Southern Comfort (1/?)

Author- Midnight Faith

Spoilers- 'Dead End' 'Loyalty' and 'Sleep Tight'

Distribution- FF.net, AOH anyone else just ask :)

Pairing- Lilah/Lindsey (when is it ever anything else?) and some Wes/Fred stuff… as an experiment

Rating- R

Summary- Lilah has to make choices when her life gets complicated…

Notes- For Gary for setting me this challenge, Chris for being my rock and Lynne as always… I love you guys

Disclaimer- not mine… yadda, yadda

And a side note… you don’t like the pairing don't bother to review OK?

The sharp knock on her door came as a surprise and sent tiny shivers down her spine.

On instinct she glanced at her watch. 7:59. 'This better be good,' she thought as she struggled up from the sofa, briefly smoothing down her black tank top and jeans she'd slipped into after work.

Friday night. 'Friends' night. Lilah liked to watch the oh so perky, six from Manhattan. She didn't think she'd ever laughed once at it she just liked to watch the way they interacted. Not with acidity or possessiveness or any of the things forged within her own relationships. But with love and affection. Lilah didn't think she'd ever truly been loved. Not once in her life.

Reaching the door she slowly clicked open the three locks briefly contemplating that it might be a grapplar demon sent by Gavin to rip her throat open… or not. She doubted even Gavin, who she considered the closest thing to an arch nemesis right now, even thought of her that much.

She swung the door open forcefully.

"Thirty seconds…" her tone was angry but she trailed off when she saw who her visitor was.

For a moment time seemed to stand still as she locked eyes with him. Then as if in slow motion the remote that she held in her left hand crashed noisily to the marble floor the batteries ripped away from their container on impact.

"Lindsey," she said impartially, dropping to her knees to pick up the component parts of her remote. She made it so her eyes skilfully avoided his; eager to conceal the shaking of her hands, which she was grateful, hadn't seeped into her voice.

"Hey," he said cautiously, bending down to pick up a battery that had bounced it's way out of her front door.

Without really meaning to, their eyes locked and Lilah parted her lips in a silent, unnamed question. Neither of them moved until Lindsey pulled himself off the floor offering his hand down to her and drew her from the ground.

"Here," he said handing her the battery, before saying, "You're shaking."

"I guess I'm just a little shocked," she said poignantly, "Here you are. On my doorstep."

She turned around and he followed her back into her living room, shutting the door behind him and sliding all three bolts across.

"You can never be too careful," he told her, standing by the door as if he were nervous or afraid of her.

Lilah nearly laughed at the inanity of it all. Here they were stood in her living room, having worked together side by side for almost four years and they were acting like virtual, awkward strangers at a cocktail party.

She walked over to the TV, flicking it onto standby.

Silence seemed to creep into and flood every corner of the room, starving the air of oxygen so much so Lilah felt she could no longer breathe.

She gestured to her red, velveteen sofa and he sat down woodenly gratefully accepting.

"Aren’t you going to sit down?" he asked her.

She shook her head slightly.

"No, I'd rather stand," she told him a little indifferently.

"So you stand up, in your own apartment… a lot?" he asked trying to cut the tension in the air.

"Not normally no," she bit back, "special occasion," she retorted with a caustic smile.

He shook his head slightly.

"Are you ever going to change?" he asked her with a hint of frustration in his voice.

"Around you? Never?" she told him, before biting in, in a sliced tone, "What are you doing here?"

"So we're cutting right to the chase? No small talk? No 'how are you?' 'Good how are you?' stuff."

"No, you're going to tell me why you're here…" she told him defensively.

He held out his hands to her hoping she'd take a truce.

"Just kinda found myself back in LA…" he told her, "Simple as that."

"So you just thought you'd look me up?" she shrugged her shoulders slightly.

He nodded.

"Pretty much. I just wanted to check you were still alive…"

"What? Were you hoping I wasn't?"

"No I…"

"You've seen me. I'm fine. So can you just go?" Lilah cut in feeling the anger rise in her veins over the man who essentially abandoned her.

"Lilah…" he tried to softly mediate with her.

"What did you expect Lindsey?" She asked him, feeling six months worth of anger bubble underneath her skin, "A 'welcome back' party?" She felt as if someone had drained all the energy out of her in that allegation and she crossed unsteadily over to the sofa, sitting down beside him, trying to maintain her distance.

"I had no choice," he told her softly, shifting slightly closer to her. She made no attempt to move away, not really feeling the energy to.

"And I'm sorry," he told her.

She exhaled shakily.

"You don't mean that," she told him vapidly.

"Yes. I do." He told her exasperatedly.

"You never mean anything you say."

"So what if I've changed?" He asked her with an integrity he'd never really shown her before.

She sighed slightly.

"You'll never change," she told him, half a cynical smile almost sliding into he features.

"And what about you?" he asked her smoothly, "Will you ever change? Have you?"

"Can we not?" she asked, standing up sharply, crossing her arms and turning back to face him.

"OK…"

"So where have you been?" she asked quickly, trying to change the subject, swallowing hard.

"Cruising around the mid west I guess," he said with a shrug. "I went home for a couple of months and then I remembered just why I left. Oklahoma's just… a giant dust bowl I guess. So before I knew it I was back in LA…" He paused for a moment, half expecting her to say something. When she didn't and just continued to look at him, her eyes betraying no emotion he added, "How's your mum anyway?"

"She's OK I guess," Lilah said softening slightly, thinking maybe he actually cared, "She barely recognises me… but she's not getting any worse."

"And…"

"And nothing," Lilah said, visibly relaxing, feeling the fury drain out of her body.

"Nothing? Family, friends… boyfriend?" Lindsey asked. Lilah briefly wondered if it was a hint of jealousy in his voice before she quickly concluded she was just imagining things.

She shook her head.

"Nothing." She smiled genuinely at him. What was it that made her suddenly come to trust him?

His face suddenly became serious as he walked over to her, putting his hands on her arms.

"I *will* make this up to you," he said staring, deep into her eyes, as if trying to drown in the sapphire oceans. "Let me take you out for a drink."

She nodded and wordlessly followed him out of the door as if on autopilot…