Lilac comfort

Author- Midnight Faith

Spoilers- 'Dead End'

Distribution- AOH, Fanfiction.net, Buffysearch, Challenge in a can… anyone else just ask :)

Pairing- Lindsey/Lilah… in a way…

Rating- PG… just in case… barely that

She's sick of not knowing what's in the bottom drawer of her desk.

*Her* desk… not his anymore.

One night she gets so sick of not knowing she does something she's never done before and kicks it open. Sick of being so graceful, the calm one, the pretty one on the fifteenth floor she's just 'that girl that works there.'

And simmering beneath the surface it's always been there. The need to scream. The need to cry. The sheer passion of it all. Just to feel *something. *

The handle on the drawer snaps open on impact, as does the plastic of her shoe heel. Calmly, she bends down to take of her shoes, her hands shaking, suddenly afraid of what she might find.

She pulls the drawer out of its hinges and finds a shirt in there screwed up in the corner.

She knows it's his on instinct. The pine scent of his aftershave she grew to detest after seven years of working with him suddenly comforting as she holds the shirt to her nose and inhales deeply.

The colour of lilacs, that's what her name means doesn't it? She can't help think this is a sign, a prophecy sent from a higher power.

She stands up and smoothes the creases out of it laying it over her immaculate desk, briefly wondering what it's doing here, did she have something to do with it? She doesn't remember…

Automatically, she picks up the shirt and wraps it round her shoulders reveling in its scent.

She feels something she's never felt before… she feels suddenly lonely…