bait. And the general believed for their story to be truly believable, Sam needed to lay low for a couple of days.

From what she'd heard, there had been a few more arrests, no one major, no pun intended. A few lieutenants, a couple of sergeants... Low level people that were nothing more than couriers. Which was good in one way, it meant none of them had ratted out Tobias, however it also meant that most of the arrests were dead ends since few of these couriers knew the names of any of the leaders of the rogues.

Those leaders were the elusive fish Sam and Hammond were trying to catch. And Sam knew that they weren't going to go down easy.

Makepeace stepped towards her front door, then turned back to face her. "You know, Major. This little stunt hasn't exactly made you a lot of friends," he said, casually.

"I've never been in this to make friends," she shrugged, plopping down on the couch.

"Well, you haven't. No one likes a rat."

"No one likes a thief either," she parried.

"One person's thief is another person's saviour."

"Colonel, you've been out there. You know how outgunned we are. The Goa'uld are coming. It's just a matter of time. Our hope doesn't lie in what we can steal, but who we know."

"Major-"

"Colonel. We need our allies. This was the only way to keep them. And if that gets me a few less cards at Christmas, then so be it," she said defiantly, as much to convince him as to convince herself.

Makepeace stared at her for a few seconds before sighing. "Whatever," he dismissed. "It's Vadim and I until 0100, then Markham and Miller. We're not going to let you know when we change, or even where we are. But we will be out there," he promised. "You just keep your ass in here until 0800."

He walked out the front door, closing it behind him. Sam got off the sofa and made her way to the door, locking the deadbolt. She returned to her living room, her hand going to the small of her back, removing her pistol from its hiding place, laying it on the cushion beside her. Even though General Hammond had assured her that her house had been swept and cleared of all the bugs, she still felt uncomfortable. Sort of like sitting in a picture window, on display for all to see.

Maybe, when this was all over, she'd see about selling the house. Find herself somewhere new, fresh and clean. Somewhere that could be a real refuge.

A car drove down the street and she watched it drive by, sighing softly when it passed without slowing. Makepeace and Vadim might be out there, but she was in here. As were the only other people she could trust at the moment.

----

Daniel followed Teal'c into the commissary, the odour of eggs and bacon teasing his nostrils. Breakfast on a military base, guaranteed to clog your arteries in two-point-five seconds flat. It always struck him as odd, for a group of people that emphasized physical fitness and endurance, there was still a marked preference for foods that would give a fitness trainer a heart attack just by looking at them.

The commissary was moderately busy at this time of the morning and there were a half dozen empty tables. Daniel grabbed a single serving bowl of cereal and a carton of milk, topping it off with a mug of black coffee.

Teal'c was going for something more substantial, his tray burdened with large servings of fruit and bread. Daniel saw Sam sitting alone at a table and he stared for a second, before deliberately heading in another direction.

"Daniel Jackson?" Teal'c asked. "Should we not join Major Carter?"

"SG-1 has breakfast together," Daniel answered, accenting the name.

"Major Carter is still a member of SG-1," Teal'c replied, taking a step towards Sam.

"Teal'c...."

"I am joining Major Carter," Teal'c said. "It would be best if you did so as well."

Teal'c walked away from Daniel and he stood there for a few seconds, debating what to do next. He wanted to join Sam, wanted to talk to his friend. But another part of him wanted to just turn on his heel and leave the room.

Despite having a meeting with General Hammond and being briefed on Sam's mission, her betrayal still stung. She could have said something, should have said something. She'd treated him and Teal'c like everyone else, like they were suspects in the theft.

A couple of the nurses at a nearby table giggled, whispering behind their hands while glancing at him purposefully. Knowing what their topic likely was, Daniel changed his course, joining Sam and Teal'c. He may be pissed at her, but he wasn't going to go down as the asshole in this situation. "Morning."

"Hi," Sam said, smiling up at him. He sat down, opening the carton of milk and pouring it over his cereal.

"Did you enjoy your days off?" He knew she'd been sent home soon after her return from the rogue base. According to Jack, that was standard. Daniel didn't know what bothered him more, the fact that they had a standard procedure for screwing your friends, or that Jack knew about it.

"Eh," she shrugged. "I would rather have been here getting caught up on things."

"I'd think you'd have plenty of time go get caught up," he said, bitterness creeping into his voice. Jack had shared something else with Daniel when they'd talked yesterday, something Daniel hadn't wanted to believe.

"What do you mean, Daniel?"

"Why is Tobias staying on SG-1?" he asked, tossing the question down as a gauntlet.

"She just is," Sam answered, coolly taking a sip of her coffee.

"I am puzzled by your reaction, Major Carter," Teal'c said.

"What do you mean, Teal'c?"

"I believed that you enjoyed your tenure with SG-1."

She smiled. "I did. Teal'c, it isn't just that. First of all, I've got something very important to do."

"What's more important than SG-1?" Daniel asked, rather disturbed to hear Sam dismissing all their years together like it was nothing important.

"One of the things that we recovered from the rogue base was a database," she said, taking on the tone she usually did in a briefing. "We think that Maybourne tried to hedge his bets."

"Of what do you speak, Major Carter?"

"Maybourne's not an idiot. He had to know that, eventually, things would go south. What we think this database is, is a list of everyone involved in the conspiracy, from the lowest courier to the leader," she explained.

"Blackmail?" Daniel asked.

"Probably," Sam confirmed.

"Well, that'll make it easy. Just give the list to the Justice Department and it'll be over."

"It's not that easy, Daniel," Sam said. "The database that we found is on a piece of alien technology."

"And it is not compatible with Earth technology," Teal'c said.

"Right," Sam smiled. "And, for some strange reason, none of the rogues want to help us decode it," she said ironically.

"This is where you come in," Daniel said.

Sam nodded. "That's my project. I decode this database, and we'll know every single person that Maybourne or his cronies have dealt with. We'll be able to shut down the entire operation all in one go."

"And you'd rather do this than come back to SG-1?" Daniel asked.

"Of course she would, Daniel," Jack's voice interrupted. He looked up, surprised when his friend didn't join them. "After all, it's jobs like this that look good on the record come promotion time," he said, staring pointedly at Sam.

"Jack?"

"Sir?"

"Save it, Carter," he said. "Daniel, Teal'c, Tobias is waiting in the briefing room. Which is where the two of you need to be in-" He looked at his watch. "Five minutes."

"Jack?"

"Daniel," he interrupted.

"You don't want to be late, Daniel," Sam said.

Daniel looked to Teal'c, gaining no insight from his friend's placid face. "Fine. Breakfast is overrated anyway," Daniel said, getting to his feet. Teal'c joined him and the two of them left the room.

"Colonel," Sam protested as she watched Daniel and Teal'c leave the room. "I know you're mad at me, but please don't-"

"That's enough, Major," he said, accentuating the title. "I tolerated your insubordination when you were on my team, I won't now."

She got to her feet, moving closer to him so that she could lower her voice. "Sir, with all due respect-"

"Save it," he interrupted. "I'm not your CO anymore. You don't need to feed my ego, and I'd appreciate if you'd leave the rest of my team alone as well," he growled. "Is that understood?"

"Yes, sir," she answered evenly, although his words settled coldly in the pit of her stomach. He stared hard at her for a second, then he, too, left the commissary. Aware of the sudden silence of the room, Sam looked around, noting the multitude of swiftly hidden stares and a general sudden fascination with the contents of their trays. They'd heard, all of them had heard.

Which had been the plan in the first place.

Daniel and Teal'c had unwittingly played right into her hands, giving her the opportunity to bait the line with their appearance and an attempt at conversation. She and General Hammond had wondered how to spread the word about their little 'discovery', the bait that they hoped would expose the last of the rogues.

Announcing the presence of the mysterious data source would have been fishy at best. The leaders of the rogues, while lacking in morals, weren't stupid. Sam knew, under normal circumstances, they would remain hidden for months, fully aware that they couldn't do much to 'save the planet' behind bars. However, they hoped that the impending threat of exposure would be enough to make them careless, and desperate.

A desperation that she could use to expose them once and for all.

If they didn't get her first, of course.

----

The reminder chimed on his laptop just as a form appeared in the doorway and General Hammond looked up, waving her in as he closed his e-mail and shut the lid on his laptop. "Shut the door, Major," he instructed, watching her follow his instructions before she took a seat in front of his desk.

"Sir."

"I understand breakfast was a little eventful this morning," he said. He'd received word of SG-1's little chat via the grapevine and a couple of well-meaning sergeants throughout the morning.

"Yes, sir," she said, grimacing. "I'm sorry, General. It just...happened."

"I suppose it's for the best. Word needed to get out eventually." He looked at her, years of familiarity giving him insight into her moods, no matter how hard she tried to disguise it. She was tense, taut as a bowstring.

"Daniel and Teal'c brought up the topic and, it just seemed natural to go with it. I figured it might be more credible if it was just an overheard conversation rather than planted information," she continued.

"And Colonel O'Neill," he prodded, agreeing with her assessment.

"I think the Colonel overheard something I said to Lieutenant Tobias," she explained, her tone regretful.

"When?"

"I ran into the Lieutenant in the locker room and she asked me if I would be coming back to SG-1."

"And?"

"And I said no."

"Major?"

"General, Tobias needs to be confident where she is and...sir, if I'm going to be bait, I can't have a colonel, a Jaffa, and Daniel playing bodyguard," she said. "SG-1 needs to be as far away from me as possible."

He looked at her again, wondering if she truly believed what she was saying, or if she even suspected the truth. He had a feeling that her desire to keep her friends away had less to do with making herself a better target and more to do with keeping her team-mates as far out of the line of fire as possible.

"If that's what you think is best," he agreed, not totally agreeing with her assessment but also not wanting to add more stress to her by trying to tell her what to do. Her life was on the line, and she deserved to call the shots.

He got to his feet and she followed suit as he opened the door to the hall. "Keep me apprised on your progress, Major," he said, pitching his voice so that it could be heard out into the hall.

"I will, sir," she answered, falling seamlessly into his plan. "The technology of the database is different from anything we've ever seen before, but I'm confident that I can decipher it in a couple of days. If everything works out well, I should be able to have you a list by the end of the week."

"Thank you. Dismissed." Hammond waited until she was down the hall a ways before calling his aide into his office. "Franklin, have Colonel O'Neill report to my office."

"Yes, sir."

George sat back down at his desk reactivating his laptop and pulling up the interrogation reports from some of the rogues already in custody. He was still reading a few minutes later when O'Neill knocked on his door.

"You wanted to see me, sir?"

"Jack, close the door and have a seat," he instructed. "I know you're not scheduled to go out until next week, however I have a mission for you."

----

Lieutenant Claire Tobias stepped off the elevator, a slight bounce in her step. This was going to be a good day. The rest of SG-1 had shipped out yesterday, on a mission that Colonel O'Neill said she didn't need to go on, citing some sort of alien 'they don't like strangers' excuse.

Which meant that Claire had, in effect, a day off. The colonel hadn't given her any assignments short of working to get up to speed on past information. Right now, she planned to have a nice, leisurely breakfast, read a few mission reports, maybe spend a little time in the gym and, if she could get away with it, go home early.

"I wouldn't want to be in Carter's shoes right now." A faint voice slipped around the corner of the corridor and Claire paused, stopping just short of being seen.

"Oh, I know. I mean, she might as well have a target painted on her back."

"Eh. She knew what she was doing. I think it serves her right for being a snitch."

"There's being a snitch and being a snitch. All I know for sure is that I don't want to go anywhere near her lab. Or wherever she's working on that database of hers. As soon as she deciphers the list of all the rogues, the shit is gonna hit the fan, and I don't want to be anywhere nearby when it happens."

The voices came closer and Claire, not wanting to be caught eavesdropping, quickly spun on her heel and ducked around another corner.

Database? Carter had a database? She had a list of the other rogues? Claire fought a sick feeling in her stomach. They'd find her now. She knew her name had to be on that list. As soon as Carter finished deciphering it, they'd find out about her, and Claire would join the others, taking a short, one-way trip to Leavenworth.

No. She'd heard rumours that they were talking about charging the rogues with treason. That meant the death penalty. They'd charge her with treason and sentence her to death.

Unless...there was a way. They didn't have any proof against her, not right now. As long as they didn't get any proof, she'd be safe. She had to stay safe, had to stay free.

----

Sam typed on her laptop, sincerely hoping that, to the people passing by in the hall, she looked busy. Or, at least, she looked like she was translating something. That was one part of their plan that she and General Hammond hadn't thought through. Pretending to translate was actually harder than really translating.

She was starting to get the feeling that their mission was going to fail. It had been five days since she'd returned from the rogue base, and three days since she'd announced the existence of the database in the commissary.

And since then...nothing.

There'd been no more arrests and things were finally starting to calm down. About the only development in the sting had been Claire Tobias' disappearance two days ago. Despite being under surveillance, the woman had vanished, going AWOL soon after reporting to duty.

In a way, Sam didn't blame her. She was facing imprisonment or death. Of course, she also had to have known that what she was doing was wrong. As unenviable as Tobias' position was, the woman had still gotten there by her own choices. And she was going to have to take responsibility for her actions.

Just like all the other rogues were...eventually.

She just had a funny feeling that it was going to be a long, long time before all of them were tracked down, if they ever were. The possibility that her mission might never be over hit Sam for the first time. Yes, she hadn't been thrilled at first. She hadn't liked lying to her friends, lying to everyone. More than once, she'd had the nightmare of something happening to General Hammond, leaving her literally hanging. As far as she knew, the General answered only to the President, and she didn't have much faith in the President vouching for her.

The decision to continue the subterfuge after her return hadn't been that difficult. She'd always had a completionist streak in her, the need to finish anything and everything she started. But now, when her mission stretched, not days, but possibly weeks or months out in front of her, she wanted nothing more than to march down to Hammond's office and tell him it was all over.

But she couldn't do that. Jacob Carter didn't raise a quitter.

The phone rang and she jumped, only then realizing just how deep in thought she'd been. "Carter," she mumbled into the mouthpiece of the receiver. There was no voice on the other end, but a bit of ambient noise told Sam that someone was there. "Hello?"

"Major," a woman's voice finally said. She sounded tentative, almost afraid.

"Who is this?"

"You know who I am," she said.

"I'm not in the mood for games," Sam said, suspecting a crank call. She wouldn't put it past some of the people on the base, especially since she certainly wasn't on anyone's top ten list at the moment.

"I know who you're looking for," the voice said cryptically.

"Who is this?" Sam repeated.

"You told me you were tired of following."

Sam sat up straighter, the woman's identity suddenly clear, as was the reason she wouldn't give her name. AWOL officers tended to be a bit cautious, and the mess Claire was involved in only gave her added reason to be cautious. "I'm listening."

"I have the list."

"What list?" Sam asked.

"The one you're trying to decipher. I...acquired the original," Claire said.

"Then bring it in."

Claire laughed. "And spend the rest of my life behind bars? I don't think so."

"Then why are you calling me?"

"I'll give you the list, in exchange for the Air Force forgetting that I exist," Claire bargained.

"I can't make that promise," Sam said.

"But you know who can."

Sam paused, running her fingers through her hair. She was telling Claire the truth, she didn't have any bargaining power. She was just a pawn, an instrument in this whole conspiracy. Of course, she was a pawn with access to a man who had a direct line to the keeper of the game.

"I can't promise you anything," Sam repeated. "Especially since I have no idea if your list is any good."

"I suppose you want a sample," Claire said.

"It would be easier to bargain if I knew what I was bargaining with," Sam said, knowing that she was going out on a limb, but really seeing no other way. Thus far, most of their names had come from rogues turning on each other.

"You know the Christmas place? At the base of Pikes Peak," Claire suggested.

"I do." Everyone knew about the shop. It was a tourist haven, selling Christmas themed items and ornaments year-round . Located at the base of the Pikes Peak highway, it did well snaring the curious as they began their nineteen mile drive to the summit of the mountain.

"Fourteen hundred. And come alone."

"I can't-"

"Alone or not at all," Claire interrupted. "I'll give you part of the list. If you find it valuable, we can come to an arrangement and I'll give you the rest."

"And in exchange?"

"In exchange, I go from AWOL to discharged. You and the Air Force forget that I exist."

"You'll need our protection if you testify," Sam warned.

Claire laughed. "Testify? Please. Are you that naïve? These cases will never come to trial."

"Then why turn over the names?"

"Because if they're locked up, there's no one left to come after me."

Sam sighed, unable to argue with her logic. "I'll be there. But no funny business. I don't like it, I'm gone, along with your last chance to avoid the stockade."

The line clicked and went dead and Sam hung up the phone, self-consciously looking over her shoulder. Did she dare hope that this would be it?

----

Claire checked her watch for the fifth time, tensing as a green sedan pulled into the lot. She relaxed marginally as a family got out of the car, obviously tourists.

Two more cars pulled off the highway and she studied them, recognizing one of the drivers as Major Carter. The woman pulled in beside her, giving Claire an appraising look as she waited for the second person to lock his car and go into the store. Carter turned off the ignition and got out of the car.

"Are you alone?" Claire asked.

"I said I would be," Carter responded. "Do you have the list?"

Claire nodded, pulling a CD out of her pocket. "You remember our bargain?" Claire held out the CD, then pulled it back, waiting for Carter's answer.

"You remember that I made no promises?" Carter retorted.

"What else is new," Claire muttered bitterly, again holding out the disc.

Carter took it, studying it as if she could decipher the laser drawn information with her bare eyes. "How do I contact you?"

"I'll call you," Claire said.

"We can protect you," Carter said.

"I've seen your protection," Claire said. "I'm not in the mood to hang in the brig."

"It doesn't have to be like that."

"Oh, please. Don't tell me you're that politically stupid."

"I'm not. The SGC-"

"The SGC is a viper's nest," Claire interrupted. "You have no idea how far this goes do you? How deep the corruption runs. Hell I would be surprised if the General-" A heavy force slammed into Claire's back, knocking her forward. She saw a look of surprise and shock flit across Carter's face as the woman reached out, awkwardly catching Claire. Both of them fell and Claire landed on top of Carter, broken glass raining down upon them.

Darkness swam at the edges of Claire's vision and she heard screams. The high--pitched noise accompanied by the slowing rhythm of her own heart.

Warmth flooded her chest, chased by an all--encompassing chill. Claire met Carter's gaze for one last time, taking no small measure of comfort from the terror she saw there before Claire closed her eyes and knew no more.

----

"Yes, sir. Yes, sir. I know, sir." General Hammond looked up, waving Colonel Makepeace into his office. He motioned for the man to sit then turned his attention back to the voice on the other end of the red phone. "Sir, we're still gathering information at the moment. I'm afraid that I have nothing more to tell you. Yes, sir. The very second I know something."

George gratefully hung up the phone and turned to Makepeace. "Colonel?"

"Tobias is dead. Fraiser's patching up Carter right now," he reported.

"And the shooter?"

Makepeace shook his head. "I'm sorry, sir. They got away."

George nodded, expecting the man's response. Despite Tobias' request, Carter hadn't gone to the meeting alone, she'd been accompanied by Colonel Makepeace, the Marine having been in a car half a mile up the highway. They'd hoped that the openness and public nature of the roadside store would be enough to give Carter ample protection, counting on this group's desire to be discrete. However, that judgement had been horribly wrong, the threat coming in the form of a speeding car and a high powered rifle.

"What's Major Carter's condition?"

"Nothing too serious. A sprained wrist, cuts and bruises," Makepeace said.

Hammond nodded, surprised that it wasn't worse. "The disc?"

"It was a bluff, sir," Makepeace said. "There's nothing worthwhile on it. Vadim thinks that the whole thing was a set-up."

"How so?"

"He thinks Tobias lured Carter out there and that the gunman screwed up and capped the wrong woman."

"And you?"

"I think Vadim's been watching too many episodes of the X-Files," Makepeace said, dryly.

"Well, whoever their target was, this has upped the stakes."

"I wouldn't argue with that, sir."

"If I had my druthers, I'd pull her out," George said.

"I don't think she'd like that, sir."

"I know she wouldn't like it. However, we hit the point of no return a long time ago. Colonel, I'd like you and your team to continue your protective surveillance."

"And if she wants to go home?"

George sighed. "Let her. If Tobias was right and we still have rogues at the SGC, I don't think she's any safer here."

"Yes, sir." Makepeace got to his feet.

"I'll inform the duty officer. If you feel the need for back up, he can put some SF's at your disposal."

"Thank you, sir. But I would rather stick with my own people."

"Whatever you prefer. Dismissed."

Makepeace came to attention and turned, leaving the room. George stared at the red phone, knowing that he needed to brief the President, but he just wasn't in the mood just yet.

He got to his feet and walked through the briefing room. Descending the stairs, he made his way over to Harriman. The President could wait. George had another call to make, one that was far more important.

----

It was the little things that irked. Or so said the Colonel.

She knew what he meant, although not in the way he'd meant it.

He'd been referring to the way he sometimes needled Daniel - teasing the younger man with a perfectly serious expression on his face.

She was thinking of other things, like being able to use both hands without wincing.

Sam turned off the water, awkwardly twisting the knobs with one hand. She reached for a towel, hissing between her teeth when she tried to use her left hand. "Damn it," she muttered, gently cradling the bruised flesh. "It's your own fault," she chastised herself, drying off with the towel. Janet had offered to help her take a shower back at the SGC, but Sam had refused. It'd been humiliating enough that Janet had helped her change from her blood soaked clothes. In hindsight, maybe she should have accepted the help.

Pragmatically acknowledging that it was far too late for regrets, or to ask for help -unless she really wanted to get to know Vadim better - Sam turned her attention to getting dressed.

Since buttons and snaps were beyond her at the moment, she settled for simple clothing, sweats and a t-shirt, with a sports bra being the most complicated item.

She unwrapped the plastic wrap she'd twisted around her arm to keep the bandage dry and pushed her fingers though her towel-dried hair. She thought about putting on make-up or doing her hair but dismissed the idea. If Vadim and Makepeace had reached this stage in their lives without seeing a woman with wet hair, they definitely needed to get out more often.

She left the bathroom and padded into the hall. It felt good to be home, especially after the massively crappy day she'd had.

She was still shaky. Every time she closed her eyes, she relived the afternoon. Again, she saw Tobias fall forward, felt the woman's weight on her arms. Her fingers were still sticky with Tobias' blood dripping over her, soaking into her clothing, she could still smell it, a metallic odour in her nostrils that not even steam and scented soap could dismiss.

Sam had panicked a bit, desperately pushing at the woman's weight, struggling to get it off her, not caring if it left her exposed, just knowing that she needed to get free.

Fortunately, it'd taken Colonel Makepeace less than a minute to reach her. Sam couldn't deny the relief she felt when she'd heard his deep voice barking orders. His presence had given her the luxury to simply deal with what had happened-and to figure out what she needed to tell the police.

"Major," Vadim acknowledged, looking up from the paper he was reading.

Sam nodded at him, making her way into the kitchen. She pulled a bottle of wine out of the fridge and splashed a small amount into a glass. She had no plans to get drunk, it was far too important that she remain aware. But she also knew that all one glass was going to do was relax her a bit, and she did need that.

"Where's the colonel?" she asked, joining Vadim in the living room, staking claim to the couch.

"Out walking the perimeter," Vadim said.

"I hope he doesn't shoot Mrs. Steven's dog," Sam muttered. There would be no living with her grumpy neighbour if anything happened to her beloved pooch.

"Major?"

"Nothing," Sam dismissed, taking a sip of the wine. "Shouldn't you be out there with him?" she asked.

Vadim shook his head. "We're staying inside."

"You're what?"

"Hammond's orders. We're to stay 'close'," he said, making small quote motions with his hands.

"How close?"

"You got a queen sized bed, right?" Sam glared and Vadim chuckled. "The couch will be fine."

"I'm aah, I'm not really set up for guests," she admitted.

He shrugged. "We only need one couch. We're gonna keep watch."

Sam nodded and took another sip, enjoying the warm feeling that was settling into the pit of her stomach. Vadim's words actually reassured her. She'd flirted with staying in the mountain and depending on the base's security but had dismissed the idea. The last time she'd hidden from an assassin at the SGC, she'd ended up mostly dead. And there was no Jolinar to bail her out this time.

The door opened and Vadim tensed, his hand dropping to his lap and coming up with a pistol. "It's me," a familiar voice said.

Sam turned, watching as Makepeace walked into the room. "Area's clear," he reported, frowning as his eyes settled on her glass of wine. "I hope you're not going to get drunk on us?"

"Just a few sips to steady my nerves," Sam said, setting the glass down. "I have a couple of beers in the fridge if you want."

"Thanks-"

"But no thanks," Makepeace interrupted, glaring at Vadim.

"Suit yourself, sir."

"You have any food around here, Carter?" the colonel asked.

"Not much I'd call edible. There's some delivery menus by the phone," Sam said.

"Vadim, get your nose out of that paper and order something to eat," he ordered.

Vadim folded up the newspaper and dropped it to the floor. He grabbed the menus and flipped through them. "Hey, Thai."

"No."

"Colonel..."

"No rabbit food," Makepeace said.

"Thai is not rabbit food," Vadim protested.

"It's close enough. Are there any pizza places in there?"

"Of course there's pizza places," Vadim said as Sam simply watched, keeping her mouth shut. They were almost worse than the Colonel and Daniel - and that was saying something.

"Pick one and order a supreme," he ordered.

"This is Carter's house. Shouldn't we ask her what she wants?" Vadim asked.

"Carter?"

"Pizza's fine," Sam said, not indulging the devilish part of her that wanted to order Thai just to annoy Makepeace. She owed him for this afternoon. And if that meant eating pizza, she'd eat pizza.

"You heard the lady," Makepeace said. "I gotta hit the head. Then I'm going to take another stroll around the block. Dinner should be here by then," he announced, making his way towards the guest bedroom.

Again alone with Vadim, Sam could only shrug. "I'm going to go lie down for a few minutes," she said. "If you want a soft drink, you may want to get some with the pizza. All I have is diet." She retreated back to her bedroom, taking no small amount of satisfaction in the look of good-natured indignation on Vadim's face.

As she flopped down on her bed and stared up at the ceiling, she smirked to herself. Colonel O'Neill was right, it was the little things.

----

"Major? Major!" An insistent voice pulled Sam from a restless sleep. She woke quickly, blinking against the flashlight shining in her eyes. "We gotta go."

"Vadim? What-?"

"No time," he interrupted. "Security's been breached. We have to go," he urged, pulling back her bedcovers.

For a moment, she was tempted to snatch them back and huddle beneath them. The urgency in his voice set her adrenaline running. "Where's the colonel?" she asked, fumbling for her shoes. Fortunately, after they'd eaten dinner she'd fallen asleep still dressed in her sweats. Something she attributed both to her situation and her reluctance to change into her pyjamas with two strange men in the house.

"The colonel's one of them," he said, helping her tie the laces of her running shoes.

"What?"

"I heard him talking on his cell phone. He's one of them."

"No. He can't-"

"Who the hell do you think shot at you today?" he asked.

"No. He-"

"He's one of them and he's going to kill you," Vadim said coldly. "Now do you want to move or do I get to toss you over my shoulder?" Sam paused, her eyes settling on the phone. General Hammond was just a call away. She reached for the receiver, stopping when he put his hand over hers. "Nest of vipers, remember? That's not a secure line. We gotta go before Makepeace makes it back."

Sam abandoned the phone, instead pulling her sidearm from under her pillow. "Ok," she said.

He led the way from the bedroom and she followed, stopping just long enough to grab her purse. He pulled her towards the back door and a car that was waiting in the alley. Silently, they got in, Vadim not turning on the headlights until they were a block away.

"Where are we going?" she asked, her heart still pounding in her chest. The adrenaline was starting to wear off and her hands were shaking.

"Somewhere safe," Vadim promised.

Reassured, Sam settled back in the seat. She stared out the window, every shadow now containing a hidden threat, a part of her wishing that the bad guys would just jump out in front of the car. Peaceful or violent, she just wanted this whole mess to be over.

----

Jack walked down the ramp, his fingers digging into the sleeve of his captive's shirt. Similarly burdened, Teal'c was behind him and Daniel brought up the rear, keeping an eye on all of them.

Both of their captives were restrained, heavy plastic cuffs binding their hands behind their backs. Fortunately, the rogues hadn't put up much of a fight, although Jack had an idea that it had more to do with the attitudes of the locals than any feelings of remorse on the rogue's behalf's. One of them, Kensington, was sick, suffering from a little Montezuma's revenge while the other one, Han had learned a cardinal rule of exploring - dating the Chief's daughter was a bad thing.

According to Jack's information, here was still one more rogue out there, but Jack had decided to play it safe, returning to the SGC with two captives than risk losing the two in pursuit of a third.

"Look what we caught, general," Jack said, spying the man through the control room window. Jack quickly did the math in his head, wondering what the hell was going on to get the old man in his office at 0700. "Teal'c's is a little scrawny but I think they're over the legal limit."

Hammond walked into the gate room just as the wormhole snapped shut. "Good job, SG-1." He motioned the SF's to step forward. "Secure them in the brig. Tell Doctor Fraiser that she'll need to examine them there."

"Yes, sir." Four SF's took the captives away and Hammond turned to Jack.

"Colonel, we need to talk."

Jack glanced at Daniel and Teal'c. "The last time I heard that tone of voice, I got divorced," Jack said.

"I don't think that's an option this time," Hammond said. He turned and started to leave the room.

"General?" Jack said, motioning at Daniel and Teal'c. "Is this a group thing?"

"May as well," Hammond said. "This concerns them too."

They followed the general up to his office, Jack and Daniel taking seats while Teal'c stood.

"Close the door," Hammond said, sitting down in his chair.

"Now I'm getting nervous," Jack said.

"Soon after you left on your mission, Lieutenant Tobias went AWOL," Hammond said, ignoring Jack's words.

"That's not surprising," Daniel said. "She had to have figured out that we know...what we know."

Hammond looked to Jack who shrugged. "They needed to know," he excused, nonplussed by the general's look of censure. One of the first things Jack had done when they got off--world had been to brief the rest of his team, telling them about Tobias being a traitor and that the woman had only been left free in the hopes that she'd lead them to the organizers of the conspiracy.

"That was your call, Colonel. And it's a moot point anyway."

"General?"

"Yesterday afternoon, Tobias called Major Carter and offered her a list of all the conspirators."

"Sam already has the list," Daniel said.

"Lemme guess, Tobias wanted a free ride," Jack said, his annoyance at the whole situation showing through. It irked him not only that a member of his team had been given such an assignment, but also that he'd been totally left out of the loop.

Unless, of course, that had been Carter's intention all along. Keep him out so he couldn't steal her thunder from an assignment that was nothing more than her ticket to another promotion and a way away from the SGC. He'd never pegged her as the power hungry type, but he'd been wrong before.

"Tobias is dead," Hammond said.

"What?" Daniel exclaimed.

"She arranged a meeting with Major Carter and was shot," Hammond reported.

"Is Sam okay?"

"Minor injuries only," Hammond answered Daniel. He met Jack's gaze. "Colonel, there is no list."

"Sir?"

"When Major Carter went on the original mission, her objective was to simply infiltrate and expose the rogue operation. To do that, she needed to create a distance between herself and anyone at the SGC." He looked at all three men. "While she was undercover, she learned that the rogues have an unknown number of accomplices here at the SGC, one of whom was Lieutenant Tobias."

"So she made up the list," Daniel said.

"Yes, Dr Jackson. Her hope was, that by making herself bait, she would draw out some of the accomplices."

"That was indeed a bold move."

"Bold?" Jack said, glancing back at Teal'c. "It's damn stupid."

"In hindsight, Colonel, I'm inclined to agree with you," Hammond said.

"Where's Sam now?" Daniel asked.

"She's at home."

"What? Does she have a death wish?" Jack exclaimed.

"Colonel Makepeace and his team are with her," Hammond reassured.

"My question still stands," Jack said peevishly, his tone openly challenging.

"Colonel."

"Are we permitted to assist in assuring Major Carter's safety?" Teal'c asked.

"That's why I attempted to recall you last night," Hammond said. "Colonel, I'd like you to assist with the interrogations of the prisoners you just brought back. One of them may know the identities of the leaders or the moles here at the SGC. Teal'c, Doctor Jackson, I would like you to go to Major Carter's residence and assist Colonel Makepeace. If you feel that it is in the best interest of her safety, I want you to bring her back here."

"And if she doesn't want to come?"

"Daniel?"

"Come on, Jack. She's as hard-headed as you are," he said.

"After three years, I don't think I need to advise you on how to deal with your team-mate," Hammond said.

"Toss her over your shoulder, Teal'c," Jack said.

"I have no desire to incur Major Carter's wrath," Teal'c said drolly.

Jack sighed. "Just go," he said, looking to the general for permission.

"Dismissed. But clear medical first." Daniel and Teal'c left the room while Jack remained stubbornly seated. "Colonel?"

"General, are there any other little details you'd like to let me in on? Has Carter, I don't know, run off and joined the Tok'ra or are the Tollan in the VIP room ready to upgrade our computers?" Jack let all his ire creep into his voice. He'd had three days to think, three days to work it out in his mind. Three days to realize just how much he'd been played. He hated being played. Especially when the players were two of a few people he trusted implicitly.

"I don't have to explain my actions to you," Hammond said, more than a little stiffly at the accusation that he might still be hiding information.

Jack was inclined to disagree - and he guessed that, ordinarily, Hammond would, too. "With all due respect, sir, when it concerns my team, you do."

"Jack, you were marooned on Edora when it all happened," Hammond said, his voice softening. "The Tollan, Asgard, Tok'ra, all threatened to pull their support unless we found the rogues and shut them down. Since you were unavailable, Major Carter was the only person they'd accept," he explained.

"I was back for a week before SG-1 went to Tollana. Did someone just forget to tell me?"

"Everyone knows how close you and your team are. It was imperative that your reactions be real. If anyone even suspected that the Major's situation was a set-up, she'd be dead," Hammond said bluntly. "Like it or not, Jack, your feelings matter less to me than her life."

Jack sighed, pushing his fingers through his hair. "And if we never root out all the spies? What then?" he asked. "Does Carter get to spend the rest of her life waiting for a bullet in her back?"

"That's why we can't quit," Hammond said. "If we don't cut all of this cancer out, it's just a matter of time before it grows back."

----

Daniel drove through the streets of Colorado Springs, cursing the morning rush hour traffic that slowed his journey.

"We will not be of much assistance to Major Carter if we become involved in a vehicular mishap," Teal'c said, his fingers digging into the dashboard of Daniel's jeep.

"I just-I want to get there," Daniel said, braking as the light turned red.

"As do I," Teal'c agreed.

They sat there in silence until the light changed. "We screwed up, didn't we?" Daniel asked. "We should have trusted her, no matter how hard she pushed."

"Major Carter is indeed adept at masking her true feelings," Teal'c said.

"Masking, Teal'c, not changing. We-I should have known that she wouldn't crack up. I should have known from the beginning that her whole stealing thing wasn't her being stressed out. Sam doesn't stress."

"You are incorrect, Daniel Jackson. Major Carter does stress," he corrected. "As I have said, she is most skilled at hiding her true feelings. Our duty as her friends was to trust her. It is a duty we failed."

"She pushed us away," Daniel said, turning off the main road and onto Sam's street.

"If you believed that your presence was endangering us, what would you do, Daniel Jackson?" Teal'c asked pointedly.

"You're saying she did it on purpose?" Daniel parked the car in front of Sam's house.

"I am."

"And it doesn't bother you?" he asked, turning off the car and pulling the key from the ignition.

"I did not say that. I found some of Major Carter's words to be most hurtful. However, I am aware that she did not say them out of spite, rather in a sincere desire to safeguard my well-being." Teal'c undid his seatbelt and opened the car door, unfolding his large frame.

Daniel got out and waited for Teal'c to shut the door before locking them. He glanced up and down the street, frowning at the lack of cars. "I thought Makepeace's team was here."

"That is what I understood."

"Well, not that I'm a pro at this or anything, but shouldn't there be something outside?"

"If they are concealed, then we would not be able to see them," Teal'c said.

Daniel shrugged, leading the way up the short path to Sam's front door. He stopped abruptly, reaching out his hand to Teal'c. Silently, he pointed out the newspaper lying by her front steps. Yes, it was early, but even if Sam was sleeping in Daniel didn't think that Makepeace would let a newspaper just lie there for hours.

Teal'c nodded and Daniel pulled his sidearm, suddenly grateful that Jack had insisted that he carry it. He dug into his pocket and pulled out Sam's spare key, handing it to Teal'c.

Teal'c stepped forward and unlocked the door, slowly easing it open. They slipped inside, a muffled groaning sound breaking the silence of the house. Daniel followed the noise into the kitchen, staring in shock at a bound and gagged Makepeace. Ignoring him for a moment, Daniel and Teal'c checked the rest of the house, then returned to the kitchen.

Teal'c took a knife from a drawer and used it to slice through the ropes restraining the Marine's hands. "Where's Sam?" Daniel demanded, pulling the gag from Makepeace's mouth.

"I don't know."

"Was your duty not to insure Major Carter's safety?" Teal'c asked.

"Does it look like I just let her go for a walk?" Makepeace growled, exploring the lump on the back of his head. "Someone hit me on the back of the head and I woke up hog-tied."

"Where's the rest of your team?" Daniel asked.

"Markham and Miller should have been here by now. Vadim must be with Carter."

"We need to call the general," Daniel said. "Maybe Vadim took Sam back to the mountain and we missed them."

"That is unlikely," Teal'c said. "Colonel Makepeace's injuries were likely sustained several hours ago."

Makepeace struggled to his feet. "Jackson, call Hammond, fill him in. Teal'c, you're with me."

"Colonel?"

"Presuming that Carter is with Vadim, I have two members of my team missing," he said. "I know them, they didn't sleep in."

Daniel got his cellphone out, and had hit the speed dial for the Cheyenne complex, when something occurred to him. He held the phone to his ear and waited for the operator, but regarded the colonel with narrow eyes. "Makepeace?"

"Jackson?"

"If Vadim took Sam somewhere to keep her safe, why didn't he let someone know?"

----

Sam slowly opened her eyes, blinking to clear her fuzzy vision. She stared across the expanse of rough, bare concrete, trying to remember precisely how she'd gotten there.

Oh God, Vadim. She sat up, just then discovering that her hands were bound in front of her, the rope wrapped painfully around her sprained wrist.

"Where are we going?" she asked, the sleep finally clearing from her brain. She tried to read the street signs as they drove quickly through the pre-dawn streets.

"A safe house," Vadim said tersely, glancing over at her.

"A safe house where?" she pushed.

"Wouldn't be very safe if everyone knew where it was."

"Who am I going to tell?"

He turned a corner sharply, the sudden movement throwing Sam against the car door. "Are you trying to kill us?" she complained, unable to ignore the uneasy feeling that was creeping up her spine.

"I thought I saw something," he said, navigating another turn at high speed.

Sam caught sight of a street sign. "We're going north."

"So?"

"I thought we were going back to the mountain?"

"It's not safe there."

"Why not?"

"We don't know who else Makepeace has working for him."

"We don't know if he has anyone working for him," she retorted, the desire to get back underground and within shouting distance of her-former-team almost overwhelming. Even if they hated her guts, she knew they would still keep her safe...even if it was for no other reason than it was a lot of paperwork if anything happened to her.

"It's not safe there," he repeated.

"I don't care," she said, listening to her gut. Teal'c. Teal'c would be good. She hadn't pissed him off too much, and he was loyal to people. To the Colonel, to Daniel, to her.

"Major?"

"I want to go back to the SGC," she said, growing more and more confident in her feelings.

"I can't do that," he said.

Sam reached for her sidearm, bringing it to bear as his hand flew out, striking her across the face. The car screeched to a halt and her seatbelt bit into her shoulder.

A hand covered hers, wrenching the pistol from her grasp. Her survival instincts kicked in and she fumbled for the catch on the seatbelt, stopping when she felt a sharp sting in her thigh.

"Bob was right. You are a pain in the ass," he said, pulling the needle from her leg.

"What did you do?" she asked, fighting the floating feeling brought on by the drug as it worked through her system.

"Don't blame me," he said, tucking her pistol away. "If you'd just minded your own business."

She stared, realization setting in. Her hand found the button for the seatbelt and she released it. Opening the car door, she stumbled out, falling to her hands and knees as the world shifted.

Behind her, she heard his door open and she struggled to her feet. "Help! Help!" she called out, only making it a few feet before she fell again.

Vadim stood over her, wavering and twisting like a reflection in a fun house mirror.

"You can keep yelling if you want to," he said, smiling politely. "It's not like anyone is going to hear you."


Sam shook her head, fighting the flashback. "Oh crap," she muttered, grimacing at the sour taste in her mouth.

She got to her feet, relieved to discover that he hadn't tied them. A wave of dizziness washed over her and she closed her eyes, waiting for it to pass. She didn't know where Vadim was, but she had to get the hell out of here.

Opening her eyes, she set to exploring her prison. It was a large room, perhaps fifty feet square. Three of the walls were plain, dingy, grey-colored dry wall, marked in places with scratches and scrapes. The fourth wall had a row of high, small paned windows, many of which were broken.

Dirt and debris was piled in a couple of the corners and in various places around the room. Sam could see random trash, places where the high ceiling had fallen in.

A musty, dusty odour permeated the room and Sam knew that it was likely that the building had been abandoned for years. There was a door along one wall and she made her way over to it, surprised when the knob turned freely.

Riding a wave of hope, she pulled, only to have her hope dashed when it didn't budge. She tried several times, giving up when she realized that it was hopeless.

She turned her attention to the windows. Even if they were too small for her to climb out of, maybe she could see something, someone to help her out.

As she got close, her feet crunched over some broken glass and she bent over, picking up a piece. She tried to twist her right hand back to reach the rope, but couldn't.

Abandoning that idea, she tried to look out the windows, quickly giving up when she realized that they were too high. Finding a place to sit, she sank down to the floor. She pulled her legs up, manoeuvring until she could get her two feet to touch. She carefully placed the shard of glass between her feet, using the shoes as a vise. She began to rake her wrists back and forth across the grass, letting the sharp surface slowly sever strand after strand of nylon rope.

As she worked to free her hands, her mind wandered and she cursed herself for her stupidity. Damnit, she'd trusted Vadim, trusted both him and Makepeace. She never should have come home, should have stayed at the SGC.

No. That didn't work. If she'd have stayed there, they might never have made their move.

She'd succeeded, her mission was a success. Now she just needed to stay alive long enough to get word of Vadim's duplicity back to the SGC.

The rope gave and she sighed, pulling her hands free. She shook her right hand, trying to restore the blood flow as she straightened her legs, releasing tight muscles.

Ok. Now she just needed to find a way out.

She got to her feet and returned to the window. Grasping an empty sill with her right hand, she pulled herself up, squinting into the sun. Her heart sank as she took in her surroundings. The view was limited, all she could see was another building across a narrow alley. The other building was in much the same shape as her current prison. An aura of disuse and abandonment hung in the air and she knew that she was alone.

"Not much of a view, is it?" Vadim's voice echoed off the empty walls and Sam quickly let go of the window-sill, turning to face him. "But I guess you're used to that."

He slowly walked towards her and Sam eased back, trying to keep out of his reach. Her eyes settled on a stick like item in his hand and her mouth went dry, recognizing the unmistakable outline of a Goa'uld pain stick.

Behind him, the open door beckoned. If she could just get him away from it- "You know, I've always thought that Marines were meticulous, but this isn't much of a safe house."

He chuckled. "Oh, I don't know. I think it's pretty safe."

"Why did you drug me?" She slowly sidled around him, trying to lure him away from the door.

"Why didn't you simply mind your own business?" he countered.

"You were breaking the law. Our allies were going to desert us-"

"Allies?" he snorted. "You mean aliens."

"I mean allies," she insisted as they continued their dance, him coming towards her, her trying to get past him.

"Allies who only help us if it's in their best interest."

"Which is exactly what we do," she said.

"Which is as it should be."

"Listen to yourself. You curse them for doing what you're advocating yourself. Look out!" She pointed off to his left.

The instant he turned his head, she ran, hoping that the distraction would be enough to buy her the few precious seconds she needed to get past him.

The door was only a few feet away when a heavy weight slammed into her back, throwing her to the floor. She fought as hard as she could against him, only stopping when he grabbed her injured wrist, twisting it until the pain was too much and she screamed. He climbed off her and stepped away.

With the door and freedom beckoning, she crawled forward, ignoring the pain that lanced up her arm, making her stomach churn and the world go grey at the edges.

Something grabbed her ankle and dragged her away from the door. Her fingers scraped uselessly against the bare concrete as she tried to stop him.

He dropped her leg and she rolled to her back, watching as he kicked the door shut. "I don't know what it is with you Air Force people," he said casually, making his way to where he'd dropped the pain stick, picking it up. He slowly walked towards her, tapping the end of the stick against one palm. Sam tried to crawl away from him.

"Where's the list?" She shook her head, refusing to speak. "That's all I want. Tell me where it is and I'll go."

Sam kept quiet, knowing that the second he discovered the truth, that there was no list, she was dead.

"I must admit, you've hidden it quite well. I've searched your house, quite thoroughly I may add, and found nothing. Well, not quite nothing. There is that shoebox in your closet. Rather interesting." He smirked at her, before the amusement dropped from his face like a stone off a cliff. "But I haven't found the list."

Sam scooted back, finally running into a wall. She got to her feet, figuring she should stand and face him now. He was close, only a few feet away.

"Tobias searched your office. She was quite knowledgeable about computers." He frowned. "It's a shame actually, what happened to her."

"The SGC is a viper's nest," Claire interrupted. "You have no idea how far this goes do you? How deep the corruption runs."

"You killed her," Sam said.

Vadim smirked. "Of course I killed her. Hammond was too close to abandoning the whole thing. I needed to keep his interest-and give him all the more reason to keep you all safe and sound."

"You bastard...."

"Oh please. I did her a favour. Her only other alternative was twenty years of hard labour. Where's the list?" he asked, his eyes going hard. Sam shook her head. "Where. Is. The. List?"

"You really think I'm going to tell you where it is?"

He stepped even closer. "It's just a matter of time. And I have plenty of that."

She smiled thinly. "Go to hell."

He shrugged. "If that's how you want it. You've actually done me a favour. I like it better this way."

The tip of the pain stick pressed into her abdomen. Liquid fire raced along her synapses and pain was all she knew.

----

Jack stood in the door of the observation room, sighing softly before walking in. "How is he?" he asked, joining Makepeace at the window.

Makepeace shrugged. "He's still alive," he said. "Any word on Carter?"

"No," Jack said, turning away from the gory scene below. Teal'c and Makepeace had found the two missing members of SG-3 in their car down the block. Markham was dead and Miller critically injured. They'd gotten the two of them back to the SGC, it was actually closer than the Academy or Colorado Springs Memorial Hospital and Doctor Warner was operating on Miller right now, trying to save the man's life.

"I didn't know Jack. Didn't even suspect."

"None of us did," Jack said, trying to keep his ire from his voice. He wanted to grab Makepeace, and yell, demanding to know how he could be so stupid. How his own second-in-command could betray him so thoroughly. But Jack couldn't do that.

He had yet to answer that question himself.

"We don't think Vadim took Carter too far away," Jack said, taking refuge in the job. Questions could wait. Right now, his main priority was to see if he could resolve this situation before any more people died. There'd be plenty of time for recriminations and Monday morning Quarterbacking-but time was something he didn't think Carter had.

"The list."

"Right," Jack agreed. The list was why he knew Vadim wouldn't take Carter too far away. Vadim had to be after the list, and he'd stay close until he got it, or knew that it was a fool's errand.

"Is it even real?" Makepeace asked, almost reading Jack's mind. Jack didn't answer him. "Christ," Makepeace muttered, intuiting the truth. "She did get the memo, didn't she?"

Jack frowned. "Memo?"

"The one that said we don't have a sarcophagus and that dead is a permanent state?"

Very funny. "I'm not sure," Jack said. "But I think I'm going to make her reread it. Daniel and Teal'c are going to go over Vadim's file, see what they can find."

"How can I help?" Makepeace offered.

"Did he ever mention anyone? Family? Friends?"

Makepeace shook his head. "No. He was quiet. A loner."

Jack nodded. "We've got a team staking out his place. We've put traces on his and Carter's credit cards and phones. Hopefully that will help."

Makepeace nodded, distracted by the activity down in the operating room. Jack turned, planning to leave the man in peace. "Jack?"

He turned back. "Yeah?"

"Let me know when you find him," he requested. He turned, cold blue eyes meeting Jack's. "I want to take that son of a bitch down."

----

His cell phone trilled and Vadim sighed, annoyed at the interruption. He delivered a petulant kick to his victim and stepped away. "Vadim," he answered, wiping the sweat off his brow.

"Progress report," the voice said. Vadim recognized the voice of his superior, a man who he'd never met face to face. Vadim turned, studying the figure on the floor. She was lying on her side, almost curled into a ball.

"We've been...talking for several hours now. Still no success," he said, loath to report his failure, yet not willing to gamble by lying to the man.

He heard a heavy sigh on the other end of the line. "I must have that list," he insisted, repeating what Vadim already knew.

"I know," Vadim said, letting his annoyance creep into his voice. "But if she won't talk-"

"Make her talk," his boss interrupted.

Vadim rolled his eyes. "What do you think I've been doing all day? Sharing recipes?" He knew his sarcasm wasn't wise, but the guy was an asshole. Even if he was Vadim's boss.

"Do not mock me," he said, and now the cold voice developed an angry edge to it.

"If you think you can do any better, feel free to come do it yourself," Vadim taunted.

"I want results. If you can't get me results, I will find someone who can," his boss threatened, terminating the call.

Vadim slid his phone back into his pocket and made his way back to Sam. She was just as he'd left her, semi-conscious on the floor. "Wake up," he ordered, slapping her face. Much to his dismay, she merely moaned, her eyes rolling up into the back of her head as she passed out. "Bitch," he cursed, getting to his feet.

He checked his watch. "Oh well, it's time for lunch anyway. Enjoy your nap, major. We'll continue this once I've gotten something to eat."

----

Teal'c looked up as O'Neill walked into the room. "O'Neill."

"T. Any luck?"

"No," he said as the human joined him, sitting on the other side of the desk. He pushed aside a couple of empty plates, remains of their lunches. "Daniel Jackson and I have spent several hours reading the contents of this file. We have uncovered nothing that suggests the current whereabouts of Major Carter."

"Vadim didn't have much of a life," Daniel Jackson said, handing O'Neill some papers. "The only phone calls we could find on his home phone were from his team mates. We're still waiting for the report from his cell phone."

"The team found nothing at his apartment. The most personal thing was his smiley faced underwear," O'Neill grimaced.

"I presume you have had no luck interrogating the two rogues we apprehended?" Teal'c asked.

O'Neill shook his head. "Nothing. They're low level grunts. It almost looks as though there was nobody high-up in this program..."

"I don't know what else to do, Jack," Daniel said. "Where could he take her?"

O'Neill sighed. "A few thousand places, presuming he wanted to stay within twenty or thirty miles. A few million if he goes elsewhere. Presuming he hasn't killed her yet."

"You really think they'll kill her?" Daniel asked.

"If they don't get what they want, yeah," O'Neill answered. "Daniel, this goes high, very, very high."

"The higher a person's position, the more ardently they will work to preserve it," Teal'c said.

"So, what? We just-hang out and wait?" Daniel asked, obviously frustrated at their inability to assist their team-mate. "See if Vadim drops Sam off on some street corner and she calls, asking for a ride?"

"You have any suggestions, I'm open," O'Neill said, his voice rising.

"We will be of little assistance to Major Carter if we continue to fight amongst ourselves," Teal'c said.

"Why'd she do it?" Daniel asked. "She had to know that it was dangerous."

"Of course she knew, Daniel," O'Neill said. "She may do stupid things, but she's not dumb." He scrubbed his hands over his face and sighed. Teal'c saw an expression of hopelessness cross his face. He knew that O'Neill was feeling Major Carter's absence most keenly, his normal feelings of responsibility augmented by feelings of guilt.

Not just guilt that she was missing and in danger, but guilt that she had been put into the position in the first place. No doubt, O'Neill believed that, had he not become marooned on Edora, he would have been the one chosen for the undercover mission. He would have been the one in danger, would have been the one isolated from his friends. Would have been the one missing now and Major Carter would be safe.

"I hate waiting," Daniel said after a minute.

"Yeah," O'Neill agreed. "T, you wanna-"

The phone rang and Daniel picked it up. "Daniel Jackson, here. What? Say that again." He fumbled for a pad of paper and a pen, scribbling down information. "Yeah, yeah, got it. Thanks." He hung up the phone with a triumphant look. "Vadim just used his cell phone. He was on there long enough to triangulate it. They got it down within a few hundred yards," he said excitedly.

O'Neill snagged the paper from his hand, reading it quickly. "Call Makepeace," he ordered.

----

Daniel followed Jack and Teal'c through the empty halls, with Makepeace bringing up the rear. They were in one of many deserted warehouses on the city's north side and the long abandoned nature of the warehouse lent a decidedly creepy air to their surroundings. This was the second of three warehouses they had to search and Daniel was frustrated. It shouldn't have been this difficult.

He wanted nothing more than to just yell out Sam's name instead of creeping around like a thief in the night. But they didn't dare do that. Not if Vadim was around. Daniel knew that there was a very good chance he'd kill Sam before letting her be rescued, who knew what Vadim had let slip while working Sam over.

Teal'c raised his hand, telling them to stop. He silently pointed to the floor. Daniel could see scuff marks in the dust, indicating that someone had been here recently. Makepeace nodded grimly, his jaw set and his hands gripping his rifle.

They kept moving forward and Daniel's senses jumped into hyper drive. This had to be it. It was the first signs of life they'd seen all afternoon. They reached a junction in the hall and Teal'c looked both ways, trying to determine which was better.

They could have called a team in to assist them, but Jack hadn't wanted to. He still wasn't sure who the rogues were and was unwilling to risk Vadim getting wind of what they were doing. Makepeace and Hammond were the only two that knew where they were and what they were doing.

Teal'c chose to go left and Daniel followed, glancing back behind them to insure that they weren't being followed. Teal'c stopped in front of a barred door and pointed it out to O'Neill. He nodded and stepped back, giving Teal'c room to lift the bar.

Daniel hung back, keeping an eye on their six as the door opened and Teal'c swept in. Jack and Daniel followed him and Daniel felt his heart sink at the sight of a still figure lying on the floor. "Clear," Jack said and Daniel hurried forward, holstering his weapon as he went.

"Sam?" He knelt at her side, reaching out to feel her pulse. "She's alive," he reported, taking a little comfort in his words. She looked horrible. Her face was pale and dirty, a bruise colouring one cheek. Her sprained wrist lay at an unnatural angle and he could see several scorched patches on her t-shirt.

"What the hell did he do to her?" Makepeace asked, coming to stand close while Teal'c slowly paced the room, searching it thoroughly.

"He used this," Jack said, holding up a Goa'uld pain stick.

"Bastard," Makepeace growled.

"We need to get Sam some help," Daniel said, monitoring his friend's pulse. It was weak and thready and he did not like the fact that she was still unconscious.

"I'll call Hammond, get us some-"

"I'd rather you didn't," a voice said. Daniel turned, instinctively moving to put more of his body between Sam and the door. "It gets so messy when you do that."

"Vadim," Makepeace growled, raising his weapon.

"Now, now, now. Don't do that," Vadim said, his own weapon drawn. "Someone might get hurt."

In the corner of his eye, Daniel could see movement and realized that Vadim hadn't seen Teal'c. Gunfire cut through the air and Daniel dove, sprawling himself over Sam. He vaguely heard two thunks as Jack and Makepeace both fell, struggling to get out of the line of fire.

As quickly as it started, it was over, silence rushing in. Breathing heavily, Daniel opened his eyes, not unhappy to see Vadim's body sprawled in the doorway, a small trickle of blood running between his sightless eyes. "That someone shall be you," Teal'c said coldly, lowering his weapon.

"T. We wanted to interrogate him," Jack said, pushing himself up from the floor with a groan.

Teal'c glared at Jack. "This hataka does not deserve to live," he said coldly.

"O'Neill, can't you control your people?"

Jack glared at Makepeace. Instead of answering, he pulled his cell phone out of his pocket. "Makepeace, you and Teal'c go see if Vadim had a car and secure it. I'm going to get a containment and medical team here." Makepeace and Teal'c moved to follow his orders. "T?" Teal'c turned back. "Good shot."

----

George Hammond walked into the infirmary, not surprised to find the three male members of SG-1 lurking just inside the door. "Colonel?"

Jack shook his head. "Nothing yet."

George sighed. It was what he'd expected, just not what he'd hoped for. "I heard from the containment team. They didn't find anything of value in the warehouse. Vadim had been using one other room as a sort of a place to stash things he'd stolen lifted, such as the pain stick. But, so far, they haven't found anything that would lead to his superiors," he reported.

"Par for the course," Jack said.

"So this was all for nothing?" Daniel said, sounding more than a little bitter.

"No, it wasn't, Doctor Jackson," Hammond said. "Major Carter successfully shut down the off-world rogues and exposed two traitors here at the SGC. Her assignment is far from a failure."

Doctor Fraiser walked into the room and the four men tensed. "She's going to be fine, gentlemen," she said, anticipating their question.

"Doctor?"

"Her sprained wrist is now broken, and she has several first and second degree burns from that...thing," she reported, her voice disgusted. "Cuts and bruises, maybe a couple of bruised ribs but I won't know for sure until she regains consciousness. A few weeks and she should be fine."

Jack sighed and Daniel noticeably slumped. "That is good news," Teal'c said.

Sergeant Harriman stuck his head around the corner. "Sir. This just came in." He handed Hammond a piece of paper.

"Thank you, sergeant."

Hammond read it, then looked speculatively at Jack. "Colonel, are you in the mood for a trip to Washington?" he asked.

"Not particularly," Jack said. "What's up?"

"Something I think you're going to love." He handed Jack the piece of paper. "The cell phone company finally gave us a report on Vadim's phone, including the last call he made."

"His contact?" Daniel asked.

"Apparently so," Hammond said.

"Is this for real?" Jack asked, handing the paper to Daniel.

"It looks that way, colonel," Hammond said.

Jack sighed, looking at Janet.

"O'Neill, I believe Major Carter would understand our absence, especially if it finished her assignment."

"So, we're really going to go do this?" Daniel asked.

"Not alone. I'll notify the FBI and you'll be accompanying them, as observers only," he warned. "I can have a plane at Peterson within the hour."

"One thing, General Hammond," Daniel asked. "Sam's gonna hate that she missed this. Can I take pictures?"

----

Janet checked her watch and stepped got up from her desk. She snagged her coffee cup and made her way out into the infirmary. She made her way over to Sam's bed and set down the cup, exchanging it for Sam's chart.

Her friend was still unconscious, sleeping off the strong sedative they'd used when they'd set her wrist. And, Janet suspected, sleeping off her experience from today. Janet felt sick at all Sam had been through. She'd glossed over some of the details for her team, although she knew that, eventually, General Hammond and Colonel O'Neill would receive a complete medical report with pictures and anatomical notation. Such things were standard for injuries received in the line of duty, and this sure as hell was in the line of duty.

She heard a sigh and looked down, surprised to see Sam sluggishly opening her eyes. "Hey," she said, moving to the head of the bed. Janet laid her hand along Sam's cheek. "How are you feeling?"

Sam frowned and tried to talk. "It's ok," Janet reassured her. "You're safe." Janet reached for a cup of water, placing the straw between Sam's dry lips. She sucked up a couple of sips then Janet took the straw away. "You can have more later," she promised. "How do you feel?"

"Hurts," Sam whispered weakly.

"I know." Janet brushed Sam's hair away from her face, hoping to soothe her. "It'll be better soon. You just go back to sleep. You'll feel better when you wake up." Sam closed her eyes and slipped back to sleep.

Janet stayed with her for a few more minutes, then picked up he coffee cup before leaving the room.

----

Robert Makepeace stood awkwardly in the door of the infirmary. It was barely comfortable for him to visit people he knew, such as Miller, recuperating in the intensive care wing, but it was even more uncomfortable when it was someone he barely knew, not to mention a female. It was made even worse by the fact that this particular female had ended up in the infirmary because of one of his own men.

One of the nurses passed by, giving him a strange look. Robert sighed and stepped into the room, realizing that his hesitation was going to raise more eyebrows than his visit.

Carter's bed was in the back of the room, cordoned off by thin curtains hanging from the ceiling. He rolled the magazines he brought into a tube and peeked around the curtain. Maybe she was asleep and-nope, no such luck.

"Colonel," she said, looking up from the book she was reading. Her voice was hoarse and rough, giving it an almost breathless, sexy quality. On any other day, Robert might find it appealing. If he didn't know that she'd likely screamed herself hoarse.

"Carter." He stepped forward. She looked better than he expected, nowhere near as pale as the last time he'd seen her. The white pyjamas she was wearing accentuated what little tan she had. Of course, it also did little to disguise the bruises and burns he could see on her arms and her throat.

Her left wrist was encased in a cast and rested on a pillow at her side. "You're looking better," he said, blurting out the first thing that popped into his brain.

"Considering Janet said I looked like a corpse a couple of days ago, I think that's a good thing," she said wryly.

"Aah, yeah. Here." He held out a couple of magazines he'd picked up, at O'Neill's behest.

The other colonel-and the rest of SG-1-were stuck in DC, first delayed by a miscommunication with the Justice Department, meaning that it took nearly twenty-four hours to get a judge to sign the warrant. Then they'd been delayed further by some heavy weather. The remnants of a hurricane were buffeting the east coast, delaying or cancelling even military flights.

Which was the main reason Robert was here. O'Neill had asked him to check on the major, make sure that she was okay.

"Thanks." She frowned a bit, then took the magazines from him.

"I didn't know what you read-I can get something else."

"These are fine," she said, setting them aside.

"So-when do you get out?" he asked, fumbling for a topic.

"Tomorrow, I think. Although I feel fine." She raised her voice slightly, and he got the idea that her comment wasn't directed at him.

"I think I saw Fraiser going to lunch," he said, sympathetic to her feelings. He didn't like it when he was stuck in the infirmary either.

"Oh." She slumped in the bed a bit.

"Do you want me to go get you something?" He made the offer, half-hoping she'd take him up on it.

"They should be bringing my lunch pretty soon," she said, her right hand fumbling with the bed sheets, her eyes darting around the room.

"I should probably-"

"I don't want to keep you if-"

"I'm sorry," he blurted out.

"Colonel?"

"I should have known that Vadim was dirty," he said.

"Sir, no one knew. He was very good at what he did. Hell, I even trusted him."

"That's no excuse," he said, ignoring her absolution.

"I'm sorry I didn't figure it out sooner," she said.

"Major?"

"If I would have figured it out sooner-"

"Stop," he interrupted. "Vadim fooled all of us. Let's just leave it at that."

"Colonel-"

"Do I have to make it an order?"

"No, sir," she said quietly.

An awkward silence stretched between them and Robert sighed. A nurse poked her head around the curtain and walked in, carrying a covered tray. "Lunch is here," she said needlessly. She set it down on the table.

"I should go..." Robert began.

"Do you need any help eating?" the nurse offered helpfully, earning her a cold glare from Carter.

"I'll manage, thanks."

"Yes, ma'am."

The nurse walked past Robert and he stepped aside to get out of her way. "You know, Major, it's too damn bad you joined the Air Force," he said, glancing at her. She froze, staring at him, her eyes wide. "You woulda made a hell of a Marine."

He enjoyed the way her jaw dropped, shock overcoming her features, before he smirked slightly, turned his back, and quickly left the room.

----

Sam flipped through the magazine, trying not to admit just how bored she was. Outside the curtains, she could hear the normal hustle and bustle of the infirmary.

"You are never picking the food again," a voice said as Sam heard a group come into the room.

"It wasn't that bad."

"Yes, it was."

"Three days and all he packed was beef stew and Swedish meatballs."

"I thought you liked those."

"I do. But not for every meal."

Sam smiled as the bickering continued, recognizing the sounds of a returning SG team.

Her smile faded as she realized it was something she'd likely never be a part of again. She found it just a bit telling that that, other than Janet and the nurses, Colonel Makepeace had been her only visitor.

Not even her former team-mates had come to see her. It shamed her to admit it, but she'd been too afraid to ask where they were. If they didn't want to come, fine. She wasn't going to ask for a pity visit. And she could definitely take the hint.

"Major?"

General Hammond's voice pulled Sam from her contemplations. "Sir." She instinctively straightened a bit in the bed, suddenly self-conscious about her attire, or lack thereof. She definitely wasn't used to talking to generals in her jammies.

He motioned for her to relax as he pulled up a chair. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine, sir. Thank you."

He nodded. "I just wanted to let you know that the President is very pleased with the results of the mission," he said.

"Really?"

"Yes. In fact, I've been authorized to tell you that any assignment you want-with the exception of his own job and a few seats on the Cabinet-is yours." There was a slight twinkle in his eye as she stared at him in surprise.

"Excuse me, sir?"

"The President said he'd give you a promotion, if you hadn't just received one," he said seriously.

"That's...that's very generous," she said, stunned.

"Yes, it is," he agreed. "I certainly don't want to lose you but-"

"I'm fine here, sir," she interrupted.

He smiled. "That's good to know. I'm sure Colonel O'Neill will be relieved."

"Actually, sir. I was thinking I might spend some more time in the labs," she said, getting the words out before she could change her mind.

"Major?"

"It's my understanding that Lieutenant Rumlow has been getting along rather well. It might be best all around if things just stayed the way they are," she said, trying to ignore just how hard the words were to say.

In her heart, she wanted nothing more than to go back to her team, hell, go back four months and pretend that Edora and the rogues never happened. But there was no going back, not now, not ever.

Oh, the general could probably talk the colonel into accepting her back, but she didn't want it that way. Out in the field, trust was a matter of life and death. And she would rather not go with them than endanger them with their mistrust of her.

"Are you sure about that, Major?" he asked seriously, frowning a bit as he got to his feet.

"I'm sure," she said. "Besides, it'd be weeks before I could go back onto active duty anyway." She motioned towards the wrist cast.

"If that's what you want, I will inform Colonel O'Neill. You did a hell of a job, Major."

"Yes, sir," she muttered as he left the room. She slumped back onto the pillows, the magazine forgotten.

Yeah, a hell of a job. A hell of a job losing her friends. A hell of a job betraying their trust. A hell of a job destroying three years of friendship. Yep, she was talented all right.

Who'd want this talent?

The klaxons blared, announcing an off-world activation and Sam settled back, picking up her magazine. No matter how she might regret what had happened, there was nothing she could do about it. What was done was done. Her bridges were burned ash and acrid smoke, burning in the wind, and there was no help for it.

It wouldn't be so bad working in the labs. She could finally have normal hours. No more weeklong trips or ceaseless physical examinations. She might even start developing a social life.

The noise level increased and Sam looked up, startled when Janet pulled the curtains aside. "What's going on?"

"SG-8 & 10 ran into some Jaffa. They've got injuries and they're bringing back some refugees," Janet said.

"And you need the bed," Sam intuited, pushing back the covers.

"I'm afraid so," Janet confirmed. "We can put you up in one of the VIP rooms-"

"Why don't I just go home?" Sam suggested.

"Sam-"

"Janet, you're going to release me in the morning. What's a few more hours?"

Janet sighed. "I still have prescriptions to write out. And I wanted one more x-ray of that wrist."

"Write them out and I'll fill them on the way home," Sam said. "And I can come back tomorrow for the x-ray," she bargained.

"Doctor!" one of the nurses cried.

Janet looked over her shoulder. "Ok," she said, pulling a pad of paper out of her pocket. She quickly scribbled out two prescriptions talking as she wrote. "One's an antibiotic, the other is an anti-inflammatory. You've taken them before. Call me if you don't feel good."

"I know," Sam said, taking the prescriptions from her.

"Use a driver," Janet instructed. Sam left the room, doing her best to stay out of the way of the orderlies who were hurrying into the room, bearing the wounded.

Once she was down the hall and out of the way, she slowed, realizing for the first time that she was still in her pyjamas. "Ok," she muttered. "Stop one, clothes."

----

Jack stepped off the elevator, trailed by Daniel and Teal'c. "I need to go check in with Hammond," he said, fighting the exhaustion that made his eyes burn. The past two days had been long and tiring with moments of eminently enjoyable satisfaction interspersed with hours of thumb twiddling boredom. He had a headache, his legs hurt from too many hours in a cramped airplane seat and he definitely needed a shower. As they all did. They'd left for a short little trip down Revenge Avenue and they hadn't packed for SG-1's seventy-two hours of 'you can't get there from here'.

Kinsey was in Federal custody, and Daniel had the pictures to prove it. Agent Spender and the Federal Prosecutor assigned to the case both felt that it was an open and shut case with more than enough evidence to lock the good senator up for a long, long time.

Jack held no such illusions. He figured that Kinsey would cry like a baby and work a deal, probably providing evidence in exchange for a reduction in his sentence. Still, Kinsey was out of their hair for a very long time.

"Should we not inquire into Major Carter's condition?" Teal'c asked.

Jack looked at his watch. "It's 2100," he said. "She should be asleep."

"Didn't Janet say she was going home tomorrow?" Daniel asked. They'd called in a couple of times, both to check on Sam's condition and to keep General Hammond up to date on their current situation.

"Yeah," Jack said. "I'll talk to Hammond first, then meet you down in the infirmary."

They reached the elevator and got in, punching the buttons for two different floors. Daniel and Teal'c got off first while Jack continued down to Level 27. Even though it was late, he knew that the general was in, having seen his car in the lot at the surface.

Jack walked through the briefing room, frowning when he saw support personnel down in the gate room, obviously cleaning up.

"Colonel, I see you made it back."

"General," Jack acknowledged. "What happened?"

"SG-8 & 10 came across some Jaffa. They retreated and brought some refugees with them. We just sent all the healthy refugees to the Alpha site, the wounded will follow as soon as they're able. Major Kovacek is going to leave in the morning and see if Tupelo will take them in."

"Looks like I missed all the fun," Jack said.

"Oh, I don't know. You certainly sounded like you were enjoying yourself," George said wryly.

"You oughta see Daniel's pictures. They're priceless."

"I'm sure they are," the general agreed. "I spoke to Major Carter today," he said after a few seconds.

"Oh?" Jack turned to look at the man. Hammond was standing beside him, staring out into the gate room.

"She expressed to me the desire to spend more time in the labs."

"Well, that's a no brainer," Jack said, earning him a sharp look from Hammond. "She can't go out into the field until that wrist of hers heals."

Hammond nodded. "She suggested Lieutenant Rumlow as a replacement."

"Least he's broken in," Jack said. "I can put up with him for a few weeks." Yeah, it'd be a pain to have the young lieutenant around. He and Daniel had far too much in common and they were both too smart for their own good. Just like Carter. The difference was, Carter had learned when to button it. Rumlow still needed to be reminded upon occasion.

"Major Carter has indicated that she wishes the change to be permanent," Hammond said slowly.

"What?" Jack asked, shocked by the general's words. "When did this happen?"

Hammond shrugged. "Like I said, we spoke earlier today."

"Yeah, well, this is the first I've heard of it," Jack complained. What the hell did she think she was doing? She knew how Chain of Command worked. She wanted to transfer, fine. She could tell him first. So that he'd have plenty of time to talk her out of it.

"You haven't been here much in the past few weeks," Hammond said.

Jack looked at the general, his ire rising at the perceived rebuke. Hammond turned his attention back out the window. "The President is rather happy with the outcome," he said. "He authorized me to offer the major any assignment she wanted. She chose to stay here," he said casually.

"It'd be a shame to lose her," Jack said, struggling to cover the feeling of a fist slamming in his gut. Leave? She couldn't leave.

"Yes, it would." They stood there for a few minutes. "I think it's time for me to go home," Hammond said. "And you too."

"Yes, sir," Jack replied to his pointed comment. Hammond went into his office, gathering up his briefcase then going downstairs to the control room, presumably to inform the duty officer that he was leaving.

Carter wanted off SG-1? That was something Jack never thought he'd see happen. Not after she fought so hard so many times to stay on the team.

He tried to figure out why she'd want to leave. Was she still playing the game? Trying to keep everyone away from her? No. Not with Kinsey busted. The danger should be over. Even if any of them were stupid enough to try for revenge, the fact that Carter was on the President's list of favoured people would definitely buy her some protection.

Maybe, maybe she had another reason for wanting to get out of field work. What if Vadim had-? No. Fraiser would have told them. What if Carter had lost her nerve? What if she broke? He could respect that. Respect her desire to be as safe as she could be.

If that was why she wanted to leave, he wouldn't stop her. But he was damn well going to find out why she wanted off the team.

The steps clanged and Jack looked, frowning when Daniel and Teal'c stepped up into the room. "I thought I was meeting you two in the infirmary?"

"The infirmary's full of wounded," Daniel said.

"And Major Carter is not there."

"What?"

"One of the nurses said that Janet released her." Daniel said.

"How long ago?"

"Couple of hours. Just before all hell broke loose."

"Okay. You guys done here?"

"I am," Daniel said while Teal'c merely raised his eyebrow. "You think we need to go over there?"

"I do," Jack said, refusing to think that he was overreacting. Something told him that, despite the late hour, they needed to check on Carter.

"I can take Teal'c and meet you there," Daniel offered.

"Sounds good," Jack agreed.

When Jack drove up beside Carter's house, though, the place looked deserted. No car outside, no lights inside, no sign that she'd been home in a couple of days.

He surreptitiously checked the mailbox as he went past the gate, but it was empty. Maybe her neighbours had been collecting her mail?

On the porch, he paused, contemplating the wisdom of what he was about to do. On one hand, her car wasn't outside, which suggested that she wasn't home. He didn't recall seeing it parked out in the mountain complex parking lot, either. However, there was always the possibility that she'd gotten one of the airmen to drive her home.

He knocked on the door. Then he knocked harder. Nothing.

Jack debated the wisdom of letting himself in. If Carter was home, she wouldn't appreciate him barging in, on the other hand, if she wasn't, then he might gain some kind of idea as to where she was.

A momentary fear stole through him. Had they really gotten all the rogues? What if there were sleeper agents among them? It was entirely possible that there might be sympathisers who would fall into place upon the discovery of the rest of the network...

Don't get so paranoid, Jack, he told himself as he pulled out his keys. You got Kinsey, he'll sing like a bird, and she won't have to live on the run for the rest of her life. It was the work of a moment to let himself in; each member of SG-1 had the house keys of the others. They were definitely 'latchkey kids.'

Inside, the house was neat, dark, and deserted. The only sign that she'd been here was the opened mail on the table.

So she'd come home at least.

There was a key in the door, and Jack turned, but it was only Daniel and Teal'c.

"She came home," he said, lifting up a torn envelope. "Don't know where she is now."

He was starting to worry - with good reason, or so he thought. The last few weeks had been surprise after surprise after surprise. Carter had more layers than he'd ever thought possible, too accustomed to seeing her as the smart, problem-solving 2IC, rather than the independent officer she'd lately shown herself to be.

Daniel moved further into the house, but Teal'c turned back towards the street. At Jack's query, the tall Jaffa murmured, "There is a car approaching."

They piled out onto the porch and saw Sam's car pulling up. Jack went down to the gate and out to the car. He was soon at her door, pulling it open." His concern was, at one level, irrational. She was here, she was fine, she'd done her job and was coming home. However, he could not stop the demand from tumbling out past his lips. "Where the hell were you?" She stared blankly up at him. "Carter? Are you okay?"

It looked as though she'd just woken up, because it took her a moment to answer.

"I needed groceries," she muttered, undoing the seat belt and getting out of the car. "What are you doing here?" she asked, noticing Daniel and Teal'c as they joined them.

"Oh, I don't know. Someone gets out of the hospital, it's sort of traditional to visit," Jack said, stepping back as she slammed the car door shut, making her way around to the passenger side of the car.

Daniel got there first, opening the door and grabbing the small bag of groceries. She glared at him and reached to take them, stumbling a bit when the movement put her a little off balance. Teal'c's hand grabbed her arm, keeping her from falling.

"Is that it?" Jack asked, staring at the one bag Daniel held up.

"What?" she asked, shaking off Teal'c's hand and giving him a decidedly insubordinate glare.

"The groceries."

Her expression darkened." I wasn't exactly expecting company," she said, and turned on her heel to stalk up the path to the door.

"We're not 'company,' Carter," Jack pointed out, following her up the path and into the house.

There was a moment when it looked as though she'd been about to slam the door in their faces, groceries or no groceries. Then the rebellion drained away, leaving her looking wan and tired. Jack indicated the living room. "Go sit down before you fall down," he instructed her, gently.

Her 'sitting down' nearly was a fall down. She just collapsed into the chair, elbows on knees, head in hands as the guys exchanged nervous looks at each other.

Finally, she lifted her face from her hands and regarded the men littering her dining room. Her eyes lingered on him. "Look, I don't know what you guys are doing here, but I'm tired and--"

Oh, this was going to get them nowhere. "Daniel," Jack interrupted, without breaking gaze, "Show her the photos."

"The what?" There were days when Jack was amazed Daniel had reached adulthood without being murdered by someone for sheer frustrating absent-mindedness. "Oh, right." He began digging, and, after a few moments...

"Daniel?"

"I think I left them back in the locker room," he said sheepishly.

"You can't just leave those lying around," Jack chastised.

"They're not lying around, they're in my locker," Daniel corrected. "Anyway, it doesn't matter." He turned to face Sam. "It's over. You can stop this 'make us hate you' act, because it's not going to work."

"Daniel-" Carter was rapidly losing her patience with them. In a minute, she'd throw them out. Or something.

Jack figured he'd have to get his oar in now rather than later. Once she threw them out there were no guarantees she'd let them back in - and Carter was one tough nut to crack when she closed up. "Carter, you did what you had to do to get the job done." He tried to speak with the authority of someone who'd been there and done that and knew what it did to the soul. He hoped he was getting through, because Carter looked about as receptive as stone right now. "I'm not sure about Daniel, but Teal'c and I have both been in the same spot. It's never easy."

He didn't know how she'd take it.

He certainly wasn't expecting her to look from him to Daniel to Teal'c, then get slowly to her feet and walk out of the room.

A few moments later, they heard her bedroom door shut firmly behind her.

Daniel frowned and looked at Jack. "That wasn't quite the response I was expecting."

Jack rested his hands on the dining table, amidst torn envelopes and scattered bills. He was tired and, judging by Carter's response to his words, so was she.

"Perhaps this conversation is best left until morning," Teal'c suggested.

"Guess so."

"Do you think one of us should stay?" Daniel asked.

"I shall," Teal'c volunteered, interrupting Jack as he opened his mouth to speak. He regarded Jack in the implacable kind of manner that said, as effectively as words, that he would be more than willing to beat Jack over the head with a stick to remain behind. "I am the most logical choice as I do not require rest. And it eliminates the need for Daniel Jackson to drive me back to the SGC."

"Fine," Jack said, ceding to the inevitable. "I'll come back in the morning. Daniel?"

"Yeah, me too. Maybe I'll stop and bring breakfast," he offered.

"I'll hit the store."

"Jack?"

"I doubt Carter will feel like going out for a bit. I'll grab a few days worth of groceries."

"Ok. Just don't forget, it's Diet Coke," Daniel instructed.

"What? Right," Jack said, remembering Carter's preferences. "Meet you back here at 0800?"

"Deal."

----

Teal'c had been meditating by the light of one of Major Carter's scented candles for several hours when it sputtered into darkness. The peace of his friend's house was far more soothing to the mind and body than his quarters on the base, and he was fully rested and very much aware when he heard the sound of a door opening.

Major Carter slowly made her way into the kitchen, dressed in pyjamas and a warm robe. Judging by the rumpled state of her hair, she had just woken from sleep. As he watched, she removed a pan from the cabinet and he presumed that she was heating a can of the soup she had earlier purchased.

Content to allow her her privacy, he remained where he was and prepared to return to his meditation. Then he heard a loud thunk and a soft curse and rose to his feet. He stepped into the kitchen and saw her struggling to manoeuvre the top off the can using only one hand. "Do you desire assistance?" he asked.

She screamed, spinning and dropping the can to the floor where it barely missed landing on her bare feet. Her eyes were wide and terrified for that one brief moment, and Teal'c silently cursed himself for not having taken into account her nervous state of mind. "What the hell are you doing here?" she demanded.

"I wished to ascertain that you were well," he said, unaffected by her anger. He knew that she was not truly angry, but that it was a normal human reaction to fright. He bent over and picked up the can, using the can opener to remove the lid.

He poured soup into the pan and set it on the oven, turning on the heat. Samantha Carter moved away and watched him do so, and when he was certain the soup was on the way to preparation, he turned to face her. "Is there something you require?"

She'd sat down on one of the stools, and her hands were still shaking. "Why didn't you say something earlier?" Her voice was slightly breathless and Teal'c regretted his unwise silence all the more.

"I believed that you were asleep," he said.

She ran her fingers through her tousled hair. "I thought I was alone," she said, trying to explain her startled state.

"I believe that is a misconception you have had for quite some time," he said, sitting beside her.

The hand in her hair stopped scratching. She frowned at him. "What are you talking about?"

"You felt the need to separate yourself from us to more effectively accomplish your mission," Teal'c said, voicing his own perceptions for the first time.

As with O'Neill and Daniel Jackson, he had borne the effects of Major Carter's machinations and the distance that she had seen as necessary to carrying out her task. However he had not allowed her actions to become as personal as his team-mates had.

Of course, he also had never sought out personal communications, so Teal'c knew that he had never faced the focus of her efforts. This afforded him a more neutral place from which to open this discussion.

He heard the soup begin to boil and got up, efficiently pouring it into a bowl and serving it to her. He then filled the pan with water to soak and sat back down, noting that she had yet to begin her soup. "Major Carter, your actions have not cost you our friendship. Nor has it made you unwelcome among us."

The soup poured gently out of the spoon as she scooped it up, then dribbled it back into the bowl. She slowly shook her head. "I don't think so, Teal'c." He raised his eyebrows. "The Colonel places a lot of importance on trust. I don't think he trusts me much anymore."

"You are incorrect. I believe he trusts you now as much as he did before. I believe he has a new-found respect in your abilities."

Sam snorted. "What? My ability to get myself tricked and needing to be rescued?"

"No. Your ability to do the job required of you, regardless of the costs," he corrected. "O'Neill has always respected you. I believe that is why he was so affected by your actions."

"I couldn't say no, Teal'c. Not after the general asked me, not...We need our allies too much to risk losing them," she said.

"Of that I am aware. As are O'Neill and Daniel Jackson."

She sighed and picked up the spoon, idly stirring the soup. She ate a couple of bites, blowing on the soup to cool it. He watched as she ate, not saying a word as she emptied the bowl. "Do you wish to return to sleep?" he asked, picking up the bowl and rinsing it out.

"Did you get enough kel no reem?" she asked after a few seconds.

"I did."

"I don't suppose you're in the mood to see if there's a movie on?" she asked, slowly.

Accepting that this was as much as she would be willing to discuss the matter with him, Teal'c assented. She was open to their presence in her life after all that had occurred to her. Healing - and forgiveness - would come with time.

----

She was tired, but content.

Teal'c made excellent company for an all-nighter. Especially considering he was more than happy to sit and watch all three original Star Wars movies.

They were watching Luke's lightsaber fight in the throne room with Darth Vader - one of Sam's favourite parts of the movie - when the Colonel and Daniel turned up and let themselves in.

She was of a mind to chew them out for entering uninvited, but they had brought groceries - real food, not the canned stuff she'd bought last night. And...judging by Teal'c's attitude, she was going to have to work really hard to get rid of them.

"Morning, Sam, morning, Teal'c."

"Carter, Teal'c." The Colonel surveyed the room. "Did you have a slumber party or something?"

"Major Carter would not allow me to paint her nails, O'Neill."

In spite of her irritation, Sam couldn't completely stifle the laughter that came with Teal'c's deadpan comment. The Colonel's eyes bugged out, before he glanced at her, "Yeah, she won't let Daniel do that either."

"I don't let you paint my nails, Jack," Daniel commented from the kitchen. "So it's all fair. What're you guys watching?"

Sam hesitated before answering, "Return of the Jedi."

"Again?"

"It is still a good movie, O'Neill."

"You've seen 'em once, why do you need to see it again?"

"Oh, says the man who's watched 'Terminator 2' how many times?" Daniel demanded amidst the rustle of plastic bags.

"Thank you for ruining my mystique, Daniel," the Colonel grumped.

"Anytime, Jack."

Sam pulled a cushion onto her lap and sat down, feeling just a little exposed in her pyjamas and dressing gown. Sitting around with Teal'c watching a movie in her sleepwear was one thing, breakfast with a senior officer was quite another. "Is there any particular reason you're here this morning, Colonel?"

"Because it's 0800 hours?"

"And why are you here at my house at 0800 hours, sir?"

"To make breakfast of course." There was nobody in the world who could do 'stupid innocent' like the Colonel, with that slightly offended air, as if he couldn't believe she'd just asked such a simple question of him. "You just keep watching your movie and Daniel and I will sort everything out."

As Teal'c arched a brow at her, silently asking if she wished to resume watching the movie, Sam doubted that the Colonel and Daniel could sort everything out. Certainly not half of what she'd done in the last couple of weeks could be 'sorted out.'

Not what she'd said to them, not what she'd said about them, not what she'd done.

But there was no way she was going to get them out of her house, not without a scene, and she'd had enough scenes to last her a lifetime. Besides, she was hungry.

She nodded at Teal'c, and they sat back and watched the rest of the movie together, while the Colonel and Daniel made pancakes and coffee respectively.

By the time Luke piloted his shuttle out of the Death Star, she had a cup of brewed coffee in front of her, and by the time the Ewok celebration began (along with the digitally created 'bonus scenes'), she had two fluffy buttermilk pancakes sitting on a plate in her lap and a fork in her hand.

Efficient service.

"Did Teal'c tell you about Kinsey's arrest, Sam?"

She stopped with a forkful of pancake halfway to her mouth. "Kinsey's arrest?"

"The photos Daniel didn't show you last night."

Sam had the feeling that she'd missed out on a mothership's worth of explanation. "Those were of...?" She blinked. "They let you take photos...?" Carefully, she put the fork down. "You went to arrest...?"

"I'm guessing you haven't seen the morning paper then," the Colonel picked up the newspaper they'd brought in with them. The headlines screamed, SENATOR ARRESTED ON CHARGE OF TREASON!

Sam blinked. "Why?" Then she realised, "He was in on this?" A tiny nub of anger ignited in her, before she quelled it.

"Yeah," Colonel O'Neill said. "When he-had you, he called Vadim."

"What he didn't realize was that not only did Vadim's phone keep a record of the call, but so did the Capitol," Daniel explained.

"He was stupid enough to call from work," the Colonel added.

She looked from their intent expressions to Teal'c's emotionless one. "Why?"

"He did not appreciate being indebted to aliens."

"Godless aliens," Daniel corrected. "Probably as little as he liked Earth being reliant on godless explorers," he added, dryly.

"That's where we've been the last couple of days," the Colonel said as he sat down heavily on a chair and dug a cushion out from behind him, tossing it at Teal'c, who caught it.

"Actually," Daniel corrected him, "The last couple of days we spent in a hotel room in DC watching reruns of 'I Love Lucy' on Lifetime..."

"And persuading O'Neill and Daniel Jackson not to do bodily injury to each other," Teal'c remarked serenely from his position on the floor. He met the glares of their team-mates with aplomb. "They were restless from our confinement."

"You just walked in there and arrested him?" Sam asked, disbelievingly. There were still some things that she wasn't quite getting, and the whole idea of her team walking into Capitol Hill was just...

"Well, it was a bit more complex than that," Daniel admitted. He shovelled a forkful of pancake into his mouth. "It shot biggen whun weir comm bark--"

"Daniel, that's disgusting," the Colonel pronounced and took over the tale.

Over the next hour, between the Colonel, Teal'c and Daniel, Sam got a fairly good picture of what they'd been doing in DC while she was in the infirmary recovering and feeling sorry for herself.

"So Kinsey's out of our hair," she said at the end of the long tale.

"Pretty much," the Colonel said as Daniel collected his plate. "Don't know if they'll find a court they can try him on charges of treason, but at the least he won't ever practise politics again, and the Air Force will keep a very close eye on him."

Sam nodded as Teal'c took her plate away to the kitchen. Then she sat there, feeling more than a little overwhelmed by the way the guys had just decided to insert themselves back into her life.

In the kitchen, Daniel and Teal'c were discussing one of the FBI agents whose attitude had gotten on their nerves. The Colonel was watching her from where he sat, as though he expected her to say or do something. Exactly what that might be, she didn't know.

She still wasn't entirely convinced that they were here because they still considered her a part of SG-1. A part of her was still waiting for the walkout, for the 'your black ops mission is over, thank you very much, goodnight' line. That was the way the Air Force worked. You screwed up, you betrayed trust, you were out in the cold. Maybe not out of the Air Force, but certainly off the team.

Last night, their presence had been the tip of the iceberg. She'd shut them out for her own sanity's sake, because she'd almost resigned herself to being alone again. Nobody to rely on but herself, nobody to disappoint but herself, nobody to live with but herself.

And yet, they'd turned up late last night, when any other group of people would have gone home and not bestirred themselves until morning.

That had to mean something.

The hope was almost more than she could bear.

"You know that this doesn't make everything better," she said, deciding she could address this now.

"I know," he answered, leaning forwards and staring at his cup. His pose reminded her, somewhat uncomfortably of the things she'd said to him the last time he was here at her house. "Did you really want to leave SG-1, though?"

She didn't dare answer that one. "Are you sure you could trust me, sir?" Cynicism stained her words. "I might be playing you for a fool behind your back again."

He regarded her over his coffee mug. "Then it'd better be for a good reason," he replied, easily enough, although there was an edge to his words.

Sam paused. Should she say it or just leave it? Better to say it, get it out of the way. She stared down at her hands, "Sir, what I said about...about your time on Edora..."

"You meant every word of it, Carter," he said, but his voice was quiet. "And you were right - mostly." At her stillness, one corner of his mouth turned up slightly. "I can admit when I'm wrong - I'm old enough to know it. And I did give up on you, and Daniel, and Teal'c ever bringing me back. That was my mistake and I won't make it again."

The apology was unexpected. She stared at him for some long, quiet moments before she managed, "I still shouldn't have said what I did."

He sat back. "Probably not," he admitted. "But you did a good job of it." The dark eyes fixed piercingly on her. "For what it's worth."

His tone of voice made it clear that, while he might be willing to forgive her bluntness, it wasn't going to be entirely forgotten.

Sam stared at the muted television, watching the weatherman silently explain the weather of the coming days.

It wasn't going to be all better immediately, she wasn't so stupid as to think that. But at least she now had a chance to work at it. Now that Vadim was behind bars, and Kinsey was being prosecuted, now that Maybourne had gone on the run and wouldn't be showing his face anytime soon, and she was out of it all...

Maybe.

"So," he said finally, deciding that she wasn't going to be any more forthcoming. "You willing to give us another try?"

She was.

* fin *



 


Feedback:sky_diver119@yahoo.com

HOME

 

 

1