Main Beach (#590)
     The beach here is of a fine, glittering black sand... volcanic sand, remnants of a long-past eruption. The beach is fairly wide, which is a good thing since many of the Weyr's dragons like to come here and lounge in the sun. The crystal blue waters of the ocean roll up in gentle hissing waves on the shoreline, sometimes leaving shells or other treasures from the sea in their wake. On the north and south ends of the beach, the cliff from the plateau retreats into the forest, and trees flank the beaches.
     It is an autumn midmorning.

Brencia (#16352)
     A toddler's bright and inquisitive nut-brown eyes, dark lashes and button nose are framed in a full, round-cheeked smile. Innocent wonder and mischief light her miniature frame, her lengthening, wild chestnut hair fanning about her face as it escapes every attempt at confinement. Tiny freckles fleck sun-shaded skin, a small brown child full of laughter.
     Short pants of durable purple fabric hang from Brencia's small waist down to her scraped and dirty knees, topped with a shirt that was once a soft shade of lavendar, but now, seems more like a shade of dirt. Along with the small string of embroidered flowers that encircle the toddler's throat, the shirt is decorated with streaks looking similar to tiny handprints, bluish-purple stains only traceable back to bubbly pies, and drops of red, most likely from the morning's cup of redfruit juice. Her small feet are covered by a pair of dusty but durable wherhide sandals in their natural shade of brown.
     Brencia is 2 Turns, 6 months, and 11 days old.

T'rell (#5123)
     A small fellow, his shoulders are broad, his hands well-calloused, and his form compact and fit. His dirt-brown eyes sparkle with mischief and humor to lend a joke to his short and wavy hair, which has become quite a remarkable shade of light grey. His cleanshaven features are unlined except when he's laughing and are free and mobile with his expressions, such that all his five feet and four inches of height are alight with a juvenile and contagious spirit.
     Dark trousers look sturdy, and beneath a dark brown wingrider's jacket, marked with a patch bearing a cresting wave and a bronze dragon, a sea-blue shirt is tailored to fit. A worn belt is fastened with a bronze knotwork buckle, and itself is more functional than decorative; his boots haven't been replaced in turns, and are ash-scarred. From a shoulder epaulet, triple cords of orange, black, and bright metallic bronze loop once and again around the pendant bars that signal his rank of Wingleader. A small, alert child, Brencia squirms in T'rell's arms.
     T'rell is 39 Turns, 2 months, and 26 days old.

Kaeryn (#7720)
     With a height of about 5 foot 4, this young woman is not exactly overbearing in stature, but the confident air about her makes her seem a little taller. The strands of her golden hair flow fluidly down her back, ending in gentle curls at her waist. Bringing attention to the features of her heart shaped face are her blue eyes, highlighted with golden flecks, that sparkle mischievously in the light. Her skin is lightly tanned and delicate, tiny freckles powdering her small nose. A mysterious look in her eyes, and the way her pale pink lips upturn in a smile make her seem even more attractive. On her right wrist, there is a strip of harper blue wherhide that was formed into a bracelet.
     A soft, luxurious flaxen dress in a rich shade of blue drapes gracefully from Kae's shoulders. The neckline is gently scalloped, scooping down just enough to show off her slender neck and the thin silver necklace that encircles it. The sleeves are short, ending about a third of the way down to her elbow, and the hem of each is decorated with silver threaded embroidery. The bodice is close fitting but flares out just below the chest, where it curves over her swollen belly.. On her feet is a pair of wherhide sandals that are perfect for the Istan heat and sun, protecting her soles from the hot sand or ground but allowing her feet to stay cool.
     A bright silver knot dangles from a fine silver chain, a mark of friendship. A knot of blue and white adorns Kae's shoulder . Two twisted chords formed into a pair of loops and a tassle, all threaded through with a ribbon of gold, representing her rank as a Master of the Harper Hall. Within the knot rests a single stone of Sapphire and ribbons of black and orange signifying her posting as Istan WeyrHarper. She is wearing a silver and gold braided chain bracelet with the Dolphinsinger charms.
     A healthy glow touches her slightly rounded cheeks, accenting the usual sparkle in her blue eyes. When added to her rounding belly, and overly motherly charms, assumptions made are probably true.
     Kaeryn is 28 Turns, 7 months, and 1 day old.

T'rell and Brencia descend the hill to the beach, girl's hand in her father's as she navigates the rocky path carelessly. The man spots the harper across the sandy expanse and calls her name cheerfully. "'Morning, Kaeryn!"

Kaeryn releases the leaf that had been resting in her open palm, allowing the wind to lift it from her hand and into the breeze, where it drifts out over the water and down into the rolling waves. "Good morning, you two. Did you have a good breakfast?" she calls out in response before leaning over and collecting a few shells from the dark sand.

The small girl wriggles her hand free from dad's steadying grip and dashes toward Mom. "Yummmm!" she exclaims in answer, throwing herself at Kaeryn heedlessly with bright giggles.

Kaeryn reaches out to catch the toddler as she vaults in her mother's direction, and scoops Brencia gently up into her arms, planting kisses on the round little cheeks. "Yum you say? Why so yum? What'd you have to eat this morning?" An accusing glance is sent in T'rell's direction and the question is aimed at her daughter, "Daddy didn't let you have bubblies for breakfast again, did he?"

"Bubblies for breakfast?!" T'rell exclaims in mock-horror. "Never." He raises his hands and shrugs cluelessly. "She just had cereal. Okay, maybe she had a little extra sweetening," he admits. "But she's just bouncing off the walls today." The man grins, shading his eyes from the morning sun as he surveys the whitecapped ocean. "Me, on the other hand -- I never should've let F'van get me into that drinking contest."

"It wouldn't be the first time she'd managed to have them for breakfast," Kae replies, mussing the toddler's hair, much to Brencia's dismay, and then setting her on the ground again to run freely. "She's already learned how to get what she wants, when she behaves, so people tend to let her do as she pleases, something I'm hoping to curb soon." The shells are inspected, a few are pocketed, and the remaining ones are tossed out into the water. "On duty today?"

T'rell shakes his head and grimaces slightly at the motion, lowering himself to the sand slightly more carefully than usual. "Nope. As long as Sejith's on duty on the sands, we're off sweeps," he leans back, folding his hands behind his head to relax into the sun. "I just have to be around to get the reports in by noon." He closes his eyes, then cracks one open again to watch Kaeryn. "You busy today?"

"Oh, that's right," Kae scrunches up her nose at the idea and follows his motion, lowering herself to the ground as well, skirts falling protectively over her legs as she settles. "I'll send word to Ali, see if she'll mind retrieving Jathen when he's due to come now, which is in a few days again, and just hope she's available. Great timing though, truly." A pout touches the harper's lips for a moment, but she brushes it away, unwilling to let such a small problem worry her. "If necessary, I'll just have to trust Hytiaf."

T'rell reaches an arm over to rest on Kaeryn's back as she sits. "Hey, if it comes down to it, I'm sure Sejith can get a few minutes' leave from his egg-sitting job. I'm surprised he's even there to begin with." Eyes closed, he soaks in the morning sun.

"Not if Quarith is anything like a human mother-to-be," Kae notes with a shrug and a soft laugh. "I can't blame her for wanting him there. I wanted you by my side when Brencia was born. She may be a dragon, but she's still female."

A breeze brushes the dragonrider's short hair across his forehead and tugs at Kaeryn's skirts. T'rell cracks open his eyes, shading them with a hand. "You didn't need me there every minute of every day of your last two months, though," he points out wryly.

"Careful there, rider, or I might just make you this time," Kae teases as she struggles to keep her skirts from lifting her off the sand. "Of course, that would mean you still have another four sevendays or so before I force you to stay by my side at all times, so you'd better use it."

A few feet away, Brencia squats on the sand, intently watching something. "Mommy, Daddy, lookit!" she calls in a hushed, excited voice. "Lookit!" T'rell props himself up on an elbow to glance across the beach. "What's she got there, a spiderclaw?" the man wonders, unwilling to stir too much now that he's gotten comfortable. Yet at the girl's insistant "C'mmere!" he groans and pushes up, a hand steadying his temple. "C'mere *what*, 'Cia?" he prompts.

Kaeryn follows suit once again, pushing herself up from the sand with a slight groan, not being quite as easy to do with her expanding belly, and moves toward the pleading calls to see just what it is that their daughter has managed to get herself into now. "What is it, sweetheart? What did you find this time?"

Brencia stabs a small finger toward a retreating snake. "Look!" As it slithers away, the girl hops up and trots after it. "See? Snake!" Proudly, she keeps pace with it, showing off her knowledge.

Brightly colored marks show on the small snake, which, none too pleased at being chased, slithers to the shelter of a beachside rock.

Kaeryn groans and takes a step in the reverse direction, not exactly eager to follow after the slithering creature, nor to allow her daughter to do so either. "'Cia, come back here, please, and leave it to do as it will, please?" a worried tone touches the harper's voice and she glances toward T'rell, obviously expecting him to rid them of the problem, or at least move their daughter from it, since she obviously isn't going much closer.

T'rell follows after the toddler with a crooked grin to Kaeryn. "Bren," his voice slows her pursuit, and he catches her easily. "Snakes aren't to be chased, kiddo." She frowns and tugs against his firm grip. "Some of them can be very dangerous, you know that, right? What kind is this, do you know?" Chastened, she shakes her head slowly. "So how do you know it won't bite you?"

With a grimace, Kae steps up to the pair's side, confident that T'rell wouldn't stand where he is if it were a dangerous place to be, and realizing that she probably knows as much about the creatures as her daughter does. Of course, while Brencia seems to like them, Kae has an obvious *dis*like of them. "Would it?" she queries quietly, peering toward the creature.

T'rell glances into the shadows under the rock for a glimpse of the sheltering snake. "See that pattern on its back?" he points out to both mother and daughter. "That means it's a black diamondback. They're one of the less-poisonous varieties around here," he explains. "And luckily, they're shy. But if you go after it," His grip on Brencia's wrist keeps the curious child from crowding the frightened creature, "it'll bite. If you're lucky, it's no worse than a hangover," he grins ruefully. "If you're not, you'll probably survive anyway." With that, he scoops the girl up and away from her find, despite her protests.

"Why is it that children want to pick up and play with any moving creature they spot?" Kae wonders aloud as she turns and heads away from the rocks and back to the space they formerly occupied. "I don't really recall doing so myself, but I did spend most of my time in the stables with the runners, so I guess I didn't need to play with other creatures."

T'rell grins, putting Brencia down again. "I did. My brother and either caught or scared off every tunnelsnake or crawler in the hold, between us," he asserts with a touch of pre-adolescent pride. "Ho there, miss Brencia," his alert hand catches the girl by her waist, preventing her from dashing back up to the snake. "I think you ought to leave that snake alone for a while. Give 'im a head start, eh?"

"Just not my cup of klah," Kae mutters, lowering herself back to the sand and making herself comfortable again, her bare toes digging into the black sand and allowing themselves to be covered. "So I'll let you cover the lessons on snakes and crawlers and I'll cover the ones I know, deal?" Chin is tilted so she can watch the father-daughter pair for a moment before closing her eyes to protect them from the growing brightness of the day.

The toddler wriggles in her father's protective grasp. "Wanna go see my snake!" she protests, working herself up into a mini-tantrum. "I found it!" She insists possessively, arms straining to reach it.

"No." T'rell lays down the law, capturing Brencia's attention with a solemn gaze. "That's enough." A few more struggles are ignored, much to the girl's dissatisfaction. Wide-eyed, her look pleads to mom -- c'mon, side with me? Tears begin to glisten in her eyes, and she works herself up into a wail of protest. "Jays, 'Cia." Her father, not unmoved by her sobs, sighs. "Fine. I'd rather have you cry yourself out than end up in the infirmary, much as I like Hytiaf."

"'Cia, come on over here, will you?" Kae calls from her comfort zone away from the snake and whatever other creatures might just be hiding in that area. "Only a few more days left of swimming before the water is too cold for little girls your age. Wouldn't you like to have a swim before your nap today? If you don't listen to your daddy, you won't be able to do that, you know."

Just as glad to relinquish responsibility over the recalcitrant Brencia, T'rell finds his spot on the warm sand again, silent. His daughter is anything but. "Wanna pla-ay with my sna-aa-ake," she sobs, pleading to her mother after her father proved, once again, deaf.

"As your father said, you aren't allowed to play with snakes. It could bite you and that would *really* hurt, and then you'd probably have to spend the next few days in the infirmary," Kae explains, nudging the girl so she settles on the sand between her mother and father. "Do you know that when you're in the infimary you don't get to bring your toys, you have to stay in bed all day, no swimming, no Sejith, and no bubblies?"

Ah, the real reason for Brencia's skittishness is revealed as she cries out to the world, "Wan-na pla-a-ay with-th Sejith!!" She collapses on the sand in a sobbing heap, much to T'rell's surprise. He leans upon an elbow, eyebrows raised to Kaeryn.

Kaeryn winces, mumbles quietly to T'rell, "Ooh, bad choice of words there, weren't they? Do you think he might leave the sands for a few minutes a day to see her, or would Quarith not allow that?" Gentle fingers reach out and brush at the mess of curls topping Brencia's head and pushing them away from her face. "I never really thought how hard it would be for *her* to have him away every day."

"Neither did I," The man admits. "She'll have to allow him out for eating and oiling, anyway. I can bring her along with me." He touches Brencia's shoulder lightly and is shrugged away. "Hey, 'Cia, you wanna come and help me oil Sejith this afternoon?" T'rell offers cajolingly. "And then I have to figure out," he adds, half under his breath and half to Kaeryn, "how in Faranth's name I'm supposed to lead drills with my dragon shacked up with Quarith."

"Can't someone else lead them sometimes? Maybe Quarith is more understanding than.." Kae pauses, cocking her head to the side, trying to form her words so they get the point across without insulting a queen or her rider. Nose wrinkles and she shrugs, "I just remember that when I was an apprentice, Serath wouldn't allow Annie to even leave the sands the entire time, save a few moments here and there."

T'rell shakes his head thoughtfully. "She'll have to let us out for Fall. With G'ron and Kolmeth out of commission, we've already got a hole in the wing," he points out. "And as good as Garai is, she can't lead the wing by herself." Duty weighs heavily on his shoulders with the unanticipated promotion.

"Then we'd better hope she's more understanding than most seem to be when they're on the sands," Kae reaches out to brush back an unruly bit of hair from T'rell's forehead. "I'm sorry I missed the clutching, especially since I was hoping to get a few sketches from it, but I just wasn't.." shoulders lift into a shrug, perhaps trying to pass the reasoning off on one of her ill feeling days.

"Not feeling well?" T'rell picks up on the supposed reason without doubt as to its sincerity. "Nothing's wrong, though, right?" Concern colors his tone.

Brencia's sobs gradually relax, meanwhile, until, sniffling quietly, she snuggles up against her mother's side, reaching up for a hug.

Kae frowns and shakes her head, "It wasn't really that, I just didn't feel like being there, I guess. I'm sorry, I know it's Sejith's clutch too and all, and I'll go see it, but.." the words trail off as she gathers her daughter into her arms and gives her a gentle squeeze. "But the idea of being there just didn't appeal to me."

"Oh." T'rell leans back on the sand, quiet for several moments.

"I really was planning to go," Kae attempts to explain her actions, or lackthereof, her voice is a little softer than usual as she cuddles their daughter in her arms, "but it's like I'd be intruding on something I shouldn't be, it just didn't feel right to me."

The ridiculousness of the idea strikes T'rell head on, and he chuckles as he eyes Kaeryn from the ground. "Sure, there are a couple hundred people watching, and you'd be intruding?" There must be more to it than that. "Kae," he considers openly, "I know you try, but weyr life is hard for you, isn't it?"

"It is," Kae admits with a frown, turning her head so she looks out toward that water and away from T'rell. "I've spent so many turns living here, before, when I was an apprentice, and now, but it isn't the same to me as it is to you. I feel things differently because... because I feel them alone, and you feel them with Sejith, if that makes any sense at all." A deep breathe cycles through her body and she shakes her head, "I just couldn't be there, it isn't that I didn't want to be a part of it, but I just couldn't."

Across the beach, T'rell reclines on the sand next to Kaeryn and their daughter. Keen eyes note Magnolth's arrival -- it's really not easy to miss the landing of a blue dragon, even across an expanse of beach -- but aside from a private acknowledgement of the event, it doesn't interrupt his conversation. "Look, if you're uncomfortable, you don't have to attend."

Kae nods, not quite confidently, retrieving the shells from her pocket and sorting through them, rolling them about in her hand while she thinks. "It shouldn't, though. I live here now, it's my home, things like this just shouldn't bother me, one would think," a soft sigh sounds and the harper shakes her head slightly.

"At the same time," T'rell sits up gradually, elbow first and then, with a grunt, to lean on his hands. "At the same time, I can see why you'd be uncomfortable. But there's no need to be." He smiles to Kaeryn, glancing down at the now quiet Brencia in her lap.

"Do you remember what it was like?" Kae queries, gently probing into his thoughts the only way she knows how, which means by asking. "Before Sejith, I mean. All your thoughts and emotions and worries, they were yours and no one else really quite got it? I know, you were young then, so it wouldn't be the same but, do you remember?" Shells are returned to her pocket and the sand is dusted from her hands, carefully so as to not get it on the sleeping child in her lap.

T'rell has to think about that. "Do I?" he asks himself. "Yes." He pauses, forehead creased as he continues to consider. "Yes, I do, but mostly because there are things that we don't always share. He'll pick up on what I'm feeling, but not why." He reaches out to stroke Kaeryn's long, golden hair, pushing its waves back along her shoulder.

"So you can understand the way I sort through things and think about things without someone that just knows when things aren't going the way I wish they would, or without knowing that something's bothering me," Kae speaks, but her words lack a certain sureness that's usually everpresent in her tone. "I can't, couldn't, ever understand, as much as I try, what it's like for you and Sejith, or for Saria and Quarith, or anyone else, because I've never experienced that. I can't feel what someone else feels, like your feeling Sejith's caring for Quarith, so I can't understand it, and maybe that's why it's so hard for me to fit in here. I try, but there's no way I'll ever understand it."

T'rell frowns. "But Kaeryn, we -- all of us, Brencia, Sejith, those silly firelizards of yours, and me -- we know when you're upset," he points out. "But we don't know why, all the time, and we don't know what we can do about it." He pulls a knee up, leaning an elbow on it as he regards this woman; "So it's not so different after all."

Kae shakes her head, not quite understood and trying to restate her meaning, somehow. "If I'd have gone to the clutching and watched, I'd have spent that time thinking about the night it happened," she holds up a hand, not wanting him to interrupt, "and I understand that it's just the way things are, but that doesn't mean I want to *think* about it. *I* can't truly understand the way it must feel for Sejith because of the way you feel about me, or the way it must feel for you because of how he cares for Quarith, and maybe that's just why it's hard for me to think about it. It's just easier...not to."

"I know that." T'rell states bluntly and somehow, at the same time, warmly. "I'm just not sure what I can do about it." He shrugs a shoulder helplessly. "I've tried to make it clear how I feel about you, and about Saria, and that there's no contest between you." He glances down, the black sands glittering. "And I'm pretty sure that you still think there is some kind of contest."

"It isn't intentional," Kae contests, holding her hand up again, trying to stop his train of thought before it gets hurtful. "I just try to understand how it must feel for you and for him, but I feel it so I guess I'll just have to accept it as it is. That's something I've never tried to do before, just take something because it's the way it's presented, but it is you I'm talking about so..." Fingers reach across the sand and brush across his arm, "I'm just trying to make it so you understand how it feels for me and why I feel like I don't fit in here."

T'rell's rough hand captures Kaeryn's fingers, holding them. "But you do fit in," he asserts quietly. "Or maybe I'm just being selfish."

"I'm *trying* to," Kae murmurs, squeezing his hand in return and giving him a small smile, "but I can't promise to always know why things happen as they do, or to never let it bother me. As hard as I try, I am only human."

T'rell glances up, his grin half-crooked. "So am I, no matter what superstitious hillholders tell you about dragonfolk."

Kae laughs, "You're no longer just human, you're a dad, which means, to 'cia, you're super-human." Fingers brush through their daughter's hair and the touch her rounded belly, "Just know that no matter how I react, I am trying, for all of us, and this jealousy thing, it isn't *always* there."

"I know you are. I just wish I knew how to help." There are aspects of weyr life that are always out of T'rell's control, and consequences happen. He takes a breath, as if to speak again, but instead just smiles and lets it out again.

"When I'm old and gray," Kae grins, running her fingers through his hair, "or, um, old and wrinkled, I'll get it all, or at least be accustomed to it, but until then, we'll just settle for the least number of surprises we can, alright?"

"Right." T'rell sounds just a little dubious as he glances down, then toward the water. "Um, about those surprises..." he begins awkwardly. "Think you can handle another?" Hopeful brown eyes seek acceptance from blue.

Kaeryn cocks her head to the side, a look of uncertainty touching her face, eyebrows raising in question. "That depends, do you think it's something I'm going to like?"

T'rell inhales, pauses, and shakes his head slowly. "No."

Blinking, rather slowly, Kae adjusts her position, one hand resting on the sand behind her and the other on her rounded stomach, and she takes a deep breath, "but it's something that you think I should know, right, so I guess I should hear it anyway."

"I'd rather tell you sooner than later." The bronzerider exhales audibly. "I don't think there's a good time, but the longer it goes, the worse it'll be for you, I have to guess." He steels his nerve, and then hesitates; he lifts her hand to kiss it. "Shells," he shakes his head, unable to get it out and darkly amused at the difficulty. "Just... promise me you won't doubt, Kae, that I love you."

Kaeryn watches as her hand is kissed, her face turning slightly pale as she obviously tries to determine exactly what's about to be said, and probably imagining the worst. "I know that you do, T'rell. It don't doubt that.."

T'rell wipes a hand over his mouth, hesitating only a moment longer. "Saria is pregnant." He probably doesn't need to say any more, but waits nervously for Kaeryn's reaction.

Kaeryn just continues to blink, as if she didn't actually hear what he'd just said, or is refusing to actually believe it. After all, that couldn't really be happening, could it? "She... you..?" Pink tongue slips across her lips and she shakes her head as it sinks in.

T'rell nods, inhaling long and painfully. "Yes. It's mine." There; it's out. At least that's the worst, and it's over. "From the flight. I-" He lets both their hands drop to the sand, but doesn't break the contact, and stops speaking. She knows how it happened; there are no excuses to be had.

T'rell's going to have another child, but this one won't be hers, an idea which is not in the least bit pleasant to this holdbred harper. Instinctively, Kae touches her hand to her own belly and rubs it lovingly. She makes an attempt at a 'brave face', giving him a weak smile, "Three children, you're family will be proud."

T'rell closes his eyes and rubs his temple. "Kaeryn..." He shakes his head slightly, despite the hangover. "*You* are my family."

"Right now, Brencia and I are your family," Kae agrees, nodding halfheartedly, "and this little guy or girl, but the other baby will be your family too. You're that child's.." words stop and she releases her breath, cradling her sleeping daughter closer to her face, "you're that child's father as well."

T'rell nods slowly. "Yes, that's true." Tenderly, he watches Brencia stir in Kaeryn's arms, the very beginnings of wakefulness.

"Ah well, what's done is done," Kae makes an attempt at dismissing the subject just like that before adjusting the wakening toddler so she sitting up in the sand between her mother and father, unaware of what's happening around her.

T'rell shifts position to face the ocean again, merely nodding with a solemn expression. Small wrinkles deepen at the corners of his mouth and eyes, the disquiet aging him.

Kaeryn releases a long breath in the effort required to quickly force herself up from the sand and to her feet, her skirts swirling around her and releasing the sand had gathered there. "Looking for shells, for this painting I'm doing, of the beach," she explains softly, walking toward the water, leaving her sandals to rest where she dropped them much earlier.

T'rell slips an arm around Brencia as the girl slips from sleep to wakefulness, and at the touch his frown diminishes, as if it could not stand to be near such a wonder. Still, he does not speak, but just pushes his daughter's curly brown hair out of her face while she rubs her eyes and looks up at him.

Kaeryn moves slowly, her bare toes occassionally damped by the rush of water that rolls ashore, but she doesn't seem to notice. Now and then, she pauses, bending carefully to study something in the sand, but generally just moves on, not bothering to collect anything. "Brencia will have another brother or sister, but they won't be mine. I know you didn't plan it, but how am I supposed to.. what am I supposed to do about it?" the words are spoken, not exactly loudly, but with enough volume for them to carry.

T'rell looks up at Kaeryn's words. "Nothing," he finally answers, too softly to carry at first. "Nothing." Repeated, the word is washed by the waves. The dragonman rises from the sand, lifting his daughter to rest against his shoulder, and walks toward the water's edge, toward his weyrmate. "Just try not to hold it against them."

"My babies, my 'cia and my little unknown child, they have to share their father, his love and his time," Kae whispers, taking another step down the beach, not minding the waves or the sand, just walking. "I knew I'd have to share you sometimes, but I didn't think that they would. It's 'normal' for weyrlife, I know."

T'rell stands at the water's edge, a post which Kaeryn, in her strolling, leaves gradually behind. "By coming to the Weyr, I gave up things," he says aloud. "In trade for Sejith, for the perqs and priviledges of riding a dragon, I give up freedom for duty, for the opportunity to expose myself and my dragon to Thread every time it falls over Istan soil." He watches the harper walk, speaking to her back. "I don't have any choice in that. Shells, I don't have any choice in drills, in sweeps, in having Sejith cooped up on the bloody hatching grounds for sevendays." Frustration seeps into his tone, and Brencia squirms; he lowers his voice to murmur to her, putting on a private smile just to settle her.

Kaeryn stops in her tracks, chin dropping toward her chest as her breaths become soft sobs at the words he speaks, feeling a harshness there regardless of whether it was intended or not. Curls tumble over her shoulders, covering her face and its lack of color and she doesn't push them away.

And yet his words continue, a rush of sentiment that has never been expressed and will never again be expressed. "I have very little control over my life. Everything is duty -- to my dragon, to the Weyr, to Pern." He takes a breath, smiling more genuinely into Brencia's eyes, tiny mirrors of his own. "Where I do have a choice, I think I've done pretty well, though." T'rell finally follows in Kaeryn's footsteps, pausing a pace behind her.

"I know," Kae whispers,tears slippin from her eyes and down her cheeks. "I'm free to make my own choices, they brought me here. It hasn't always been easy, but I don't regret being here because I love you, but.." Head is shaken as her fingers lift to brush away the tears, "we're as much of a family as anyone could be.."

T'rell closes the final step to bring all three together. His hand he rests on Kaeryn's shoulder, pushing silken locks back. "I may have given up the freedom to choose partners, but that doesn't mean I can't choose my family."

"I won't ask you not to be a good father," Kae offers with a soft sob that dares to negate her statment, reaching up to close her hand around his to keep him close.

Brencia is puzzled; her mother is crying. She reaches out from T'rell's arms. "Mommy sad?" The man squeezes Kaeryn's shoulder, an affirmation, as he moves close enough to let the little girl touch.

"And I know I don't have to ask you to be a good father to your own children," Kae continues, her sentences not quite making sense, but well enough to get the point across, for now. "I'm sorry, I know you love me, but this isn't...it's not easy for me, you know. And if it's from Quarith's flight, she can't be much behind me." Reason enough in itself to cause the harper some distress.

"I guess not." The rider hadn't given that a whole lot of thought yet. "She just told me yesterday."

"I shouldn't ask this, because I know it will probably upset you that I do, but I have to," Kae turns, blue eyes sparkling with unshed tears, "you'll be there when our child is born, won't you? Even if, well, you will, right?"

T'rell looks again at Brencia, watching her movements as she touches Kaeryn's cheeks with still-chubby fingers. "Yes, Kaeryn, I will be there," he promises, meeting her gaze unwaveringly.

Kaeryn squeezes his fingers with one hand and touches Brencia's face with the other, "I don't mean to take it this way, but it isn't exactly what I'd hoped for when dreaming of having a large family with you. That doesn't mean I can't accept it, and I know that, to me, our children will always be, as horrible as it sounds, my priority. That isn't fair to say to you or to ask you to feel the same way because they'll all be yours, and maybe I'll even love Saria's child because it's yours, and I'll try because they're your family too, but I can't make promises." A sigh accompanies her shrug. She tries.

T'rell finds a small smile. "I won't ask for any promises you can't give." He'd be a hypocrite if he tried; he realizes that much. "Are you alright?"

Kaeryn forces a smile to her face, but her eyes are sad, "I think this might be something that's going to take some time. I wish I could just turn and say I'm perfect and it doesn't give me an empty feeling in the pit of my stomach, but it does."

"I know." T'rell looks down at Kaeryn's feet, bare in the occasional flow of surf. "I never wanted to put you through this to begin with."

"We'll get through this," Kae mumbles softly, moving forward to lean into his form, looking for comfort in his touch. "It might not be easy for this small-family hold-bred girl, but I promise to do everything I can to make this easier for all of us."

T'rell slips his arm around Kaeryn's waist, and Brencia hooks her arms around her mother's neck, wiggly again after such serious adult-type discussion over her head. "I know you will, Kae." His trust asks nothing more than an effort; success does not need to be guaranteed.

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