Doug's Eulogy By Tsvi We are all struggling to understand how this could happen. Though the medical community has provided some answers as to what happened physically, I do not believe that we will ever truly understand why. Nothing that is said today will dull the pain of our loss. The shock will lessen over time, but for now it seems impossible to even accept that Doug is no longer with us. I met Doug in the 7th grade in German class. It was at that time that the ‘gang’ started to form. None of us really fit the mold of the in crowd with Doug being the head non-conformist. It was a strange motley group that coalesced over the years to become the strange motley group who are here today. For most of us here Doug was our friend. for one lucky woman he was a boyfriend. He was also a nephew, a cousin, a lil’ brother, a big brother & son. Now Doug is more than that. In moving beyond life Doug has brought us all together. Something Doug was exceptional at in life. Just look at how many periods of Doug’s life are represented by people here. We have his current job, his previous job, previous previous job, college, high school, friends of family and family. I attribute that to his easy going good nature. It is our obligation, our honor and our joy to celebrate Doug’s life. The pain will not subside anytime soon, but all of us who knew Doug know that he would not want us depressed. He would want us to embiggen ourselves in a cromulet fashion. In (non Simpson) words he would want us to grow and enjoy our lives. In the last few days we have experienced so much grief, but at the same time we have been sharing so many memories of Doug. We begin to realize that although Doug’s life was cut too short, it was a full life. I have also come to realize that one of Doug’s great strengths was his ability to tell tales – which is unfortunate since few of us can tell Doug stories as well as he could. Doug was always looking to expand his mind. He was able to pick up other languages with incredible skill and ease. Yvonne was telling me how he was able to pick up Chinese phrases and manipulate them. This is with no formal training in the language that has a completely different alphabet. I was always amazed at how well he was able to speak German. How he could succeed at the highest levels of math. He told me after he got his Masters that his brain hurt and he needed to turn it off for a while. Now you all know how he got into computers. J He would do anything he could to feed that mind of his. Read books, learn about other cultures, try new food, travel, learn new technology and watch movies insatiably. And as many of you can attest to, Doug was always up for a good debate. If you were going to debate him in something you had better show up prepared. Those who came unprepared would get destroyed, but Doug would much rather discuss with someone who knows the subject and have an intelligent debate. These debates ranged from religious to technical. Of course sometime he would just bring something up to get under your skin. After hearing of Doug’s passing my dad pointed out to me that Doug always had a twinkle in his eye. Behind that twinkle is good nature, mischief and flat out brilliance. If you seen any of the pictures I am sure you will see it there too. One of the pictures at the viewing was of Doug at 5 years old. The look is there too – unmistakable. I have no doubt that Doug enjoyed life to the fullest. He was always traveling. Always up for a challenge. And although I am now breaking 2 1st rules of the club. We need to talk about fight club. Doug started the fight club in the gym at work. He and many unfortunate co-workers would wrestle until black and blue – and they loved it, going back for more and more. Just imagine the looks of people passing by….its amazing security was never called on them. On occasion Doug would play cricket with some of his Indian co-workers. I’m not sure if he ever quite understood the game, but that did not daunt him. It also became a way for him to extend friendship to many of the foreign co-workers. This was true for Doug at college and in high school too. He always made an effort to welcome those who felt less comfortable in American culture. We could go on endlessly about Doug. It just proves the point that he was a good man. Compassionate, easy going and smart. I will always be touched the way Doug took care of his lil’ sister Debbie. He would go out of his way, bend over backwards for her. I will always be touched by the love that Doug and Yvonne shared. It will always shine through. I will always be touched by the Doug’s dedication to his parents. Although split and living in different parts of the country, Doug took every opportunity to be with them. You were taken too early from us, but you are in a better place now. God be with you Doug. You are in our hearts and minds and we will miss you always. Reflections on Doug’s Life in Christ Scott Strickland at Doug’s Celebration of Life I knew Doug very well, for a short period of time, right at the end of his life. From talking to his mom, I know that Doug knew the Lord from a young age. He went to Sunday School, and at age 5, he cm home to his mom and said “I’ve heard about Jesus, and I have this little book called The Four Spiritual Laws”. And his mom went through the book with him, and he accepted Jesus as his Lord and Savior at that young age. At age 10, with his dad, he was baptized at the Baptist church he was going to in Texas. He then lived his life as a teenager and young adult, always knowing that God and Jesus was part of his life. Maybe he didn’t go to church every Sunday, or acknowledge his faith in everything he did, but it was always there. Doug had an illness when he was in college. Cancer struck a part of his body. He needed an operation to have some work done on his knee. That went well for a time, but then there was a sense that the cancer may be back, and that was a difficult thing to hear and experience. He was set for surgery, to go in and do another piece of work on his knee. Then his mom said “Before we do that, how would you like it if the Elders of my church prayed for you?” As Laurel described this to me, it didn’t take Doug long to say “Set it up, make it happen!”. So 10 years ago, he was prayed over, he went into the hospital that week, they looked for the problem, and nothing was there. And he had 9 or 10 more years of good health. God sets up things in our lives, to help us along the way, and to be there in times of need. When I was called to be with Doug this past Saturday, it was very clear where his mom got the direction for my presence. It’s from James, Chapter 5 – “Is any one of you in trouble? He should pray. Is anyone happy? Let him sing songs of praise. Is any one of you sick? You should call the elders of the church, to pray over him and anoint him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him up. If he has sinned, he will be forgiven. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray to each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.” This past Saturday night I was at home, it was Columbus Day weekend. I get a call around 7:15, it’s Laurel. I had not talked to or seen Laurel in 2 or 3 years. She said “My son is in the hospital, he’s very sick. I would like to have an Elder of the church come and pray with him” I’ve been an Elder of the church, but I’m not currently an Elder, so in good order I said “Let me call some of the current Elders and have someone come to the hospital in Newark and pray”. So, on Saturday night I called 4 Elders, but none were available, I couldn’t even reach any of them to tell them about the situation. So I called Laurel back and said “I’m coming. I have oil, and I’ll come and do the anointing”. I have to tell you that when I was an Elder, I made only 1 hospital visit, to someone who was not that sick. When my mother-in-law was dying in the hospital, my 2 teenage daughters went in the room with her, I stayed outside. But this time, I knew the Lord was calling me to be there – for my friend Laurel, for Doug, for the family, and for Him. So I drive to Newark, and I’m admitted as “clergy” to the Intensive Care area. I had to put on a lot of garb, because at that point they were not quite sure what was wrong with Doug, it could have been some type of infectious disease. So I donned my cap, double plastic gloves, goggles, face mask, and all kinds of robes. They wouldn’t even let me take the Bible in with me, because of the situation. But I had my oil. I walked in, said “Hi” to Laurel, it was the first time we had met in a couple of years, we hugged, and immediately we were brother and sister. She tells me what the situation is. I pray with her, and one of the things we pray is that “the Lord Jesus Christ is also in this room, in this very room with Doug”. I have the oil, I take the cap off, I can’t find a pocket to put it in since I have all this stuff on, and so I give Laurel the cap. I do the anointing, step back, and stay in the room another 4 or 5 minutes. I then step out of the room, take all my things off, pick up my Bible, and say to myself “Let me look at Psalm 23, a very comforting Psalm for these times”. I read – “The Lord is my Shepard, I shall not want, he makes me lie down in green pastures…. He anoints my head with oil” I say “OK, that’s why I’m here”. Laurel called me the next day. Doug is doing a bit better, she fills me in on some of the things that are happening I tell her the story of what happened when I literally touched Doug’s body, and she says to me “You need to write that down – now, while it’s fresh in your head”. So I wrote it down, and this is the story, right from my email: Dear Laurel:   Thank you for calling me yesterday to minister to your son Doug.  It is a great honor and humbling experience to be called to anoint someone with oil in their hour of need.  I thank God that he gives us His gifts to minister through the church in this way.   When I entered Doug's room at about 8:15 PM on Saturday, October 11, it was great to see you and your daughter.  It was special for us to renew our relationship as brothers and sisters in the Lord, even though we had not seen each other for several years.  We prayed together for Doug and both acknowledged that our Lord Jesus was in this very room with us.    I then moved to anoint Doug with oil.  I prayed "May the healing of your Lord Jesus Christ be on your body, mind, soul and spirit".  As I prayed I anointed his forehead with oil in the sign of the cross.  As I touched him, I felt his head rise up to press against my finger as I was anointing him.  I clearly felt a response from his body, mind, soul, and spirit to this anointing - a rising up to meet it, with a desire to accept it and be ministered to by it.    As we discussed on the phone today, I "was in the Way" God had established for Doug at this time.  I am thankful to God and you for allowing me to be part of this opportunity for His power and love to be made manifest as we follow his command: "Is any one of you sick?  He should call the elders of the church to pray over him and anoint him with oil in the name of the Lord (James 5:14)".   I also mentioned that I read the 23rd Psalm before leaving the hospital, and was struck by verse 5b, "You anoint me head with oil, my cup overflows".   I will continue to pray for you and Doug at this time.   In Christ's love,   Scott Strickland I want you to experience something. When I said “Doug’s head pressed against my finger”, he was comatose, and I wasn’t expecting any type of response. And, on Monday and Tuesday as I was praying, after Laurel asked me to speak at this service, I was praying “I would like to have the people experience what I experienced, and feel Doug’s presence, and the Lord’s presence, as I did”. And God even showed me a way to do that, which I’d like you to participate in. If you could, just touch your head with you index finger and make the sign of the cross on your forehead. You may not feel anything, and again, when I say Doug’s head moved and pushed up into my finger, it wasn’t like it came up off the bed a half inch or an inch, it was just a sense of movement. And literally, when I was praying about this, the sense was, if you just took your hand, hold it straight, and put the index finger from your opposite hand in the middle of your palm. Now separate your hands, and curl the fingers of your open palm in towards your palm. OK, now what I want you to do is as I say the prayer that I said to Doug, I want you to have your finger pressing into your open palm, and when I say “Amen”, curl your fingers (and you can sense the movement I felt as I prayed for him). “Doug, may the healing of your Lord Jesus Christ be upon your body, your mind, your soul, and your spirit. AMEN”.