The Moral of the Story

One day, at the end of class, little Johnny's teacher has the class go home 
and think of a story and then conclude with the moral of that story ... 

The following day, when the teacher asks for the first volunteer to tell 
her or his story, little Suzy raises her hand. "My dad owns a farm, and 
every Sunday we load the chicken eggs on the truck and drive into town to 
sell them at the market. Well, one Sunday we hit a big bump and all the 
eggs flew out of the basket and onto the road." The teacher asks for the 
moral of the story, and Suzy replies, "Don't keep all your eggs in one 
basket."

Next is little Lucy: "Well, my dad owns a farm, too, and every weekend we 
take the chicken eggs and put them in the incubator. Last weekend, only 8 
of the 12 eggs hatched." The teacher asks for the moral of the story, and 
Lucy replies, "Don't count your eggs before they've hatched."

Last is little Johnny. "My Uncle Ted fought in the Vietnam war; his plane 
was shot down over enemy territory. Before it crashed, he jumped out with 
only a case of beer, a machine gun and a machete. On the way down, he drank 
the case of beer. Unfortunately, he landed right in the middle of 100 
Vietnamese soldiers. He shot 70 with his machine gun, but ran out of 
bullets, so he pulled out his machete and killed 20 more. The blade on his 
machete broke, so he killed the last ten with his bare hands." 

The teacher looks in shock at Johnny and asks if there is possibly any moral 
to his story. "Yes, maam," Johnny replies: "Don't fuck with Uncle Ted when 
he's been drinking!"