T'rell (#5123)
A small fellow, his shoulders are broad, his hands well-calloused, and his form compact and fit. His dirt-brown eyes sparkle with mischief and humor to lend a joke to his short and wavy hair, which has become quite a remarkable shade of light grey. His newly-cleanshaven features are unlined except when he's laughing and are free and mobile with his expressions, such that all his five feet and four inches of height are alight with a juvenile and contagious spirit.
A new, rough wherhide jacket hangs stiffly on his shoulders over a plain shirt, his wingrider's knot slightly frayed at the edges but otherwise neat with its bronze strand winding unevenly through the orange and black of Ista. Work trousers end at sturdy brown boots, patched here and there but with several turns to go.
T'rell is 37 Turns, 6 months, and 6 days old.

Kae rests at her desk, feet propped up on the small stool nearby, a hide held gently in her hands, her blue eyes slowly scanning the words written across it. A small frown tugs the corners of her lips downward the further she gets into the letter, despite the sparkle that lights in her eyes. With these mixed emotions filling her face, she sets the hide aside and takes a deep breath.

T'rell knocks softly, quietly pushing the door open. Upon seeing Kaeryn at the desk, his shoulders relax and he smiles.

Giving T'rell a welcoming smile, Kae waves him inward, taking the moment to push the hide further up her desk as if trying to push it's contents away for a while. "Looks like today's working out to be a pretty dreary day, isn't it?" she notes softly, kicking her foot against the stool to push it further away from her.

"Dreary?" The man chuckles, some ash still dusting his shoulders despite the brushing he gave his jacket. "You could call it that." He steps over to where Brencia quietly naps, and she barely stirs at his light touch. After a moment, he completes his path to the bed, where he sits tiredly. "What's that?" he nods to the hide as it travels up her desk.

"Good news and bad news all rolled up into one," Kae replies, poking at the hide with her finger and giving T'rell a small smile. Before explaining further, her blue gaze does the usual 'checking to make sure he's alright after fall' shifting over his form. Satisfied there's nothing there that needs attention, she continues. "So, which part of it would you prefer to hear first?"

T'rell raises his eyebrows; that's about all the energy he's got left at the moment. "How about the good news first?" he pleads. "If I survive that, you can give me the bad news later."

"The good news is that I've been granted permission to continue my studies to become a DolphinSinger," Kae pauses for effect, her eyes sparkling brightly at the announcement, "and Master Atira herself is going to continue my training." Tanned fingers slip nervously through her hair, and, as an afterthought, she adds softly, "I didn't think they'd allow me to continue, the way I abandoned the Lady Rose and my teacher, not that I really felt I could make any other decision."

T'rell smiles, encouragement and pride in his eyes as he nods to Kaeryn. "That's great. Not like I ever had any doubt they'd let you, but I guess that's beside the point now." His glance slips to the desk briefly; then back to the harper. "That'll make you even busier than you already are, though. Are you going to do this full time *and* be Weyrharper and not go crazy with Brencia?" And me? Unasked, but still there; he knows he takes up Kaeryn's time.

Kaeryn takes a long, slow, deep breath before answering, the frown that was tugging at her lips now shifting into all-out look of unhappiness. "That's the bad news. See... Atira is at Ista Hold, and in order for me to study with her full time, I... I have to go stay at the Hall again." Pink tongue slips across her lips to dampen them as she pauses, letting words form in her mind before speaking them, "I need to be there to work with her.."

T'rell is obviously in denial, for his countenance remains even. "Well, that's not necessary. We can just take you there when you need to go." It's obvious.

Kaeryn drops her eyes to her hands, not willing to look at T'rell for fear that he'll see how unhappy she is over the arrangements, "I can't, T'rell. The dolphins don't always come around at the whim of myself or Atira. I need to be with them more than your schedule would allow me to go. And Bren going back and forth so much would..." Turning her head, she rests her gaze on their sleeping daughter.

T'rell frowns, then ducks his head, running a hand through his short, wavy hair. "The dolphins come around here," he insists, grasping at straws. "Couldn't she come stay here? The hall's not set up for children..." He looks aside to Brencia's crib, but doesn't look back at Kaeryn.

Kaeryn pulls her feet away from the stool and starts to get to her feet, but finds it's easier to just stay where she is. "I can't ask her to do that, love, to rearrange her life to come *here* for one student, when she's so many at the hold already. I know, it seems as though we've just come, and I've to go again, and Bren," she stops, not saying anything more, just sits in silence, not knowing what else to say.

T'rell hooks a hand around the back of his neck, resting his elbow on his knee as he leans forward on the edge of the bed. He studies the carpeted floor, his jaw working just slightly as he rolls the unpleasant notion around in his head. After several long minutes he looks up at Kaeryn, tired. "There's no way?"

"If you'd rather," Kae begins to make an offer, the words getting stuck in her throat even as she tries to say them, "Bren could stay with her, and I'll come back on restdays. I don't want to take her from you..." her voice cracks and she trails off, only quietly adding, "I don't want to take *me* from you either."

"No." T'rell's voice in his rejection of the suggestion is as hard as it is quiet for just that one, brief moment; until he closes his eyes, shakes his head, and breathes deeply. "Faranth, Kaeryn." Empty of words. He stands again, covering the two steps between them in the blink of an eye, and sinks down onto the stool she'd been using to rest her feet on. "I should be more understanding, shouldn't I?"

Kae doesn't speak, dropping her gaze so it studies the floor beneath her bare feet, only then allowing the tears that have formed in her eyes to stream down her cheeks. Fingers once again enter her golden curls, but this time they pull the locks over her shoulder in an effort to hide her face and hide the tears that are streaking across it. "I would stay.." except it's what she's been working turns for.

"Shh." He pushes back her bright curls and gently wipes Kaeryn's tears from her cheeks, gazing into her eyes. "I have no right to ask you." T'rell realizes. "You've been working for this for turns." Still, the smile he musters is sad.

"Oli can help me with Brencia, and you can stay with us every night if Sejith doesn't mind the visits," Kae reasons the best she can, trying to make the situation the best it possibly can be. "I'm not asking you to leave your life here behind, I know you can't, and I'm not asking..." she shakes her head, not sure what she is or isn't asking, and reaches her hands out to take his into them.

T'rell squeezes Kaeryn's hands tightly. "You're only asking what you have every right to ask," his plain brown gaze, open and intense, searches her eyes. "And I never thought it'd be so hard to let you." A chair and stool being inadequate for an embrace, he stands, urging her up and into his arms. "I guess I don't tell you this much, but I love you, Kaeryn. And I'll miss you, even if you're only next door."

Kaeryn allows herself to be pulled up and into his embrace, her arms slipping around his neck and her face burying into the crook of his shoulder. "I love you too, T'rell," she mumbles softly, closing her eyes and falling silent.

T'rell holds Kaeryn tightly for a long moment, then releases her with a tender kiss on her cheek. "Being selfish, how long do I still have you here?"

Kae steps back, brushing her hand over each of her cheeks, and gives T'rell a small smile, "I'm to be settled in there by the beginning of spring. So, about..." her fingers wiggle as she does a little calculating in her head, "enough time, I guess. We're only about a third of the way through the winter."

"It'll have to do, anyway." T'rell's touch on Kaeryn's shoulder invites her to follow him as he moves toward a seat on the bed. "And then they'll start getting tired of us over at the Hold."

"Don't suppose we could get the pair of you posted as the watchrider pair for the hold, could we?" Kae grins as she follows him toward the bed and settles down beside him. "I don't think my room is large enough for you and Sejith though, even if I am one of the more senior Journeymen that will be at the hall."

T'rell chuckles softly, fatigue seeping through. "Can't you just see the poor guy trying to squeeze himself in through the Hold doors, though?"

"I'll never have a room as big as yours though, so I doubt digging a window out would do much good for any of us," Kae replies as she slips further up on the bed and kneels behind T'rell, tugging gently at the ashy jacket. "If you get this thing off, we'll see about loosening up these shoulders, while we make plans. Deal?"

T'rell regards Kaeryn, smiling and yet slightly shaking his head in wonderment; tracing a single lock of her hair as he places it behind her ear, he then shrugs his jacket off, tossing the stiff and creaking garment over toward his crate of gear.

Kaeryn's fingers gently trace over T'rell's shoulders, feeling for the tense muscles before begging to massage them with a slow but effective motion of her well trained hands. "I plan to come back here as soon as my training is over," she explains, her voice as soothing as her touch, "so I suppose keeping my room here wouldn't be a bad idea. Especially since Bren and I still don't have wings..."

"That would be convenient. Can't you just grow them?" T'rell wants to know. "Ah-" he winces as Kaeryn's amazingly effective fingers find a bruise. "How long will the training be?"

"Can't you just move to a ground weyr?" Kae counters, only half-teasingly as she carefully moves her fingers inward toward his neck, working along each side of his spine. "The training will take as long as... it takes me to be promoted? Or to finish my research, whichever."

T'rell leans forward, stretching out the relaxing muscles of his back as Kaeryn works on them. "Ground weyrs come with too much responsibility," he jokes back. "And Sejith's bronze, not gold." With the harper behind him, his gaze travels to Brencia's crib at a light sound from the infant as she shifts in her sleep. "What's your research all about?"

"Linguistics," Kae replies, leaning forward to plant a kiss on the back of his head which causes only a temporary pause in her attentions to his tense muscles. "Studying the change in the language between the dolphins and what they learned from us when they first came to Pern, and the language we speak now." The fingers of one hand gentle glide down his back, along the spine, and back up again, "Just wish, sometimes, that... well, that we had a 'collective' home, and not two, or three, different places." Pausing once again, she leans forward and wraps her arms around his neck, "Can I ask you something?"

T'rell glances back over his shoulder, curious. "Sure." He covers her hands with his, keeping her there where he can enjoy her soft warmth.

"I'm not trying to push, or make you feel uncomfortable, or, for Faranth's sake, make you run, but," Kae rests her head against his shoulder and squeezes him gently. "If you weren't a rider, do you think that we'd be handfasted? I know you can't, and I'm not asking you to, but I was just wondering.."

T'rell just blinks thoughtfully. "I don't know," he responds. "I guess I hadn't thought much about it, seeing as it's not really done 'round here." He strokes Kaeryn's arms unconsciously as he considers. "Probably," he concludes, surprising even himself with his ability to entertain such an idea, and laughs. "And that's not to be repeated to my wingmates or they'd dangle me from the Star Stones by my toenails."

"I know it isn't done around here, I wasn't asking that you, ok, I don't know what I was asking but..." Kae lifts her shoulders, shrugging, as she leans back, resting her weight on her feet so she can return her attentions to his tender muscles. "I was just wondering, that's all."

"I keep forgetting, I've been here so long that I don't even think about what you might expect, Kae." T'rell turns to half-face Kaeryn, disregarding the massage for the moment; that can resume in a minute, with luck. "Is handfasting important to you?"

Kaeryn lets her hands rest against T'rell's back, feeling the warmth of his skin through the shirt that covers it, and just sits there, studying his face quietly for a long moment, searching for a way to reply. Finally, she just shakes her head, unable to really find a way to respond. "Nae." Oh woman of many words.

Words, words. Who needs words when actions will suffice? T'rell twists enough to stop the harper's mouth with a loving kiss. When they separate (everyone needs to breathe sooner or later), he studies Kaeryn's clear blue eyes. "You're the only woman who could ever get me to, you know." He smiles crookedly.

"I guess it's hard for me to believe," Kae explains, apologetically, as she reaches her hand up to brush the tips of her fingers across his cheek. "Jer and I.. we were together for 8 turns, and I thought that was permanent, but it wasn't, so when I think about us, I think that it might just be, but..." Her eyes stay fixed on his for a moment longer before she tears her gaze away and continues, "the idea of it not being..."

"Permanent. That's a strange thing to say about weyr life," T'rell quirks an eyebrow, glancing down at the coverlet as he strokes her fingers, feeling each curve of her hand as if treasuring the touch. "And I know that's not what you want to hear, but it's the truth." He falls silent, swallowing once. "I can't promise that I'll always be here. I can promise that I'll always love you." He lifts his eyes, deep and dark, to Kaeryn's.

"It's more than I should expect," Kae admits quietly, squeezing his hand softly before pulling her own away to return her gentle touch to his shoulders, where her fingers just rest against the skin of his neck. "One of those things a girl should expect when she offers her heart to a 'rider, right?" As the pads of her fingers trace light circles over his skin, she adds, "I know it seems like I'm just asking you to tell me that it'll always be like this, and maybe I am, but when I think about the future, for all of us, it just seems right. We're...." she shakes her head, unable to come up with a word to fit what she's thinking.

"Family?" T'rell suggests the completion that seems to fit.

Kaeryn shakes her head, "No. I mean, we are, but..." Giving up on the massage, she shifts her position so they can actually look at each other, her hand resting lightly against his thigh. "I think, well, that I loved you long before..." her gaze shifts to Brencia's sleeping form, then shifts back to T'rell's eyes, "long before we were family."

T'rell shakes his head. "We've always been family, we just didn't know it yet," he decides. "You were always there, whenever I needed a place to go..." His mind executes a final turn in the circle to bring him back to the topic that started the discussion. "I guess I'll have to count on that again, what with this place getting lonely come spring."

"I guess we're just going to have two homes for a while, aren't we?" Kae curls up, resting her upper body against his, her head against his shoulder. "It won't be the same, not having you there at night, you know. It's going to be hard, and Bren, she's not going to understand."

"I'll be there enough," T'rell promises softly, draping an arm around her shoulder. "And soon you'll be a dolphinsinger." He kisses the top of her golden head lightly; "It'll be worth it, just a little inconvenience for a while."

"You'd better, I mean, you do realize she'll be walking and talking soon, right? Can't have you missing out on that..." or having this little harper curling up in his arms at night... Kae points out the obvious, leaving the rest unspoken, for now. "

T'rell startles. "She will," he realizes. "You'll just have to tell her that she's only allowed when I'm there," he instructs Kaeryn teasingly as he leans his head on hers, resting.

"I'll try, but she's our child, which means she probably won't listen," Kae teases him back, her mood obviously brightened from the earlier worry she was feeling. "If you aren't around enough, we'll bug you until you come for us. Too bad *I* can't hear Sejith, or you'd be called every time we miss you."

T'rell chuckles quietly, his hand lightly rubbing Kaeryn's arm. "Great. My mother always said she hoped my brother and I had kids just like us." He pauses. "And I don't think it was because we were really *good*."

*** fade to black ***

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