"Have you been in the cookies again?”
”I ate a couple last night.”
”Oh Fred, what about your diet? The doctor said no sweets.”
”You don’t understand. I ate a couple last night. Two people. A man and a woman.”
”I know it sounds like I’m nagging, but you’ve got to take care of yourself.”
”I didn’t eat any cookies. I ate Danny Williams and his girlfriend.”
”I know you like to indulge, Fred. So do I. But those empty calories just pile up on you. You know that.”
”Are you listening? They were parked on that dirt road just past the bridge. I came upon them and killed Danny before he knew I was there.”
”And this staying out all night isn’t healthy, either. I worry about you, Fred.”
”I started eating him before I killed Janie. She was screaming and beating on the window and trying to get away.”
”The kids are starting to think you don’t love them anymore.”
”I held her by the arm, though, and grinned at her while I tore the flesh off of Danny’s face. She didn’t know it was me, of course. Not at first.”
”Fred, I have to ask … is there another woman?”
”What? I’m telling you I’m a werewolf, subsisting upon the flesh of men. I ate Danny Wilson’s heart last night, raw and whole.”
”Just tell me the truth. If there is, then … well, we’ll go from there. Just don’t lie to me. That’s the one thing I couldn’t stand.”
”I didn’t even kill Janie before I started eating her. I just started biting hunks of meat from her arms and legs. She was dead by the time her limbs were gone, but before she died I told her who I was.”
”Oh, God … Janie. God, Fred, she’s only sixteen! I can’t believe you’re screwing Janie Davison.”
”I’m not screwing her, Helen, I’m digesting her.”
”Oh Fred, she babysat the kids for us …”
”Not anymore, Helen. She’s dead. I can still taste her blood in my throat. Hers and Danny’s. I bathed in their blood last night, and wrapped myself in their entrails. It took forever to wash off.”
”Look at me … now I’m crying. Why, Fred? What could she give you that I couldn’t?”
”Well, 120 pounds of meat I could never eat you, Helen. I love you, and the kids love you. We need you.”
”Oh, it’s all well and good to talk about love now, isn’t it? If you loved me, you wouldn’t have done what you did.”
”That has nothing to do with it. I did what I did because I was a mad, ravenous beast, unfettered by human morality, and bound by my curse to kill and eat those unfortunates who crossed my path.”
”And you mentioned Danny, too. My God, did you … with Danny, too? Oh God …”
”Helen …”
”That’s just sick …”
”Helen!”
”What?”
”Listen to me, Helen.”
”Bu –“
”Listen. I did not cheat on you with Janie or Danny or anyone else. I just turned into a huge furry beast and slaughtered them. Then I ate them. Do you understand?”
”You … you … ate them?”
”Yes.”
”Well … did you save any of the blood?”
”What?”
”Fred, there’s something I have to tell you, too.”