Harper's Area (#4056)

Marius hums softly to himself as he opens the door to the Harper's area and moves in. A slight smile appears on his face when he sees Kaer, "Heyla."

Kae sits poised on the edge of a stool, one foot propped up against the lowest rung, the other flat on the ground to keep her steady. A paintbrush is held gently between her fingers, another behind her ear, and she's slowly working on the canvas before her when she hears a familiar voice. Paintbrush is dropped, causing a small blue smear on the bottom of the canvas. "Hi!"

Marius moves over and leans against the wall nearest to the improvised workspace. His eyes twinkle slightly, "Now this looks familiar." His voice softens and takes them back, "You remember the old days? You were still finishing up the murals in the Main Hall." A chuckle finds its way to his lips, "I remember we had to scrub the floor for days after you finally finished..."

"I remember not sleeping for days, not eating for even more, and being covered from head to toe in paint," Kae admits with a grin as she reclaims the brush she dropped against the canvas, pausing just long enough to scowl at the blue splatter at the bottom. "And I remember being horrified that it wouldn't be good enough."

Marius mms softly, "Oh, aye. I remember that." He moves over and gently rests his hand on her shoulders, his finger searching out the tight muscles and kneading the knots away, "And remember coming out of the Archives after candlemarks of scribing to find you still working." He shakes his head slightly, "I don't know how you managed."

Kaeryn almost drops the brush again, but this time she manages to gently place it on the table alongside the others. After a deep sigh, she allows her eyes to slip closed so she can just enjoy the soothing feeling of the massage. "Will, actually. He would bring me food, fill me up with klah, and keep me company while I worked through the night, and I'd watch him stumble past on his way to classes the next day." When he hits a particularly tender spot, she gasps softly and then grins, "I think you found the source of all of my pain, right there."

Marius obliging works on the offending area until the muscles seem to relax. He pulls his hands away, pausing just for a moment to place a kiss on an exposed section of Kaer-neck. Afterwards Mar resumes his place again the wall, "Listen, I wanted to come by and talk about what happened the other night..."

Kaeryn's eyes flutter open at the kiss to her neck, but close again at the mention of their most recent visit. Paint splattered fingers reach up and brush a stray curl out of her eyes, and she forces herself to turn and face him, if not completely.

A slight smile slips over Mar's features, "I think we both know that this isn't going to work." That damn timing thing again. He takes a deep breath, "T'rell...you two have a child together. The things I said the other night..." Now it's Mar's turn to look away as he launches into the speech that sounds false, even to him, "I was travel-worn, and tired. I /do/ love you, but..."

Kaeryn's shoulders slump forward as Marius' intent for the moment's visit becomes clear, and she sits there, eyes still closed, taking long, slow, deep breaths. After what seems to be an endless moment of silence, her pale pink lips part and words, however quiet and shaky they are, manage to be spoken. "But you... you don't want.. don't want me anymore.." Her eyes finally open, showing the pinkness of eyes that have shed many tears over the last few days.

"Flame, shells and shards." Mar closes the distance between them in less time that it takes to speak the epithet. His voice drops, sweet baritone almost becoming harsh for a moment, what with all of the emotion behind the words, "No! No, that's not it at /all/."

Kaeryn turns her back to him, her jaw clenching tightly shut, as she tries to control the emotions that, once again, threaten to overpower her senses. The paintbrush tucked behind her ear is flicked forward, with a smooth motion of her right hand, dipped in black paint and applied to the canvas, forming shaky lines and curves on what had been turning out to be a nice landscape. "I can't turn these... I can't turn these feelings off again, not now," she whispers as she dips the brush into the paint again.

Marius moves forward until his chest is almost touching her back. A hand reaches out and stays the brush wielding hand. His voice is hardly anything more than a whisper in her ear, "I never meant to cause you this much pain...or so many tears."

Kaeryn lets the brush fall into the paint bottle without moving her shaking hand away from his. "I don't want you to give up on me," she whispers softly, shaking her head. "But I don't want to have to choose either... I love you. Both... but the idea of you just walking away and wanting to be the way we've always been," she takes a deep breath and shakes her head again, "I don't know if I... if I can."

A loud shrieking sound comes from Kae's room.

"Kaeryn?" T'rell, looking helpless, emerges with a squalling, squirming daughter in his arms, kicking for all she's worth. "Help?"

Marius takes a breath, the action almost painful by his closeness to Kaer. He looks over as T'rell walks in, indescribable emotion fluttering across his face as he stands up once more. A (relieved?) smile is sent to Kaer, "I'll come back later."

T'rell halts, shifting Brencia to try to get her to stop squirming; it doesn't work. "Oh, sorry, Marius. Didn't realize you were here. Uh.. Don't leave on our account." His tone is not quite as friendly as it was the last time they met, but it's not cold, either. Brencia, on the other hand, is just plain loud.

Kae releases a soft, painful sounding breath from her lungs, and she slips from the stool to her feet, giving Marius a confused smile and nodding to him, "Sorry, but I have to.." she motions toward the screaming infant and moves over to take her from T'rell's arms.

Marius gives a terse nod to the rider, his own demeanor slightly chilled. He then raises his hands slightly to Kaer, "I understand. I never meant to interrupt." Another nod as Mar seems to run out of words, "I'll be back later."

T'rell frowns slightly after the other harper, then shakes his head and gives Kaeryn a grateful smile. "See, I knew it was just you she wanted." Almost immediately, their daughter calmed down, though she still squirms as she searches for a nipple.

T'rell shrugs. "Sorry," he spreads his arms helplessly. "I even tried changing her..." With a descriptive pantomime of dealing with an unpleasant-smelling object, he grimaces. "Maybe she could learn to go ::between:: like the dragons eventually do."

"Hopefully not in my lifetime," Kae replies blandly, her tone unsteady and a little harsh, almost immediately giving him an apologetic smile for her foul mood. "Looks like she's not the only one that's cranky," she notes softly as she tucks her feet up under the chair she's seated in.

T'rell pauses, stops pantomiming and kneels next to Kaeryn's chair, resting a hand on her shoulder lightly with a crooked, fond smile. "That's okay. At least you're not as loud as she is about it." He knocks against an ear as if testing to make sure it still works.

A line is traced gently along Bren's cheek and down her jawline as Kae admires the infant in her arms, calming herself slowly as she does. "I never thought it possible to love anything so much," she whispers softly and brushes her fingers over their daughter's head.

T'rell nods quiet agreement. "Neither did I." His admiring gaze travels from Brencia up to Kaeryn's face, which he studies with some concern. "Are you alright?" His hand, still on her shoulder, squeezes lightly, starting to massage at some of the tension there.

Kae shakes her head, and lifts her eyes to meet T'rell's, giving him a somewhat forced smile in response. "I don't know if I can do this," she tells him quietly, her smile fading into the frown that has been threatening to appear for several minutes. "I can't just... I can't hurt him, I can't send him away because I'm afraid he'll never come back."

"Kae," T'rell breathes quietly, standing up to lean on the chair's back by her shoulder. "How long have you been friends? If he really cares for you, he'll be back." He kisses her cheek tenderly, it being the most convenient place from where he's standing. "Granted, it may take him a while, but he will."

"A long time," Kae nods her head, and shrugs at the same time, the shrug causing Brencia to whine her complaint but she immediately quietens as soon as Kae sits still again. "He's been like... he's been my Sejith, I guess you could say. Always there when I need him, always. If I had trouble with my studies, he'd stay up late and help. If I had trouble in love, he'd talk it over with me and help me fix it. If I was scared..." She tilts her head back to look up at him and shakes her head, "but now I'm scared. Scared to lose my best friend."

T'rell considers, for a long time, just resting on Kaeryn's shoulder and reaching calloused fingers down to caress Brencia's arm as she suckles. "I don't know what to say, except that the way I think of it, you can't lose a friend that easily."

"I'm sure you just love hearing about it constantly as well," Kae gives him a small, apologetic smile. "I'm sorry, it's just really difficult for me. All I can do is just hope that you understand."

T'rell nods quietly. "I'm trying," he admits with a dubious grin. "I'd rather hear about it than not hear about it, anyway."

As Bren slowly drifts off to sleep, Kae adjusts her daughter's position in her lap, and quietly watches her in all of her innocence and beauty. "I would have told you the night he said something, but I didn't want to upset you, didn't want to make you worry."

T'rell chuckles softly, a low rumble in his throat. "You're too thoughtful for your own good," he concludes, crossing behind the chair to lean against the table facing Kaeryn and Brencia. "But don't you worry about me if you've got something on your mind. You've got plenty to think about without having to do it all by yourself, eh?" He raises an eyebrow questioningly; he's right, right?

"It's just part of me being me," Kae gives him a small grin and shakes her head. "It's always been easier for me to take everything on my own shoulders and heart, than to burden someone else with the weight of it all. And I do believe you have plenty to think about as well, don't you think?" Her tongue slips across her dry lips in an attempt to dampen them, which gives her an idea, "Do you think you'd be interested in an early dinner?"

T'rell gives a grin. "I'm always ready for dinner," he points out. "Do you want me to go bring something in, or would you rather get out?" With a gesture, he indicates that one is as easy as the other for him, at least.

Kae slowly gets to her feet, careful to not bounce the sleeping infant around as she does, and nods her head in the direction of the door. "Preferably out, I think."

At the door a few steps before Kaeryn, T'rell gives a sweeping bow as he opens it for her. "Out you go, then."

"I'm not sure I'm ready to even imagine what it will be like with more than one of these," Kae points at Bren and gives T'rell a mischevious grin before slipping out the door.

Craft Areas (#4532)

T'rell raises both eyebrows as he follows. "More than one," he asks, bemused.

Kae just lifts her shoulders into a shrug as she continues to walk into the direction of the food.

South Caverns (#7009)

T'rell rubs his beard with thumb and forefinger consideringly.

"Are you telling me that you, he of the huge family, doesn't like that idea?" Kae glances over her shoulder at the trailing 'rider and gives him a wink.

T'rell acts startled as he meets Kaeryn's blue eyes innocently. "Who, me?"

"And here I thought you were getting used to the idea of being a dad," Kae teases, tossing her head in a runner-like manner so that her curls bounce behind her, and wanders onward.

Living Cavern (#4190)

"Don't get me wrong," T'rell was saying as he followed Kaeryn in. "I'm all for it." He passes her with a mischievous wink every bit a match for the one she'd given him, and leads the way to the buffet.

"Glad to hear it..." Kae lets her words trail off as she moves toward a table instead of toward the food, since her arms are a little full for a tray of food at the moment. As she settles down into the seat, Brencia lets out a cry of protest, but when her mother touches a finger to her cheek, she resumes the quiet and sleeping.

Deann sits at one table, working her way through a meatroll and some klah, when her latest speculation becomes that conversations she only hears part of are usually strange. She nods politely, if a bit lazily, towards the two, not bothering to break into their talking, likely because she and babies don't mesh terribly well.

T'rell grabs a loose tray left by some lazy drudge, putting it to good use as he fills a couple of plates somewhat haphazardly. With a finishing touch of one of the pitchers of juice and a pair of mugs and utensils, he carries his masterpiece of a meal for two back to the table. He nods in return to Deann's quiet greeting, offering a smile. "Afternoon," he summarizes while removing items from the tray to the table.

"Planning on making sure I eat *something*, aren't you?" Kae grins up at T'rell and motions at the filled plates he carried to the table. "Thank you," she adds quietly, the appreciation for the meal evident both in her voice and in her eyes. "It's always easier to actually get food when we're together, have you noticed that? I haven't yet mastered the art of juggling her and food at the same time."

T'rell hmms thoughtfully. "Juggling babies is an art," he agrees. "Juggling food *and* babies, now that'd be worth watching..." He takes a seat abruptly, aimiably offering to pour. "Juice?"

Deann looks faintly surprised, responding automatically with a startled, "Afternoon." She bites her lower lip, considering something, evidently, then seems to reach a conclusion. "Um...I could hold her for a little bit, if you'd like," she offers quietly. She's uncertain with children, but she can deal if it helps. "I'm Deann, by the way."

"Juice." Kae repeats, wrinkling her nose up in distaste at her 'beverage of choice' for the past turn. "I'm going to turn into a redfruit, I'm almost positive. I must have caused a shortage of the stuff *somewhere* on Pern," the complaints are offered in good spirits, and she nods her head. "Yes please."

T'rell says, "I could spike it if you'd rather. Might give Bren some interesting dreams," the rider suggests as he fills the mug. "Hey, there's an offer, Kae. Hands free to eat for a change?" He smiles to Deann. "By the way, glad to meet you. I'm T'rell, Sejith's rider, and here we have Harper Kaeryn and Brencia." Putting down the pitcher, he gestures introductions."

Kae scowls playfully at her table-mate, and shakes her head, "That's all I need, a dizzy infant. Of course, at least she doesn't walk yet, right?" A sip is taken from the mug, which is given a scowl as well, before the harper gives Deann a genuine smile and a nod, "Good Evening, Deann."

Deann smiles nervously, oddly timid. "Nice to meet you, harper...rider. I'm not terribly good with babies...but...I won't drop her, and I'll try to seem friendly," she murmurs, setting down mug and meatroll.

T'rell shrugs equably. "So far, she's fast asleep, so it shouldn't be too hard -- if her mom can bring herself to trust another person yet." He winks to the harper, lightly teasing.

"I have let someone other that myself, and you, hold her, thank you very much," Kae tilts her head upward so that she looks down her nose at T'rell in an attempt at snobbery. To Deann, she grins and motions her over, "she's sleeping, and is usually very well behaved, unless she's hungry. She's just eaten, though."

Deann creeps towards mother and child, pulling old healer training out of memory for the proper way to hold a child. "So...just hold her and don't jostle her?" she inquires, nervousness and unusual anticipation warring in her expression.

"That should do it," T'rell encourages Deann. "And try not to sneeze too loudly." Unconcerned, he tears open a fresh roll, adding butter.

"Have a seat, I'll show you," Kae smiles encouragingly toward the younger woman, and nods her head in the direction of the seat beside her.

Deann sits hesitantly down, watching the sleeping girl more than her mother. She slowly extends her arms for a brief baby-passing session. "I think I remember enough from...from earlier things."

Striding in from the bowl and surveying the scene before her gives Kita time to pause. Behind her, the dwindling light of the sun illuminates her firey hair, sparkling the slight bits of dust swirling off her leathers. A small smile crosses her lips as she sees the fairly new parents, the child, and someone she doesn't know with the baby. Still smiling and not quite ready to interrupt the proceedings yet, Kita finally finshes her journey and makes her way to the klah pot.

"Don't worry, she won't bite," Kae gently points out the little fact, since her daughter *doesn't* have teeth, yet. The infant is gently passed from her mother's arms to Deann's, where Bren squirms slightly before wrapping the tiny pink fingers of one of her hands around the fabric of Deann's tunic.

Deann laughs silently at the reminder, then all concentration goes to supporting the infant. Remember, always support the head, the tip coming from murky depths of memory. She barely suppresses a giggle as the girl grabs her tunic. "Ah, so you like the color red, little one?" she murmurs gently.

T'rell chuckles. "See? she's attached to you already." It would take a lot to break that child's grip, in fact. He enjoys a bite of his roll; "Rolls are good today. Maybe we should come early more often, get 'em fresher this way."

Kaeryn hugs Marius! Marius gives you a bearhug back.

"As soon as *you* convince your daughter to pick a regular hunger scedule, we'll start coming earlier," Kae laughs as she thoughtfully picks a piece of the roll apart and pops it into her mouth.

Kryll suddenly blinks in from ::between:: and let's out a strangled warble. Is it possible that he doesn't like that cold, black place any more then 'pets'?

T'rell glances over the top of his mug at Kaeryn. "Well, now I've got incentive." He would've, no problem, had he only known. Of course.

Kita removes her jacket, draping it over the back of a chair. Underneath she wears a simple green sleeveless top, suitable to the harsh Istan summers. The klah mug is curled protectively to her body, as the brownrider sits in the chair with her jacket, appraising the goings on. "How old is she now?" she asks quietly into the room, her eyes still smiling at the child.

T'rell, the proud father, grins to Kita. "Three and a half months." Involved with his meal and with the conversation, he completely misses Marius' entrance.

Kaeryn nods in agreement with T'rell's reply as she continues to pick apart the piece of bread she holds in her hands. Thoughtful tearing, chewing, and swallowing keeps her quite occupied when her arms are baby-free, you see.

Deann smiles at the conversation, barely hearing it, barely sees more people entering. She's still making sure she doesn't accidentally break the kid, although she doesn't think the 'you break it, you buy it' policy applies here. "You really want this button, don't you?" she murmurs teasingly to the baby, daring to lightly run a finger over the softly forehead.

Marius peers around as he comes in out of the rain, partially drenched. The sopping Harper hardly seems related to his normally comfortable looking self as moves over by one of the cook fires and tries to dry himself off.

Kita's eyebrows raise at the answer, thoroughly impressed as adults are prone to do when regarding a baby's age. "3 and a half months? Wow, she's grown..." After leaning forward in her chair slightly to get a better look, the rider sits back, plonking her booted feet up onto the table in front of her. A bad habit picked up from Elle.

T'rell nods agreeably. "That she has. They tell me she'll get even bigger before she's done."

Kita listens politely to T'rell's statement, then quickly smothers a laugh as she realises what he just said. "Ah...I hope so, T'rell, if she's to grow up to be a Harper or rider. Can't imagine a baby holding onto neckridges or singing scales now, can you?" she asks, throwing in a wink to take any harm from the flippancy of her words. "Yes..she should get much bigger before she's done." A small giggle is badly smothered once more into her klah mug. Besotted fathers *sigh*...

Now that Kae's roll has been completely shredded, and about half of it has actually been eaten, she pushes the plate away and reclaims the mug filled with the juice she just proclaimed a dislike for. After a long drink from it, which empties the mug completely, she pushes her chair back and gets to her feet. "I think I want a piece of fish," she comments to those at the table before turning and walking toward the fire and the food, where she spots Marius again. "Mar?" she calls out softly as she walks up beside him.

Deann is almost a statue, hardly moving, though close observation might reveal her to be rocking back and forth slightly, and a keen ear might hear some tune being hummed under her breath.

T'rell chuckles at the notion. "She's been singing already, but I don't think you could call it scales..." He cringes dramatically as he picks up his mug again.

The mass of blue trouse and wet hair manages to get rid of most of the excess water. Enough so that his hair only hangs in long strands in his face instead of dripping all over the place. Marius pushes most of it from his face as he turns to face Kaer, "Aye, it's me." A wry grin twists at his lips, "Sodden, to be sure, but it's me..."

Kita shoots Kaeryn a delighted glance. She is the Harper here, after all. "Really?" Seeing she is busy, Kita directs her glance towards T'rell. Her delighted gaze falters however as she spies his grimace. "Ah...I guess you don't really like the sounds she makes?"

"Here, let me," Kae motions for him to stay where he is for a moment, not like he was leaving or anything, and disappears into the kitchens for a moment. When she returns, a freshly cleaned and folded towel is held in her arms, which she unfolds and drapes around his shoulders. "Annly usually has a few towels handy, for emergencies."

Marius gives Kaer a grateful smile as she returns. He briskly towels himself off, then makes a face, "Bloody storm crept up on me." He glances back to T'rell and Bren, then motions with a jerk of his head, "Go on. I'll just get something warm inside of me..."

T'rell's grimace melts into a smile. "Eh, it's not the sounds so much as the volume." Glancing back toward the hearth, he suddenly notices the wet Marius -- which explains why it's taking so long for Kaeryn to get her fish, which was the last thing he paid attention to. Without a word, he turns back to Kita, gesturing to Brencia, in Deann's arms and still miraculously quiet. "Have you properly met yet?"

Kita removes her booted feet from the table, her eyes bright and polite as she senses an introduction about to be in order. "No, I don't believe we have...."

"It's fine," Kae shakes her head, showing that she isn't in a hurry to return to her supper, but she does pick up a plate and put a few pieces of the fish onto it. "Join me, or us, I guess, for a bite then? You don't have to, but you can," the invitation is offered, and her shoulders lift into a shrug as she reaches out her hand to touch his shoulder lightly. "If not, then after dinner?"

"Then, Kita, Djarreth's rider," T'rell starts formally, "Meet Brencia."

Kita stands up to bow formally, totally caught up in the tone T'rell used. Just before the action is implemented, Kita freezes, her smile fading from her face. Slowly she turns her head out to the bowl, her eyes growing wider by the minute. "I...oh no...I have to go...now..I'm terribly sorry..." Grabbing her jacket on the way past, Kita bolts for the exit. "Oh," she pauses, waving to the girl. "Well met Brencia! We'll talk soon!" And with a flash, she is gone.

Marius gives Kaer a slight smile and a wink, "I'm not sure I'd be welcome at that table. We'll talk, later." He gives her another smile, then fetches a plate for himself and deposits some fish thereon.

T'rell watches the brownrider flee, startled; not that this sort of thing isn't usual around the weyr. Ah, well, if help is needed, he'll know soon enough, and meanwhile he's got dinner to eat. "So, Deann, how long have you been around here?"

Kaeryn frowns slightly, and nods her head, turning to head back to the table, but pauses and touches his shoulder again, "Marius? You know, you're always welcome, wherever I am." With that, she moves back over to the table and settles down into her chair, giving Marius another sad look as she does.

Deann is just the faithful living cavern crib, even though she's the one scared to death of babies. She manages not to jump when addressed, answering, somewhat sheepishly, "Um, about three months, I think. I kinda lost track of time..."

"Easy to do, when it flies so fast," T'rell replies, welcoming Kaeryn back to the table with a smile. Then he glances curiously around, and locating Marius at another table entirely, he queries, "Did you invite him over?"

Marius watches Kaer go, following her with his eyes. When she returns to her table, they slide over to meet T'rells for a brief moment, then he turns away. A plate is taken from the pile and Mar makes himself busy fixing himself some food.

Kae inclines her head just enough for it to be a nod, and turns her attention to the food that she carried back to the table, using a fork to pick the meat from the bone. "Doesn't think he's welcome," she replies softly, her voice and eyes both showing her unhappiness at the idea.

Deann can't help glancing towards the man who came in soaked. "Is he another harper?" she asks absently, shifting the child minutely to what is, hopefully, more comfortable for both of them. Her humming picks up again, an old lullaby her mother taught her.

T'rell raises his eyebrows, a mostly unreadable expression. Taking the opportunity, he nods to Deann, his tone conversationally bland. "Yes, an old friend of Kae's." A moment or two passes before he finally shrugs to Kaeryn. "If he'll come, I won't chase him away."

Marius finishes loading up his plate, then slides onto a bench of a table not too far from the others. As a result, he just barely catches T'rell's last remark. A slight smile twists his lips, but he just shrugs and starts in on his food.

Meat is slowly picked, piece by piece, away from the bone of the fish, though Kae disregards it as soon as she pulls it off, dropping each piece to the plate as she does. "I don't think so," she replies to T'rell with a shake of her head before giving Deann a smile, "You know, if you're ever bored, you can always come keep an eye on her so I can work."

The lullaby drifts off into silence, Deann so absorbed that she isn't embarrassed by singing in front of two harpers as she normally would. Kaeryn gets a thoughtful look before she answers, "I...think I'd like to, although I'm not sure how much longer I'll be about. I'm trying to decide on a craft before I get much older." Yes, De, the wizened crone all of twenty turns.

T'rell tears his attention away from Kae's food -- which is being very much picked and not much consumed. "Seems to me you might try harpering," he suggests to Deann, pointing out, "She's a tough audience, and she liked your singing." Looking at Brencia, a pleased little child as she is, a quiet smile forms despite other tension.

"The weyr is actually a good place to be if you want to find out where you belong," Kae notes quietly, giving Deann a supportive smile as she pushes the plate away, leaving the meat on it, uneaten. A glance is given in Mar's direction, followed by a sigh, and her attention is turned to the empty mug sitting on the table before her.

Marius spares the group sitting at the table one more glance, then shoves his own plate back in exasperation. He stands up and walks over until he's standing almost directly behind Kaer. He nods to the three of them and a smile is sent Deann's way, "Your singing was very lovely. However, if I might steal away Kaer for a few minutes...we need to talk." His eyes find T'rells, "If you don't mind, Rider?"

T'rell studies Marius for a few seconds, his gaze direct, and with an almost imperceptible nod, turns to offer Kaeryn, "I'll look after Brencia here."

Deann would probably fall over if she weren't holding a baby. Harpers saying her singing is okay? Whoa. "I've...thought about it, but I don't rightly know if I'm any good...." she murmurs, taking refuge in concentrating on Brencia again.

Kae mouths the words 'thank you' to T'rell, and turns to Deann, offering her assistance, "Come see me sometime, and we'll see what *I* think about your talents, alright?" With that, her chair is pushed back, and she gets to her feet, turning toward Marius and motioning for him to lead the way.

Pookah> T'rell's eyes follow Kaeryn and Marius, his expression closed. Once the two have gone, he stirs, reaching for the pitcher to pour himself more juice. "Sorry," he apologizes to Deann. Although Kaeryn had refused fortification, he now pulls a flask out of his pocket, pouring a small amount into the mug; with a gesture, he offers the same to the young woman.

Pookah> Deann shakes her head, not even willing to consider anything that might make her shaky. "No thank you. And no problem. You've a lovely daughter," she remarks, an attempt to change the subject. "And so quiet. Not like others I've seen," she adds, smiling down at the little girl.

Kaeryn follows along, a little slowly, as Marius leads the way back toward the harper rooms, her hands held behind her back in an effort to keep herself from reaching out to take his hand. As the wind up in the room they started out in earlier in the day, she takes up Mar's former pose and leans against the wall.

Marius turns as they enter the Harper's quarters. He looks over to Kaer for a moment, hands on hips. His slender-fingered hands run through his still-damp hair as he takes a seat on one of the benche, "Kaer, /what/ in the bloody name of Faranth are we going t' do? /You're/ miserable, /I'm/ miserable, and I'm fairly sure that /T'rell/ would be miserable if he knew what was going on..."

Pookah> T'rell replaces the flask in his pocket and sips his juice. "Now, that's juice," he proclams it, relaxing slightly while his smile reappears. "She's just great. We've all heard horror stories of other people's kids, but so far, so good." He knocks on the table softly, then jokes, "'Course, I'll probably be tearing my hair out in a few more months."

"He knows," Kae whispers softly as she slips down the wall into a seated position on the floor. After untangling her skirts, she tucks her knees up against her chest and crosses her arms around them. "After you left the other day, I," she looks up at him and shrugs, "I was really upset, and he wanted to know what was wrong, so...I told him."

Pookah> Deann laughs softly. "When she's walking and talking and growing unbelievably skilled at evading being caught by mommy and daddy, you mean?" she can't resist asking, grinning. "Oh, but she's a darling now, so you have that to savor, I think," she goes on to point out.

Marius leans forward, elbows on knees and chin in his hands. He cocks his head slightly at the news, then sighs. His voice softens slightly, "What did he say?"

Kaeryn closes her eyes and leans her head back against the wall, unable to look Marius in the face without showing the struggle going on behind her eyes. "He said he loves me," she replies softly, and shakes her head, showing that she doesn't know what else to say, or do.

Pookah> T'rell chuckles. "Something like that." Sleepily, Brencia opens her eyes just enough to focus on Deann's button, which she slowly reaches for. Before she can complete the motion, her mouth O's in a large yawn and she settles back in cozily, fast asleep again. "Mm. If she sleeps all evening, she'll be up in the middle of the night," the man considers. "But if we wake her now, she won't like us very much." He makes a weighing motion with his hand, and decides. "Better leave her asleep."

Marius leaves his perch on the bench and moves over to crouch near Kaer. He reaches out and gently lifts her face until she's looking him in the eye, "Kaer...I never meant for any of this to happen. Not like this..."

Pookah> Deann likes her buttons -on- her tunics, so this is probably good. "Good idea, but I have to run. I promised some appy cooks I'd clean up after one of their cooking attempts," she explains, sighing. "So if you'd take your daughter...?"

Pookah> "Thanks," T'rell laughs lightly. "Usually she's not much neater than apprentice cooks, but tonight I think I've got the better end of the bargain." He puts his mug down and rises to slowly transfer the sleepy infant. No longer awkward with her, he settles her into the crook of his arm and retakes his seat with only a light, drooling murmur from the girl.

As Kae's eyes meet Mar's, she gives him a small, somewhat forced, smile, and nods her head. "I know, Mar. It isn't like you choose who you care about... who you love, right?"

Marius's hand slide from its position on Kae's chin to slide around to cup her cheek, "Even so, if I'd known more about how you and T'rell felt about each other, or that it'd would have caused you this much pain...I wouldn'a have opened my bloody mouth..."

Pookah> Deann smiles, standing gracefully. "It was nice meeting you both. And Harper Kaeryn as well." She nods slightly and heads towards the inner caverns and the dorms, planning to change into something less...nice before helping with any mess.

Kaeryn tilts her head slightly so that it presses against Mar's hand, and her eyes slip closed, just enjoying the touch. "But to know... just to know that you care, that you," she licks her lips and opens her eyes to look at him again, "that you love me..."

Marius nods with a soft smile on his face, "Aye, I do. And you know that I'll /always/ be here for you. Whenever you need me." His smile fades a bit as he leans in and, just this once, presses his lips to hers.

"But.." Kae begins, but is cut off by the totally unexpected kiss, her eyes slipping closed yet again. The tips of her fingers brush against his cheek and she pulls her face, though, thanks to the wall behind her. "Do you have any idea how long I've been waiting for you to do that?" she whispers shakily.

Pookah> T'rell sits quietly, daughter resting comfortably in the crook of an arm and with a mug in hand. Pensively he leans back in the chair, watching the sleeping girl; but occasionally he looks up, seeking the cavern that leads farther into the weyr. Expressions change on his face, and now and then a smile hints, then fades again.

Marius smiles slightly, their faces still not more than a few fingerlengths apart, "Too long, I think." He sighs, and leans forward once more, this time his lips touching only her forehead, "I only wish it could have happened sooner..."

Pookah> T'rell, in a pensive pose with a sleeping infant on his lap, glances up at the sound of an arrival and he smiles. "Evening," he greets quietly.

Pookah> Annalysa raises an eyebrow and changes her path to wander over to see T'rell at his chair. Her eyes fall to the sweet bundle in his lap and a soft smile curls her lips. Annly pulls up a chair beside him and continues to gaze on his daughter. "what's her name?"

Pookah> "Brencia," T'rell replies, shifting the girl just slightly to show her off, just a bit, to Annalysa. "I guess you haven't met yet, have you?" The remains of dinner are still on the table as he still holds what looks to be a mug of juice. Then he grins. "Did you get to swim the other day?"

"Should have, should have," Kae says, and repeats herself, shaking her head in dismat at both herself and at the man so close to her, physically, yet somehow... "But I don't know how to let you go, Marius, not...not like this."

Pookah> Annalysa lightly runs a finger across Brencia's cheek, her smile softening. "oh.. no. Not really. We sat and talked for a while, then went home again and tried for one of these." She says it so nonchallently, that she hopes the intamacy of the situation doesn't make T'rell uncomfortable. "Did you swim when you were done with Sejith?"

Marius stands, pulling her up with him and into a fierce embrace, "It's not letting go. Just...moving away from each other." He takes a deep breath, more to try to convince himself of that fact than anything else.

Pookah> Actually, it amused him more than anything. "You and S'cud, trying? Don't that beat all." T'rell winks. "Practice makes perfect, you know." He takes a sip from his mug, then shakes his head in answer to her question. "No, we'd finished already."

Pookah> Annalysa wrinkles her nose in T'rell's general direction as he speaks of S'cud and herself. She doesn't want to explain about how her family is notorious for not baring more than one child in their lifetime.. and that after many years of trying.. tis a bit of a sore subject. Instead, she sits up and smiles at him. "Such a pity. Someone told me it was great for swimming last night."

Kaeryn allows herself to be pulled up and held in Mar's arms, wrapping her's around him as well, and burying her face against his neck. "But it's all the same, isn't it? We're just supposed to go back to the way things were, without ever even having a chance," she whispers quietly, her voice muffled by the closeness.

Pookah> Brencia begins to squirm in T'rell's lap, awakening gradually and grasping half-heartedly at anything nearby -- mostly the rider's jacket. Distracted, the man offers a finger instead of the tough wherhide, moving her to the other knee. "Oh, it was," he answers after a beat. "Sejith went in later -- he's got more energy these days than I do." He gives a half-grin -- the cause is pretty obvious.

Marius shakes his head, somehow managing to maneuver in the tight embrace, "Nae. Things won't ever be the same." He moves away a bit so that he can look into her eyes, "We can't go back, but we really never had a chance." A few strands of wet hair hang down in his face, framing those blue eyes for a moment, "We don't have a choice, either..."

Pookah> Annalysa nods and smiles again. "so, what's it like? Is this your first child?" She smiles a bit and gets comfortable in her chair for a moment. "Can i hold her? I promise i'll be gentle."

"But it isn't... it's not... it isn't *fair*, Mar," Kae whispers quietly as she leans forward to press her cheek against his, the tears, once again, beginning to slip down her cheeks.

Pookah> T'rell nods, a bit pleased, perhaps, and half-stands to carefully transfer the girl, wide awake now and curious, to Annalysa's arms. "Yeah, she's at least the first to admit to having me as a dad," he responds jokingly. "And it's -- incredible," he searches for words, all of them insufficient. "As much as Impression was, only in a different way."

Marius gently strokes her hair with his hands, only then realizing that they're trambling. "I know, I know..." he murmurs softly into her hair, "I'm sorry..."

"Why does it have to be like this, though? I don't understand, I don't..." Kae's arms wrap around his neck again, and she buries his face against his shoulder. "I just wish..."

Pookah> Annalysa is almost totally absorbed in the baby as she floats towards then finally lands in her arms. She smiles and nods, listening to T'rell, but not really acknowledging him. She cradles the child for a while and grins, then looks up at her friend. "She's absolutely beautiful. I can sort of understand how you feel. I think i would live in awe of her.. in her quiet moments..." She grins... "... if she were mine."

Marius sighs and just holds her in his arms, "I don't know, Kaeryn. I just don't know." He gives her one more squeeze, then slowly extricates himself from her arms. His movements, carrying him away from Kaer, show that he, too, has been shedding tears. He rests his hands on her lips, silencing her for a brief moment. Then his lips find hers once more, this time the kiss feeling more like a goodbye than a promise of anything further.

Pookah> T'rell pounces on the opportunity, his eyes dancing mischievously as he retakes his seat, watching Annly. "If you'd like to watch her sometimes..." He had to suggest. Really he did. "Not necessarily in just her quiet moments." Brencia, for her part, has now focussed on Annly's vest, tugging it toward her mouth.

Pookah> Annalysa raises an eyebrow at T'rell and grins. "I'll have to ask S'cud, but I most definately want to." She sticks her finger in a near by bubblie and waves the same finger over Brencia's face. She chews on her lip as she admires the little one. "I'm you could use some sleep sometimes." she wants to ask about Kaeryn, but doesn't really want to step on anyone's toes.

Kaeryn's ponderings are silenced by the kiss, even the gentle sobs that have begun to sound in her chest disappear for the soft, quiet moment. "I'm afraid that if you walk out that door..." she admits the deepest of her fears for him after stepping away from the kiss to look in his eyes. "I'm afraid you'll never walk through it again, that you won't be.... be here anymore."

Marius smiles softly and shakes his head, "That'll never happen, Kae. If you ever need me, I'll be here. I'll come through Frost, Fire, and Fall if I have to, but I'll come." Mar gently brushes away the tear trackes left on Kae's face, "I'm not about to disappear."

Pookah> "Both of us could." There, and no toes stepped on. T'rell smiles as Brencia reaches up and grabs at Annalysa's finger in midair, catching it with a tough grasp to bring it into her mouth. "Mostly on Threadfall days. That part's hard on Kaeryn, I think." Mention of her name seems to conjure that pensive look he was wearing when he thought he was alone, but only fleetingly.

Pookah> Annalysa raises an eyebrow. She doesn't mean to.. "I.. i really don't want to pry, but why is it hard on her? Normally.. i wouldn't.. but seeing as how i am trying to achieve what she has doen so beautifully.. I just want to know." She a bit .. pleasantly surprised by Brencia's grasp, but allows the little one to guide the finger into her mouth. She's got to teach them young to enjoy her cooking.

Pookah> T'rell hides whatever concerns he might have for the moment under a light, teasing laugh. "All the sordid details, eh? Well, she hasn't yet slept through the night, so that means somebody's up most of the night with her. That generally defaults to Mom," he fondly watches the infant try to suck more bubbly out of Annalysa's finger with little effect. "I can tell you about changing diapers, too, if you really want," he offers, no stranger to the process any longer.

Pookah> Annalysa nods and smiles. "oh.. well, I've cared for my little brother when he was newborn. I can definately understand how to change diapers." She nods and wriggles her finger around in the infants mouth. "I thought perhaps it was a tad more complicated .. with riders involved. I don't know why, but oh well." She nods and wrinkels her nose. "But i don't suppose you mind your chores at all.. do you?"

Pookah> T'rell shrugs. "Well, she hasn't gotten all that stinky yet," he reasons. "So far, no, I can't say I do mind." Strange how a child can get a fellow to open up, his tone betraying the depth of feeling bound up with his daughter. "Uh, oh, she's looking for your hair," he warns suddenly. "She pulls."

"Maybe one day," Kae wonders aloud, her voice sounding a little dreamy, hopeful, and then she shakes her head quickly, not willing to admit her hopes, not now. "I want you to know my daughter, to be a part of her life... and mine, of course. You are *always* welcome in my home, wherever that might be."

Marius strokes Kae's cheek softly and nods, "I'll be there. I promise." He moves closer, taking one last deep breath of Kaeryn, then slowly releasing it, "I'd better go have a talk with T'rell..."

Pookah> Time passes... After the cook's departure, T'rell finally drains his mug and, hoisting a now-restless kid up to shoulder-height, he leaves the table and, with a last glance to the inner cavern entrance, starts to slowly pace toward the bowl.

"I love you," Kae whispers softly, before taking a step backwards, and releasing her hold on him.

"I love you, too." Marius whispers. He catches her hand in his and brings it to his lips for a brief moment. Then he turns and walks out.

Brencia, wide awake and squirming, gives a cry of delight when she spots her mother. "Hey, now, no falling over," T'rell warns lightly, supporting her growing weight even as she leans toward Kaeryn. Without specifically asking, the rider looks Kaeryn over as he approaches, wincing a little at traces of tears. "She's missed you."

"Does that mean she's hungry?" Kae asks softly as she wanders toward her room, rubbing her hand over her face to belatedly remove all traces of tears. At the door, she turns, and looks at T'rell, her face sad, "I wasn't ready for that, I wasn't ready to let him walk out the door, even though... even though I want to be with you."

T'rell moves close, transferring a very willing Brencia over to Kaeryn's arms. "I think she just missed you, that's all." He stays close, putting an arm around the harper's slimming waist in a gesture of affection. "Please understand, Kaeryn." He starts slowly, the words not easy for him. "Most of all, I need you to be honest. With me as much as with yourself." A finger strokes Brencia's shoulder, too. "And with her."

Kaeryn rubs at her eyes with the back of her hand before allowing her eyes to meet his, and her hand moves up to gently touch his cheek. "I love him, T'rell. I love him so much, but do you honestly think I would be here right now, with you, if I didn't love you more? Do you think I could let him leave, knowing that nothing will ever be the same between us, if I didn't know in my heart and in my mind that I wanted to be here, with you?" She stands there, their daughter in her arms, with his arm around her waist, looking as thought it took every bit of energy she had to say what she just did.

In T'rell's eyes is reflected Kaeryn's hurt, her bewilderment, and most of all, her love. Without a word, he kisses her fully and with passion, embracing both her and their child in a single, all-encompassing gesture.

"So if you ever doubt that I love you," Kae whispers as she reaches up an arm to wrap it around his shoulder, causing Bren to protest, loudly, "remember this. I'm still here." Her hand slips down from his shoulder and into his hand, where she entwines her fingers with his and steps through the doorway into her... their... room.

"I believe you," T'rell whispers simply.

---

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