A man and his wife are having trouble getting pregnant, so after much 
deliberation they decide to make an appointment with a fertility therapist.

"Well," says the doctor, after they had explained the problem, "there's
nothing physically wrong with either of you--he's not shooting blanks, and
she's as fertile as the Napa Valley.  So your problem must be psychological.
I'd like to talk with both of you individually."

Alone with the husband in his office, the doctor asked him to explain in
vivid detail exactly HOW he tried to get his wife pregnant.  "Tell me all
about it," he says, "from start to finish."

"We're both very busy," replied the husband, "so we have a schedule:  every
Monday, Wednesday, and Friday night, we watch the eleven o'clock news, and
then after that, I give 'er the old college try.  But, day after day, three
times a week for a year and a half, I give it all I've got...and nothing
works."

"That's the problem right there!" said the doctor, "you're too structured
about it.  It's just a humdrum routine, like taking out the dog or gassing
up your car.  If you want it to work, you have to have a little spice.
Surprise her, give it some spontanaiety.  The next time you get the urge,
don't wait for the eleven o'clock news to be over--just let Nature take its
course whenever you feel like it."

"Egad!" says the man, "I think you're right!  By Jove, I'll try it!"

Nine months later, the husband and the doctor are playing golf together, and
as he tees off for the thirteenth hole, the husband says, "Oh!  By the way,
Doc, I took your advice on how to get pregnant, and IT WORKED!  My wife is
due any day!"

"That's fantastic!" shouted the doctor, "yippee and hooray!  Tell me all
about it!"

"Well," said the husband, "a couple of days after you told me what I should
do, my wife and I were eating dinner together, when she dropped her napkin.
She bent over to pick it up, and when she did, the sight of that beautiful,
luscious ass right in my face drove me wild!  I couldn't help myself!  So I
picked her up, sat her on the table, took off all her clothes, and went at
it like mad, right then and there, with all I could muster. It was glorious!
The best I ever had!  And now we're going to have a little girl!"

"Marvelous!" said the doctor.

"It is," said the husband, "but there IS one drawback."

"Oh?" said the doctor, "and what would that be?"

"Well," replied the husband, "they won't let us into McDonald's anymore."