FOREVER YOUNG

PAUL ANTHONY ROBICHAUX

YOU CAME INTO THIS WORLD SO BEAUTIFUL AND HAPPY. OUR BLONDE HAIRED, GREEN EYED BUNDLE OF JOY. YOU WERE SO INTENSE, EVEN AS A LITTLE CHILD, ASKING SO MANY QUESTIONS! YOU WALKED AT NINE MONTHS, AND THEN YOU STARTED RUNNING EVERY WHERE. YOU WERE ALWAYS FIVE STEPS AHEAD OF ME. YOUR MIND ALWAYS AMAZED ME, UNTIL I FOUND OUT YOUR WERE GIFTED. THEN I UNDERSTOOD YOU WOULD ALWAYS BE TEN STEPS AHEAD OF ME. REMEMBER HOW YOU PLAYED DEAD AND WE ALL HAD TO CRY AND BEG YOU TO COME BACK?

YOUR PATIENCE WITH OLD PEOPLE, AND COMPASSION FOR THEM WAS SO BEYOND YOUR YEARS. BUT, PERHAPS YOU KNEW YOU WOULDN'T BE HERE LONG. YOU WENT THRU ALL THE BUMPS AND KNOCKS OF A NORMAL LITTLE BOY, AND OH HOW I WORRIED. WE DID THE CUB SCOUTS TOGETHER. I TOOK YOU FISHING WHEN YOUR DAD WAS AT SEA. I PRAYED YOU WOULD CATCH A FISH, AND THEN FINALLY YOU DID, BUT IT GOT AWAY. I BROKE THE AXLE ON MY LINCOLN TRYING TO GET IT UNSTUCK, AND WE FELL IN THE MUD LAUGHING! THERE WAS SO MANY GOOD MEMORIES AND SOME WHEN I WANTED TO PINCH YOUR HEAD OFF. BUT I WAS SO PROUD OF WHAT A GOOD, AND TENDER PERSON YOU WERE.

YOU MET A BEAUTIFUL YOUNG LADY AND I WAS SO PROUD. YOU WERE GOING TO GET MARRIED AND START ON THAT BUNCH OF GRANDCHILDREN I USE TO TALK ABOUT. YOU KNOW WHEN EVERY ONE HAD FAMILY FOR THANKSGIVING AND WE WOULD SEE ALL THE CARS AROUND HOMES AND WE HAD NONE. WE WOULD DAYDREAM ABOUT YOU ALL COMING HOME WITH A CAR LOAD OF GRANDCHILDREN AND WE WOULD REMINISCE ABOUT THE GOOD OLD DAYS.

YOU COULD RIDE HORSES OTHER PEOPLE COULDN'T OR WOULDN'T DARE. YOU SAID, "THEY ARE JUST FRIGHTENED. WHEN THEY KNOW I AM THIER FRIEND THEY WILL TRUST ME AND THEN THE FUN BEGINS!" YOU COULD QUOTE SHAKESPEARE FOR HOURS, AND PLAY ALMOST ANYTHING YOU PICKED UP. WHAT A CONTRADICTION, LOVED SHAKESPEARE AND GARTH BROOKS.

THEN THE CALL CAME, YOU HAD BEEN CRUSHED, BY A DRUNKEN BOAT OPERATOR, COULD I COME TO NEW ORLEANS IMMEDIATELY. I NEVER GOT TO HEAR YOUR VOICE, YOU WERE ON THE RESPIRATOR WHEN I GOT THERE. THEY SAID YOU HAD SOMETHING YOU HAD TO TELL ME, YOU HAD CALLED YOUR DAD THE NIGHT BEFORE, AND OVER THE AIR, FOR ALL THE BOATS TO HEAR, YOU SAID, "DAD I LOVE YOU." DID YOU KNOW? MY CALL WAS TO COME THE NEXT DAY, BUT YOU NEVER GOT TO MAKE IT. YOU MOUTHED I LOVE YOU, BUT WHAT I WOULD HAVE GIVEN TO HEAR YOU SAY IT, JUST ONCE!

I COULDN'T LET YOU KNOW HOW BAD IT WAS. ONCE I SHED ONE TEAR WHILE I WAS KISSING YOUR HAND AND YOUR BLOOD PRESSURE SHOT STRAIGHT UP! SO, I HAD TO PRETEND IT WAS GOING TO BE ALRIGHT. I PRAYED SO HARD, BUT THEN, AFTER BEING UP FOR SO LONG, I WENT TO THE MOTEL. WHILE I READ MY BIBLE THE WORDS SPRANG FROM THE PAGE, "THE RAIN FALLS TO THE GROUND NEVER TO RISE AGAIN." AND I KNEW, I CRIED, I BEGGED, I PLEADED, AND THEN FINALLY I SAID, "GOD, IF YOU ARE NOT GOING TO HEAL HIM TAKE HIM, DON'T LET HIM SUFFER, THY WILL BE DONE NOT MINE." I DRESSED AND THEY RUSHED TO GET ME THERE. HALF WAY BACK I LOOKED AT MY WATCH AND SAID, "SLOW DOWN, ITS TOO LATE HE'S JUST LEFT FOR HOME." I WAS RIGHT. I HOPED I WAS WRONG BUT I KNEW.

DID HE COME TO GREET YOU AS HE DID WHEN I LEFT THAT TIME? YOU HEARD ME TALK ABOUT THAT SO MANY TIMES. DID YOU SEE THE GRASS THAT HAD MUSIC IN IT THAT TRAVELED UP TO YOUR FEET? AND THE FLOWERS THAT CHANGED COLORS EVERY FEW SECONDS. WHAT ABOUT THE FOUNTAINS WHERE THE WATER POURED OVER SHIMMERING ROCKS OF GOLD; WAS IT AS I USE TO TELL YOU? YOUR FATHER DREAMED OF YOU AND YOU WERE TAKING A GROUP OF CHILDREN TO A BARN TO FEED THE BABY ANIMALS. HE SAID YOU WERE SO HAPPY AND THE CHILDREN WERE LAUGHING AND SINGING, EXCEPT FOR ONE. YOU SCOOPED HER UP IN YOUR ARMS, AND BEFORE LONG, SHE WAS LAUGHING TOO. I KNOW OUR TIME APART WON'T BE LONG, BUT IT SEEMS LONG AT TIMES. YOUR STILL TEN STEPS AHEAD OF YOUR MOMA AND DADDY.

THEY PLAYED THE RIVER BY GARTH BROOKS AT YOUR FUNERAL, THE WHOLE TOWN TURNED OUT. I MET PEOPLE I HAD NEVER MET BEFORE. THEY SAID YOU WERE THEIR FRIEND. I FOUND OUT ABOUT THE LADY YOU STOPPED TO HELP WHEN SHE WAS BROKE DOWN AND THE RUFFIANS HAD STOPPED. I MET THE GIRL YOU LEAD TO THE LORD. THERE WAS SO MUCH YOU NEVER TOLD. THE FUNERAL HOME WAS PACKED, YOU SAID NO ONE WOULD COME, BUT PEOPLE HAD TO STAND. WHEN THEY PLAYED THE RIVER EVRYONE IN THE CHAPEL BEGAN TO SING, WE ENDED WITH HE IS RISEN, LOTS OF MUSIC. SINCE YOU LOVED IT SO. THEN THE REALITY OF IT SET IN.

I WENT TO THE CEMETARY EVERY DAY. BUT YOU WERE NOT THERE. I CRIED AND I PRAYED FOR A SIGN FOR SOME PEACE. I READ STORYS OF OTHER MOTHERS GETTING SIGNS, BUT I GOT NONE. I WRESTLED WITH GOD, I BEGGED, I PLEADED, I BARGAINED. STILL NO SIGN, EVERY BIRTHDAY I ASKED FOR A DREAM, EVERY CHRISTMAS. ONLY SILENCE. THEN I KNEW, WOULD I STILL BELIEVE IF I GOT NO SIGN. BLESSED IS HE WHO BELIEVES THAT DID NOT PUT THEIR FINGER IN HIS SIDE. AND I KNEW I WOULD HAVE TO ACCEPT ON FAITH THAT ONE DAY WE WOULD WADE IN THE GOLDEN STREAMS, AND YOU WILL GIVE ME THE GRAND TOUR. THAT YOUR FATHER AND I WILL SEE YOUR SMILING FACE ONCE AGAIN! AND YOU WILL SAY, "I BEAT YOU HERE, I WAS FIRST." JUST AS YOU ALWAYS DID! 'TILL WE MEET OVER THERE, TAKE A PEEK WITH THE CLOUD OF WITNESSES, AND SEE HOW YOUR MOM AND DAD ARE DOING. SEE WE DIDN'T GIVE UP THE RACE. WE ARE STILL IN THE BATTLE AND WE WILL BE OVERCOMERS!