"To stop the drip, turn cock to right'
Funny English in Thailand


We have a rather large collection of examples how English is being used in different parts of the world, including Thailand. If you read this and know of any other good and funny examples, then please email us. Here are a few of the gems we collected in recent years:

A conversation with room service:
Room Service: Morny, rune sor-bees.
Hotel Guest: Oh sorry, I thought I dialed room service.
Room Service: Rye, rune sore-bees. Morny. Jewish to ordor sunteen?
Hotel Guest: I'd like some bacon and eggs.
Room Service: Ow July then?
Hotel Guest: What?
Room Service: Aches. Ow July then? Pry, boy, pooch..?
Hotel Guest: Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry, Scrambled please.
Room Service: Ow July thee Baycome? Crease?
Hotel Guest: Crisp will be fine.
Room Service: Okay. An Santos?
Hotel Guest: Ugh.....I don't know....I don't think so.
Room Service: No? Judo one toes?
Hotel Guest: Look, I really feel bad about this, but I just don't know what judo-one toes means, I'm sorry.
Room Service: Toes! Toes! Why Jew Don Juan toes? Ow bow eengligh mopping we bother?
Hotel Guest: English Muffin! I've got it! Toast! You were saying toast! Fine. An English Muffin will be fine.
Room Service: We Bother?
Hotel Guest: No, just put the bother on the side.
Room Service: Wad?
Hotel Guest: I'm sorry. I meant butter. Butter on the side.
Room Service: Copy?
>Hotel Guest: I feel terrible about this, but ....
Room Service: Copy. Copy, tea, mill.
Hotel Guest: Coffee! Yes coffee please. And that's all.
Room Service: One minnie. Ass rune torino-fie, strangle aches, crease Baycome, tossy eengligh mopping we bother honey sight, and copy. Rye?
Hotel Guest: Whatever you say.
Room Service: Okay, Tenjewberrymud.
Hotel Guest: You're welcome.


Learn Korean in 5 Minutes
(Must Read Out Loud)

01) That's not right..............................Sum Ting Wong
02) Are you harbouring a fugitive.................Hu Yu Hai Ding
03) See me ASAP...................................Kum Hia
04) Stupid Man....................................Dum Gai
05) Small Horse...................................Tai Ni Po Ni
06) Did you go to the beach.......................Wai Yu So Tan
07) I bumped the coffee table.....................Ai Bang Mai Ni
08) I think you need a face lift..................Chin Tu Fat
09) It's Very dark in here........................Wao So Dim
10) I Thought you were on a diet..................Wai Yu Mun Ching
11) This is a tow away zone.......................No Pah King
12) Our meeting is scheduled for next week........Wai Yu Kum Nao
13) Staying out of sight..........................Lei Ying Lo
14) He's cleaning his automobile .................Wa Shing Ka
15) Your body odour is offensive..................Yu Stin Ki Pu
16) Great.........................................Fa Kin Su Pah
17) Give it to me baby............................Suk Mai Dong
18) Germany will win the World Cup................No Fu Kin Wai
19) Whos been eating all the pies?................Yo Fat Wan

 

Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please.
If you are not person to do such thing is please not to read notis

Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily

The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid

The lift is being fixed for the next day.
During that time we regret that you will be unbearable

Outside a tailor shop: Ladies may have a fit upstairs

Another tailor shop: Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotations

Advertisement by dentist: Teeth extracted by the latest methodists

Advertisement for donkey rides: Would you like to ride on your own ass?

To stop the drip, turn cock to right

At a restaurant: Special today -- no ice cream

In a Bangkok temple: It is forbidden to enter a woman
even a foreigner if dressed as a man

Ticket office: We take your bags and send them in all directions

Two signs from a souvenir shop entrance:
English well talking
Here speeching American

Furthermore the entire site you are visiting now is full of funny English!
(mainly because I am Dutch and English is not my native language).

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