Worst Episode EVER!


On the whole, I have considered "Where on Earth" to be a high quality series. However, with every TV series, there is always an ep or even a whole season that just doesn't sit right. I have listed here the top (or bottom) ten eps that either have serious flaws or should never have been made; making them, as the Comic Book Guy would say, the worst ever.

"One more step, and this script is toast." #10
"Dinosaur Delerium"
Described by many forumers as the end result of the writers getting drunk while watching "Jurassic Park", "Dino" would be a halfway decent ep if not for the fact that it's a complete rip-off of the movie. The clues are okay, the dialogue decent and the characters are pretty much where they should be, though why Carmen would ever want an army of dinosaurs is beyond me. Not to mention the fact that the roof off the Taj Mahal wouldn't be near enough to keep them from eating her.

"This ep is so terrible, I could just cry!"

#9
"Can You Ever Go Home Again?" Part 1
This ep actually has some good components and powerful emotion in it. Unfortunately, it also has a number of fatal errors.
First of all, stealing ugly modern sculptures from private collectors is not Carmen's MO; this was propably done to accomodate what had to be a fictional character (Avalon). Carmen later on saunters back in Avalon's home in full thief costume; and though her rejection is moving, it's hardly unexpected. In the meantime, Lee Jordan has decided to begin his criminal career again, but not as a master; he has switched from stealing museum pieces to TV's at Bargain-Mart. He also hangs out with a goofy-looking guy with half his IQ. At the end of the ep Carmen barges into her home through the window and demands Avalon's release, which is remarkably unsuccesful; sneaking in would have been smarter and more her style (its her house, after all...what would be so hard about it?).


"I am NOT doing that scene again. Stop screwing up your lines!"
#8
"Retribution Part 1"
When this one first started, I was thrilled to see another Detective Carmen episode. Unfortunately, it is missing one major component--SUHARA. It's like chaos theory...since Suhara does not exist in this dimension (and is replaced by a version of the Chief, a sometimes humorous but overall poor substitute), Carmen did not recieve any of her Zen training. Therefore she jumps and kicks around like Ivy and has none of her patient, confident demeanor that is so uniquely Carmen. In addition, whoever did her voice in this ep needed some acting lessons...primarily when she laments about the Titanic and when she says, "Maelstrom, you're a madman!"


"Phew...this episode stinks, Ive."
#7
"Retribution Part 2"

I liked watching Carmen work with Zack and Ivy. I didn't like knowing that she was probably doing this because if she didn't, the two inexperienced kids would end up in little pieces...I don't know what posessed the Chief to let them go after Maelstrom. (He doesn't even seem worried, though he acknowledges that Maelstrom was a real bad guy.) Carmen seemed in a trance the whole time, as if she was sleepwalking, and I can't figure out what would posess her to have any respect for this guy. The bit with the cap and ship was a bit much (I would speculate she wanted to bury his memory and get rid of him.) She also seems strangely depended on her high-tech equipment in the 4th season in general, although an entire 1st season ep was dedicated to the fact that she could do well enough without them.


"Who wrote this script?!"
#6
"The Trial of Carmen Sandiego"
Barely into the ep, Carmen does a very un-Carmenisitic move by leading Zack and Ivy through a series of deadly booby traps. Then there is the introduction of the much-hated C5 Car. Everyone's lines (particularly the jokes) are forced and sound terrible. Though reuse of footage is common, I've never seen the producers so desperate to integrate scenes from the opener into the story. But the most disturbing thing about this ep is that Carmen has a definite mean streak. She gets the detectives to rescue her from Traitor (even if they just want to jail her afterward), then tricks them into giving her the Magna Carta, then thumbs her nose at them...it's all very humiliating and very unprofessional for a dignified thief like Carmen. There is also a little annoyance that should have never been introduced...and thy name is Josha.



"You're going to stay and say your lines with the rest of us, and you're going to like it."
#5
"Retribution Part 3"
Having been humiliated by the lowest of life forms--tourists--Carmen loses it completely and runs in circles like a madwoman. The prime example is when she decides she doesn't want the Paris bombing/robbery to be blamed on her; so instead of changing her clothes or entering carefully, she barges in the Opera...and even if the cops knew beforehand that Carmen Sandiego didn't normally blow things up, they certainly were going to connect her to the crime now. She also decides she wants to gloat in front of Maelstrom by taking his missile remote and holding it in front of him...rather than tossing it over the rail. Though Maelstrom goes to jail, he's got more points in his favor and Carmen has essentially been beaten--even with the detectives' help--by a far lesser character.


"I don't think the contractors are gonna deal, Carmen."
#4
"Curses, Foiled Again."
At the beginning of the ep, Carmen gets caught. You read that right. She later breaks out, but the damage has been done...in that instant she is transformed from an untouchable goddess into a nuisance. This sort of thing should have been reserved for "CYEGHA 1" (and would have made her capture scene even more powerful). The detectives aren't all enthused...they essentially say, "We caught Carmen!...so, lunch?". If that isn't bad enough, her "unreachableness" is sacrificed for a pathetic plot--a streak of bad luck--that is much more applicable in a Wal-Mart processed series like "Sabrina the Teenage Witch".


"How do you expect me to work with this terrible material?"
#3
"Can You Ever Go Home Again Part 2"
Where do I begin? Essentially, this ep could not have been written if it had been in truly in the best interests of the Carmen universe. But here's a quick rundown: Carmen has the power of a wet noodle, and can't do even the simplest of tasks or solve the simplest of problems. Zack and Ivy go after her even though Lee's the problem, and even come close to killing her once in a stupid attempt to get her aircraft on the ground. The C5 Car, which holds together as the detectives drive up the side of the Washington Monument (you read that right), falls apart only a couple minutes later. Lee is no longer not even an immature criminal genius, just a common thug. The Chief has no concern for Carmen whatsover or what she's going through. (There has been speculation, however, that he was jealous when she started seeking her "real" father, as the Chief claims he was a surrogate.) And to top it all off, Avalon gets the Soap Opera Disease--amnesia--and conveniently forgets everything pertaining to the case.

#2
"Cupid Sandiego"

It may not be fair to denounce an ep no one in the US has ever seen, but keep in mind that the reason FOX refused to show the ep because it was "substandard". And if FOX thinks something is substandard, well, you got a problem. My guess is that the network wanted to keep its promise of having at least one show that was both educational and had strong female characters (after they made such a big deal about it). Dressing Ivy up as a doll in a dress and handing Carmen a rather pathetic scheme probably wasn't on their list of things to do.

And topping the list as the worst episode EVER...


"It's not my fault!"
#1
"Timing is Everything"
No Carmen fan anywhere has ever had anything good to say about this episode. It opens with Carmen planning to steal a sofa, of all things. The original idea might have had merit--what would it be like if somehow something had happened to Carmen along the line and she was not the master criminal we know--but it is terribly executed. Her unsure character is going for eerie but just passes off as annoying. Probably the most obvious thing is that Carmen would not have spent seven years working for someone who is obviously nuts--no matter what happened to her in prison. She would have either done her own criminal work, overthrown him, or gone into some completely different field. As with all time travel episodes, there are a number of holes in the script as well.