| "Get in the fucking car, now!" JC stood outside his rented Jeep, staring hard at his girlfriend. She had that pathetic defiant look on her face, the one he wanted so desperately to slap off her. "Now!" he yelled, hurrying to the passenger side and grabbing her elbow. "Josh, you are drunk, and I am not getting in that car with you!" She held her temper in check, crossing her arms over her chest. Inside, her heart beat quickly, the smell of alcohol thick on his breath. There was just no way she could ride with him. She'd drive, only her blood alcohol content was pretty high as well. "I fucking swear to God, if you don't get your ass in this car now, I'm leaving you here! I will." His blue eyes grew a steely shade of grey and he glared at her, clenching his teeth until his jaw hurt. She stood perfectly still, challenging him. "Fine, stay here!" he growled, storming away. Quickly, she followed him to the drivers side, panicked that he would really take off. "Don't go," she pleaded, grabbing at his jacket. "Come on back inside. Let's talk about it okay?" Their earlier fight had caused several stares at the party they had been attending, finally Joey asking them to take it outside. She watched in horror as he shoved her back roughly and climbed in, his cheeks hot with drunkeness. "You can't drive," she screamed, reaching in to swipe the keys from his hands. "Give em back," he warned, pressing his lips together furiously. He knew somewhere in the back of his mind that he shouldn't be driving, but right now he didn't care. The party had been a downer from the moment they'd arrived. His four bandmates socializing like nothing was wrong, his girlfriend deserting him for some television sit com actor, and hords of people all crushed together in that small house. It was not a good scene, not one that he wanted to be in. When the actor pulled his girlfriend on the makeshift dance floor to grind against her, well, that's when the booze started. An hour later, and she still hadn't made an attempt to come find him, well, that's when the fight started. His good friend, Joey, coming to save him. Hell, he wasn't coming to defend him, he was coming over to ask him to leave, fucking leave. That had been that, JC was outta there, dragging his reluctant girlfriend after him. JC wrapped his hands around the steering wheel and tried to clear his mind, just for a moment, grasp onto some reality here. The drinks had caught up with him in a hurry, and his mind whirled, creating a slow motion haze. Gently, he rested his forehead on the wheel, letting it's coolness chill his warm head. "Thank God, Joey, he's going to drive. Here's the keys. I'm going to call us a cab." JC could hear her whiny voice tattling on him and he snapped his head up to see his friend shaking his head at him. "Oh, this is fucking wonderful," he groaned, feeling trapped. Why was this all happening to him? N Sync was contemplating taking a break, and everyone was acting as if it was no big deal. Was he the only one who could see the damage that would be caused by taking serious time off? Lance was talking about a year, while Chris was pushing for two. "JC, come on out of there," Joey said sternly, pulling on the door. "You can't drive like this, you'll get killed. Get out." "Screw you," JC hissed, shoving the door open with a forceful grunt. Without warning, he speared Joey in the stomach, sending him sprawling backwards. "You piece of shit! Give me my keys, now!" He sat ontop of his group mate, struggling to pry the keys out of his grip. Joey quickly regained his composure, flipping JC over. "Stop it!" he grimaced, holding him down. Joey hurled the keys to the side, hoping the darkness would hide them from his drunken buddy. "JC, quit!" JC scrambled out of Joey's reach and crawled over to where he thought he saw the keys glinting in the moonlight. He patted the damp grass, until he caught them in his grasp. "Got em," he grunted, as Joey tugged his ankle, causing him to tumble to the ground again. "I said, quit it!" Joey demanded, not having seen JC pocket the keys. Pulling him up, he frowned in disgust. "Look, I know you're going through some shit here, man, but please. Don't think we don't care." He brushed the dirt and grass from his jeans and jacket, catching Lance and Justin approaching from the corner of his eye. JC rolled his eyes as the "pretty patrol", as he'd snidley christened them, rushed over. "What's going on?" Lance asked, concern plastered all over his face. Joey sighed. "JC's wasted. He's trying to drive." JC fingered the keys in his pocket, and backed up slowly. He was pissed off, having them talk about him while he was in earshot, pretending he wasn't there. They all thought he was overreacting about the temporary split, and humored him. "Fuck you all," he whispered, dashing into the Jeep. He started it up, watching as his three friends went pale with shock. Justin ran to the driver's side. "JC, come on," he begged, pulling on the door. "Sorry, buddy," he answered hotly, "Take your fucking break! I'm gone!" He gunned the engine, causing Justin to jump back, the force of the Jeep's take off sent him to the pavement. "Josh, no!" Lance screamed, his eyes following the car as it sped off down the road, swerving slightly. He ran after it, unsucessfully, and fell to his knees as he saw it jerk hard to the left, barely avoiding an oncoming car who blasted it's horn in warning. Justin stood up swiftly, and narrowed his eyes to watch JC's out of control Jeep twist to the right, tires screetching, then roll over onto it's back. "Oh my God!" he screamed, covering his mouth with his hand in horror. Joey tore off in the direction of the overturned vehicle, calling out over his shoulder. "Call 911, someone!" Chris stumbled out into the yard along with several guest and JC's girlfriend as they heard the yelling and the squeal of tires. He noticed Lance collapsed, Joey running and Justin frozen. "What the...." "Call 911 I said!" Joey screamed again. Chris hurried into the road and saw the accident. "Justin, what's going on?" Justin raced past him, and into the house, never saying a word. JC's girlfriend followed Chris out there, her screams piercing the night air. "Josh, no!" She fled down the blacktopped street, chasing after Lance, who had finally started to head that way. Joey peeked inside the twisted wreckage, searching for some sign of JC. "Come on buddy, where the hell are you?" He strained to keep his mind sharp, his voice in check. He didn't want to alarm anyone unnecessarily. "JC? You okay?" Nothing, no whimpers, no cries. He felt around the crushed window with his hand, but couldn't make anyone out. "Joey, over here!" Lance cried, pointing to the thick brush on the side of the road. Joey squinted into the darkness, but couldn't see much. "I hear him," Lance explained, diving into the high weeds. Chris held JC's girlfriend, trying to comfort her. "Let them find him," he said softly. "Help is on the way." Lance stumbled through the blackness, cocking his ear for the sound he'd heard. "JC?" he called. A small moan replied and he headed toward it. "Joey, over here!" Walking through the grass, he tripped, his hands fell out before him, landing on JC's arm. "God, Josh?" Joey knelt down next to them. "We need a flashlight!" he hollered, feeling his way around his fallen friend. "Josh, can you hear us?" Nothing, no moans, nothing. "Fuck!" he hissed. "Come on, JC, talk to me!" Lance bit back his tears, his body shivering. He threw his shirt over his head and covered JC with it, surely if he was cold, JC was freezing. His eyes adjusted to the night a bit, and he could make out a contorted body, and his hands felt the wetness on JC's body. "Blood," he cried, sniffling at Joey. "He's bleeding." Justin appeared, flashlight in hand, while Chris held party guests at bay. The glow from the light revealed a gory mess, causing them to gasp. JC was bloodied, his arm twisted unnaturally, one leg bent completely behind him. "No!" Justin wailed, reaching for his oldest friend. He took his "good" hand and squeezed it gently. In minutes, the red lights of ambluance and rescue shone through the neighborhood, and the three friends were shoved back while crews worked on the singer. Justin rocked back and forth hugging his knees to his chest. "Please God, let him be okay." Lance sank down in the cold, wet ground next to him, shaking with no shirt on. They could hear JC's girlfriend screaming hysterically from somewhere behind them, and Chris shushing her in comfort. Joey was talking to the rescue workers. "I just don't know how much he drank.....No, he doesn't do drugs, he was just drinking........He was upset, this isn't like him....." Lance sniffled loudly. "It's our fault. We did this to him," he said softly. Justin nodded in the faint glow of the moonlight. "I know, I know. We shouldn't have pushed for a break so hard. We knew what it would do to him, and now this." A loud sob fell from his lips, and he lowered his head. Lance put his arm around him, trying his best to comfort him. "Let's just pray," he said, watching as the rescue workers lifted JC into the back of the ambulance. "So don't drink and drive!" The red light on the camera blinked off, and sniffles epupted from the room. "That was great, guys, thanks," the director complimented, already watching the replay. "Yeah, great," Lance snorted, miserably, tears burning his eyes. Justin bit his lip hard, causing it to bleed. "Can we go now?" he asked, his big blue eyes searching Chris' for approval. Chris nodded, rubbing his hands over his eyes. "Yeah, we got one more stop today." He put his arm around Justin and guided him down to the awaiting van. Joey sighed and followed, motioning for Lance to come with them. The silence was eerie as the van's tires crunched along the road, finally pulling off and heading down a gravel road. When it stopped, Chris lead the others out, over the grass. He paused, looking behind him to make sure they were all there. Then he continued, not stopping until he came upon the large, grey slab. "Here it is," he said softly, looking down. Lance shoved his hands into his pockets, the tears rolling down his face. "Joshua Scott Chasez," he read. "Man, we miss you." Justin was helped along by Joey, his eyes blurred with tears, plopping unmercifully onto his jacket. Joey pressed his lips to one another, begging himself not to cry, to stay strong for them. "He would have liked all the flowers," he commented, looking around. There were hundreds of plants, flowers, and little souviners hanging about. Chris nodded, picking up a gold music note that a fan must have placed on the headstone. "Yeah, he would have." Lance fell to his knees and touched the inscription lightly. "Music of our hearts," he said, choking up. "That's fitting, don't ya think?" The four of them nodded in agreement at the quote his parents had put on it. "We really miss you dude," Chris whispered, laying a hand on Lance's shoulder. "We really do." "He would have liked all the flowers," he commented, looking around. There were hundreds of plants, flowers, and little souviners hanging about. Chris nodded, picking up a gold music note that a fan must have placed on the headstone. "Yeah, he would have." Lance fell to his knees and touched the inscription lightly. "Music of our hearts," he said, choking up. "That's fitting, don't ya think?" The four of them nodded in agreement at the quote his parents had put on it. "We really miss you dude," Chris whispered, laying a hand on Lance's shoulder. "We really do." |
| NO GOING BACK by destiny |