Cor-Ai

By RPonda

 

Jack was ticked. He was angry with his government and Hammond for not supporting him, Teal’c for not being willing to leave, Carter for, well, for being Carter, and Daniel. Also, if he was willing to admit it, he was angry with himself. The problem was, Daniel was the only one he could do anything about.

 

Daniel was in the locker room changing into civvies, when Jack walked in.

 

“Daniel, my place, 1900 hours,” Jack stated.

 

“Sure, Jack,” Daniel replied resignedly. Damn. Daniel knew it was an order, not a request. He’d been over and over what happened on Cartago in his head. He realized Jack was angry, but didn’t think he deserved the brunt of it. He’d done what he’d had to do in order to avoid a firefight. It was what he did. Jack just had to understand that this time.

 

Daniel knocked and entered, without waiting for Jack to answer the door. Walking into the kitchen, he watched Jack spoon up the Chinese takeout. If he wasn’t careful he was going to start hating Chinese food. “Hi, Jack. Chinese takeout?” he asked taking the plate Jack offered.

 

“Yeah, thought we could eat first,” Jack answered.

 

They sat down at the table. Daniel managed a few bites, and then started pushing the food around on the plate. Jack noticed. “Not hungry, Daniel?”

 

“No, not really,” Daniel answered. He was never hungry on nights like this.

 

 “Well I am,” Jack said, continuing to finish the food on his plate.

 

After he finished eating, Jack questioned, “If you’re done, we can talk in the living room.”

 

Daniel stood up. “I’m done, Jack.” Taking his plate to the sink, he scraped it and put it in the dishwasher. He headed into the living room, with Jack following. After he sat down, Daniel began, “So, what did you want to talk about, Jack?”

 

“You’re behavior on the last mission,” Jack answered, getting to the point.

 

“Fine, talk. I’m listening,” Daniel said, not without some attitude.

 

“Why the attitude, Daniel?”

 

“Sorry,” Daniel replied, taking off his glasses and pinching the bridge of his nose, “it’s nothing. It’s been a long day.” Daniel didn’t think he would agree with Jack this time, but he was willing to hear him out.

 

“Yes, it has been a long day, for both of us.” Jack ran his fingers through his hair. “Maybe we should talk tomorrow.”

 

“I’d rather get it over with tonight, Jack, since I’m already here.” He didn’t think another night would make any difference.

 

“Fine,” Jack sighed. “Why the hell did you step in front of my weapon?”

 

“I couldn’t let you shoot those people. They were just trying to find justice,” Daniel answered.

 

“I don’t care what they were trying to find. I could’ve shot you!”

 

Daniel sighed. “You wouldn’t have shot me. You’re too good, Jack.”

 

Jack stood up, pacing. “Dammit, Daniel! The gun I was carrying has a hair trigger. It doesn’t matter how good I am. When you pushed it down, it was all I could do to keep it from going off and blowing you away.”

 

Daniel paled. “I-I didn’t know.”

 

“You didn’t think. You just acted, on your own, again.” Jack dropped down in his chair. “You can’t keep doing this to me, Daniel.”

 

“I’m sorry. You’re right. I didn’t think first. I didn’t know it was that dangerous.” Daniel had been more worried about keeping Jack from harming the native population than the fact he’d put himself in danger. “But I’m not the only one you’re angry at right now.”

 

“No, you’re not. However, you’re the one I’m talking to right now. You’re also the only one I can take care of.” Jack and Daniel had made a deal. In order to stay on the team, Daniel had to accept corporal punishment if his behavior was reckless or dangerous.

 

“I know we have an understanding, but part of that understanding is my agreeing I deserve punishment.”

 

“And you don’t agree?” Jack questioned.

 

“I didn’t agree,” Daniel responded. “I’m not so sure now.”

 

“What’s changing your mind?”

 

Now it was Daniel’s turn to pace. “I truly didn’t realize the danger I’d put myself in. I only thought I was stopping you from overreacting.”

 

 “Overreacting!?” Jack shouted. “They were getting ready to confine and possibly kill a member of our team!”

 

“I know,” Daniel said quietly, cringing at Jack’s wrath, “but I knew there had to be another way.”

 

“I didn’t, Daniel. Even if there was, all you had to do was tell me, NOT touch my weapon, let alone walk in front of it.” Jack couldn’t have handled it if Daniel had been shot with his own hands.

 

Daniel stood, hugging himself. “I know that now, Jack. It won’t happen again.”

 

“It’d better not happen again, or you’ll suffer more than a strapping.”

 

“Jack…”

 

“No, Daniel, you deserve it and you know it.”

 

“Yes, I do, and I’ll accept it, but…” Daniel hesitated.

 

“But what?” Jack was tired of discussing the matter.

 

“But what bothers me most about that mission is what happened later.”

 

Jack shook his head. “What are you talking about, Daniel?”

 

Daniel turned, facing the fireplace. “When you went back to the SGC, the Jaffa came through.”

 

“And,” Jack prodded.

 

“And, I was a coward,” whispered Daniel.

 

Some of Jack’s anger was replaced with concern. “How were you a coward?”

 

Daniel never turned around, but he did answer the question. “We were trapped in the council chambers. Teal’c had his hands tied behind his back, helpless. I didn’t do anything to help him. I let the Jaffa drag me away, leaving Teal’c to deal with Shak’l on his own.”

 

Jack walked over to him, placing his hands on Daniel’s shoulders. “There was nothing you could do for him. You didn’t have any weapons. You would have been killed yourself.”

 

“I should have done something,” said Daniel, condemning himself.

 

Jack wasn’t sure what to say. Daniel was so good at feeling guilty for his own perceived inadequacies. “I don’t agree with you…” Daniel started to object and Jack stopped him. “However, if it will make you feel any better, you can let your punishment count for both incidents.”

 

“Okay, Jack,” he said, finally turning around. “Let’s get it over with.” He walked over to the armchair he’d bent over the last time, and began to undo his pants.

 

Jack stood beside him and removed his own belt. When Daniel had bent over the back, he lowered the boxers and asked, “What are you being punished for, Daniel?”

 

Daniel answered, “For putting myself in danger by stepping in front of your weapon, and for being a coward.”

 

“No, Daniel,” Jack stated.

 

“No?” Daniel queried, confused.

 

“You are not a coward. You’re one of the bravest men I know. However, I will allow the punishment to count for feeling like a coward.” Jack placed his left hand in the middle of Daniel’s back. “Do you understand the difference, Daniel?”

 

“Yes, Jack. I understand.”

 

“One more thing. You need to take control of your own punishment.”

 

“Huh?”

 

“I’ll administer it, but I want you to tell me when you’ve had enough. I’ll stop whenever you tell me. If I don’t agree, we’ll discuss it.” Jack hadn’t liked finding out the last time that Daniel had been abused as a foster child. Daniel had been beaten without having any control of the situation. These punishments were a means to remind him to not take risks. Jack just hoped Daniel wouldn’t be harder on himself than Jack would be.

 

“Okay, I’ll tell you when to stop.” Daniel liked the idea, but wasn’t sure it would work.

 

Jack brought his belt across Daniel’s backside. Daniel yelped, and then went silent like last time, except for the tears running down his face. Jack continued to bring the belt down time after time, marking Daniel’s sit spot and upper thighs, as well as his butt. Just when Jack was ready to stop, whether or not Daniel told him too, he heard Daniel yell, “Enough!” Jack stopped his arm midair. He rubbed Daniel’s back until the crying eased. Then Daniel stood up, fixed his clothing, and crossed his arms over his chest. Jack pulled him into a hug. “You okay?”

 

Daniel held back from the hug for a minute, he still wasn’t used to being comforted. Finally giving into it, he answered, “I will be, Jack. I’m tired though.”

 

Jack released Daniel, keeping an arm around his shoulders. “You know where your room is.”

 

“Yeah, I do.” Daniel rubbed his backside absentmindedly. “Good night, Jack.”

 

“Good night, Daniel.” Jack sat down on the couch to watch a little TV before he too went to bed. Thinking of all Daniel had been through in his life, he was continually amazed by the strength of his friend.

 

The next morning Daniel woke to the smell of waffles, and coffee. He carefully crawled out of his bed and then took care of business. When he entered the kitchen, Jack handed him a plate of waffles and a large cup of coffee. Jack had noticed the last time, that although Daniel didn’t eat much the night of a punishment, he would eat a good breakfast.

 

“Morning, Daniel.”

 

“Morning, Jack,” Daniel responded. “Been busy this morning?”

 

“Ya think,” Jack said smiling. “I thought you might be hungry.”

 

“I am.” Daniel sat down carefully on the chair. He poured syrup on his waffles and dug in. After a while he noticed Jack watching him again. “Jack, stop.”

 

Jack shook his head to clear it. He hadn’t even started eating his waffles. Realizing he was staring at Daniel, he apologized, “Sorry, Daniel, just thinking.”

 

Curious, Daniel asked, “About what?”

 

Jack considered what he wanted to say. “I still worry about whether I’m doing the same thing to you, that your foster father did.”

 

“You’re not, Jack,” Daniel replied, drinking his coffee. “It’s not the same at all.”

 

“Why isn’t it? What makes what I’m doing different?” Jack had been worrying about the difference all night.

 

“Jaaacck,” Daniel sighed. “If you’re that worried, why do you do it?”

 

“I’m not sure. I’m thinking maybe I shouldn’t.”

 

“Not that my butt wouldn’t prefer that option,” he stated, “but you didn’t answer my question. Why do you do it?”

 

“Oh.” Jack knew in his heart why he’d started disciplining Daniel, but he found it hard to put into words.

 

“Well,” Daniel prodded, when Jack didn’t answer.

 

“I want you to stop risking your life.” That was always Jack’s goal. He didn’t want to lose his best friend.

 

Daniel pushed a little more. “Why do you care if I risk my life?”

 

“Because I care about you. I don’t want you to die, again,” Jack answered honestly.

 

“That’s the difference.” Daniel ate some more of his waffle.

 

“Huh?” Jack was smart, but had yet to connect the pieces.

 

Daniel decided to spell it out for him. “Jack, you care about me and what I do. My foster father didn’t. He was an ass. All he cared about was control, and hearing me scream. He wanted to prove he had the power. He enjoyed the pain he gave me.” Daniel could remember seeing the satisfaction in his foster father’s expression, as he lay on the floor crying after a beating. “You don’t.”

 

“You’re right. I don’t enjoy using my belt on you.” Jack thought back. “You know, my dad used to say he didn’t enjoy punishing me, and I didn’t really believe him then. I do now. He just wanted me to stop being so headstrong and think first.”

 

“Too bad it didn’t work,” Daniel teased, as he finished his coffee.

 

“Daniel…”