Retam Sullet - Part Eleven

Thea's life suddenly began to click into place.

She used every bit of experience and information that seemed applicable to their situation; she utilized every inner resource she could tap. She had never been happier in her life. Or more strenuously tested.

Even the project scientists knew a human infant required a human touch, so twice a day the Crawford clones had massaged the children in their tanks. Thea remembered and carefully rubbed her babies.

In the tank, the electrodes stimulating her developing brain had shown her human faces, words, sights, told her their version of everything she needed to know. She gave a revised edition to her children, even though it was some months before she had definitive proof that they understood her signing.

In the lab, her pleasure centers had been stimulated so that she responded emotionally to dependence and intelligence. Ritchie would not have liked to know that, so she did not tell him. Still, what was charming in the father was equally endearing in the sons. Alert blue eyes and tiny grasping hands were familiarly entrancing to her. The babies had that same wide-eyed look of fascination as Ringo, the same utterly disarmed and disarming dimpled grin, and a very familiar squint-and-flared-nostril combination that occurred roughly five seconds before their faces turned red and their mouths flew wide open. Ritchie called it crying, but the babies never seemed to have any tears. She and Ritchie never let that go on for long anyway. To tell the truth, they seldom set the boys down when they were awake. They responded very positively to being held.

It was harder than anything she had ever done. She knew she had grown weak and complacent in her years with the Gunmen. When she first came Maryland, she was so used to crushing work that she was often forced to do chin-ups on the shower bar until she was anywhere near tired enough for sleep. Takoma Park had been work in other ways. Numbers, which had long been a pleasant distraction from boredom and worry, became, for the first time in her life, a challenge.

Thea realized she had lucked out when she came to the Gunmen's lair. In retrospect, it was good training for motherhood. If it had not been for her time at the paper, she would have been utterly unequipped to deal with her offspring beyond the necessity for nutrition and hygiene.

She looked up from the boys in her arms to the one in Ringo's. Her husband no longer felt like a responsibility to her. His looks still enchanted her, he was still brilliant and kind, but he no longer seemed endearingly frail. Like the first time she'd seen him naked, she was struck by how strong he really was. It was strange to know someone not only cared enough to want to protect her, but could actually pull it off. Ringo felt like a comrade, a partner, another self, now. That didn't mean, of course, that she wouldn't bash-in the skull of anyone who tried to hurt him.

Ritchie was talking to the baby, and as far as she could see, the baby was talking back. The guys laughed at her whenever she suggested that, but it sure looked the same to her. She eyed all three boys appraisingly. A bath and one more feeding and they would go to sleep. Then she and Ritchie could grab some monitor time. Internally, she raised her fist in the air - victory was in sight!

Frohike looked somewhat agitated as he left the mud alcove that housed his monitor.

WHAT'S EATING YOU, SHORTMAN? she asked.

NOTHING BAD, SWEETHEART. I GOT MAIL FROM YOUR MOM AND DAD. THEY'RE COMING FOR CHRISTMAS AND BRINGING YOUR LITTLE BROTHER AND SISTER, he answered.

BROTHER AND SISTER? Thea gaped. I HAVE A BROTHER AND SISTER?

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Frohike sent the first email after Thanksgiving dinner.

Dear Marty,

We love the new place. Remember back when we promised your lovely wife we'd keep an eye out for a muffin like the one she ran into in San Diego several years back? I know we should have told you sooner, but we ran into one that bears a striking resemblance awhile ago. Less frail and a little older, though. This recipe has more in common with the ones she's come up with at home in the past few years. You'll understand that we kept it under our hats until it was kitchen-tested.

We'd love to have you up over winter vacation. Just don't expect me to ski.

Love

Aunt Martha

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The reply came the following Saturday.

Dear Aunt Martha,

Do I seem like the type to make an old woman with a wooden leg risk her life on skis? I am wounded. Laura can't wait to see you all. Of course, we'll be bringing the muffin home with us. Does this recipe travel well? Expect us the 18th. Evening.

Love

Marty

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Frohike answered.

Dear Marty,

We can't wait to see you. As for taking the muffin home, you'll have to talk to your cousin Richard about that. He's developed a fondness. Don't be hasty and plan to bite off more than you can chew.

Love Aunt

Martha

P.S. You said evening - should I hold dinner?

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Mulder still didn't get exactly what it meant. Apparently the Gunmen had located one of Scully's children and Langly didn't want to let go? How wrong did that sound? It didn't make any sense. Well, they'd find out soon enough.

The snow and the moonlight fell gorgeous on the mountains and the clusters of adobe houses. On one side of the highway surged the Rio Grande. On the other side was El Rito, a village with no visible roads, no street signs, and every damn house the same color - mud. The only notable structure around looked like it was probably a Buddhist temple. It was too dark to see the blue house trim Byers had mentioned, too snowy to see much of anything else. There was no choice but to follow the Gunmen's instructions scrupulously. He hated that.

He stopped the car and threw it into reverse. Backwards, on the highway, in the snow, at night, with the kids in the car. Scully give him 'the look.'

The directions seemed pointlessly complicated. He suspected it was one of those Gunmen things that served no function other than to indulge some frustrated 'Mission Impossible' fantasy.

Finally, he gave up. He went back to the last mile highway marker. He zeroed out the odometer. He went 1.73 miles, then made a sharp right. He watched out for the dip. He would have followed the snaking dirt road to the fourth house past the two rusted-out water heaters then gone due north, but the road was completely obscured by snow. He bottomed out in a ditch he hadn't even seen.

Shit.

He saw the water heaters standing against each other like drunken soldiers and managed to squeal his way out of the hole full of snow. He counted four houses, estimated where he would put the road if it was up to him. Counted three houses north.

There it was. Or maybe it wasn't. But he decided to aim for that house none the less.

As he got closer, it seemed more likely to be the right place. It had all the hallmarks he could identify in the dark - adobe, two story, corrugated tin roof. It also seemed to be surrounded by an inordinate amount of stuff, like the owners were holding a snowy midnight yard sale. He began to hum the theme from Sanford and Son.

Whoever lived there was going to get a visit from the Levine family.

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The man who greeted them was a surprise - they just didn't see forty-something white males with shaved heads sporting tattooed sprigs of holly on the side of their pink craniums in Delphi, Alabama. She had been about to apologize for having knocked on the wrong door when she realized she hadn't.

"Agent Scully!" the smiling door-opener greeted her. "I mean, Dr. Levine. Come in."

She blinked up at the blue-eyed man. Kind eyes, pretty eyes, very familiar. OMIGOD - it was John Byers.

She found herself throwing her arms around his neck in delight.

"You can leave your shoes in the foyer," he told her before smiling over her head at Mulder, who had a sleeping child in his arms. "The beds are all upstairs but there's a couch you can put him down on in the living room."

Mulder placed Danny down on the couch and as quickly as possible set back out for the car before he could say much more than hello.

Scully stood stiffly in the living room, uncomfortable after her initial exuberance. It was a large room and seemed to take up the entire main floor. On the far side was an electric range and single deep porcelain sink flanked by long, narrow wooden work tables. Near the center of the room was a huge, obviously home-fabricated wood stove, conical, surrounded by a metal gate on all sides. Small, door-less nooks with tools, workbenches, and computers jutted off the opposite side of the room. Four large afghan-draped couches faced the cooking area.

A young woman sat in a rocking chair close to the fire, a swaddled baby on either shoulder. A third infant cooed on Frohike's lap. Frohike? He looked exactly the same - greyer, balder, but the same.

Mulder huffed in and put Sylvie down beside Frohike on the couch then stood looking around, taking it all in.

Scully blinked. THEA? she signed, incredulous.

The girl nodded excitedly.

Suddenly things began to fall into place.

Mulder touched her arm. "Laura?" There was concern in his voice. "You okay?"

"Oh god, Marty," Scully said quietly. "I know this girl. I met her when I was first pregnant with Danny and you were-, well, she was with Gibson Praise."

She looked at Thea again, then at Sylvie. Thea, she saw in an instant, looked so much like her little girl, almost as if she were an older version of her. YOU'RE MY DAUGHTER? Scully signed.

Thea stood, continuing to rock the babies as she signed. HIS TOO, she pointed at Mulder.

Mulder lifted his brows, but said nothing.

I CAME FROM BOTH OF YOU. It seemed to Scully that Thea was becoming flustered, because the signs began coming quickly and erratically. I MEAN, I CAME FROM ZEUS. THE LABS. I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY. I'M NOT REALLY A MORON. I JUST, I NEVER MET MY PARENTS BEFORE, NOT WHEN I KNEW THEY WERE MY PARENTS, AND I DON'T REMEMBER YOU BEING SO SHORT.

YOU'VE GROWN. Scully smiled, surveying the tall girl before her. Her eyes were filling. WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY ANYTHING WHEN WE MET THE FIRST TIME?

IN ARIZONA? YOU WERE SEARCHING FOR HIM, she gestured at Mulder with her nose, AND I WASN'T SURE. GIBSON DIDN'T TELL ME UNTIL LATER.

Scully nodded. WHERE IS GIBSON? ARE THESE BABIES HIS? Scully asked.

NO. Thea shook her head. GIBSON DIED.

Scully's mouth became a hard line as she tried to puzzle it out. 'Richard has developed a fondness,' Frohike's note had said. Did that mean. . .?

HERE, GRANDMA. Thea offered Scully a baby.

Scully thought about protesting for about a nanosecond. Instead, she gingerly pulled back the little blanket.

Oh, Oh. Her breath came in little bursts. Beautiful. Big blue eyes, head full of feathery white hair, and the sweetest little cleft chin.

Cleft chin?

Oh God.

All the baby needed was a pair of black horn-rimmed glasses and a Megadeth t-shirt.

BOY OR GIRL? she asked Thea.

ALL BOYS. CLONES. I MEAN, IDENTICAL. RITCHIE LIKES IT BETTER IF I SAY IDENTICAL. PEOPLE GET NERVOUS WHEN YOU SAY CLONES.

Mulder's voice came low and perturbed from behind her. "How old is she, Scully?" Realizing his mistake, Mulder immediately signed, THEA, HOW OLD ARE YOU?

HERE, GRANDPA, HOLD A BABY. Thea handed him a warm bundle identical to the one she'd handed Scully a moment before. THIS IS JOEY.

"Lovely," Mulder muttered. "I have a grandson named after a Ramone." HE'S A GOOD LOOKING KID, he signed to Thea with some difficulty. It had been a while since either Scully or Mulder had had to sign while holding fifteen pounds of baby. THEY ALL ARE.

I THINK SO, TOO. Thea beamed. THEY LOOK LIKE THEIR FATHER.

"Yeah, about that-" Mulder took a deep breath and turned to Frohike "-where *is* Langly, anyway?"

"He went to the outhouse 45 minutes ago and hasn't come back." Frohike shook his head as he said it. "The chicken shit."

JOSEPH IS A BEAUTIFUL NAME, Scully said and signed at the same time. She shot Mulder a look meant to suggest he should shut up and do it now. IT WAS MY MATERNAL GRANDFATHER'S NAME.

Thea nodded excitedly. I KNOW. WE DID SOME RESEARCH. I WAS CURIOUS.

Scully smiled. WHO IS THIS? she gestured to the baby in her own arms.

"That's Kenny," Frohike supplied.

"After Soona?" Mulder asked.

Frohike and Byers nodded.

"So let's get back to my first question." Mulder turned so his back was to Thea. "How old is she?"

Frohike and Byers looked at each other.

"Guys," Mulder said, "don't make me beat it out of anyone."

"It's complicated," Frohike finally answered. "She's tank-grown. Accelerated development. She says she was conceived in 1989. But Mulder, who the hell really knows with these guys?"

Mulder scowled then turned back to Thea and Scully. "Jesus," he muttered.

"You can understand why we were hesitant to let you know about her at first," Byers said. "When she showed up we had no idea what her affiliations were, if she was who or what she claimed to be.

"Anyone could have sent her," Frohike added, "hoping to get to you two."

"Even once we confirmed that she was your offspring, she still could have been a plant intended to flush you out of hiding," Byers jumped in.

"But we couldn't exactly turn her out on the street, either," Frohike said.

"She turned out to have quite an aptitude for certain endeavors," Byers said earnestly. "She's very good. Sort of a chip off the old block," he smiled unconvincingly. "Which, in some ways, made her more dangerous."

"She started out just hacking," Frohike said.

"We aren't that irresponsible. But for such an intelligent person she has a surprising amount of difficulty grasping the meaning of simple things, like 'stay in the van'," Byers went on.

"She has a very cool head in a crisis," Frohike said, "and she's persistent. You might say stubborn. Strong as an ox, too."

"By the time we figured she was legitimate, we didn't want to see her out on her own again," Byers explained. "We figured we could, at the very least, keep an eye on her. That that's what you and Scully would do if the situation were reversed."

"And by that time, well," Frohike shrugged, "she didn't want to be anywhere else, either, if you know what I mean."

Mulder had been looking back and forth during the rapid-fire exchange. Finally, he just shook his head as if to clear it and looked down at the baby in his arms. "Yeah, I'm pretty clear on what you mean."

"Melvin and I had no idea she and Langly were, um, intimate," Byers added. "Not until, well..."

"Until the damage had been done, so to speak." Frohike swallowed. "Don't kill him, Mulder."

Mulder seemed to think about this, then he addressed the boy in his arms. "Me? Kill your daddy? I wouldn't dream of it." He looked up. "I might bruise him a little, though."

"Byers already did that," Frohike said, pantomiming a punch to the jaw.

"Good for your Uncle John," Mulder said in a high baby-talk voice. "I think you have your grandma's mouth, Joey. That's good because your daddy has no lips. He's the chicken-lipped man. He could be an X-file. Have you heard of the X-Files?"

Scully rolled her eyes. She snuggled Kenny close to her chest and something caught her eye. A dark figure was outside the window, watching.

"Mulder," she said quietly, adrenalin coursed through her veins, "someone is at-"

Before she could finish the thought, Thea turned and rapped on the window.

DAMMIT, RITCHIE, she signed through the glass, GET IN THE HOUSE BEFORE YOU FREEZE TO DEATH!

A gust of cold and a chattering of teeth later, Langly was standing in front of the wood stove shivering. Thea signed as she tended to him.

RITCHIE, WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING? She stripped off his snow-plastered flannel shirt. She pulled his wet thermal over his head next. DO YOU WANT TO HAVE TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL? IS THAT YOUR PLAN? ARE MY PARENTS REALLY SO SCARY THAT YOU'D HAVE TO GO STAND OUT IN THE SNOW LIKE THAT? THESE ARE YOUR FRIENDS, REMEMBER? She pulled off a layer that seemed to consist of at least three black t-shirts. His skin was shockingly blue-white. Thea rubbed his chest and arms vigorously before wrapping her arms around him. DON'T BE SO STUPID.

Scully blinked. She doubted Langly had ever been in better shape. Corded muscles in his arms and chest left little doubt in her mind as to who'd chopped the winter's worth of firewood she'd seen stacked outside. Obviously, regular sex with a vigorous girl half his age had worked miracles for Langly.

STAY IN FRONT OF THE FIRE, I'LL GET YOU SOME DRY CLOTHES. Thea signed. AND COFFEE, I'LL GET YOU COFFEE, TOO. She looked around. OH, I SHOULD GET EVERYONE COFFEE, RIGHT? IF YOU WANT IT, I MEAN. YES?

Scully nodded. PLEASE, she signed. CAN I HELP?

Thea shook her head. NO. She turned back to Langly. THAT WAS STUPID, RITCHIE. REALLY STUPID. She left the room.

Heavy silence hung in the air for a moment, interrupted only by the crackle of the fire.

"Um, hi," Langly all but whispered.

"Nice babies," Mulder said.

"Very nice babies," Scully agreed.

"We like 'em," Langly said.

"I bet half the fun was making them," Mulder said in an even tone that Scully knew meant he was barely holding his anger in check.

Langly groaned. "Jesus, Mulder, I didn't...She...I...we...Jesus." He dropped his head into his hands and groaned again. For a moment, Scully was afraid he was going to start hyperventilating.

"Oh, spare us the tale of how you were ravished by a teenaged virgin, Don Juan," Frohike snorted. "It's gone from funny to pathetic, okay?"

Scully looked down at Kenny. "You suppose she's like Betty, Mulder?"

"The thought crossed my mind," Mulder answered. Scully could see he was stroking Joey's tiny palm. "But I'm still thinking about bruising him, just on principle."

Langly groaned again.

"Jo-ey, Jo-ey," Mulder sing-songed. He turned to her. "Scully, I've made a decision."

"Oh?"

"Let's have another baby."

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Scully blinked at him. "I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that," she said, smiling at Kenny. "Your grandpa is a silly, silly man - very silly. I've considered selling tickets."

Despite the soporific effect of baby snuggling, Mulder was still pissed. "Well, we could take you home with us," he told Joey in that sing song voice. "There are three of you, after all. Who's going to notice?"

Byers snorted. "You know the term 'mother bear with her cubs'?" he asked. "Thea was the one they had in mind, Mulder"

"Langly wouldn't let you get very far, either." Frohike assured him. "He's a dumb-ass, but he loves his kids."

By this time, Thea had returned with Langly's dry clothes and headed off to make coffee, a task which appeared to both challenge and perplex her. Langly, redressed, took the third baby from Frohike's arms.

Mulder nodded. "What's his name, *Ritchie*?"

"Ted," Langly said. "After his mama."

"What, no Dick Jr.?" Mulder said as smarmily as possible.

For two seconds Langly looked at Mulder with an expression Mulder knew mirrored his own - a squinting smile that was no smile at all.

Byers, Frohike, and Scully traded expectant looks. Suddenly, something clanged loudly from the other end of the room. All three babies startled at once.

"Does Thea need help?" Scully asked. "With the coffee, I mean?"

Langly shook his head. "No, she's cool."

Thea interrupted the conversation by appearing with a tray of coffee and cookies. She set it on the coffee table, seeming inordinately pleased. HAVE COOKIES, she signed. AND COFFEE.

Mulder watched as, without fanfare but in a nonetheless seamless waltz, Thea and Langly passed infant, cookies, and gulps of hot beverage back and forth. They sat in the rocking chair together, Thea wedged between Langly's legs, the baby somehow in both their arms.

HAVE YOU SEEN BEAUTIFUL? Thea asked, shifting the baby's face toward Scully.

LANGLY SAID HIS NAME WAS TED, Mulder signed.

HIS FIRST NAME IS TED, Thea signed. FOR HIS MIDDLE NAME, I NAMED HIM BEAUTIFUL. AFTER HIS FATHER. IT'S A NICE NAME? she asked.

Mulder kept his hands still. "Beats a woodland creature, I guess," he said to Scully.

Scully gave him a scowl. IT'S LOVELY. THEY ARE ALL LOVELY BABIES.

Thea smiled.

SO, THEA, Scully signed as she perched on one of the sofas. BYERS SAID YOU HAVE SOME SPECIAL ABILITIES. MATH?

I HAVE A CERTAIN DEGREE OF COMPETENCE WITH NUMBERS AND PATTERNS, Thea signed and took another sip from her shared cup.

"She's a damn genius," Frohike said.

There was a sharp knocking at the door accompanied by a shrill bark, and Byers took off like he'd been shot from a canon. Minutes later a parka'd figure carrying a Bichon Frise stood shaking snow off in front of the fire. The narrow viewing tube at the front of the coat unzipped and there, somewhat to Mulder's surprise, stood a woman.

She was some where between Langly and Byers in height, straddling the line between voluptuous and chubby, with thick, curly blonde hair that looked to Mulder like it had been carefully combed with a wrench.

Byers gave a her a warm kiss in greeting. "Hey, hon."

Byers had a girlfriend?

Byers had a girlfriend.

"Amanda Wilde, Martin and Laura Levine. Marty and Laura, this is Amanda."

Amanda looked like she was trying hard not to smirk. "Thea's parents, right? I've heard, well, I've heard almost nothing about you."

"Oh really?" Mulder shook her hand.

"Oddly, every time I ask, these goons just look at each other. So what are you? Fugitives from justice? Part of the witness protection program?"

Scully smiled as she shook Amanda's hand. "Something like that."

Mulder smiled. "Now we're going to have to use our mind control ray to erase your memory of this meeting."

"Could you erase my first semester of grad school while you're at it?"

"I'll have to charge extra for that," Mulder countered.

"I have a little socked away, so what the hey. I'd just blow it on my cabana boy here, anyway." She turned to Byers. "The weather's turning nasty. You almost ready to go?"

"You're taking our rebel without a serviette away?" Mulder asked.

"Kronk is spending the night at my place so you and yours can be spared the couches of death."

"*Kronk*?" Mulder asked Byers. Byers just shrugged and blushed.

"We don't want to put anyone out," Scully said.

Amanda held up her hand. "Kronk cooks. Then does the dishes. Then sweeps. And then he hacks into a satellite so I can get 'It's a Wonderful Life' in Mandarin with Spanish subtitles. It's pure self-sacrifice on my part."

"You're spoiled," Byers told her, grinning.

Frohike sniffed. "That's what that funny smell is"

"Cuba!" Amanda swatted him with her glove.

"*Cuba*?" Mulder asked.

Frohike shrugged.

Byers already had his coat and was carefully putting on his gloves. "Well, I'm off to sleep in a yurt with a Bichon Frise."

"A yurt? Is a yurt what I think it is?" Scully asked. "Like a tent? In this weather?"

"I have a generator. And a rug. A wood stove. It's pretty warm." Amanda replied. "Right, John."

"I love your yurt," Byers replied almost automatically. It was clear they'd had something like that conversation before.

"You spend enough time there," Frohike said.

Byers scowled at Frohike, shook Mulder's hand, then pecked Thea and Scully on the cheek. WE'LL JOIN YOU FOR BREAKFAST, he signed and said. He picked up the dog and all but dragged his lady friend out the door, which shut firmly but not too loudly behind them.

"Whoa," Mulder said. "Whoa. That was...did we fall down the rabbit hole, Scully? If you tell me you've found the love of your life, Melvin, oh, I mean, *Cuba*, I'm going to plotz."

Frohike tilted his head and shrugged. "They call it the land of enchantment for a reason."

"No shit?"

"No shit." Frohike nodded. "Her name's Cindy. She's a baker. Made the cookies you're scarfing down. You know what a sucker I am for women in the food service industry."

"And she's got these enormous..." Langly began.

Mulder turned to Langly. "My wife and daughter are in the room, *Ritchie.* Watch your mouth."

Langly shrank back. YOU SLEEPY, MAMA? Langly signed as small as he could, but Mulder still caught it.

THEY CAME ALL THIS WAY, Thea signed and then yawned. I DON'T WANT TO CRAP OUT ON EVERYONE.

WE'LL STILL BE HERE IN THE MORNING, Scully signed.

SLEEP, Mulder signed. FROHIKE AND I HAVE A LOT OF CATCHING UP TO DO.

GO ON, KID, YOU KNOW YOU NEED IT, Frohike agreed.

After Langly and Thea had collected their offspring and climbed the stairs, Mulder turned to Frohike.

"When were the babies born? July? August?"

"November 2nd," Frohike answered.

Mulder heard Scully's breath catch. Emily had been born on November second, he remembered.

Mulder frowned. "No way those babies are 6 weeks old."

"They're pretty advanced for six weeks," Scully put in.

"The best we can understand it, Thea's ova were changed. I don't pretend to know how they did it, but they did," Frohike said quietly. "Those grandsons of yours are super-soldiers"

"The super-soldiers are alien-human hybrids," Scully said. "If she's our daughter, Thea isn't an alien."

"I've often wondered if Langly's from another planet, though," Mulder countered.

"They're as human as you are," Frohike said. "But there's iron woven into every strand of DNA they have."

"What?" Mulder asked. "DNA doesn't work like that."

"Theirs does."

"You have proof?" Scully asked. "Show me."

Frohike nodded. He disappeared into a tiny mud cubicle and returned with a disc. "These are the tests that we've been able to have done discreetly. We wanted to do a few more, but Thea put her foot down. She said she spent too much of her own life as a science experiment. Langly backed her up, of course, so it was a done deal."

"I understand," Scully replied coolly, taking the disc. She stepped efficiently to a monitor. When Mulder attempted to follow, she gave him a pointed look. "I'll be right back," she said. She wanted, apparently, to be alone.

Frohike sighed. "I guess some things never change."

"She needs some time to digest." Mulder settled into his seat. "I've gotten used to it. She'll let me know what she finds."

He and Frohike sat watching each other, unsure of what to say.

"So," Mulder said as quietly as possible. "No bullshit now, tell me what happened, Frohike "

"Where do you want me to start?" Frohike asked.

"The beginning usually works."

"You asked for it." Frohike explained it all, as best he could.

Mulder sat back after a good ten minutes and frowned. "Why does the D&D bother me more than the naked Twister?" he asked when Frohike's story reached its end.

Frohike snorted.

"So you think Langly seduced her unintentionally?" Mulder asked. "His forbidden love communicating with her through what, binary code? My heart goes pitter pat."

"Nothin' that girl's got is repressed, Mulder," Frohike answered. "Dumb-ass told himself it was innocent and friendly because that was what he wanted to believe. That's what he was comfortable with. You ask either one of 'em and they'll tell you the initiative was all hers. But you know Langly's luck - first time out of the box, he knocks her up."

Frohike chuckled, and Mulder wondered at the bald-assed absurdity of life. He wished he didn't see the humor in it, but he did. It was a ridiculous world they lived in. He shook his head.

"Who knows about the existence of the babies, outside of the family?" Mulder asked.

"Friends, neighbors, the usual. But because of the home birth, we managed to avoid an official record." Frohike said.

"Yeah. I'm still trying to wrap my brain around Langly delivering triplets by firelight."

"Tell me about it." Frohike curled his lip. "But I guess he learned something practical growing up on that dairy farm, after all."

The rolling of an office chair interrupted their conversation. Scully stood and walked toward them, looking concerned but resigned.

"Diagnosis, Dr. Levine?" Mulder asked, attempting to keep the mood light.

"They're Langly's and they're Thea's. And Thea is definitely ours."

"Congratulations. It's a girl," Mulder said. He felt gut-punched. Until Scully's confirmation, it was all just theoretical. Now it was fact.

Scully didn't look amused. "The babies definitely possess anomalies consistent with those we saw in Billy Miles and the few other super-soldiers we were able to examine. I don't understand how it was done, but it was done."

"Wow," Mulder said.

"From a chromosomal standpoint, they are completely human. But along the branched helix surface which they could have inherited from you or me, every cell appears to be what amounts to steel-reinforced. There are some other chemical reactions going on with functions I can't explain." She paused and exhaled deeply. "From what I can see, Frohike is right. They can't be hurt. Physically."

"Just emotionally," Mulder added, the slightest smile on his lips.

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"Well," Scully said, sitting down heavily on the edge of Byers' double bed. She'd changed into pajamas and washed off her make-up and had been trying to digest it all. It wasn't working.

"Well," Mulder repeated, sitting beside her but avoiding her eye.

"So," she said.

"So."

"Stop that, Mulder."

Mulder smiled, then is expression grew serious. "Scully, let's take them back with us. Thea and the babies, I mean. We could manage it."

"Are you serious?" Scully asked. She looked at him. "You are, aren't you?"

He didn't answer.

"Just how do you propose we do this, Mulder? Handcuffs or duct tape?"

"But if we explained - "

"Explained what?"

Mulder frowned. He looked like a petulant two year old. "I don't know. Just explained."

Scully shrugged. "What could we say that wouldn't permanently alienate Thea and Langly, and probably Byers and Frohike, too?"

"I hear it's good to open with a joke," Mulder deadpanned. "Lightens the mood."

"Experience suggests I'd say something wrong and then you'd say something worse and we'd probably never see those boys again. Is that what you want?"

"No," Mulder shook his head. "It's just- She's just so young." He sighed and shrugged. "It's weird, though, isn't it, how sometimes the smallest event can lead you somewhere you couldn't have ever predicted?"

"What do you mean?"

"If I hadn't followed Susanne Modeski to that electronics convention in Baltimore, I wouldn't have spooked her to the point where she willing to ask three strange if sympathetic men for help. And if she hadn't brought the three of them together, I probably wouldn't have met them. And if I'd never met them, Gibson couldn't have told Thea to go to them. And-"

"And you wouldn't be a grandfather at the ripe old age of 45," Scully concluded for him.

"Exactly."

"I think the moral here is, 'never go to electronics conventions.'"

"Sound advice." He gave her a gentle smile. "I was expecting a child. A little girl, maybe two or three years old. Maybe even a baby. One new child to worry about. Not four."

"Five, if you count Langly."

Mulder shuddered theatrically. "If he calls me 'dad," I'll hurt him. I'll hurt him bad."

"If he calls me 'mom,' I'll help you hurt him bad."

He held out his hand to her. "Deal."

They shook on it, then fell into silence again. "You know," he said and ran his hand through his hair, "Byers and Frohike would never do this to me."

Scully yawned behind her hand. "I think most of the doing was done to Thea."

"Ha ha," Mulder said, without mirth. "She's 17. He's 38. And the worst part is, I keep getting the feeling I'm not as angry as I should be."

"That's understandable. Strong family resemblance aside-"

"Hard to miss that nose, huh?"

"-she's a stranger, Mulder."

"She is." He nodded. "She has your hands, though."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. I noticed right away. When she was signing."

"Your nose."

"Poor kid," Mulder said. "She looks a lot like Sylvie."

Scully's voice was small. "Like Emily, too."

Mulder nodded, then wrapped his arm around her and pulled her close. Another moment of silence passed. "I feel cheated, Scully. We should have had a chance to spoil her and discipline her and take her to the playground and break up fights for her. She should have been ours."

"She's practically an x-file," Scully said into his chest. "That makes her ours, right?"

Mulder suddenly realized he was blinking back tears. "I tasted her coffee. That's an x-file right there."

She chuckled. "That was coffee?"

"It might have been tar," Mulder amended.

"That would explain why it stripped all the flesh from the back of my throat."

Mulder snorted. "When you think about them, it's kind of sweet."

Scully pulled back so she could look into his face. "Sweet?"

"Conspiracy theorist meets the lab experiment of his dreams," he said. "It's like a valentine from Groom Lake."

She nodded. "All things considered, he doesn't seem like such a bad son-in-law. It could be worse."

Mulder shrugged. "I guess it could be Frohike."

"And they do make beautiful babies."

"No argument there," he agreed. He dropped a kiss on her forehead. "You know, if I didn't love the guy, this wouldn't hurt so much."

For a moment, Scully just blinked at him. "You really do keep unfolding like a flower, Grandpa."

Mulder smiled. "I believe my official title is 'Grandpa Dude.'"

Scully yawned. "Let's get some sleep, Grandpa Dude. I have a feeling this house isn't real quiet after 6 a.m."

They crawled into Byers' bed. After a few moments of tossing and turning, Scully sighed dramatically. "What are we going to do when Sylvie wants to get married?"

"Sylvie's 5, Scully, and I'm 45. With any luck, I'll be dead by then."

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

"I love you, cold, unfeeling robot arm," the green-faced alien on the screen declared, the accompanying text scrolling simultaneously by.

Scully watched her eldest daughter sign along. Apparently, Thea'd seen this episode before. At home, this cartoon was on the censored-television list. Too disturbing, Scully felt, too violent, and the entire premise set Mulder's hair at attention. Grim little alien invaders, even of the animated variety, were not welcome in the Levine household.

A horseshoe of pillows surrounded Thea as she nursed two babies at once. The third - Kenny, Scully thought, but she wasn't quite sure yet - was being bottle-fed on his father's lap. Danny stroked a baby's foot intently, while Sylvie sat on the other side of her newly-discovered sister, absorbed by the forbidden cartoon.

Sylvie poked Thea's bicep.

IS THE ROBOT ARM HIS MOM OR SOMETHING? Sylvie asked.

MORE OR LESS, Thea answered, BUT NOT A GOOD ONE.

AND HE'S HUGGING THE SCARY LADY BECAUSE SHE REMINDS HIM OF THE ROBOT ARM? Sylvie went on with her stubby fingers.

Thea nodded, turning her face back to the screen. IT'S LIKE THAT SOMETIMES.

Sylvie poked her again. HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN GROWN UP?

I DON'T KNOW. Thea frowned. WHY?

YOU HAVE TO BE GROWN UP TO GET MARRIED AND GET A RING. YOU HAVE A NICE RING. I LIKE IT. IT'S LIKE THE ONES IN THE GUMBALL MACHINE AT THE PIGGLY WIGGLY, ALL SHINY AND SPARKLY. MY MOM'S RING IS BORING.

Thea smiled. YOU WANT TO WEAR IT FOR A WHILE?

Sylvie nodded like a crazed marionette.

Langly looked at the two of them over the tops of his glasses "Don't lose it, Sylvie," he said. DON'T FORGET SHE HAS IT, T, he signed.

Sylvie spied her mother on the staircase and shot up like an exploding kernel of popcorn.

MOM! MOM! MOM! MOM! DID YOU KNOW I HAVE A SISTER? Sylvie yelled and signed standing on tip toes, as if to make herself better heard.

OF COURSE SHE KNOWS, DUMMY, SHE'S THEA'S MOTHER, TOO, Danny signed, sitting up straighter. SHE'S MY SISTER TOO, YOU KNOW.

YOU ALREADY HAVE A SISTER, Sylvie signed, the diamond ring on her thumb glittering as she did so. THEA IS MY SISTER.

WELL, SHE'S DEAF LIKE ME, HEARING GIRL, Danny answered. SO THERE.

IT IS TOO EARLY FOR THIS, Scully signed and said. WAIT UNTIL I HAVE HAD MY COFFEE, AT LEAST.

WHO DOES SHE BELONG TO? Danny pressed.

Scully looked at Thea. Thea looked at Scully.

ALL OF US. WE'RE ALL FAMILY. EVERYONE BELONGS TO EACH OTHER Scully said. It sounded like the answer her mother would have given. She wasn't too sure how she felt about that.

WHAT ABOUT HIM? Danny asked, practically jerking his thumb into Langly's ear.

"He ours, too," Sylvie chimed. HE BELONGS TO T, SO HE BELONGS TO US, TOO, RIGHT?

Langly looked at Scully over the tops of his glasses, waiting to see what she said.

Scully shrugged. That one was tougher. WHAT DO YOU THINK? She signed.

HE MADE US BREAKFAST WHILE DAD WAS RUNNING, Sylvie said and signed. I THINK WE SHOULD KEEP HIM.

HE WARMED UP PIZZA. PIZZA IS NOT BREAKFAST, Danny argued

IF YOU EAT IT IN THE MORNING, IT'S BREAKFAST, Thea explained.

"It's definitely breakfast." Langly spoke as Sylvie nodded in agreement. "If you eat it at lunch time, then it's lunch. At dinnertime, it's dinner. It's not too complicated."

SEE? Sylvie looked smug. SO CAN HE BE OURS?

SURE, Scully signed. WHY NOT?

DO I GET A SAY IN THIS? Langly asked, mock seriously.

Simultaneously, the three women in the room signed, NO.

Langly looked more than a little surprised. "Oh."

"CONGRATULATIONS. YOU'RE A LEVINE." Scully smiled. "ANY REHEATED PIZZA LEFT?"

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Scully was waiting for the coffee to finish, and Mulder was making his way through a second bowl of forbidden Cap'n Crunch, when the ceiling started flashing.

"Doorbell?" Mulder frowned.

"Phone, I think," Scully replied.

"I think you're right," he said, shoveling more cereal into his mouth. "It's either the phone or a nuclear melt down."

Scully was too decaffeinated to come up with a reply. Instead, she watched the scene taking place on the other side of the cavernous room. Thea was on the phone. The ear piece was cupped against her cheek and she appeared to be tapping into the receiver.

Scully raised her eyebrows. Thea appeared to be bickering over the phone in Morse code.

Well, that was different.

Thea set down the old rotary phone, shaking her head. Langly was sitting up with a lap full of babies, yawning, telling Sylvie something Scully couldn't quite hear, and Sylvie, in turn, was signing something to Danny that Scully couldn't quite see.

MY PARENTS COME TO TOWN AND EVERYONE I KNOW LOSES THEIR MIND! Thea signed emphatically to the room at large.

Langly signed a question mark to his forehead.

NOW WE ARE SUPPOSED TO MEET AT LAMBERT'S IN TWO HOURS.

LAMBERT'S? Langly asked, wide-eyed.

SHORT MAN SAYS DR. UNDERPANTS IS BUYING.

Sylvie and Danny giggled.

"What's Lambert's?" Mulder said and signed simultaneously. "And do I want to know who is Dr. Underpants is?"

"Lambert's is entrees at fifty bucks a pop," Langly answered. "Dr. Underpants is John-Boy's honey. Amanda."

"Ah."

Sylvie and Danny giggled harder. Sylvie signed 'DOCTOR UNDERPANTS' over and over.

SO NOW WE ALL HAVE TO CHANGE CLOTHES, Thea complained.

Scully looked both Thea and Langly up and down. They were covered in those tell-tale spit-up stains she remembered less than fondly from Danny and later Sylvie's infant days. Changing into something clean didn't sound like a bad idea.

THAT MIGHT BE TRICKY, Langly signed.

Thea frowned. IS ANYTHING CLEAN?

ALL THE BABY STUFF, he answered.

Thea scowled. ONLY THE BABY STUFF?

Langly nodded.

YOU'LL LOOK REALLY HOT IN THAT ONESIE WITH THE BABY DUCKS ON IT, RITCHIE. Thea scowled. SERIOUSLY, THERE ARE NO BIG PEOPLE CLOTHES?

Langly pushed his glasses up with his thumb and forefinger. WHEN WOULD I HAVE DONE LAUNDRY, T? IN MY SLEEP?

HOPE SPRINGS ETERNAL. She shrugged as she signed, COULD I BORROW-

Her husband cut her off. I HAVE EXACTLY ONE CLEAN SWEATER. WANNA ARM WRESTLE FOR IT?

THEN WHAT WOULD YOU WEAR? She scowled harder.

THEA, Scully signed, I'M SURE MARTY-

She stopped. Danny and Sylvie were looking at her expectantly.

-I'M SURE YOUR FATHER HAS SOMETHING YOU CAN BORROW. MARTY?

She looked at her husband. He was giving her a slow, sweet smile.

I'M SURE I DO, he agreed.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

End 11/12