I swear, Tseng will hunt us down no matter where we go. If he needs to talk to us, he can find us and he'll walk in on almost any situation unannounced. He does it to Rude just as much as he does it to me. I swear, since we'd gotten a female Turk, I wondered if he'd be the type to waltz into the ladies' room if need be.
I say that because he walked into the men's room to find me. Geesh... He can't wait another thrity seconds for me to get out so he can give me my mission?
So there I am, eliminating the past few cups of coffee into the urinal, and he's talking to me in his icy tone telling me that I had to go to the slums. I'm only half listening to him, half trying to ignore the fact that he's watching you-know-what the whole time. I had half a mind to redirect my aim, but I knew that if I'd done that, he'd be sure I had nothing left to aim with.
So, he tells me I'm to find this young woman, Aeris. Well, she's not any woman... she's an Ancient. The last one at that. Yeah, I knew all about her. She's the one that's eluded him all these years. Seems he wants some young blood like me to take a crack at it. Right, like it's any secret that he has feelings for her. Ha.
Anyway, I finish my business and I'm stepping away from the wall when I feel his hand on my shoulder pushing me so I have to face him. I see his eyes looking down.
"Come on. Let's see it," he said.
I knew exactly what he meant, and Tseng's just the type of guy you can't ignore. It's no wonder he's our commanding officer, it's just that he flaunts his authority at inopportune times. Like now.
So fine...I show him my wares. He starts laughing and walks away, leaving me thinking to myself just how much I'd love to fuck him up the ass with it. And just to make myself clear on this, I'll say that it wouldn't be a loose fit either.
Anyway, forgive my fantasizing. So, I went down to the Sector Five slums as ordered. I'm not in a good mood the whole way, and I don't really feel like putting up with the idiocy of the soldiers that accompany me. I may be a Turk, but I'm not heartless...like Tseng is, but I assume some year I'll get like him.
Hey, I did my best down there. It just seemed that some ill sense of timing had dropped an ex-Soldier into her lap. Cloud...how could I forget those Mako eyes? Well, Aeris got away courtesy of the ex-Soldier. I scampered off to save my own neck and returned to base empty-handed. Drat... I was hoping to make quick work of it to shove under Tseng's nose to show him how much better I was than him. Fine. No sense making him mad.
It seemed, however, that Shinra was a little more interested in eliminating a recently developed rebel group that was causing headaches all around Midgar. Headaches in the form of blowing up Mako reactors...
Hey, I didn't care how they intended to do it. I didn't even care if I was to have any part in it or not. But soon, I found myself in Heidegger's office with the Ice Prince himself, Tseng, standing by as I'm given orders to blast the Sector 7 plate release system in order to bring the sky down on Avalanche's hide-out in the slums.
To my dismay, Tseng insisted on accompanying. Seemed good ol' Rude had scouted around and found the Ancient accompanying the Avalanche terrorists into various sectors of the slums. The details were between them. I had my orders. The fun stuff, you know. The kind of stuff that if I don't haul ass out of there in time myself, the sky would come down on me as well.
I often wonder if Tseng might have had thoughts about trapping me up on the Sector 7 pillar before it exploded. You know...oops, the helicopter just can't make it to the rendez-vous point in time. Sorry...
Yeah. I wonder if he would've cared.
My job was to stall Avalanche to keep them from stopping the detonation but then trapping them on the pillar for the main event. I must say it was fun showing myself up to the Mako-eyed soldier, denying him victory over me. I took a number of shots from him and from his Avalanche friends. As the countdown reached its final stage, the helicopter came around. I know I bailed a little early, but I didn't want Tseng flying off without me, so it was now or never at the time.
I fared pretty well against an ex-Soldier. Walked away with a few routine bruises and a laceration in my right arm. A few stitches, and I was out of the infirmary and back into the hands of my superior.
Well, if he had any expression on his face, I'd say he was happy. It takes getting used to reading his blank stare yet getting something out of it. He'd gotten the Ancient and deposited her into the hands of Shinra's resident mad scientist, Hojo. Hmm...so much for his intense feelings for the girl. He didn't seem interested in saving her.
"Reno..." he said, freezing me as I went to leave his office.
I turned back toward him, returning the icy stare.
"The rebels got away. They were last seen in Wall Market."
I shrugged, though still trying to figure out how they'd made such a fast escape without me knowing. Hey, forgive me, but my orders were to drop the plate, not be sure that each member of Avalanche died traumatic deaths.
"That's not my fault," I said, throwing a lack of feeling back at him.
"Wise guy..." he muttered getting out of his seat. I'd grown immune to that look of potential menace. "You failed to bring me the Ancient. You fail to eliminate the terrorist group. I think a little encouragement is in order."
Yeah, I know that drill. It's actually his little way of giving us pep-talks, pushing us to strive to do better next time. I don't totally fault him; it usually works. Of course, his belittling talk is sometimes accompanied by a swift punch in the gut to serve as a reminder, so I at least prepared for that to come. But this time, it didn't. I'll tell you, those stomach-punches are a lot better than what he had in mind that day.
He roughed my right arm a little bit, knowing I had a recently sutured wound there. I fought the urge to flinch, but soon he had me firmly held by the arm with it wrapped behind my back. As I was fairly defenseless, he grabbed my other arm and locked my wrists together in standard issue handcuffs.
I think I was still trying to figure that one out when he reached around me and quickly unbuckled my belt. My pants dropped to my ankles and I felt his deft fingers probing me from behind.
I heard my nightstick clatter to the ground. Not like my hands were free to use it, but I suppose it made him feel better knowing that I was as defenseless as I could possibly be. He pushed my chest down on the desk and kicked one of my ankles to get me to part my legs. Resisting was for one, futile, and two, a way to let him know he won. I didn't try to stop him. As if I cared what he was doing. As he was determined to shame and hurt me, I was determined to be the victor and show him I can take it.
I'm sure my iron discipline pissed him off more as I refrained from grunting or moaning even as he entered me first with his fingers and then with something larger. Thankfully, resisting the need to groan or yell took up a lot of my energy and attention so for a while I was hardly aware of the way he was invading my body.
The real challenge came when he reached a hand in front of me and began stroking my shaft. Damn if the thing didn't go hard on me. That's the one thing I had little control over. His movements intensified, and I began wondering if that trickle I felt down my leg was his semen or my blood.
After he was through with me, he lifted my upper body by grasping the back of my collar and yanking me up. "Clean this mess up," he said, throwing me to the floor. I didn't see him leave, but I heard the door close behind him.
My hands were still cuffed, dammit. Behind my back none the less. A second warm ooze was felt in my arm as I knew the rough treatment and wrist-shackling had torn open my fresh wound. I cringed as I forced myself to roll up to a sitting position and part my knees to check on the other trickle. Damn. Semen *and* blood.
I thought back to it and tried to verify with my clouded memory to be sure I hadn't given him the satisfaction of even the faintest moan. With various bruises all over my body from the fight with the rebels, it's amazing I had actually succeeded in my quest of silence.
I actually always had the feeling he was a pervert, especially since the bathroom incident a while back. Guys would be guys, I assumed back then, thinking little of the incident.
I tried to stand, but had a hard time as my pants were still around my ankles, kind of making another shackle of their own. Five minutes after the event I'd rather forget, Rude walked in to my utter horror.
He threw his jacket over my mid-section and removed the cuffs. Thank God we all have the same handcuff keys, as he released my hands quickly. He asked if I was all right then let me redress my lower half before he turned back to face me. I handed him back his jacket and assured him I was fine, but there was no hiding what had gone on.
"Tseng's a bastard," he said, putting an arm around me so my weight wouldn't collapse my wobbly knees under me.
"No shit..." I cussed, limping slowly along.
There was something about Rude's embrace that was just so comforting. I kept telling myself it was just because of what had recently happened to me, but...I really, really enjoyed that moment.
"You should go to the infirmary," he said, noticing that my limp wasn't improving. Honestly, Rude... I felt like saying, though each step felt as though my ass was ripping apart.
No. Anything but the infirmary. Dammit, Rude, I've just been fucked and raped by our own boss. Did he think I was anxious to broadcast the fact all around Shinra? Hello, Rufus... would you like a piece of my ass, too? Hey, Scarlet, Tseng beat you to it! What did he think!?
On the other hand, if he was going to escort me all the way there under his arm... Oh, shit...I yelled at myself. You just got fucked by the coldest hearted man in Shinra and now you're enjoying a gentle embrace from a big, strong, muscular, bald-headed Turk who barely says three words all day!?
A gentle embrace. Hmm... Why was Rude being so tender. I swear I felt him pull me closer every few steps. His heart seemed to bleed for me. Though he held me against him firmly, he was so careful with me as though I broke easily. His big hand cupped the ball of my far shoulder as we walked, and it was like an aura of protection radiated from him and made me feel more at ease.
Naw...I mentally quarrelled with my confused state of mind. It's the dizziness from loss of blood. It's the recent event that had gone on involving my ass and genitals. It's just Rude's instinct to help a member of his team...his brotherhood.
Any way, between my bleeding arm and my other bloody region, I had no choice but go back to the infirmary. I think I made a lot of mental noise to drown out Rude's voice as he relayed the facts of what had happened just as I had told it to him. I was examined and treated then sent home to rest for one to two weeks in order to fully recover from my fight with Avalanche.
Rude drove me home. His eyes remained shaded by his dark glasses. His stoic expression because of that was killing me.
"Rude...?" I asked, then ran through a hundred combinations of words in my head. How do I ask it...?
"Mmm...?" he acknowledged me.
No. I couldn't say it. What if my groggy state of mind was merely imagining things? How would I face him when I returned to work if I'd gotten it all wrong? In fact, I wondered if I really was starting to like him or maybe it was just a twisted state of mind the anti-biotics or painkillers had put me in. Doubts...dammit! I had his attention; what should I say?
"Thanks..." That's what I said. Damn, how anti-climactic. How wrong that was... that wasn't what I'd wanted to say to him. Maybe, though, it was better that I did.
A while later, I found out that Tseng had written my incapacitated condition off as injuries I sustained in the fight against Avalanche, failing to go into the gory details of course. Yeah, what was he gonna tell anyone who found out my ass had been bloodied...? The ex-Soldier rammed his sword up my rear while my back was turned. I was a bit surprised...it was the biggest break Tseng had given me in a long time. No problem with me. I'd rather tell people my limp was due to a bruised knee or something than give the real cause.
Even after I'd recovered well enough to return to work, I avoided him. It sickened me to think he must've enjoyed that too, knowing I could no longer look him in the eye for the violation he'd done. I had the chance to pay him back, though.
It was quite a while later in Shinra's quest for the Promised Land while trying to stop an assumed-to-be-dead warrior named Sephiroth. It was in the Temple of Ancients to be exact. Tseng made the ominous discovery that the Temple contained not the way to the Promised Land...but the secret of the Ultimate Destruction Magic.
A lot more had gone on leading up to this, actually. All the while, though, I refrained from asking Rude the question that had been nagging me. Sadly, my infatuation with him hadn't waned, and I was really wondering what on earth I was thinking. It definitely hadn't been the pain killers...these feelings are natural!
Anyway, Rude and I hadn't accompanied Tseng and the new Turk, Elena, into the temple. We stayed outside on patrol and only went in when a half sobbing young Turk (that's Elena...) came running out of the pyramid swearing revenge on a certain Cloud Strife for the death of the Turk's leader.
Forgive me, but my eyes opened wide in delight. Rude followed me up to the summit where the altar room was. Against the wall was the prone figure of our leader and my nemesis, Tseng.
He wasn't dead. That moron, Elena. I nearly grabbed my Master Level Cure Materia out of instinct, but one look at Tseng's pained eyes, and I hesitated. Oh, how I loved to see that. One whose heart had frozen over. Come on, Tseng, I mused. Show me a little repentance. The cure doesn't come easily.
He coughed up more blood, and I seriously began to wonder if it was too late for Cure Materia. On the other hand, if the healing spell couldn't save him, perhaps it would prolong his misery. Hmm... Choices, choices...
Rude knew very well why I wasn't too quick to save him, and it seemed he fought back his urge to tackle me for posession of the materia. He stayed back, though, hovering behind me as I felt that protective aura again. Not like our leader was getting to his feet any time soon. I was really enjoying it.
When Tseng mustered the strength to look up at my eyes, I savored the moment in order to grin wickedly back. The desperate look in his eyes pained me for a moment, but I simply recalled the invasion of his flesh into mine, and I was able to ignore his pain. He knew damn well why I was reluctant. I guess he wondered why Rude wasn't intervening and perhaps drew the conclusion that I might have confided in the other Turk and won myself an ally.
To prove I'm not so heartless, I must confess an inner quarrel that was pulling me in both directions at once. Rude solved the problem by wrenching the Cure Materia out of my bangle and using it himself.
Tseng was bleeding bad, and I savored every drop. Rude stabilized him with the materia, but we still don't know if he's gonna pull out or give in.
I sat next to Rude in the waiting room in the lobby of the infirmary. I must have looked troubled because he asked if I was okay.
"Yeah..." I dropped my head pathetically, and my action is rewarded. He touched my back lightly with his hand.
He knows I'm not upset about Tseng's condition. He must know how I feel inside since the rape. If Tseng lives, I'll be vulnerable to his attack on me again. Damn. Maybe Rude could detect my secret desire to see our vicious leader put in the ground for what he did. Hell, that's why I hesitated with the materia.
Rude has a heart, though. He hardly ever shows it unless one of us is in trouble. I guess had Tseng fucked him, though, he might not have taken my materia to cast Cure on the man so quickly.
"Rude..." I start again. This time, I'm blunt. Damn, just say it, my mind shoved me ahead. "Do you love me?"
The light touch of his hand on my back never went away...never even budged. His momentary silence killed me.
"I'll protect you, Reno," he said plainly.
Was that it? Did he not believe me? It was a stupid question, wasn't it? Two straight guys, been business partners for years, and I ask something retarted like if he loves me or not. Damn. Maybe I felt too secure under his brotherly protection. I guess I'm the one deceived here. What did I really expect him to say to that?
"Because I love you..."
"What...!?" I asked, stunned though I shouldn't have been. Did I hear that or was it just my stupid, nervous mind?
His light touch became the full pressure of his hand against my back. His palm stroked the middle of my spine and tangled with the long red ponytail I always wore. Tingling...every nerve of my body delighted at the sensation. Rude was touching me, softly...tenderly...! A flutter raced through my chest, I could've almost passed out.
I was disappointed when his hand abruptly withdrew. Maybe he was shy. Oh, then again we're in the lobby of an infirmary, and we're not alone. Okay. I understand.
So, satisfied that feelings between Rude and myself are mutual, I presently find myself wondering what will happen if Tseng survives...if the hospital staff can replenish his blood supply and bring him out of the coma he's in.
I wonder what I'll say to him...or what he will say to me. Will we just go on as if nothing happened? Will he show a little remorse? Is his ice-cold shell fragile enough to break because of this, or is it solid enough that he'll just blow off the whole experience and go back to being the Tseng I've always known?
Or will he die and that will be it? Will I never hear him beg me to forgive him? Will I never see his soft side, if it at all exists? Or will I be deprived of hearing a heart-felt appology from him which will set our lives down completely new paths?
Hey, I have Rude to protect me now. If Tseng dies, what need would I have for the big bald man then? Would he still feel the affection to guard me so compassionately? Would I never experience Rude doing me gently, loving me so to make me forget the rough, unloving treatment I'd gotten from Tseng? Yes. That's what I want, despite Tseng's invasion of my body. I trust Rude. I want to experience Rude. I guess he'll have no problem with that. I'm glad I asked. Damn, I'm glad I'd asked!
So the only factor right now was Tseng. Sephiroth's sword penetrating him hadn't made up its mind yet. Was he to live...or die? I think of the repercussions should one event or the other happen. I think of how it could affect me and Rude. I think of what I want to happen.
A tear rolls down my cheek. Neither option sounds good.
THE END
Disclaimer: The characters, places, and events in this story are the property of Squaresoft, Ltd. and are not being used to make money. This original story was written by "Zeng" and is © 2000 by the author. This story was written for the entertainment of yaoi fans over the age of 18.