Flesh and Blood (25/25)

Author- Midnight Faith

Pairing- Lindsey/Lilah with Cordy/Angel on the side…

Spoilers- BtVS- 'Smashed,' 'Dead Things,' 'Grave.'

Distribution- ff.net, Ace of Harts, Neurotica… anyone else just ask :)

Rating- R

Summary- And finally…

Notes-' Part 3/3 of a trilogy. Which also contains 'Southern Comfort' and 'Silver Cloud, Bitter Lining.'

"I wonder if Lindsey remembered to feed Bailey…" Lilah mused allowed as Cordy slid the last of her hairpins into place.

"Who's Bailey?" Dawn asked from across the other side of the dressing room, where she was applying a coat of neutral, clear lipgloss to her lips.

"Bailey's our cat," Cordy explained, giving Lilah's barrow curls a final spritz of hairspray, tinged slightly with silver glitter.

"You guys have a cat? Since when?" Dawn asked animatedly.

"Since two days ago," Lilah told her, "Lindsey bought her for me for Christmas…"

"You’re so lucky… you have that whole 'Friends' meets Ally Mcbeal thing going on… can I come and live with you?" Dawn asked, deadly serious.

"You don't wanna live with them," Cordy joked, trying to lighten the mood, "Lilah's way untidy and she watches Will and Grace round the clock…"

"I'm so not a secret insomniac," Lilah shrugged before asking Dawn, "Things not great at home?"

"Buffy and Spike are with the non snuggly buggly… and this was before Spike left town. Tara's dead and Willow's depressed over the whole 'I was evil and wanted to destroy the world' thing. Oh yeah… things are great…"

"Well I learnt when things get tough you stick with the people that love you and they help you through it…" Lilah said, smiling up at Cordy.

"Does it get any better?" Dawn asked them.

"Sometimes there are moments that change your life," Lilah told her, a rare hint of sentimentality creeping into her voice, "Like today…"

"Dawn, why don't you go out front and help Wesley with the balloon people?" Cordy asked, intuitively picking up on the hint of uneasiness in Lilah's voice.

"OK…" Dawn shrugged, "I'm sensing you two are in need of some time…"

Cordy followed Dawn over to the door and shut it behind her.

"You're nervous aren't you?" Cordy stated neutrally.

"Terrified…"

"You shouldn't be… at the risk of sounding like I'm stuck on repeat mode you and Lindsey are great together…"

"But is it enough? I'm worried we aren't strong enough…"

"In what context?"

"To deal with Hannah. What if we have to give her up again… for good this time and… I don't think we'd be strong enough to stay together…"

"That bridge will never be crossed… you'll cope… you're just nervous because you're a little out of practice. In a few days you'll have a routine down and you'll be fine… and I'm around as much or as little as you want me to be…"

"Are you staying at the hotel tonight… with Angel?"

"That's the plan… why?"

"Stay at home tonight… please?"

"On the balcony with earplugs, Marilyn Manson and the cat?"

"I just really might need someone…"

"You'll have Lindsey…"

"What if it all gets too much?"

"I think you're just in need of a little reassurance… from Lindsey…"

"It's bad luck to see each other…"

"Who says you have to see each other?"

*****

"She's right on the other side of the door," Cordy told Lindsey, stood awkwardly in the corridor outside Lilah's hotel room.

"I feel weird doing this," he confessed.

"Just talk to her…" Cordy said exasperatedly, "This is your last chance… I'll be back in a minute…"

"Lilah?" Lindsey said through the door tentatively when Cordy had walked away.

"Lindsey?" she said back.

"Are you OK?"

"I don't know…"

"We don't have to do this… we don't have to prove anything to anyone…"

"Are you backing out?"

"Not if you aren't… all I ask is if you're going to break my heart… if you want us to split up, just do it fast… here… not in front of everyone…"

"I don’t… I want to get married… I'm just nervous…"

"Me too…" Lindsey said, looking up to see Cordy and Wesley walking down the corridor towards him.

Cordy mouthed 'OK' at him. He smiled and nodded.

"Lilah… I've got to go. See you in there?"

"Sure…"

"I love you…"

"You too…"

Lindsey blew Lilah a kiss through the door, before turning and leaving Cordy and Wesley outside the door.

"Can we come in?" Cordy asked through the door.

"Yeah…" came her reply.

Cordy opened the door and gestured for Wesley to follow her.

"Well… what do you think?" Cordy asked him gesturing to Lilah's strapless, white dress.

"You look stunning," Wesley told Lilah, giving her a hug, "If I were in Lindsey's shoes now…"

"Next time," she promised jokingly.

"We'd better get going," Cordy said, "I'll go first… you guys follow in a minute…"

"Are you sure?" Wesley asked Lilah, when Cordy was out of earshot.

"Than I ever have been in my life," she reassured him.

"You ready then?"

"As I'll ever be…"

*****

They swayed gently together to the slow, sensuous sound of the music, their arms around each other, bodies becoming one.

She shivered as his hand brushed over her bare shoulders.

"Cold?" Lindsey asked Lilah, pulling her closer to him.

"No… perfect," she smiled, taking his left hand in hers and letting the gold of his wedding band glisten in the half-light. She kissed the ring lightly, "Feel like a dead weight yet?"

"No," he told her truthfully, "It makes me feel complete… are you ready to go home yet?"

"Yeah… if you go and ask Fred to dance I'll get Cordy to cover for us if we sneak away…"

"Is Cordy coming home tonight?"

"I think so… are you mad?"

"Of course not… it's her apartment too and besides… she's family… I just want our first night together to be special… that's all… and not just in a sex way… waking up tomorrow morning side by side…"

"At four a.m. because Hannah's crying… come on… I'll talk to Cordy…"

They walked away from the dancefloor hand in hand, over to a nearby table where Hannah was asleep in Cordy's arms.

"She's so good…" Cordy said, handing Hannah to Lilah gently so not to wake her, "She hasn't woken up once yet…"

"Ten to one says she's up all night…" Lilah said, Lindsey's arms encircling her waist for support. Cordy smiled up at them thinking they looked the epitome of trust, support and unity.

"Do you want to dance?" Lindsey asked Fred, over Lilah's shoulder.

Fred smiled brightly at him before asking Lilah,

"Do you mind?"

"Of course not," she said, as Lindsey kissed her on the cheek and offered Fred his arm.

"You OK?" Cordy asked Lilah as she sat down in the chair beside her, "Not all too much?"

"Not yet… we're just both exhausted… actually we're sneaking off in a minute… cover for us?"

Cordy raised an eyebrow.

"Would you rather I didn't come home tonight?" she asked, "I could take Hannah…"

"No… I'd rather Hannah was with us and… it's your apartment too… and I'd prefer it if you were at home… we'll probably just crash out on the sofa in front of CNN anyway…"

"On your wedding night?"

"We need to do a little… strength conservation first… and Cordy? Thankyou… I don't know what I'd do without you…"

"And I don't know what I'd do without you…"

*****

Did she settle OK?" Lindsey asked from the doorway of the nursery where Lilah was bent over Hannah's crib.

"Like an angel."

"Talking of…" Lindsey said, walking over to her and lacing his arms around her waist, "There was no sulky, brooding scene today…"

"Maybe he's accepted us…" she said, as he kissed her, powerful yet gentle at the same time, yet filled with an undeniable passion.

He held her for a long time in silence before saying,

"I never thought I could be this happy… this sure… especially not with you…"

"Thanks," she half joked, feeling a little hurt and pulling away from him.

"That's not what I meant…" he reassured her, "I mean sometimes you're blind to what's right in front of your eyes… when I left… you were all I could think about… and I realised I was wrong in leaving and that I needed to see you… and then when I did… I fell in love with you… for the first time…"

"So you've been out of love with me?"

"I won't lie to you… there's times I've hated you so much I wanted to rip myself apart to stop the pain… but whenever I see you… I fall in love with you all over again…"

She pressed her lips to his lightly.

"That was incredibly romantic… I don't do romance…"

She leaned back into her embrace as he planted a gentle, almost tentative kiss on her cheek.

"So what now?" he whispered, "We're married… what changes?"

"Priorities?" she second guessed, "You and Hannah are top of my list now… everything that used to matter seems strangely insignificant…"

"This coming from miss corporate bandwagon… no seriously… I know what you mean…"

She twisted in his arms to kiss him on the nose.

"We'll be OK…" he said, brushing stray locks of hair behind her ear, reading the worried expression on her face, silently leading her to the inter-connecting door through to their room with a quick backward glance to make sure Hannah was still asleep.

He opened the door to reveal brightly burning candles casting soft shadows across the room. Cotton sheets had been replaced with white silk and scarlet velvet throw cushions. A single red rose lay across Lilah's pillow.

"Oh my god," she said, her eyes tearing up involuntarily, "Is this for me?"

"No it's for the other girl I married today," he joked, sitting her down on the edge of the bed, still holding her hand.

"No-one's ever done anything like this for me before… no-one's ever even given me flowers…"

He reached across and handed her the rose.

"Now they have," he said, kissing away her tears, "Why are you crying?"

"Because I'm… happy… I didn't know what that felt like before…"

"In what context?" he asked devilishly.

She hit him with a throw pillow.

"Emotionally…"

"Talking of…" he began, "I didn't do this because I wanted sex tonight… if that's what you were thinking…"

"It didn't even cross my mind," she reassured him, "You show me respect… it makes me love you more," she said, tinges of a faint blush colouring her face.

"You don’t even have to try to make me love you more…" he said, leaning across to kiss her lightly on the lips, "You don’t mind do you? That we can't afford to go on honeymoon?"

"Lindsey… I didn't marry you to get a free holiday…"

"So why did you marry me then?"

She leaned across, catching his lips in a passionate kiss that didn't end for some time.

"Now I remember," he said, a little breathlessly.

"I married you because I love you…" she told him, one hand tracing lazily across his chest, "Now lie down… relax… and let me show you…"

She gently pushed him back against the pillows, kissing him again.

"We don't have to…" he whispered breaking the kiss and burying his face in her hair, "Not tonight… we can take our time… take thing slowly…"

"This is slowly," she reassured him, "Just kiss me…"

*****

Lindsey was awakened by Lilah gently kissing at his neck.

Smiling, he turned his face to kiss her softly on the cheek.

"Hey," he said softly.

"Hey," she repeated, "I was just getting up to check on Hannah… I can't actually believe she slept through the night…"

"It's only four forty five," he told her, glancing at the bedside clock, "Give her another half an hour?"

"OK… I guess we could find other stuff to do," she breathed playfully into his ear, fingers running through his hair.

"You want to… again?"

Five times in one night… you complaining?"

"Not exactly… I guess that's the pros/cons of marrying the older woman…" he teased.

"Because those whole eighteen months make all the difference…" she said, taking his hand and tracing it gently across her stomach.

"Wait," he said, pulling his hand away to gently stroke her hair and face, "I do love you…"

She smiled up at him in response and as he bent down to kiss her Hannah began to cry.

"Well that was a blissful nanosecond," he said exasperatedly, resting his head on her shoulder.

"I'll go," she said, pulling out from under him.

They heard the door open and in an attempt to be quiet Cordy whispering,

"Ssshhh… you'll wake your mum and dad and they need some 'them' time…"

"Stay," Lindsey said, "Cordy's got her… she'll be OK…"

"Lindsey…" she said, getting out of bed and pulling on her black hoodie and jeans, "You promised you wouldn't do this…" she shivered against the cold.

"You cold?" he asked her, handing her his fleece, after pulling on some of his own clothes.

"No…" she said, pushing his arm away, "I don't want to confuse Hannah more… I'd rather smell like me…"

"She'll be fine with you…" Lindsey reassured her, "She'll remember…"

He allowed Lilah to clasp his hand and half drag; half lead him into the kitchen where Cordy was making up Hannah's bottle.

"I'm sorry," Cordy said by way of greeting, "I was trying to be quiet… go back to bed for a few more hours… you guys deserve a break…"

"No it's OK… we were awake anyway… we'll take her," Lilah said as Cordy handed Hannah to her. There were a few seconds of stillness before the baby smiled up at her in recognition.

"What were you worrying for again?" Lindsey asked Lilah affectionately, spotting a flash of black fur run underneath the table. He bent down to scoop up the cat.

"Perfect family…" Cordy noted, "If I had a camera…"

"It'd have to be an automatic with a timer because you're family too…" Lilah told her.

"New family, new day…" Cordy mused aloud, smiling, noting the sun rising over the horizon outside.

Lilah and Lindsey looked at each other and smiled. For the first time in their lives prefect was definable…