Davy: "He's been out in the sun too long."
Micky: "Well, he was no bargain in the shade."

Davy: "Mike, would you excuse me for a second?"
Mike: "Au contraire."

Micky: "It's working, it's working!"
Mike: "How do ya know, how do ya know?"
Micky: "I saw the last scene, I saw the last scene!"

Davy: "What'd you do that for I didn't say anything?"
Mike: "Well, that's in case you do."

Micky: "Would you like a pinch in the mouth?"
Waitress: "I'll think about it."
Micky: "Don't hurt yourself."

Davy: "Knock knock."
Mike: "Whose there?"
Davy: "Wa."
Mike: "Wa who?"
Davy: "That's right, Wahoo!"

Mikcy and Davy: "Together we will find ourselves in places we don't have any business being!"

Army General: "Where's she going?"
Mike: "I give up where?"

Peter: "What did I do?"
Mike: "I don't know man but don't do it again."

Micky: "What's the name of that band. You know the one with the blood and the makeup?"
Davy: "Kiss?"
Micky: "No thanks. You know they have the high heels and the guy has a nine foot tongue, what is their name?"
Mike: "Kiss?"
Micky: "No, but Davy wants one."

Davy: "How old are you?"
Princess: "I don't know."

Boxing Comissioner: "Do you know the thing closest to my heart?"
Micky, Peter, and Mike in unison: "Your lungs."

Mike: "Remember these three little words 'Don't Argue.'"
Peter: "That's two words."
Mike: "See, your starting already."

Micky: "Talk? Never, you can torture him, beat him, drug, him. He'll never talk. There's only one torture he can't withstand. I pray they don't use that."
Ballerina: "What's that?"
Micky: "It's a direct question."

Micky: "My arms! I can't move my arms!"
Mike: "I can't move your arms either."

Micky: "What's your sign?"
Mike: "Wheat."

Gambler: "Alright, let's talk turkey."
Monkees: "Gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble."

Davy: "The thing that threw me was.....wait I was really carried away."
Peter: "The silence through you."
Davy: "...the thing that threw me....was Micky's reading."
Mike: "Carried away? Man, I don't want to know, carried away."
Davy: "That whole thing just blew my mind."

Micky: "Chew carefully. How're ya gonna be president if you don't chew carefully?"
Peter: "I don't wanna be president!"
Micky: "Shh! Don't talk with your mouth full!"

Mike: "El Dolenzio, what are you doing?"
Micky: "I just try to mingle!"

Micky: "I read every book in the entire public library."
Mike: "So what did you learn?"
Micky: "The duodecimal system."

Peter: "Our honor has been smearched"
Mike: "What?"
Peter: "Smurped,"
Mike: "What?,"
Peter: "Be-dirtied,"
Mike: "What?,"
Peter: "Well, they hurt my feelings!"

Peter: "Everyone is where they want to be right?"
Micky: "That's a very inept thing to say, Peter, considering the fact that we are in a vaccuum cleaner."

Peter: "What do you got on under that thing?"
Davy: "Same as you Mate!"

Micky: "Hi, where you going?"
Davy: "I'm going to my Grandmother's house."
Micky: "Just a hunch, your Grandma's been eaten by a big bad wolf."
Davy: "I know."
Micky: "Oh, so where are you going?"
Davy: "My other Grandmother's house."

Mike: "You know, we haven’t worked in a month?!"
Peter: "Gee, it seems more like four weeks!"

Davy: "Would you care for a spot of tea?"
Micky: "I’d rather have a whole cup!"

Micky: "All right, stick ‘em up!"
Mike: "Help, help, help, robbery, who is this masked man anyway, help, help, gun, oh terror terror, burglar, burglar, help, help, help, wallet mine, his now, gun..."

Micky: "Um, I'm gonna run down to the store and buy some dogfood."
Davy: "Hey, hey, wait, wait, we don't have a dog."
Micky: "Oh, well, I'll run down to the store and pick up a dog, too, dogs are nice, you know, you can pet 'em, and love 'em, and take fleas off of 'em, and put fleas back on 'em, and besides that, dogs play with cats and, and, we don't have a cat either, um, bye."

---

Back to the Index

Want us to add your favorite Monkee Men quote? Feel like nit-picking on our mistakes? E-mail us!