Flesh and Blood (22/25)

Author- Midnight Faith

Pairing- Lindsey/Lilah with Cordy/Angel on the side…

Spoilers- none

Distribution- ff.net, Ace of Harts, Neurotica… anyone else just ask :)

Rating- R

Summary- Christmas proves to be a tense yet romantic time…

Notes-' Part 3/3 of a trilogy. Which also contains 'Southern Comfort' and 'Silver Cloud, Bitter Lining.'

Light reflected from every corner of the harshly decorated lobby.

Sparkles spun from the eight foot ornamented pine in the centre, it's crowning glory a dazzling star that shone brightly underneath the newly acquired chandelier lighting.

Each of them had added their own personal touches to the décor, including all menagerie of baubles and wooden animals from Cordy and a mini fibre optic tree that's strands glowed in multicolour from Lindsey and Lilah.

They'd decorated the tree together ('Like a family,' Cordy had noted happily,) even Angel begrudgingly helping to affix the star to the top of the tree via a ten foot stepladder.

And now on Christmas day, as a proper extended family, with Fred's parent's visit in the New year, the wedding and obligatory phone calls home to various families pushed to the backs of their minds.

Part of Cordy's mind wanted to say the situation was idyllic. Fairy lights on the tree glimmered and the Californian day was seasonably warm.

Fred was sat on the floor next to her like an excited six year old, her eyes alive with excitement, smile wide and plastic, fake tiara that Cordy picked up as part of her present askew amongst her brown curls of hair.

Cordelia would've said almost idyllic if she hadn't seen the sadness glitter in Lilah's eyes when Angel had given Connor his gifts. Lindsey, having gained an almost attentive streak (during his unscheduled walkabout in Las Vegas Cordy second guessed,) had kissed Lilah on the cheek and put a supportive arm around her shoulders. They'd spoken in hushed, quiet tones to each other for five minutes, Cordy suspected both giving and taking comfort in each other's words.

Cordelia pulled out both their gifts from under the tree and handed them each a gift-wrapped parcel.

Lindsey unwrapped his first.

"Scotch," he said, reading the label on the bottle, "My third one today…"

"Fourth," Lilah said, leaning forward to pick up another packaged bottle from underneath the tree and handing it to him, "Sorry… some of your gifts I forgot and left at home…"

"Anyway… I want to see what you got from Cordy…" Lindsey said to Lilah as she carefully unwrapped the square box. She looked inside to see silver tear drop earrings set with a blue aquamarine stone.

"Oh god… Cordy," Lilah said, clearly tearful, "Thankyou… they're beautiful…"

"I thought they could be something blue… for Saturday…"

"I'll wear them… I love them…"

"Then you'll love this too…" Wesley said, handing her a long, rectangular box. She ripped the paper away, intrigued and opened the box to reveal a matching necklace.

"Thankyou…" she told him, leaning across to kiss him on the cheek, "It's lovely…"

"So just mine to go…" Lindsey told Lilah.

"It's here?" she asked, "I checked under the tree like a million times in the last week…"

"It's not under the tree… close your eyes…"

"What? Why?"

"Trust me… close your eyes…"

She complied tentatively, letting him take both of her hands in his and guide her up the stairs and into Fred's room.

"Lindsey this is stupid…" she said in mock exasperation.

"Two seconds," he said, his voice seemingly further away, "OK… hold out your hands…"

"Lindsey… stop it…"

"OK… open your eyes then…"

She did so, slowly to see Lindsey holding a tiny black kitten.

Her face seemed to melt as Lindsey said,

"She's yours… her name is Bailey but you can change it if you want to." He handed the kitten to her saying, "So you like her?"

"She's so cute… oh my god… I'm melting over a kitten… this is turning into my worst nightmare…"

"Really?"

"Not with you… the cat's beautiful… but you forgot… Cordy lives with us too… is she OK with having a destructive ball of fluff running around all over our apartment?"

"Cordy loves her… she helped me pick her out… she's from the rescue centre over on fifth and hill… we figured you'd want a lap cat."

"She's not just mine… she's yours too… I want us to share… she can be…"

"Our baby?" he finished for her quietly.

She was silent for a moment, staring at the cat in her hands.

"Lindsey… I didn't mean… this is a cat…"

"I'm know you didn't… I'm sorry," he told her, slipping his arms around her to tickle the cat behind her ears, "We should talk. I've been so wrapped up in the wedding…"

"Since when did you start doing feelings?"

"Since when did you?"

"I've told you since… oh… clever…"

"I want you to talk to me… like you talk to Wesley…"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing… god, Lilah you're so touchy…"

"Touchy? I'm trying… you want me to be honest with you? When I was pregnant with Hannah I wanted to get rid of her. When Hannah was born I didn't feel a thing and now she's gone just like I wanted and all I can think about is getting her back…" Lindsey silently took Bailey from her, setting her down on the floor so he could pull Lilah to him properly.

"Better?" he asked, as he felt her body stiffen and then relax against him.

"Well you wanted me to be honest… a year ago my aim was to hurt you as much as I possibly could in one day… so maybe I was just attention seeking… maybe I've always loved you…"

"In the vein of all things honest… When I left… the first time around… you were all I could think about even though I vowed to leave everything in LA behind…"

"So you did come back for me?"

"I guess so…"

"Even though you were putting your life on the line?"

He didn't reply, shocked, as she for the first time initiated a loving hug that led to kissing that gradually deepened that led to Lindsey kissing at the skin underneath her arched throat.

He was surprised when she backed away from him, smoothing down her tangled hair and catching her breath again.

"Lindsey… we can't…" she told him.

"Lilah… are you having issues with us? With… sex?"

"No it's just… Christmas. Everyone's downstairs expecting to see the cat…"

"OK… fine… I'll ask you once more and if you say no I'll leave it and if you say yes we'll talk later. Are there issues for you with me and sex?"

"No…"

He was silent for a moment before hugging her again.

"I just want to know everything's going to be OK with us…" he said.

She didn't reply, taking comfort as she always did in his arms…