A Male Submissive's Pride?
These are my words. While I cannot speak for every submissive everywhere, I'm sure that what I have said here will be consistent with the feelings of at least the majority of submissives, male or female, everywhere.
So please, read on.
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Recently I had an online conversation with a "so-called" Dom. I say so-called because if he (caps left off on purpose) had of been a true Dom, he would have known the answer before he ever asked the question.
The question was this. "How could I, as a 'MAN', ever allow 'MY' woman to tell me what to do? he (again, caps left off on purpose) went on to ask "do you not have any pride as a man????
It didn't take me long to answer, and my answer is really what started me thinking about letting A/any and E/every O/one in on our conversation.
My answer was simply a few questions of my own.
I asked him if he was married? he said yes.
And then I asked him if she knew about this "side" of him? he said no (typical of so many online Dom/mes).
The obvious question then was "why not?". he said that his spouse would not understand.
OK, I've been in that situation before, but really wanted to know more, so I asked a few more questions.
Q, The last time you and your wife bought a new vehicle, who decided what kind to buy?
A. I did.
Q. Who decided what color?
A. Actually she picked out the color.
Q. When you and she go out for the evening, who decides which restaurant to go to?
A. Sometimes she does, but usually me.
Q. When the two of you go dancing or drinking, who decides what club you go to?
A. Ordinarily we go to the one right up the street, it's close, but at times she asks about a bigger club across town.
Q. Do the two of you ever go to a movie or some other kind of show?
A. Of course we do.
Q. Which one of you decides what you are going to see or hear?
A. It's a joint thing, sometimes her, sometimes me.
Q. When the bills are due, if you are ever a bit short that week, who decides what bills get paid?
A. We discuss the situation and mutually decide what gets paid.
I feel rather sure that he was giving fairly honest answers, because there was little or no hesitation before I got the answers to my questions. So then I asked one more,
Q So, when you wanted white, but bought a blue car, you wanted chinese, but ate italian, you wanted the local crowd, but bumped shoulders with strangers, you wanted rock and roll, but listened to bluegrass, you wanted to pay discover, but paid visa instead, did any of that hurt your pride?
It took forever to get an answer for this question, (I even thought that he had disconnected for a minute or two). But then this came back,
"No, why should it?".
This is what I had to say,
That really sounds like OUR house. I have my input on the majority of issues, it's just that Mistress has final say so on all things. Why should it make me less of a "man" because I choose to let my Domme make the final decision?
Just because I want Mistress to decide what color car WE drive, or what food WE eat, or which club WE go to, what show WE see, or what bill WE pay, does that mean I am not a "man"? Or any less PROUD?
Being a submissive is not a matter of "pride", but rather a choice of lifestyle. I have never met a submissive that wasn't proud of serving his/her Dom/me. Nor have I ever met a submissive that served their Dom/me out of a lack of pride.
So, I have this to say to all of the would be Dom/mes in the world, as well as any and all submissives on their quest for fulfillment in this wonderful, offbeat, kinky lifestyle of O/ours,
Yes, I have pride!! I am proud of Mistress, I am proud of me, but mainly, I am proud of US!
Yes, Mistress has the final say so in any and every thing WE do, regardless of what that may be. I am "PROUD" to show my "colors", are Y/you??
Words by,
OtherSidesPet
08-25-2003
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