LONG
..LABIA |
In
some cultures elongated Labia minora
are considered both a sign of beauty and an enhancement to intercourse.
A wife of this sort is considered more able to please her husband, assuring
his happiness and a good union. Indeed, long labia are a genetic trait
apparent in some isolated populations. Brides so characterized are the
ones most sought after. Thus they marry early, have more children, and
thereby reinforce the trait in the population over time. Women without
the trait marry later or outside the population.
If one observes
the function of the labia during intercourse, it is obvious some women
in modern society do grasp the shaft more than others. This stimulation
of the shaft outside the vagina is significant but usually considered less
important than vaginal stimulation.
Women of
Dahomeyan culture reported playing with each other to elongate and thicken
their labia prior to marriage. In other cultures labia
stretching is performed both alone and in
groups. Rather than an overtly sexual act it was considered a normal practice
similar to grooming hair or skin. In other cultures more spreading
labia or wide labia are valued over elongated
ones. |
FEMALE
EJACULATION |
The
Archives of Sexual Behavior (Volume 19 Issue 1) reports than 82% of surveyed
women report G-spot sensitivity and 40% have experienced fluid release
("ejaculation") during orgasm. While experts disagree on the origins of
the fluid, most of it is generally believed to originate from the Paraurethral
glands or Skene's
glands. Research has shown these glands capable
of producing 30-50 milliliters of fluid in less than a minute. There are
other glands that produce fluid, mainly serving for lubrication of the
vagina. True female ejaculation is associated with orgasm rather than vaginal
fluid production which may begin at the first signs of arousal. It does
not originate from urination though some women may release small amounts
of urine (as can men) during very intense, uncontrolled orgasms.
Only some
women report a visible "spray" similar to male ejaculation. For many it
is merely a small accumulation of fluid or slow dripping. For those curious
about the phenomenon there are novelty adult videos on "squirting" performed
by actresses accomplished in this manner. One actress has made quite a
living from it, even giving stage shows around the world where they allow
such things. By slow motion viewing one can clearly see a sudden expulsion
of fluid at the peak of orgasm. |
THE
BLENDED
OR DOUBLE
ORGASM |
This
is achieved by double stimulation, providing simultaneous orgasm from two
sources. In women it is produced by stimulating the G-spot and clitoris.
For example, licking the clitoris while inserting two fingers upwards and
inwards into the vagina can produce this more intense sensation. Some women
also experience the blended orgasm while receiving intercourse while a
third person rubs, licks, or vibrates the clitoris.
Men can experience
blended organsms by simultaneous stimulation of the prostate and penis.
Since anal stimulation is a taboo for many males, researchers believe the
male blended organsm is not as widely experienced as the female version.
Some researchers
dispute the concept of the vaginal vs. clitoral orgasm, suggesting they
are one in the same occurance. That said, it is abundantly clear that female
orgasms are more intense when the means and locations of stimulation are
diverse. |
WHOLE
BODY ORGASM |
This
is one of the goals of Tantric sex.
It differs from he so-called simple or genital orgasm in that sensations
pulse throughout the entire body including the arms, legs, and upper torso.
Others suggest the whole body orgasm is the only true orgasm and that all
other quickie orgasms
are really incomplete ones. But most people can relate a more intense orgasm
experience that seems to send rapid pulses, contractions, even shivers
throughout one's entire system. It has even been described as a momentary
electricution of the entire nervous system.
Some practioners
emphasize the blended orgasm
(see above) while others suggest one source of stimulation is sufficient
over very long time frames - such as two to four hours. It is thus ideal
to seek out BOTH quality and quantity of stimulation to assure the best
effect. As one sex coach said "if you have any doubts....you didn't have
one". |
CONVENIENT
LESBIANISM |
While
some women choose lesbian relationships in total freedom, others form sexual
relationships with other women out of pure convenience. Wherever women
are forced together with little access to men some things are bound to
happen.
Throughout
history lesbianism in harems has been very common. The king or "master"
may only pleasure a women a few times a year - if at all. She had no access
to men or if caught was sure death sentence. (Though cases of hiding young
men dressed as women was common). It was accepted practice in such arrangements
for women to satisfy each other's needs. Indeed it was sometimes part of
the hierarchy the women established among themselves with some women serving
and others being served.
The
Kama Sutra in "Behavior in the Gynoecium"
mentions that "the nurse's daughter, female companions, and servants dress
up in male clothes with jewels and fabricate sexual organs with roots,
carrots, aubergines [egg plants]. Then lying on the women they satisfy
them by means of this artificial copulation". This reminds us that some
"convenient lesbianism" is not always what we understand today as one woman
admiring the body and femaleness of another. It sometimes takes the form
of transvestitism or imitating a male body to one degree or another.
Studies document
that lesbianism among military wives is more common than the general population.
This is due to extended periods of time their husbands spend away from
home as well as the strong bond military wives always seem to form. There
is also a perception this is an acceptable means of avoiding adultery.
Likewise during WWII when many men were in Europe and women met in the
workplace, a great many lesbian relationships developed - some only admitted
in these more recent, accepting times.
It is not
surprising too that all women's schools with strict security and dating
policies have higher incidences of lesbian practice - though most particularly
among girls already used to frequent sex. Lesbianism is also common in
polygamous cultures where one forms close, daily ties with one's co-wives
or sister-wives.
Here again the one husband may not be able to satisfy all the women all
the time. Sister-wife sex
and marital sex are viewed as two very different things; two separate forms
of bonding in the family. Indeed some prefer to avoid the potent term lesbianism
altogether for such intrafamilial relations. Since many cultures prescribe
just one nocturnal mate for the polygamous husband, his other wives surely
may desire some enjoyment among themselves.
Sometimes
"convenient lesbianism" has been convenient for societies which often pretend
it does not exist. Some have considered it a viable alternative to co-ed
situations where pregnancy is a greater risk. We understand there is one
Korean subculture where lesbianism is thought be a suitable phase prior
to marriage, keeping the daughters "virgins" while satisfying their sex
drive. There has been some connection throughout history with lesbian
inititiation as part of sex education prior
to marriage. In other words, knowing yourself and your gender before learning
about another. The term awakening
has been applied in such instances since it allows sexual experience and
education without compromising the popular concept of virginity relating
to intercourse with males. It also allows strict segration of the sexes
without denying sexual expression. As we will mention later there are cultures
where male homosexuality is a phase or experience taught prior to marriage. |
ORIGIN
OF THE DILDO |
We
can only speculate that some woman somewhere discovered that inserting
a smooth branch, vegetable, root, or bone gave a pleasurable effect. Perhaps
she even found a smooth phallic-like stone in a river bed and it suddenly
looked better than her smelly, burping, crude husband Ug. It could have
been a root vegetable, banana, corn cob, gourd, or tuber though the size
of modern produce is a development of this century's knowledge of genetics.
Some plants such as the soft growing tips of bamboo, young gourds, and
cat-tails (particularly if moistened) closely resemble the penis and no
doubt could spark female curiosity. In the Marquesa Islands women report
masturbating with eels.
Wild female
apes also insert objects so humans may observed it from lower species who
supposedly have less "natural modesty". Others state that human females
learned very early to insert natural fibers, cloth, leaves, hollow stems,
and other natural objects into themselves during menstruation. Likely assisted
by branchlets ("applicators") this hygienic practice might have suggested
the potential for more pleasurable stimulation. Indeed, some women do enjoy
stimulation to relieve menstral cramps. Very likely all of the above things
happened somewhere since the experience of enjoying a dildo is a unversal
one based on similar anatomy. No doubt a good deal of experimentation,
that is trial and error, occured over the centuries until practical, optimally
pleasurable solutions and the "marital aid" industry immerged.
Another theory
suggests early dildo use may have been accidental. It is certainly possible
that naked or barely clothed women discovered clitoral stimulation in nature
before the insertion of objects. A woman may have bathed in water and had
aquatic plants or debris stimulate her. There is much variation among marine
and aquatic flora around the world to suggest a number of rich possibilities.
There has even be suggestion that women secretly masturbated and dildoed
themselves with captured fish in the privacy of bathing - these objects
even being half alive, wriggling, and often in a very phallic shape. Clearly
not all species are suitable but many could potentially be effective.
Another theory
suggests that men introduced dildos to women. Boys and men are certainly
curious about inserting fingers and objects into women. It is not uncommon
for a brother to suggest the possibility to his sister - the situations
ranging from abusive and crude to pleasant, humorous, and consentual. More
than a few girls admit to "losing their virginity" to a bar of soap, toy,
or hair brush. Often this sort of sex play may occur prior to the boy's
own knowledge of intercourse. The dildo is symbolic of their own penis
and is inserted as an experiment, a first discovery and exploration of
female space. It might also be an attempt to avoid the incest taboo (objects
not counting) or in teens from a fear of intercourse, pregnancy, or disease.
Even men with lots of sexual experience find dildo use very stimulating
because they can observe closely in a way that intercourse precludes. In
Faulkner's remarkable book Santuary he describes an apparently impotent
man who used a corncob as his surrogate penis
in raping a woman. Thus for some males use of a dildo is almost an admission
of their own sexual inadequency. The dildo for some men becomes a second
penis and thus a means of greater potency,
particularly when the natural one is exhausted and in a recovery period.
Timothy Taylor
in The Prehistory of Sex states that dildoes were a "widespread
phenomeon in much of human history". The archeological record clearly supports
this though your local museum is not likely to display them. Some scholars
suggest that ancient phallic objects were purely ceremonial but often their
form, functional ribbing, and wear clear suggest other uses! Obviously
some phallic objects are too large or crude for insertion but when near
lifesize and smooth we can reasonably assume a more intimate functionality
existed.
From an early
Upper Paleolithic culture we even have a surviving double
baton - a double
dildo in our modern terms. It is angled with
two organs for a clearly practical, sexual use. Even the Bible speaks of
committing fornication "with idols". We do know that Baal mentioned in
the Bible was a phallic god. Some found objects had holes and brackets
suggesting they could have been worn - likely by male priests.
The Kama
Sutra makes reference to dildoes used when husbands are impotent, to
merely warm up the woman, or with lesbians. They were made of gold, silver,
copper, iron, tin, ivory, horn, wood, rubber, and most dangerously lead.
Tin and lead were preferred as being both rough and soft at once. The dildos
were used by hand, attached with bands (ties) or a harness. If such crafted
devices were unavailable, the text speaks of using hollowed out pumpkin
(probably a long gourd), soft citron wood, or soaked bamboo. Small wooden
balls on a "rosary" or wrapped about a real penis were also proven.
The term
"dildo" derives from the Italian word diletto
meaning "delight". A great many words in other cultures exist for a similar
concept or act of using a dildo. |
THE
PRIMATE CLITORIS |
This
topic is matter of some curiosity but few people know about it or dare
to ask. The clitoris exists in all female primates but is particularly
developed in the higher species. It's role in ape sexuality is even more
of a mystery than its biological role in humans. The organ is largest (proportion
to body size) in chimps and gibbons. Chimps on average are well known to
be even more promiscuous, frequent breeders than humans. Since the penis
and testicles are very large in chimps (bigger than Gorillas even) it not
surprising the female clitoris is also so highly developed. It has been
suggested that chimps require such developed sex organs due to their breeding
strategy - one that does not encourage monogamy and requires a good of
random, casual pairing. Courtship, if it exists, is very brief and physical.
Chimp sex which can be quick, violent, and very brutal may rely on stimulation
of the clitoris to temporarily "charm" or make vulnerable the female to
the male's advances.
It has been
suggested that the reproductively successful male chimp is one that can
both stimulate and physically wrestle the most females - that is, win some
with pleasure and others with brute strength. A large, very accessable
clitoris would make foreplay both quick and effective from a biological
stance. Observation suggests some female apes seem to enter a trance-like
state during intercourse. As you might suspect there is not exactly a lot
of federal funding or university support for this kind of research, so
much material is the subject of speculation and informal observation.
Gorillas
have a harem system where a female is monogamous with a male until he dies
or loses authority. Thus there is less importance placed on simple stimulation
and sex play. Humans many suggest are intermediate between chimps and gorillas
on the monogamy vs. promiscuity scale.
Female orangs
are known to masturbate, stimulating the clitoris with hands, tails, and
objects. Yes, objects. We suspect you won't see that on a National Geographic
special about primate use of tools! Many primatologists have observed masturbation
and intercourse in apes that suggests female apes are capable of some form
of orgasm though perhaps less dramatic than in humans. |
POLY-POSITIVE |
This relatively
recent term is used to denote an attitude of being affirmative towards
polyamory and/or polygamy in modern culture. Let's look at some of the
"poly" words that might be brought under this state.
Polygamy
is roughly the same as plural marriage where
a person may have multiple spouses. These associations may or may not be
accepted by government and civil authorities but most always have some
form of religious or cultural ceremony behind them. The most widely practice
form of polygamy worldwide and especially in North America is correctly
termed polygyny.
This where the husband or man has multiple wives. The reverse is polyandry
where the wife or woman may take more than one husband. Most of the so-called
polygamy in the world today is really polygyny since those societies do
not allow the ladies the freedom accorded to men.
Polyamory
is a circumstance where couples agree to have other mates in a usually
defined set of relationships. Many polyamorists do not consider themselves
be true swingers
which seems to imply a greater degree of promiscuity, unsafe sex, and purely
physical bonding. Indeed, true polyamory is as much about love and friendship
as about sex. Polyamory may not involve any legally sanctioned marriages
at all though typically it involves married heterosexual couples sharing
mates in various pairings and group sex. Polyamorous associations are usually
more than sexual and involve a good deal of socializing, non-sexual bonding,
and may include cohabitation some or all of the year. Polyamory is usually
not the old wife-swapping
or spouse-swapping
but often involves couples enjoying their primary mate enjoying other people.
In practice, a good deal of polyamory involves two couples spending time
in a foursome that begins as something of a double date. |
SEMEN
TRANSACTIONS |
The
Sambia culture is a very fascinating one. They consider both semen and
breast milk to be sacred, highly prized fluids. Young men practice secret
homosexual fellatio based on the belief it is the only way for men to grow
strong. It is also considered a transfer of seman to the male for use in
his future marriage - a sort of seman transplant or transfusion just like
we use bone marrow or blood. Later they practice fellatio with women, believing
in some cases the semen actually translates to breast milk vital for their
children. Thus the powerful, sacred semen is transferred from tribal leaders
to young men. Later they transfer the potent resource to their wives (for
breast milk and child-bearing) and younger men to continue the cycle of
life and power. In this unusual bisexual culture semen is shared freely
as a resource of value to both genders. |
ROMAN
BROTHEL TOKENS |
Ancient
coins used by the Romans are known depicting both intercourse and fellatio.
Three basic designs were used, entitling the bearer to receiving the act
so depicted. The Intercourse coins were more valuable than the fellatio
coin. These "sex gift certificates" might be given to friends or employees.
Being made of gold such coins were at once art, wealth, and social status. |
NECROPHILIA |
Necrophilia
is about having sex with the dead or at least desiring it. It is certainly
one of the most taboo of all forms of sexual expression. It is thought
to be the most rare of major paraphilias (sexual deviancies) - though with
something so illegal and taboo one can never be so sure. In modern times
it occurs in funeral homes (big surprise) and the courts are full of cases
where persons are charged with such deviant practices. Often there is more
than one person involved and these are sometimes termed by the media as
"rings". Sometimes, we are told, these things begin as supposedly harmless
"work jokes" and become a sexual fetish for certain susceptible persons.
As one woman put it "I like my men stiff but not that stiff". More than
one mortuary student has found access to the most lovely body they've ever
seen more than a bearable temptation. We must in fairless note than most
funeral homes and mortuary schools have very professional standards for
conduct around bodies as do medical schools. The penalties for necrophilia
is most states and countries are as severe as for rape and child abuse.
Such abuses are very rare and represent only a handful of troubled persons
each year. A few years a very popular music video by Tom Petty with the
lovely Kim Basinger proved controversial for it's depiction of such an
obsession by a morgue worker.
Necrophilia
is also part of the psychology of some serial killers. They desire such
a level of sexual and physical control they enjoy sex with a just killed
body and sometimes just severed parts of it. The infamous Jeffrey Dahmer
was aroused by just pieces of the bodies of his victims. Homicidophilia
or lust murderism
are the technical terms for being aroused by murder of one's sexual object.
Much of the
taboo against necrophilia is for respect for the dead who are harmless
to prevent wrongful access to their body. There is also the concern for
disease transmission because many of the deaths in our human history have
been attributed to infectious diseases.
We have heard
of a practice that has been termed warm necrophilia.
A spouse may awake to find their long-term, beloved mate deceased in the
night and desire to "love them one last time". Certainly there is widespread
acceptance of kissing and touching the recently dead such as when a person
dies in one's arms. Many families find it very natural to kiss a departed
loved one upon visiting the home after a "passing". More extensive physical
contact including the sexual is obviously much more controversial and covert.
In a more vile form of warm necrophilia we have heard of cases where gangs
and soldiers have killed an enemy. In a ritual the members of the gang
or army have sex with the recently slain body as means of perverse bonding
and sign of contempt for the victim and their group. Black women in the
American south were sometimes raped before and after lynching, showing
one act of contempt and hatred after another. Warm necrophila is also quite
sadly a part of so-called snuff films
which may include sexual deviations before and after the staged murder.
In all due modesty we will spare you the details.
Necrophila
in ancient Egypt was not uncommon. The dead had powers. The wealthy, powerful,
royal dead have even more powers. Some of them were considered gods. Sex
was associated with the religious ritual and sacred things. Death and sex
rituals were two important parts of the culture, prompting people to integrate
them in hopes of gaining status and perhaps eternal life. You might imagine
the greater temptation this had for the practitioners of mumification who
viewed death and sexuality as powerful religious celebrations. There is
evidence that laws were added to prevent such abuses. It has even been
suggested that some of the whole"curse of the pharoah's tomb" stuff was
created to discourage people from hoping to gain some advantage through
necrophilia.
There is
also the rare practice of simulated necrophilia
where one partner "plays dead" to arouse the other. One woman told us she
covered her body with a whitish cosmetic to simulate blood-drained skin.
She covered herself in a plastic sheet, added a toe tag, and let her husband
go from there. Some people are fascinated by casket
sex which may be a related psychology. Sometimes
there is a vampire fantasy
involved where the lover simulates a killing by biting the neck. Simulated
autoassassinatophilia occurs when one is aroused
by staging a fantasy of their own murder. Others utilize a resurrection
fantasy where the lover brings the "dead"
one to life through sexual activity. The lover who pretends to be brought
back to life may turn the tables on the other, dominating them, and even
acting out a zombie fantasy.
All sorts of inspiration has been derived from viewing any one of a number
of horror films. |
AUTO-FELLATIO |
This is
the somewhat bizarre practice of men being able to fellate themselves -
that is suck or lick their own penis. Generally men capable of this "stunt"
have to be athletic, rather flexible, and have a sufficiently long penis.
Some men can barely lick the tip while others can even swallow the entire
glans penis or head.
In cultural
media we have generally observed this practice in gay, bisexual, and so-called
"bizarre sex" films. It sometimes performed at gay parties or by male strippers
for both men and women. It is something of a novelty since such capable,
talented men find masturbation the more desirable and convenient of self-stimulations.
It is not usually possible to sustain auto-fellatio over a long period
of time with any degree of comfort and prolonged pleasure. Only some men
are capable of inducing ejaculation by this technique.
John Money
in his article Man's Animal Nature (in Sexuality and Human Bonding)
notes that auto-fellatio is common in primates. Some apes may even swallow
the ejaculate. |
"VAGINA
DENTATA" |
The mythological
concept of vagina dentata relates to a psychological fear
of that vaginas have teeth. Freud and others said this related to a deep
seated fear of castration in males. Obviously there is a symbolic connection
between the mouth and vagina as both have labia
(lips). One vernacular name for the vulva or vagina is "the vertical smile".
The mouth substitutes for the vagina in oral sex. Lipstick, say the sociobiologists,
represents a socially acceptable suggestion of red, swollen vaginal labia
- an indicator of fertility and sexual intterest among the primates.
Males with
this fear, consciously or not, have an aversion to woman or at least intimacy
with them. One might imagine how easily such a myth might spread among
ill-informed young boys. But in older men the irrational fear of vagina
dentata has been used in past decades to explain homosexuality. |
FROTTAGE
AND
TOUCHEURISM |
Frottage
or frotteurism
is rubbing against unknown persons (usually female), often with the clothed
penis, for sexual gratification of some kind. Frottage usually involves
rubbing the clothed penis against a clothed woman's leg, buttocks, or pubic
region in a public place. Toucheurism
is similar but involves full use of the hands on an unknown female's body,
often including the buttocks, legs, crotch, and breasts. Both of these
practices usually imply a lack of permission and in this manner are distinguished
from activities such as tribadism and "dry humping". The term frottage
is sometimes used to indicate any public rubbing while standing, consentual
or not. Indeed some of the sexual fantasy involved in these practices has
to do with the fact the victims, usually women, are strangers. The term
toucheurism derives from the French toucher meaning touch.
Both frottage
and toucheurism are considered sexual deviations or paraphilias
(even by the most liberal minds) because they involve violation of personal
space and privacy. In most modern societies these practices are punished
by law. Psychiatrists have made a clear connection between toucheurism
in particular with propensity for sexual aggression
including rape.
Thus persons, usually men, having a fondness for or record of toucheurism
are often carefully watched. Attempts at either frottage or toucheurism
in a confined, secluded space is usually classed as attempted
rape by law enforcement authorities. For example,
a man finding a woman alone using a payphone who attempts to rub against
her would usually be subject to more severe charges than one acting so
on a crowded subway.
Frottage
is not uncommon in young males and is sometimes considered harmless if
outgrown towards puberty. There is sometimes an illusion that this activity
will please the girl and become consentual. The fact that some popular
dances and bar scenes encourage similar contact (thought consentual) may
encourage them. Yet older males may practice frottage almost as a hobby
- though frottage is rarely their exclusivve form of sexual expression according
to studies (Wilson, Glenn. 1987. Variant Sexuality: Research and Theory.
Johns Hopkins. Baltimore). Concerts, crowded noisy bars, and rush-hour
transportation systems (mainly subways, buses, and trains) are popular
locations for this activity. Indeed some devoted practioners of frottage
have been known to plan trips on subway trains during specific times when
it is most successful for them. These crowded public forums for frottage
provide some "cover" because the male may offer a false apology if caught
or easily disappear into a dynamic mass of other people. When alcohol is
involved such men often claim a sort of clumsiness or exaggerated intoxication
to explain their movements. Frottage and toucheurism is also common with
mentally defective (ie. Downs syndrome) or socially inadequate (ie. very
shy) men.
There is
a also a rare paraphila (deviant sexuality) which we may term frottophilia
for lack of an existing term. It refers to one being aroused by being touched
or rubbed by strangers in a public place. While most recipients of frottage
or toucheurism do not consent nor enjoy the practice, the occasional person
does. We have found reference to teen girls at rock concerts and men in
crowded gay bars admitting to enjoyment of the activity by others. It has
been described as anonymous, mysterious, and low risk arousal. |
ATUM,
THE SON GOD |
Egyptian
culture was more sexual than most of us have been told. As early as 2600
BC Atum, the Son God was portrayed masturbating himself. In their mythology
his ejaculate was considered the source of the Nile floods - which was
essential to their prosperity! |
RIMMING
OR ANALINGUS |
This
is the practice of using the tongue to lick and stimulate the rim or opening
of the anus; the so-called rim job.
The correct scientific time is analingus.
It is practiced by heterosexuals, gays, and lesbians but is often associated
with gay male culture. Fetish groups, websites, and magazines are devoted
to it. Considered a dirty practice by some, others say it is safe and clean
when washing and antibacterial soaps are employed. It is often used a prelude
to anal intercourse, stimulating the recipient to crave the act and be
more receptive. However many people (both men and women) report a great
deal of sexual pleasure from rimming without any intercourse. Rimming may
progress to full analingus which also involves placing the tongue inside
the rectum. Klismaphilia or
arousal by enemas is also practiced. |
MUMMY-BABY
LESBIANISM IN AFRICA |
Girls
in the Lesotho and Bastho societies in South Africa have been extensively
studied. Because males are employed in migrant work or are segregated in
schools, women of various ages often form close relationships. One female
asks the other to become either her "mummy" or "baby". Some women have
several relationships of each type. Emoitonally the friendship is very
close and is not always sexual - in fact in some schools sexual activity
is forbidden while the unusual bond is not. It almost always includes kissing
and hugging - which may or not may not be available from males. Even in
adolescents there may be sex play. In other cases, particularly with long-term
partners it becomes a more traditional lesbian pairing and a sort of polygamous
marriage system is created. |
PANSEXUALITY:
MAKING LOVE
TO NATURE |
Pansexuality
(sometimes equivalent to omni-sexuality)
expresses sexuality with and from all things, particularly nature. It may
be related to pantheism
(God is in all nature) in some contexts. Pansexual practice would include
normal (often bisexual) sex with humans. It might extend to a women rubbing
herself against a smooth-barked tree or a man with a soft carpet of moss.
The idea is about making love to or with the earth in it's fuller expression.
We have heard the term terrasexual
for love-making to the earth - Mother Earth or the earth goddess in particular.
Many cultures note the power of sexual gratification from the force of
a waterfall. Some integrate this lifestyle with blessing of crops by sharing
or conveying sexual energy. Seeds or tubers may be placed in the vagina
(the later acting as dildos) prior to planting so as to bless them with
sexual energy. In less typical cases there has been sexual appreciation
of the mystical power of large icicles and disgarded animal horns.
In many cultures,
including their modern New Age versions, having imagined intercourse with
unseen natural spirits is common. Satanists may speak of sex with demonic
spirits while the occasional Christian "cult" mentions intercourse with
the Holy Spirit - all of which reportedly watch over and manage the earth
domain. The use of crystals in modern sex ritual is very common irrespective
of their sometimes phallic appearance.
Men in ancient
cultures often had intercourse with natural rock or earth that resembled
a divine vagina
- often using animal grease and leaves to improve the process. In one extreme
example men of the tribe made holes in the ground to ritually have intercourse
with earth. Women may have hoped to improve fertility by rubbing themselves
against natural, phallic rock formations. We have heard that women have
been arrested for rubbing themselves against the famed rocks at Stonehenge
in hopes of attaining special orgasms or to become fertile. Some cultures
place value on transference of sexual power in high energy situaions like
volcanos, rapids, and during thunderstorms.
Not all pansexuals
practice bestiality
(sex with animals) but neither is it uncommon. In one culture men honored
the spirit of a slain animal (appeasing it perhaps) through ritual intercourse
and offering of seman. Others consider the "blessing of livestock" while
others seek to commune with a deity resembling some species. The pansexual
is likely to view sex as a transfer or sharing of energy rather than a
simple means of gratification. Thus for them bestiality serves as a positive
interaction rather than a form of abuse or domination. Of course bestiality
is very taboo and illegal in many modern societies. The connection among
humans, physical animals, and animal gods is a complex one to say the least.
Fur
in various states has also had a sensual, erotic appeal to humans. It is
not an uncommon practice today to masturbate or derive from rubbing against
fur clothing - particularly in women. This may be considered a derivative
form of acceptable bestiality though some say love-making with fur is merely
symbolic of pubic hair.
Some New
Age groups practice ritualized sex with collected natural objects of various
types. These may be rubbed on the body including the genitals to convey
a natural energy or lifeforce. A great many plant products have credible
healing properties in their phytochemistry and may be preferred for specific
ailments. Thus healing, massage, and sex may be integrated into one big
celebration of the earth's bounty. |
FEMALE
DIGITATION |
This
is one term given to the practice of pleasing the vagina with fingers -
popularly called fingering
or finger fucking.
For many girls this is among their most rewarding, early sexual practices.
Digital masturbation
is when a girl fingers herself. Whether by accident or ritual, fingering
has been part of deflowering or removing the hymen. It frequently accompanies
cunnilingus (oral sex) especially among lesbians. The "2 finger technique"
and "4 fingering" are almost legendary for the ability to produce strong
G-spot orgasms.
The related
term brachiovaginal eroticism
(know to sexologists as BVE)
relates to vaginal fisting. BVE may be the
final act after female digitation but such is not normally the case.
Use of a
single middle finger (similar to "giving the finger" sign) or index finger
may start the process before the women is relaxed. Another variant sometimes
called dipping
involved alternately shoving both hands (with fingers tightly held) into
the well-lubriated vagina - usually with the woman's crotch held upright.
Since it can be performed simultaneously by two or three lovers it may
be part of group activity.
One modern
example is where girls on a bus or train covertly sit on hands and fingers
(under their skirts), also deriving added pleasure from slight movements
and the vibration of their transport.
Variations
of the 4-finger technique
are numerous. A few are the following:
-
Finger Progression:
A single finger is inserted. Once the vagina relaxes or over a period of
time two then three then four fingers (on one hand) are inserted. The amount
of stimulation and pressure are increased. The four fingers may be held
close and flat like a wedge in Variation A. In Variation B they may be
bundled to form a round or triangular shape in cross section.
-
Side by Side:
two fingers of each hand are held close and inserted into the vagina in
an alternating motion, moving in and out as pairs. Usually the index and
middle fingers are used. In Variation A this is performed by a single lover.
In Variation B the fingers come from two different lovers working in tandem.
-
Dual Insertion:
two fingers are inserted into the vagina, moving in and out, usually focusing
on the G-spot. Two fingers of the other hand are inserted into the anus,
often alternating with the other set of fingers in the vagina. Variation
A is with a single lover, Variation B with fingers of two lovers.
|
THE
THIRD SEX |
We
learn from the Kama Sutra and other India writings of the so-called
Third Sex (tritiya prakriti)
. They were also called neuter or neutral but this not imply "neutering"
such as castration in most cases. Many were feminine in appearance and
walk - what we might term today a more effeminate gay man raning to tranvestitute.
Others retained masculine features such as mustaches and body hair. Those
who worked in prostitute were termed catamites
or hijra. All practice fellatio.
The Kama
Sutra tells us the tranvestite types were easily confused with female
prostitutes - which certainly occurs in our time! Others worked as masseurs,
hoping to offer a gentlemen that additional special service. The text describes
eight practices which range from complete fellatio with ejaculation to
simple rubbing without climax. It also states "if one wishes to, it is
customary to pinch the gigolo's nipples" though hugging was discouraged.
Also covered are brightly dressed, third sex
servants "who can be trusted for acts involving
the mouth". The authors notes some turn to women later in life while others
renounce them. |
POSITIONS:
"FOUR GIRL" |
Men
sometimes find themselves in a enviable situation when it becomes useful
to pleasure as many women as possible. The so-called "four girl" technique
is a creative way some have used. The man lies flat on the floor or bed.
One woman rides his penis after suitable stimulation. A second woman sits
on his face, facing the first woman, receiving cunnilingus from the man,
kissing and massaging the other woman's breasts if she desires. The two
facing women may even touch the other's clitoris at suitable moments. His
arms are outstretched with each hand offering fingers or a vibrator to
two additional women. If possible, the four women touch and kiss, sharing
each other's enjoyment, even offering their own hands for additional stimulation.
The woman often rub their own breasts and finger their own clitoris if
not those of another. The basic form with occasional change of position
is Variation A.
Variation
B of the technique has the same four women rotate positions at a fixed,
timed interval using a timer or alarm. In Variation C there is a also a
timed rotation but a new woman joins and one leaves in each cycle. This
is a type of male gang bang.
Variation D adds additional females to stimulate the man's nipples, caress
him, and touch the four primary women. The man may thus be smothered in
women touching him at every point. Variation E is performed by a woman
in place of the man using an attached penis on four other women. In Variation
F the "four girl" position is used to build a orgy with the four women
having additional partners whom they finger or lick, the positions expanding
outward in many styles. Variation G involves a man and six women with the
man using the toes of each foot to stimulate their vulva. |
COITUS
RESERVATUS |
The concept
of coitus reservatus is one of practicing prolonged intercourse
without ejaculation. The goal or focus is extended stimulation rather than
seeking to ejaculate. Some persons, including Tantric experts, speak of
multiple male orgasms which do not require ejaculation or use pressure
or mental exercises to supress fluid release. But in the true sense of
coitus reservatus we are referring to a general practice and not
any particular technique or religious philosophy.
Georg Feuerstain
in Sacred Sexuality says the practices was "known already to the
early Christian community" and was reintroduced by Bruno and Cathars. |
MODELS
OF BISEXUALITY |
Beth Firestein
in Bisexuality: The psychology and politics of an invisible minority
(Sage, Thousand Oaks, 1996) speaks of the trichotomous
model which considers bisexuality separate
from either heterosexual or homosexual orientations. There is certainly
a case for this model as opposed to existing dichotomous
model which involves use of a range of values
between homosexual and heterosexual extremes. The trichotomous or three
category taxonomy was first proposed, we understand, by Havelock Ellis
in 1905.
The lack
of models of bisexuality in earlier times may be attributed to the fact
that bisexuality was considered normal and universal in the culture. Georg
Feuerstein in Sacred Sexuality states that "bisexuality rather than
homosexuality was the rule in classical Greece. Indeed bisexuality may
have been widely practiced in pre-Christian times".
Beth Firestein
cites a study that bisexuals are much less monogamous than "true" homosexuals.
Only 29.5% of bisexual females and 15.4% of bi men want a lifetime, monogamous
partner. This contrasts with 46.7% among lesbians and 75.9% with gay males
who are seeking such a monogamous relationship. A study by Wienberg in
1994 states that only 16.4% of surveyed bisexuals were monogamous at that
point in time. This does not mean that bisexuals necessarily have more
mates over their lifetime than more traditional homosexuals or heterosexuals.
Rather than one lover at a time they may overlap their relationships with
several lovers at one time, dropping one and adding another.
She also
makes the statement that the trichotomous model is not perhaps fully correct,
saying "the bisexual person is, therefore, not holisticaly bisexual but
dualistically half heterosexual and half homosexual". Rather than bisexuality
being a range between heterosexuality and homosexuality it may represent
an inclusiveness of two very distinct forms of practice.
She also
identifies that bisexual often have many sexual
friendships as opposed to romances. There
are so-called cuddle buddies
involved as sleeping partners, kissing, and light touching. There are also
fuck buddies
with whom one has serious sexual relations and sometimes little else.
In her highly
praised book Firestein also speaks of polyfidelitous
marriages (the old idea of group
marriage in one form) that are changing how
we view that institution in modern times. Polyfidelity often involves bisexual
men and women living together or sleeping over in various combinations
- but always with a narrowly defined groupp of partners and sexual friends.
In the true polyfidelitous bisexual marriage
there are strong commitments to a set of lovers and mates - and one cannot
stay outside that group in most cases. The true polyamorous
marriage has less boundaries and is closer
to but distinct from open swinging
on the opposite extreme. |
PENIS
MODIFICATION FOR FEMALE PLEASURE |
In
cultures which give little concern for the female's pleasure (even denying
it exists) there is little tolerance of such practices. It may be said
that most males (having been circumcised) are modified to please women,
though it is usually argued circumcision is for the man's benefit. Some
women argue that circumcision actually dimishes their pleasure. There is
certainly some dimished risk of bacterial transfer when a woman has a circumcised
partner.
One method
of doing so is shaft scarification
or production of many scars. The effect is that of ridges (not unlike a
ribbed condom) or numerous raised bumps. Naturally men are often reluctant
to undergo such dramatic modificaton and pain on that part of their body.
The results are not always predictable and cannot appear unpleasant. Here
if anywhere in body modification a very skilled professional is worth their
fee.
In ancient
times men often had their foreskins pierced for religious and decoration
reasons. As we learn in the Kama Sutra such men might insert "any
imaginable object....long or round, of gold, wood, terracotta, stone, etc.".
Both hard and flexible objects including those resembling an elephant's
trunk, flower bud, curved stick, horn, or bracelet were employed. The objects
were usually covered in leather and oiled to avoid injuring the vagina
walls.
In our modern
plastic surgery culture penal modificatons are more safe and common place.
Imbedded objects
are placed under the shaft skin or into the glans. Various surgically sterile
objects including BB's, plastic ridges, and stars are routinely placed
just under the skin of the shaft, sometimes forming a pattern. The head
or glans may also be surgically altered for sexual stimulation, particularly
in making it more rough or wide.
Some speak
of the designer penis
being affordable to everyone in the near future - if not entirely newly
shaped designer sex organs
containing whatever nerves we happied to be born with. That brings the
idea of sexual variety to some very new if not frightening places. There
is likely to be an emphasis on widening or increasing the girth of the
penis since some women feel that is more important than length. |
RITUAL
TRANSVESTITISM IN RELIGION |
It
takes little imagination to see an accepted, even manditory form transvestitism
in the lacy, ornate, silken vestments of some modern priests. Indeed the
association of homosexual practice with the Catholic priesthood has only
expanded such perceptions.
Even in protestant
demoninations some say the modern choir robe too is a transvite display
- given the satiny look, ornate collars, ddress-like style. Others argue
to opposite saying that mixed gender choirs are in fact attempts at androgyny
or at least obscuring sexual indentity that may distract from worship.
It has not escaped some parents that lacy garb of some boy choirs is a
bit too effeminate for their modern sensability.
Many strict
churches ban or discourage the wearing of pants suits among females citing
biblical admonitions about dressing as males. Others have come to understand
the greater modesty in pants (particularly on stairs!) even compared to
longish dresses. One sociologist has said that "all women are transvestites",
citing the popularity of blue jeans cut for a man's form and a fly clearly
not designed for their anatomy. Many women wear their husband's shirts
but few men could get away with wearing their wive's blouse! If true, what
does this say about your next church picnic or social where jeans are everywhere?
Nor is it uncommon to see some orders of nuns in pantsuits with zippered
flies and padded shoulders which mimic male shoulders. Indeed one is often
hard-pressed to find a nun nearly so feminine as her priest! |
ORIGINS
OF PRIMATIVE SEX EDUCATION |
Antropologists
and sociologists state that many cultures have no concept of the sex
talk and certainly no school classes on sex.
In many societies the idea of internal doors, locks, and separate bedrooms
is non-existant even if they could be afforded. While parents and relatives
may exhibit modesty in sexual performance (ie. quietness, thick blankets,
small curtains), most of world's children have and do learn from observation.
In some cultures children often "hump" and make noise, imitating their
relatives without any knowledge that genitals are involved in the process!
Children
at play in nature also learn from seeing animal intercourse. One sees reports
of how boys may develop bad habits this way, having only observed the less
than tender approach of beasts and violent rape. Some experts say that
children need to observe romance between mates more than demonstrations
of the actual mechanics. In other words, true lovemaking is more difficult
to learn than simple sex. In villages they may learn from observing pets
and domesticated livestock - as many in modern times learn growing up on
a farm.
Children
of course also learn sex (right and wrong) from talking with those of their
own age, particularly siblings. Kids often repeat dirty jokes and stories
without knowing their full meaning. Often an older child has some handed
down knowledge or found a Playboy in the attic. A child today who can read
the internet or has a school health class is likely to pass down some of
this knowledge to younger siblings. They gain some social status and prestige
by sharing this knowledge. There are often big gaps in this knowledge and
sometimes controdictory ideas.
Children
have and always will learn sex by experimentation with their own bodies
and others. Mild masturbation is observed in very young infants. It varies
widely with cultures how if at all masturbation and "playing doctor" are
tolerated. Some permit one but punish the other. In some cultures parents
make a pretense at discouraging these practices but do not actively discourage
them. Others hear from a parent or religious leader the penalties (moral
and physical) of touching or being touched. Most societies have laws against
rape at all ages. In the Trobriand Islands, parts of Africa, and New Guinea,
western anthropologists have been startled to see children allowed to perform
various sex acts in public - all without much parental concern. One missionary
reported that they observed children performing intercourse while watching
village dogs do the same - all while trying to raise their own children
to a very different standard! More than playing doctor kids in these societies
"play house" in every intimate detail. On the Trobriant Islands researchers
observed children in sex-induced, trance-like states just as their elders
have in ritual sex. |
POSITION:
"Bi Daisy
Chain" |
The
daisy chain is a sexual position that usually
involves ten or more people in very free group sex. Each person connected
to the next by their genitals or mouth, forming a linear chain of bodies.
There may be intercourse but most of the links involve oral sex. There
are certainly gay versions with penis in anus as well. Some were oral with
tongue to genitals, regardless of the gender of each part. Many were of
course little more than a slightly organized orgy with any combination
of organ-tongue-vagina-anus enjoyed in full. The variations are of course
endless and you need a supercomputer to compute what a group of 50 people
might possibly do in a single chain.
The origin
of the term is unclear and there are several theories. The word "daisy"
was a widespread term for peace and love in the 60's and the daisy chain
may simple represent a ring or chain of those emotions. It was part of
a "love in for peace" or some similiar sentiment. Some say that most daisy
chains were in fact rings or circles. All the legs and bodies were a bit
like petals on the daisy.
The Bi
Daisy Chain is one that accomodates both sexes
and every possible sexual preference. Connections involve penis, vagina,
tongue, anus, fingers, nipple, clitoris, toes, dildo, vibrator, vegetable,
and other objects in any combination. A man may "toe" a girl as easily
as another man. Likewise a woman may insert a cucumber into a man's anus
as readily as another male. Two girls may be linked by a double dildo in
their vaginas and so may two men by their anus. Indeed girls may connect
by dildoes to both their vaginas and anus in one more advanced, difficult
position. Still everyone is connected to the person behind and ahead in
some enjoyable way.
The more
devoted daisy chain set will want us to acknowledge the branched
chain while might just happen or be planned.
Two persons may link or connect to another and behind them form another
chain. We've heard of cases where this complex human formation of love
and pleasure has spelled out alphabetical letters that are photographed
for good purpose.
We have even
heard of a group position that is hardly a chain but based on a similar
concept. One girl is fingered by two fingers from each of two girls (four
fingers in total). Those girls are in turn fingered by two fingers from
each of two girls and so on. It is something of a fingering
pyramid that sounds quite pleasant and rather
organized that the same time. It is very interesting and likely pleasant
variation on the lesbian orgy. |
LACTATION
FETISH |
More
men that usually admit it have a fascination with female lactation or production
of milk from the breasts. There are magazines, videos, websites, chat rooms,
and club shows devoted to what is called a fetish. These "milk maids" are
usually young and large-breasted. In fact some strip clubs pay top dollar
to lactating women who become performers. One bar we heard about had the
performer squirt milk down to men in the front row who caught drops in
their mouths, sometimes in exchange for dollar bills.
Firstly,
Freud would tell us because it reminds us of mother's comfort and our earliest,
most secure bond - and is a desired experience particularly as few men
can consciously remember it. Others suggest that nursing is really our
first sexual experience. Returning to it is nostalgic or at least comforting.
Whether the fetish is really oedipal or just a celebration of femaleness
one could argue for years. Secondly, it is a sex differentiator and we
tend to enjoy displays of things that make us different, male from female.
Thirdly, lactation as popularly performed is analogous to male ejaculation.
It carries some of the same energy such as climatic applause, desire for
consumption, precious life-giving substance, and forbidden public display
in some cultures.
Fourthly,
it is often part of a lesbian show, where one woman nurses from another
before other acts. One expert described it as a "legitimatizaton of the
lesbian taboo" as one based on a accepted form of one woman touching another
(ie. mother with young daughter). It may offer some deviant men a legal
pedophilic or incest fantasy due to the sex acts that follow lactation
(ie. mommy with son fantasy). Fifthly, it simply has a novelty or shock
value one that club owners and media types use for maximum profit. It differentiates
one dancer from another, one club from another. Lastly, some experts note
that many husbands feel excluded from the mother-child bond in their own
marriage. They may seek a sexualization of nursing (in a way their wife
does not accept) in an attempt to reconnect with their sexual past. Indeed
most women deny their husbands "a taste", creating a stronger taboo still.
And we all know that most any taboo is likely to have appeal in sexual
presentation. |
TRIBADISM |
Tribadism
is the rubbing of body parts together for sexual gratification. The term
is almost always applied to lesbian or female-female contacts and implies
full or partial nudity. Humping
or dry sex may
include tribadism but the term usually implies people rubbing each other
with clothes on - for example, teens in the back seat of a car.
Typically,
lesbian tribadism
includes four basic practices:
-
Rubbing leg
against crotch or vulva. Variation A has both partners active while Variation
B has one passive.
-
Rubbing crotches
or vulvas together such as in the so-called double
scissors where bodies are interlocked. Variaton
A has both active while Variation B shows only one active.
-
Rubbing breasts
and/or nipples against the vulva or clitoris. At least one author has used
the phrase nipple fuck
where an erect, hard nipple is used to stimulate a similarly aroused clitoris.
-
Rubbing breasts
together with produce sensation. Often one partner will finger the crotch
of the other. Mutual back-rubbing is common. One OLCC Praisex ritual involving
celebration of breasts includes women rubbing breast to breast to celebration
their beauty and femaleness.
Among lesbians
tribadic activity is often a form of bonding, female part to female part,
prior to cunnilingus or use of vibrators. Tribadism may be part of foreplay
but some women can climax after even short periods of such touching. Some
polyamorous groups of lesbians practice group
tribadism (forming a group bond with manner
women) before settling down with one or two lovers. This has been called
group foreplay
where everyone helps warm up everyone else. Two women rub the other then
move on to greet and pleasure another lady. |
FELLATIO
VS. IRRUMATIO |
While most
people know that fellatio is oral stimulation of the penis, not everyone
knows oral sex on a male has two named forms. Fellatio implies the performer
is active, moving their mouth, lips, and hands on a generally passive male
organ. Irrumatio
is the opposite where the owner of the mouth is passive and the male forces
his penis into the orifice. Irrumatio may be termed mouth
fucking where the mouth takes on the role
of vagina or anus. Obviously many acts combine both and even alternate
between the two, the partners exchanging the active and passive roles over
a period of time. Indeed such shared dominance is a delightful part of
sexual play. The practice of deep throating
(made famous by at least one movie) is more on the irrumatio side when
the recipient is doing the thrusting. |
THE
CLITORIS-PENIS ANALOGUE |
In
the fetus the male penis and female clitoris develop from the same tissue
known as genital tubercle.
In older medical literature this structure was sometimes known as a "primative
phallus" reflecting a male-centered view of anatomy. Females, some said
"failed to develop" due to a "lack" of testosterone. We now know that both
sexes develop very differently and we now appreciate the clitoris as just
as potent a sexual organ as the penis. Size doesn't matter.
Both structures
have a head or glans
which is the most sensitive to stimulation (especially the oral kind),
easily capable of producing orgasm. Both structures also have a shaft containing
cavernous bodies (corpora cavernosa)
which engorge, inflate, and fill with blood when stimulated.
Clearly men have many more such caverns than women. Yes, women also have
horny erections as any cunnophile
(lover of cunnilingus and the vulva) will tell you.
These similarities
encouraged researchers to try Viagra on women and some women in fact went
about with their own informative experiments! To date Viagra does not work
on the majority of women but could have value for the small number with
engorgement problems - similar to male impotence. But clearly there is
something in the vascular, chemical, and nervous systems (if not the mind)
that is different.
Both organs
also have a protective foreskin. In women it may be called clitoral
hood or "clitorial foreskin". Some forms of
female circumcision (clitidotomy)
remove just the hood (as with males) whiles other remove the entire glans
as well (clitorectomy).
In women the hood or foreskin is formed from the labia
minora or smaller lips. Had the old medical
books been written by women the male foreskin might have been termed the
male labia!
Women with
higher levels of male hormone (by genetics or injection) may develop clitoromegaly
or atypical enlargement of the clitoris. Individuals with very long (ie.
2-3 inch) clitori are known and are even the subject of some adult films.
There is no known correlation between hormone level and clitoris size with
sexual preference, though some fetish lesbian films seem to venerate this
feature - just as other films focus on the large penis. In such films one
may observe cunnilingus performed on women whose clitoral anatomy is elongated,
extremely rigid, and naturally projecting well outside the hood. Such unusual
clitori snap back to a central vertical position when tongued, showing
the rigidity of the shaft. This interests some men but disturbs others.
The analogy
of the two organs obviously diverges in several areas. Males urinate from
the penis while the female urinates from an entirely different structure
below the clitoris. Males ejaculate through the penis while female ejaculate
comes from below the clitoris (Skene's glands)
if at all. Females do not always rely on the clitoris for organsm (having
a G-spot and other vaginal sensors) while males are almost always reliant
on stimulation of glans penis
to attain that state. The enlarged glans of the penis (by size, shape,
and texture) serves for physical stimulation of the vagina while the clitoris
has no such role in stimulating the male. (Lesbians and some heterosexuals
however have discovered techniques that use the clitoris to stimulate their
partners). Traditionally the visual stimulation of the erect penis (or
its hardness through clothes) has been a obvious stimulant to the partner's
mind and body - part of the mental arousal and fantasy if nothing else.
The female arousal is not as obvious unless one is performing oral sex
- which historically men have not always ddone. Indeed in some cultures
it is forbidden so men were entirely ignorant of the clitoral status of
their mate. Those who are aware of their female partner's state of arousal
may receive equal pleasure from the appearance and firmness of her clitoris.
We must also point out that males derive much of their sexual identity
from their penis while most young women are more centered on their vagina
and breasts. Indeed many girls do not even know they have such an organ
(except through masturbatory sensation) until later in life - boys have
no such avoidance of anatomical fact!
Some women
(not just feminists) rebel at the idea of the clitoris as an "underdeveloped
penis" and reject moststructural analogies that medical science and solid
biology have confirmed. There are certainly separate terms (ie. hood vs.
foreskin) if one is inclined to make clear terminological distinctions.
Considering that males have undeveloped nipples and mammaries, it is certainly
no shameful thing that the clitoris does not elongate or develop all the
functions of the male. Indeed, transexual men who receive female hormone
injections often see their penis diminishing in all dimensions.
The clitoris
is obviously a very perfect, functional, and complete organ as is the penis.
Some persons of bisexual persuasion suggest the anatomical analogue is
good reason that "love making" should not depend on the outward formation
of one's particular genitals. |
POSITIONS:
"Triple
Bi" |
In
this position a man has intercourse with a woman in the missionary position.
The man in turn is penetrated in the anus by another man who sits behind
and above him. The two thrusts are coordinated for a pleasant and compatible
rhythm. This is Variation A.
In Variation
B the man fellates the other male (while he penetrates the female or in
alternating acts) in place of anal coitus. In Variation C the first man
is anally penetrated with a dildo or vibrator by the second man. This variation
may preceed the Variation A. In Variation D the woman receives anal rather
than vaginal intercourse. The variations may also be combined. |
FELLATIO
TECHNIQUES |
Fellatio,
the oral stimulation of the penis is not as simple a thing as sometimes
supposed. There are great many techniques and variations of techniques
recorded since ancient times. A summary of these techniques follows:
1. Circling
the head (glans) with the tongue, mainly alone the basal ridges.
2. Licking
up and down the shaft. This has been termed texturing
where one follows the texture of the shaft like riding over topography.
3. Grasping
the shaft firmly with one hand and sucking the head only in the center
of the mouth.
4. Swallowing
only the head and licking it diversely with the tongue inside the mouth.
The tongue, teeth, and cheeks combine for perfect stimulation.
5. Kissing
and nimbling the sides of the shaft. More on erotic
biting and kissing appears in a following
section.
6. Swalling
the entire head and shaft (deep-throating
or devouring).
In Variation 6A it is done slowly with the penis remaining in the throat.
Variation 6B is irrumatio
where the penis is active the throat passive (ie. fucking the mouth). Variation
6C is a rapid in and out of the organ.
7. Licking
only the very tip, opening or meatus.
Sometimes the tip of the tongue may penetrate partly into the meatus. The
rest of the penis is untouched.
8. Kissing,
pinching, and sucking the skin of the shaft where it is most loose. The
skin may be pulled and tugged in a playful and pleasant manner.
9. Sucking
most of penis along the cheeks and back teeth. Persons with pierced cheeks
often use studs for this effect whether or not the tongue is pierced.
10. Ringing
the shaft up and down with an encircled finger(s), kissing and licking
the head. This brings more blood flow up into the shaft and glans. The
fingers may be lubricated.
11. Swallowing
much of the penis, humming or making other throat vibrations to stimulate
it. (hum job)
12. Pentrating
the opening or meatus with object from piercing such as from a pierced
tongue. This must be done with some care to avoid injury and infection.
In more advanced B&D culture catheters and other medical devices are
used.
13. Moving
the penis from side to side over the cheeks, lips, and tongue protruding
from the mouth. A rough beard or piercing may intensify the sensation.
14. Lick
intensely only the base of head in the cleft. Many men are more sensitive
in most areas than anywhere else. Circumcised men sometimes wrap their
penis in plastic wrap to moisten it and increase the sensitivity (as would
a foreskin) prior to this exercise. Indeed any of these techniques may
be more effective after wrapping for a hour or more.
15. Penetrating
the enclosed, intact foreskin with the tongue as if pealing it. Sometimes
the foreskin cavity is filled with fruit juice or flavored oils. There
is one fetish group who uses flavored alcoholic drinks and consumes them
is this imaginative way. Each man in the room has a different recipe! Artificial
foreskins made of plastic wrap or even food materials can be used for circumcised
men.
16. Rubbing
a rough or ribbed object along the shaft while sucking the head. The bristles
of a hairbrush can be effective. This may be part of genital
shaving where a straight razor is used for
mental and physical stimulation.
17. Rubbing
a soft object along the shaft while sucking the head. For example velvet,
a feather, fur, or silk may be used to produce pleasant stimulations to
accompany licking and sucking. We have even seen cases of individuals used
inflated bags of air or "bubble wrap" to produce, unique stimulations.
Sometimes this practice includes blindfolding with the recipient constantly
surprised by the variety of objects.
18. Moving
a vibrator or massager along the shaft and head while licking also. Some
heterosexual men are adverse to something resembling another penis touching
them. For this reason their mates may prefer a more generic massaging device
with a less phallic appearance. In a following section data on vibrator
use on the penis is described.
19. Using
the teeth to lightly bite and tease the shaft and head. The teeth may lightly
comb the shaft in deep swallowng.
20. Using
food or candy in the mouth to stimulate the head when sucked. There is
something called a Jello Job
for those so inclined to experiment. Sometimes strong candy like mints
are used to stimulate the penis with the potent oils. There was something
of a trend using the powerful candy Altoids among prostitutes in several
cities. We understand cough drops have been used this way for centuries.
21. Using
ice in the mouth
to stimulate the head when sucked. This can both intensify the erection
and also shrink it down. Men respond very differently. Ice often as positive,
recharging effect on the testicles which may be overheated during intercourse.
22. Firmly
clamping the base of the shaft with with finger or cock
ring to force blood to remain in the shaft
and to increase turgidity of the head. This is also called the
drum where the skin and glans are tightened
like the musical instrument by forcing up blood into the organ. This can
be painful (similar to the involuntary priapism) but when done carefully
and occasionally can be very enjoyable. The pressure should not be maintained
for an extended of period of time.
23. Gumming
the head with a partner who has removed dentures or partials, thus producing
a surface of the gums for stimulation. This is sometimes part of a senior
sex fetish or gerontophilia
culture.
24. Licking
the shaft while the head is penetrating a vagina or anus. This is sometimes
called an assist.
25. Lightly
whipping the
shaft while sucking the head. This combines light pain with intense pleasure
to counteract it. Leather strips and miniature whips are available from
speciality suppliers. The psychology of a woman whipping a penis is certainly
an interesting one.
26. Licking
the penis covered with flavored oils
or lubricants, alternating fellatio with intense finger massages. For example
one must rapidly lick the meatus then rapidly rub it with the index finger,
repeating the process. One may vigorous massage the shaft with two fingers
while encirlcing the head with the tongue. Certain combinations of licking
and finger massages work best for certain men.
27. Encircling
the shaft tightly with ribbon or string,
licking most intensely the bulging portions. This does not necessarily
involve any pain but if there is sucking the head will alleviate it. We
have seen men who enjoyed being "laced up" with dental floss or show strings.
Sometimes the erect penis may be lightly tied down to an object as a curious
variation on the bondage theme. An erection may also be tied flat to the
man's abdomen, requiring the lover to liberate it.
28. Literally
blowing forcefully over the head and shaft, both expelling air and sucking
it past the organ. This is Variation 28A. This is the origin of the word
blowjob which
is has become to mean sucking more than anything else. Cortesans were once
known for their intense sucking ability made possible by full control of
breath. The rushing of air around the penis added much to process. A practice
call Hoovering
(practiceed on both men and women) is Variation 28B. It involves very rapid
movement of air INTO the lungs with the tongue and cheeks that produces
a slurping sound.
29. Also
interesting is forceful spitting on the organ. There are men who simply
driven made by the raw energy of it all as well as delicate sense of saliva
running down the shaft. Sometimes saliva may be dripped down the penis
by use of the tongue's tip to carefully guide the flow and also provide
a small massage. Spitting on a "subject" is sometimes part of S&M culture.
30. Related
to the above is use of a water spray such as faucet, small hose, or vibrating
shower nozzle in addition to sucking the head. The shower is obviously
a good place to try this out. Sometimes hot tub jets can be directed for
perfect water-assisted blowjob. The balls and anus may also get a good
watering too. A natural waterfall is even better! Boys sometimes have an
early sexual arousal from yard sprinklers or in the bath, allowing grown
men to enjoy something of a nostalgic experience.
31. There
is also the famous glory hole
means of fellatio popularized by gay culture in men's rooms. A hole in
a partition is large enough to allow the penis and testicles to pass through.
There is sometimes the thrill of a mysterious stranger or anonymous lover
on the other side. The glory hole is also part of heterosexual culture
in some red light districts - we know at least in some Asian countries.
A man pays his money, sticks it through and some woman pleasures him. The
"wall of holes" may have many women behind it, some perhaps not so young
and presentable. There is also the possibility of a man or transvestite
getting in on the action, adding still more intrique for some. In one game
the women changed organs ever few minutes on some musical cue. This is
a true fellatio technique since the structure of the hole has a unique
means of stimulation on the testicles and organ. Together with the stimulation
of the mind it makes for a unique experience.
32. One
technique encountered in group sex we might call shared
fellatio. One lovers sucks half the head joined
by the other lover on the other side. Their tongues may join to intensely
massage the meatus or opening. They two fellators may link lips
in the exercise and might kiss throughout. They may lick the shaft up and
down in some coordinated pattern. Each one may massage the testicle on
their side. Someone has described this as "French kissing with a happy
penis in the middle".
33. The
abdomen rub involves
involves sucking or licking the penis while rubbing it along the belly.
The stomach may be lubricated with oil or saliva to improve the results.
This works best with a very stiff, engorged organ. If a man has a hairy
body the stimulation can be more intense.
34. The
hard pull is
where one gently used the mouth and perhaps teeth to pull the penis. A
hand may assist as well. This is a common technique at the beginning of
arousal to stimulate blood to flow into the caverns. It can also be used
on the erect penis to elongate it or add a pleasant stretching sensation.
Nows there's
one technique for every day of the month! Start your calenders now...
The variations
are endless and one is most accomplished when able to use many of these
techniques in one love session. There is also great pleasure in two lovers
performing one technique on the shaft while another concentrates on the
head and meatus. Many of these techniques are more pleasant when the testicles
and anus are also stimulated. |
EPICUREAN
SEX |
When
you mention Epicurean sex
to most people they figure it might involve something kinky with food or
even a form of hedonism. It is neither. Epicurus was a Greek philosopher
who believed in pleasure in it's highest, more pure, sometimes most simple
form. He cultivated a way of living that involved peace of mind, cultivation
of friendship, leisure, and gentle appreciation of subtle experiences.
That did involve good eating, drinking, conversation, philosophizing, love
of nature, and of course great sex.
We'll confine
our definition of Epicurean sex to the one beautifully articulated by Thomas
Moore in The Soul of Sex. Here Moore presents a way of viewing sexuality
that gratifies the mind and soul as much as the body - and perhaps even
more the former than the later. This is what Edgar Wind called a "noble
passion", one that is meaningful rather than crude, violent, or compulsive.
In some sense Epicurean Sex is the middle ground between stern Puritanism
on one side and wild Hedonism on the other. There is an emphasis on restraint
but also an appreciation of pleasure for what it is and its very necessity
in daily life.
Moore states
that Epicurean sex "consists of sheer sensual delight in the touches, smells,
sights, and sounds of bodies pleasuring each other, accompanied by feelings
of love, emotional peace, and deep friendship". Key to understanding this
way of thinking is the link between friendship and sex. That is different
than romance and sex. It is also very different than narcissism and sex.
Friendship is the requirement. Not all married people are friends nor are
all unmarried lovers. Epicurean sex involves cultivation of a friendship
of the mind and soul before one of the body can develop. It is about being
friends first and lovers second - not the other way around as many do in
dating today. It also makes us less vulnerable to sways of romantic emotion
which can rise and fall at any time. Moore says this attitude will "give
foreplay reason and purpose, and keep a glow in the slow decay of orgasm".
Epicurean
sex is just one part of a rich, sensual life. It means enjoying all God
has given us. And because we seek to cultivate friendships and community
we are very willing to share in our resources and love. The modern Epicurean
is often viewed as some rich, elite gourmet snob who seeks only to exclude
others and please self. In truth Epicurus had a very generous, inclusive
view of life. Sex is just one of many pleasures we may share with friends.
Because of friendships are based on more than lust and romantic love they
are apt to endure.
Epicurean
sex also seeks a balance of lust and affection. One without the other makes
one prone to numerous problems and disappointments. Moore notes that "lust
may have a place and yet at the same time be influenced by the fundamental
values of friendship and tranquillity".
Critics of
Epicurus would suggest that pleasure being its own justification allows
one to abandon morality of a civilized society. Yet when one holds the
pursuit of pleasure to the highest standard of friendship one would not
wish to act unfriendly to another or society at large. Thus abusive and
illegal sex has no place even though one is greatly devoted to the sensual
arts. While an epicurean may delight in good wines he would not drive drunk
as that would ruin another's pleasure and be quite unfriendly. Pleasure
is thus bounded by good friendship to all parties in the community. Pleasure
is not absolute but is limited by common sense and a lack of selfishness.
There is
perhaps no better expression of Epicurean sexuality than to assemble with
true friends in a lovely private garden, dining on good foods, wine, and
enjoying lively and intellectual conversations. There may also be music
and singing. Every good comfort is provided for. Sex will invariably arise
from the pursuit of pleasure as the highest good. |
BRACHIOPROTIC
INTERCOURSE
0R
FISTING |
Brachioprotic
intercourse involves use of the hands in sexual activity. It applies to
both vaginal and anal intercourse.
Vaginal "fisting",
also known as braciovaginal eroticism (BVE)
often springs from "fingering" or "female digitation" as we discussed above.
In general, brachioprotic sex involves insertion of all the knuckles rather
than just the digits or fingers. As the opening relaxes the entire hand
may enter. The G-spot and other sensory nerves may be targeted by those
informed on such matters or just by accident. Clearly the vaginal canal
is equipt to expand for the birth of children with bodies much wider than
the human hand. However for many young women the practice can be very painful
as is delivery. For others it is a very powerful, highly intimate practice.
Some report it is "like the adult way of playing doctor [OB-GYN]". The
practice does have some risk such as tearing of the vaginal wall and introduction
of microbes on the entire hand. Antibacterial soap or use of gloves with
lubricant may be desirable.
Anal bracioprotic
sex or "anal fisting" is usually associated
with the gay male community. It is even considered a rite of passage by
some gay clubs. Sometimes the practice follows analingus and penetration
of the rectum with objects including dildos and penis. Individuals may
even be prepared by a succession of objects including greased baseball
bats (both ends) and very large dildos until a fist may be inserted with
more ease. As with vaginal fisting, there is potential for tearing the
interior wall and making one more vulnerable to infection including HIV.
Some groups have banned the practice while others use gloved hands and
medicinal lubes. We are aware of one group that uses bracioprotic insertion
to give males some appreciation of the whole body, invasive, and painful
experience their female mates experience in childbirth. |
DEFLORATION |
Defloration
or "deflowering" a female is usually defined as removal of the hymen, the
thin membrane that usually protects the young vagina. In popular terms
it is called "popping her cherry" or some crude joke about a guy named
"Buster Hymen". This must not be confused with analogies of the vulva to
a pink flower or orchid which obviously remains in tact except in some
instances of female circumcision.
Not all women
can be deflowered since some women are not born with hymens. Those which
are have several types or forms including some which are small and less
easily to detect. The natural shapes and perforations vary considerably.
Defloration
is not the same as "lose of virginity" since some women don't have a hymen
at birth or lose them from sports activity, exercise, tampon insertion,
digital masturbation, or a gynocological exam. Some of the arguments against
women in sports or the military derive from an unstated appreciation that
hymens just might become undun. In some cultures women were denied valuable
gynocological services for fear of damage to the hymen. Obviously some
taboos against masturbation relate to preservation of the hymen. There
has been a minority advocacy for the "pad" over the tampon for this very
reason - indeed some groups suggest the tampon to be a modern "sexual device"
(even a "mock penis") to corrupt their girls. Tampons and other inserted
devices such as birth control are prohibited in some cultures even by local
law.
In ancient
times (as the Bible records) a man might divorce a girl without the "signs"
or "proofs" of her virginity. It was not uncommon for a tribal leader or
female authority to examine the girl prior to the ceremony. In some cases
the hymen was even taken and preserved on a cloth prior to intercourse
during the honeymoon. This way a kind of certificate
of virginity using physical evidence just
as a blood test might qualify a couple today for a marriage license.
Sometimes
women are only expected to bleed as part of nuptial
defloration. Thus a non-virgin might conceal
a small container of blood on her wedding night, depositing it to make
all the expected signs on the cloth of evidence or on the sheets. In some
cultures a man who makes his virginal bride bleed is bragged about and
considered a very powerful, effective man. Thus a bride could simultaneously
flatter her man and maintain her cover by fraud. Sometimes girls and their
families conspired in this manner, especially when an inheritance or dowry
was involved. Of course many virgin girls without a hyman or just a small
one who did not happen to bleed might be wrongly accused as well.
Repair or
reconstruction of the hymen by surgery (to "restore" virginity) has been
practiced in Japan, India, and the Middle East.
In the Middle
Ages, it was sometimes the right of the prince or tribal leader to deflower
a bride prior to her marriage. Whether he had any sexual intercourse with
her was a matter of custom but not always if we can believe the records.
Obviously these leaders have some sexual thrill and power trip either way.
In some cultures (ancient India for one) a pretty girl was expected to
serve time in the ruler's harem prior to becoming marriageable. Thus defloration
and sex education were integrated into one experience. The girl would also
be instructed by older women in the harem. This was almost a form of taxation
or tribute fathers offered to the ruler of their region.
In other
cultures it was the right of the girl's father or an elder women to do
the act. Such practices were considered sacred even though molestation
of children might be punishable by death. In many cultures a priest would
do the defloration - symbolizing how much sexuality and religion have been
intertwined. Indonesian girls at one time were deflowered at birth just
a Western cultures perform a male circumcision. In India there was even
a custom for young girls to squat on a lingam
or erect stone tongue or penis - that object being a symbol of the Shiva,
god of sexuality and feritility. (Here if anywhere we see that one culture's
religion is another's idea of child abuse and 20 years in jail). Many cultures,
especially in Africa, regarded defloration a sacred rite to be performed
by elder females, a female relative, or tribal leader.
According
to Georg Feuerstein in Sacred Sexuality: Living the Vision of the Erotic
Spirit (Tarcher, Los Angeles, 1992) the Babylonians expected women
to sacrifice their virginity at the temples. Feuerstein states it was not
considered a shame but rather "it was a matter of honor". The ancient god
Baal, known from many Biblical references, was a phallic god. He was known
for deflowering virgins. It likely was performed using idols or statues
in the manner of the India Shiva objects. |
BIPHOBIA |
Most people
have heard of homophobia
which the Oxford Dictionary of Current English defines as "hatred
or fear of homosexuals". More recently the term heterophobia
has been used to denote the attitude of some homosexual groups on the opposite
extreme. Biphobia
is along a similar theme but Kathleen Bennett has defined it more broadly
as "denigration of bisexuality as a valid life choice".
The first
tenant of biphobia seems to be a total denial that true bisexuality even
exists. Heterosexuals and homosexuals alike may declare that self-defined
bisexual people are in fact really gay but too timid to say so. In this
respect biphobia seems equally prevalent among both the straight and gay
communities.
Another approach
involved in biphobia that it is just a phase. The individual some say has
yet to decide whether to be hetero or homo in orientation. This is sometimes
termed the indecision theory of bisexuality.
The noted psychologist Stekel stated that "all persons originally are bisexual
in their predisposition. There is no exception to this rule. Normal persons
show a distinct bisexual period up to the age of puberty". Thus some persons
believe the mature, adult bisexual simply failed to develop or form a complete
orientation. As one wise person said "do you want chocolate or vanilla
ice cream for the rest of your life? You have to decide now. You can never
have both". That of course makes no sense. While sexual preference is more
complex that picking flavors the analogy holds up well. Some people may
want chocolate 9 times out of 10 but occasionally enjoy the change of pace
with vanilla. Others may go with vanilla 7 out of 10 times. Still others
enjoy both with equal frequency. Some may grow tired of one and take up
the other, reversing the course some time later.
The major
basis of biphobia in recent decades springs from an idea that bisexuals
are more likely than others to spread AIDS, particularly among heterosexuals.
While gay men, hemophiliacs, heroine users, and even Haitians have all
been feared, many heterosexual people consider themselves isolated from
such alledged sources of the virus. But what if her new boyfriend is secretly
bi and meets men late at night ? What if his new girl has lesbian lovers
without safe sex? Together with the myth that all bisexual people are promiscuous
such fears were magnified in some minds. Therefore admitting one is bi
in some societies is worse than coming out as gay or lesbian.
Some believe
a self-confessed bisexual will "jump on anything that moves". People often
feel more comfortable around people who have no possible sexual interest
in them. For example, women often seek out the company of gay men who are
considered "safe friends" compared to other men. But for an "out" bisexual
person no one around them is going to feel absolutely out of the range
of sexual conquest. Some bi women find themselves losing their female friends
with whom they have had friendships for years. A bi man in a mainly heterosexual
lockeroom is likely to feel the same stigma that a gay man would feel -
except the men might suspect he will ALSO be interested in their wife or
girlfriend! It is hard for a bi person to communicate just who is "their
type" when two genders are involved - further complicating people's perceptions
of interaction on a sexual level.
Another component
of popular biphobia is fear that a long-term spouse will come out as bisexual
later in a marriage. Lots of husbands and wives have. Still more want to.
Usually their spouses suspect a bisexual propensity and have some basis
for the biphobia. Sometimes they know their mate has a bi past and have
doubts about a conversion to monogamy. We heard of one lady who kept buying
her husband the latest exercise machines for their home out of fear he
was spending too much time at a local gym. More than one man has had his
wife investigated for possible daytime adultery only to find her spending
her time in the bed of another woman. |
VIDEO
+ VIBE
FOR MALE
AROUSAL |
Rowland,
Cooper et. al. in the Journal of Sex Research 34(2): 161-166 found that
use of vibrators improved the state of arousal of men. All the subjects
watched erotic videos. A small vibrotactile
device was attached posterior to the glans
to one group of men. Vibration was intermittant rather than continuous.
The other group had only the videos for stimulation. This scientific, laboratory
study showed that men with video only increased their penis circumference
an average of 14.7mm (premature ejaculators) and 21.1mm (control group).
But the men who had the vibrator with the video increased their size an
average of 22.0mm (premature ejaculators) and 23.5mm (control). Men who
had problems with premature release also were more vulnerable when the
vibrator was included in their stimulation. The study, like several others,
suggests that men with premature ejaculation are most affected by physical
stimulation as opposed to the mental aspects of arousal. Both groups however
had increased penis size when the vibrators were used. Guys, that means
that the little pocket vibrator isn't just for her anymore. In our very
informal but thorough research we have found the ladies like to use vibrators
on men, particularly those with some aversion to frequent fellatio. |
GENDER
DIFFERENCES IN SEX FANTASY |
There
are quite a few things written about how women and men differ when it comes
to sexual fantasy. Glenn Wilson in his 1987 book Variant Sexuality
presents these interesting numbers. Of the surveyed people, 31% of males
fantasized about group sex while only 15% of females had similar thoughts.
Some 15% of females had fantasies involving romantic or exotic settings
compared to just 4% of males. A fantasy involving forced sex or mock rape
was had by 4% of males but 13% of females. |
PHALLIC
WORSHIP
AND
SYMBOLISM |
Worship
of the phallus or penis has long permeated ancient cultures and is known
in their literature and artwork. In many early cultures there was both
a god and goddess. Phallic worship usually symbolized worship of their
male God.
Worship of
the god and goddess usually involved an appreciation of the magic or mystery
of human anatomy and biology. The female goddess obviously was involved
with the mystery of birth and fertility in general. The male god centered
around the penis. While the penis is the obvious identifier of maleness,
the ancients considered the organ to be under the control of magic. Erections
were often involuntary and not subject to control of the mind. Similarly
the penis could not be induced by any means to become erect after intercourse
- and sometimes before. Just as fertility and birth were not fully in their
control the power and performance of the penis was viewed as a work of
the higher powers.
Ancient Greece
has been described as being under the "reign of the phallus". While other
cultures may have favored the goddess over the god, the Greeks increased
the perception and acceptance of male superiority. While other groups considered
the penis a simple symbol of maleness and sex magic, the Greeks viewed
it more as a sign of power and even violence. Indeed soldiers in some cultures
used the phallic symbol almost as a warning or badge of power - claiming
superiority over their smaller, inferior male rivals and a threat of rape
to the enemy's women and girls. The phallus was worshiped as much for its
value for threat and dominance as its beloved sexual function.
While the
Biblical Hebrews were prohibited from overt phallic worship (such as phallic
god Baal) there is strong phallic symbology in their writings. One became
safe and even santified by grabbing the "horns of the altar". Nave's
Concise Topical Bible confirms that horn symbolized divine protection
and power. While some theologians suggest the horn is purely symbolic of
the power of male animals, animals horns in turn have always been understood
as representative of the penis. Animal horns have always been used in sexual
rituals and as aphrodisiacs. Easton's Bible Dictionary tells us
that horn in the Bible is also symbolic of horror, strength, dominion,
glory, fierceness, and royal dignity.
In the New
Testament we see reference to the "horn of salvation". Luke 1:64 refers
to Christ, the source of this salvation as "raised up a horn". Salvation
like the phallus confers life. Christ spoke of himself as the bridegroom
going into the five ready virgins, a symbol of the church. Thus the horn-phallus-salvation-marriage
theme is all part of one sacred principle.
Psalm 89:
17, 24 speaks of the "exalted horn", a clear reference to an erect phallus.
Zechariah 1:21 and I Samuel 2:1 speak of the horn lifted up or lifted high.
Ezekiel 29:21 even speaks of a horn to grow for Israel. The Book of Revelation
in the Christian Bible has numerous references to emerging horns. These
growing, lifted up, exalted, or sprouting horns are always used to identify
male power, prosperity, and victory. Indeed most of the kings of Israel
were ritually anointed with oil from a horn - likely a variant of the pagan's
anointing with semen used to honor their new leaders or inductees. Like
the Greeks, the Hebrew horn-phallus symbolized power, male dominion, strength
of their leaders, and vitality of their culture. |
THE
ART OF
EROTIC
BITING |
In
modern American culture we are familiar with love
bites characterized by the neck
hickey, a red, discolored spot or bruise resulting
from biting or pinching with the mouth. Among young teens the hickey is
almost a rite of passage, a badge of honor symbolizing sexual maturity
and success at winning a lover. They become a somewhat subtle way of saying
"I got laid last night". Among younger children the hickey is sometimes
given without much sexual involvement as something of a love game from
their earliest attempts at serious kissing. We have heard of cases of older
boys pinching "virginal" girl's necks (creating a false
hickey) to embarrass them before their parents
and other youth. Of course kids (especially boys) quickly discover they
can fabricate their own false hickeys to win admiration or envy of their
peers.
Erotic biting
has long been a part of serious sexuality. The Kama Sutra devotes
an entire chapter to it and like other chapters has a complete taxonomy
of forms and styles. "Local customs should be consulted" since the practice
varied widely. In some cities the practice was offensive (even dangerous)
where in other places it was a honor to one's lover and even expected.
The women of Koshala for example loved violent biting and "dildos are much
employed". The author(s) warned "One should not be led by a state of excitation
into performing acts that are considered unfitting". These practices "if
lightly performed, arouse desire and provoke sighs". Biting and scratching
is observed "in all species" and the main goal is excitation prior to copulation.
In some women this can produce a true orgasm.
All parts
of the body were considered suitable except the upper lip, tongue, and
eyes. The forehead, lower lip, neck, cheeks, chest, breasts, sides, crotch,
ear, feet, armpits and genitals were favored. Attention to specific erotic
zones in the woman was essential. The writer advises that "kiss marks on
the ear, as well as scratch marks on the cheeks are considered ornamental".
These ancient lovers of sex also left fingernail marks in conjunction with
bites.
The major
types of bites are as follows:
-
Discreet:
gentle bite to the lower lip, leaving only short-term redness. Today we
might call this a love nip.
-
Impressed:
firm bite to the lower lip or cheeks, leaving lasting redness.
-
Pointed:
a tiny piece of skin is bitten by the teeth and pulled.
-
Coral Jewel:
a spot is squeezed several times between the top teeth and lower lip, leaving
a dark rose mark in a jewel shape.
-
Necklace of
Gems: coral jewel (larger) marks left in a
line along some part of the body. They were favored along the neck in two
lines, down both sides of the torso, or near the sexual organs.
-
Necklace of
Dots: pointed (smaller) marks left in a line
or two on the body.
-
Scattered Cloud:
small teeth marks arranged in an irregular pattern (ie. cloud shapes) on
the body. Leaving these marks below the breast is mentioned.
-
Chewing the
Wild Boar: Closely spaced bites over a wide
area "forming a red center" below the breasts. Due to the swine association
this term is best avoided in modern times!
THE FOLLOWING
ARE MODERN VARIATIONS NOT FOUND IN THE KAMA SUTRA:
-
Initialing:
bites form the initials of the lover's name. These variations serve as
a type of short duration tattoo and denote a type of "ownership" of the
lover's body.
-
Symbology:
bites form a symbol of a group, gang, or organization. Shape of a heart
is also very common in symbol of general love. We have heard of one fraternity
who bit females from a sister sorority with a Greek letter.
-
Circling: bites
form a circle around an object such as the naval, nipple, tattoo, piercing,
or male glans. The Necklace styles are generally a line rather than a circle
and do not ring a specific landmark on the body.
-
Vampire: two
small bites (perhaps Pointed type) on the neck to resemble the two punctures
of vampire fangs. This was a Halloween pastime among a group of swinging
friends.
The practices
of erotic biting varied in their violence according to the type of lover,
their tradition, and personality. In some cases the Indian man would bite
the woman with a necklace. She would return the favor, giving him a necklace
"as if she were in anger" or "like a madwoman". In some cases the hair
is grabbed and light bondage is involved. For instance "she bites wherever
he had bitten her and rejoices in his efforts to free himself".
Like scratches
these bite marks were considered "a souvenir of sexual relations". They
were also marks of adultery and might serve as legal evidence. Necklaces
were considered proof the woman have consented for an extended period of
a time with her lover. Recent, visible bite marks also told others that
a man or woman had a current lover and might be unavailable. It was also
a sort of advertisement of the lover's erotic skills. If the lover was
known others could admire his or her skill in this important erotic artistry
or lack thereof. This is why some bites were done on visible places (neck,
arms) vs. hidden places (below breasts, pubic area) to be either public
or private knowledge. But in our modern beach culture with skimpy outfits
few such protections are possible. |