Sorry I don't have the homework 'cause.....


I was in a store and a robber held everyone up at gun point.  All the store
had in the register were checks so the robbers got angry and were about to
shoot everyone when, thinking fast, I grabbed my homework and textbooks and
convinced him that an education was more valuable than any amount of money.
He took my books and all my papers but didn't shoot anyone, although I
almost didn't offer him because I value my education almost as much as my
life, but I couldn't let him shoot all those innocent people.

I spent the entire night working on it, but I just wasn't proud of it, so
I'm going to work on it again tonight.

Well, this lady was giving birth in the middle of nowhere.  I heard if you
don't have anything around, one of the most sterile things you can wrap a
newborn baby in was newsprint.  All I had was my homework and text book....
you understand don't you?

It spontaneously combusted... nearly burned our whole house down.  
Fortunately everyone except the goldfish managed to escape.  Poor Skippy.

I felt it wasn't challenging enough.

You see, I was doing my homework outside when a U.F.O. landed in the field
next to my house and a little man came out and I felt he needed a gift
because he had come so far and so I gave it to him, honest.

My mother forgot to do it.

I was doing it on my computer when it suddenly bleeped and I lost everything
I had done for the past FOUR HOURS and I was too tired to redo it but I will
have it by tomorrow.

I was too emotionally traumatized after seeing on last nights news the
tragedy and human suffering that is unfolding in Bosnia.

I used it for the bird cage lining.

I was about to do it, and then, well, I just got to thinking about how much
you look like Sharon Stone...