Author: Merrianna

Story: Christmas Sorrow: Prologue: 0 of ?

Series: Speed-Burn

Rating: R

Pairings: Mac/ Stella

Summary: Stella and Mac try to handle the first Christmas after the 9-11 attacks

Spoiler: none given

Category: Angst, Romance and Humor

Setting: Right after 9-11, well before the Series starts.

Disclaimer: I don't in any way own the series CSI. Those are the sole property of Anthony E. Zuiker, Jerry Bruckheimer, CBS and Paramount Home Entertainment.

Distribution: Please ask first?

Note: Warning sexual content.

Feedback: Yes, please? Especially constructive. merriannadragon@yahoo.com

Webpage: http://www.geocities.com/samwise_baggins/index.html

New York City was alight with Christmas lights from Brooklyn to Manhattan. Everywhere you turned there were the trappings of the season. Whether you were Christian, Jewish or some other denomination, there were decorations for whatever holiday you were celebrating. It was as if everyone sought to stem the depression that had fallen over the city due to the wrekage that used to be the World Trade Center.

On the fifty-third floor of the NYPD building, the head of the Crime lab stood looking out over the city that Mac Taylor had made his own. He was sleep deprived and a little worse for wear, having been through another day of cases that seemed to involve the dregs of New York, another reminder of man's inhumanity to man. He'd let his hair go and there was two days growth of facial hair on his chin. This was something that would never have happened before the Towers had fallen. By the end of November some people had said that he seemed to be getting better, but as December started and the city steadily became immersed in the holiday season, the man had fallen further back into depression. Those who had said he was getting better knew very little about the man. His partner of a little over three years, had known that it wasn't that he was getting over the death of his wife, but that he was shutting down any feeling that had to do with the people around him. He reserved a show of emotion for only those who were closest to him. The job was what drove him; it was all he would allow himself to have.

Stella strolled up to the open door of Mac's office. She was determined that he wouldn't spend this first Christmas without Claire alone. That was something that the dead woman wouldn't have wanted for her husband. She had been a woman who enjoyed life and everything that came with it. She had loved holidays, not just Christmas, but Halloween, Thanksgiving, New Years, even St. Patrick’s Day... the only one that didn't make the list of important days was Valentine's; she had said it was silly that people needed a holiday to tell their loved ones that they loved them; what did they do the rest of the year? Stella could still hear Claire's voice when she'd said it, too. It brought a small sad smile to her lips.

"Knock, Knock." Stella said, interrupting Mac's quiet contemplation of New York and the open space that used to be dominated by two reflective buildings.

"Hey, Stella. Going home?" Mac stayed as he was, as if he didn't have enough energy to face the curly-haired woman who'd entered.

Stella contemplated the man for a moment before replying, "Yeah... Why don't you come with me? We could order take-out Chinese and watch something on TV? What do you say?"

Slowly he turned away from the window, looking over to where Stella stood. From her point of view he looked a little dazed. It lasted for a few minutes before he shook his head. "No thanks, I've got some paperwork to go over."

Frowning, Stella walked over to him, placing a hand on his shoulder, "Mac, there's nothing on your desk that can't wait. I promise that you'll be able to make it in tomorrow without too much of a headache. Besides, I really don't want to be alone." Stella knew it was a dirty trick, but she was determined that he wouldn't be spending the holiday in the office doing paper work.

Mac gazed at her for several minutes before he sighed and nodded his acquiescence. He laid a hand over hers, giving it a quick squeeze before letting go.

Stella removed her hand with a smile on her face. She refrained from rubbing her hand as it tingled from the touch of her friend's bare hand. She fought with herself over feelings that she had thought were gone. Now was certainly not the time to have them resurface; after all, his wife had only just died.

She focused instead on having won a small victory in getting Mac to put his work on hold for one night.

They silently went to the locker rooms and gathered up their things before heading out to the snow-covered streets of New York.