FOOL'S CHICKEN

IDFers too struggle with the perennial question -- why did the chicken cross the road?

STEWIE: first of all, let's check if there's enough mustard on the other side of the road to have the Chicken cross it.

GEJ: my name is Chicken. I'm a young female ISO new emotions... if you're hebrew and interested in oral sex, you can be my mister right. Call me 1-800-Chik.

STEFANO: the Chicken won't be allowed to cross the road unless she crossposts it to 3 newgroups at least.

ANGELUS: Chicken, why? Let's talk about it.

SERG1: Chickne? In what sens? In this sens? Eliss, come hlep me.

KANOZ: To get to the other side.

AMY: I don't really like chicken.

IPE: Does the chicken want to marry me?

BOTOLO ELETTRICO: I especially like turquoise chickens.

EDI: There are no chickens like Sicilian ones.

BEAMRIDER X: The chicken embraced the anticryptogamic movement and crossed the road to show to the whole world that he is now one of us.

SANDRINO O' MAZZULATORE: It was most likely cheated by GMER.

KEROPPI: There are solutions to the field equations of general relativity in which space-time has the structure of a four-dimensional Klein bottle and in which there is no matter. In each such space-time, the claim that "the chicken didn't cross the road" is false. Therefore the chicken did cross the road.

GALUSCIO: hello, I'm the real Chicken.

CIROPIZZA: yes, yes, but I can cross that road better than that.

LENINGRAD COWBOY: who cares? It's just a chicken. Rotfl.

ELISS: Chickens crossing a road? Saw that movie. It's crap.

LORD BEOTIAN: The simple thought of crossing the road is beyond my wildest immagination.

HOW TIRED: You dumb! Didn't you notice the chicken was a fake of mine?

FRENZ SHABOO: I like to bring up little chickens in my imaginary garden. They don't usually cross the road because I love them.

DIO SPORTIVO: Galuscio, stop it!

MARBILLAY/PROPHETESS6: That chicken is a newbie for sure. No worries, I'll take care of it.

ANTINOO: Just crossing the road? How banal and absolutely garish. If that chicken was Me, I would have stopped in the middle of the road and shown with a smile My great actorial abilities to Aluccia and My beloved fans, while crossing that Sunset Boulevard.

MARTIN VENATOR: I knew it. It finally happened. The chicken crossed the road. It's amazing how easily thoughts come to mind, how tasty is the memory of a peaceful porch and the games we played there. Nobody could see that, but inside of me there was an entire world of chickens, ready to cross that road and that for sure, in a distinct moment in time and place, would have done that. Just for me. Yes, maybe that eyes staring at me did make me change my mind, and that's why I find myself now where I am (not that I'm going to talk about it, since it's only a state of mind. We are in no place actually.), all by myself, without reasons, without chickens if not in a secret garden where they're free to cross all the roads they want. No cars, no bikes, no silly people asking them to do things they already know they won't do, they are not able to do, they are not supposed to do. But that's it. Images. Green eyes, brilliant feathers in the sun, soft coocoos echoing in the porch. But I know that it's only a matter of keys, basically. Somehow, somewhere, in the mist of time there's that key that will release all the chickens living inside of me. I know I will find it in that porch. How to go there? Maybe I'm already there. In the end, it doesn't matter. What matters is the thought of things to be. And chickens, of course.

MENTHOS: the chicken crossed the road only to be devoured by Jimmy the little holothurian. After which, I exploded upon request.

ULISSE: th e ch i ken cam e fir st, then t he e g gg.

COLLIDER: to go and see an old guy named collider, does anybody remember me? c.(hicken)

LAURA MARGARIA: to have an haircut, maybe? By the way, I'm hungry I think I'll have snack. La'

FELIX: porcapippetta

BEPPE SINCLAIR:
you chicken come to me
with excuses
i Need This
crazy what you could have been
crazy what you could have had
i 'm need
-less

101: 09:50, Hey sweetie, I'm crossing the road, you know how much I love you, one million kisses... Chicki

KANOZ: To get to the other side. To get to the other side. To get to the other side. OH STUPID MOUSE!

NIUBBO: How does this chicken-crossing-the-road thing work?

LURKER:

GUARDIANO DEL FARO: the official reason is to cross the road. But I know it's all Beam's fault.

PUNKIE: oh, what a cutie chicken! Chicky chicky chicky

CHI_SQUARE: depends. I would like to introduce you an interesting point of view, directly related to Planck's interpretation of discreet chicken psychology, which says that fried eggs are better than roasted ones, which I empirically proved in a charming restaurant in Marienplatz. Anyway, the answer is 42.

MAGENTA: Sob! Fuck the chicken, I'm losing my colours.

INDIGO SHEEP: Speaking of colours, look at me. The real question is: why didn't the sheep follow him?

BLACKSTORM: Hey, Lui', did you see that chicken there? And remember, this is what friends are for: to share the emotion of watching a chicken crossing a road. Oh damn I am touched. Hug me.

PLACH: This is not a road, neither is that a chicken.

Thanks to Beamrider X and Stewie, who have provided most of the entries