Continued
"Them?"
"Blonde, pretty?"
I frowned, butting in. "Hey, I'm blonde! I'm pretty!"
AJ leaned forward. "Big boobs."
"Oh. Forgot about those."
AJ smirked. "Brian doesn't."
I thought about it for a minute and AJ must have seen the change on my face because I suddenly found his hand on my shoulder.
"Damn, Nick, I'm really sorry. You love him, he loves you and I'm guessing he loves Leighanne too."
"Bingo."
AJ stood up, quietly gazing down at me.
"Oh God, here we go. You're gonna say something deep, aren't you? Aren't you? I don't wanna hear it."
AJ pried my hands off my ears. "Nick."
I covered them again.
"Nick!!"
Boy, he slaps hard. "Ow! Dammit! What?"
"You gotta let him go."
I could feel the tears welling up and I glared at him. "No."
AJ rubbed his neck wearily then crouched down on his haunches to get eye level, speaking softly at me. "Nick, you have to. He loves her. He's married to her."
"So?" I spat out harshly. "What's that got to do with anything?"
AJ grabbed my arm. "Everthing!" He shook me. "Everything! You know Brian wants kids! A home! How are you gonna provide that? Huh?"
I winced as he shouted the words at me, ripping my arm away from his grip. "I don't know! I just know that he loves me! Me! More than her!"
"More than her?" I could hear the disbelief in his voice and I turned away. "What? Did he say that? Did he? Did Brian say he loves you more? Nick, did he say yes? "
Part III
I nervously stood waiting in the back of the room, ignoring the excited chatter, not sure why I had come. Well sure, I knew why. It had been three years since I had seen him. Three years. And three years since the Backstreet Boys had called it quits, just after we finished our Black and Blue tour. We all knew it was coming; strange that nobody else did. It probably had to do with us always touting that we were a group, that we'd always stick together. I can still hear AJ's sarcastic voice. "Stick together? Yeah, right. Stick this up your ass, okay?" He then flipped everyone off and that was the last we saw of him. Oh, we heard from him all right. Eight years of being together didn't mean he completely wrote us off. He called occasionally, asking how I was doing. How was I doing? I thought about it for a moment before answering with the same reply I always gave. Okay. I had to smile as I saw him flirting with some girl over in the corner. Same old AJ. Thank God some things remained the same.
My eye caught Howie the instant he walked through the door, shaking hands with all the PR men who were so desperately trying for us to make a comeback. Right, sure. Like Howie would agree. He never felt like he was a part of the group and we were shocked when he announced it, angrily, citing the many valid reasons why. Like AJ, he had stormed off, wanting nothing to do with the group ever again. I guess I can't blame him. Still, why was he here?
I heard Kevin call my name and I tried to glance around the people that were in my way. I finally saw him and nodded hello. We didn't really need to talk; out of the four he and I always kept in touch. I wondered how he liked living in California, wondered what it would be like to move so far west. I scanned the crowd, hoping to see if Kristin was with him, but like so many times before, she was a no-show. Not that I was surprised. Kevin and Kristin always did have a strange marriage.
Shaking my head no, I declined the drink offered to me knowing I'd be too nervous to hold it steady. I glanced down at my shoes, suddenly ill at ease. What the hell was I doing here? What was I thinking? I knew I was dying to see him, hell, I had been dying inside, little by little, each day, each year, knowing that he was lost to me forever. I heard a small commotion by the front door and brought my gaze up to see what was going on. There he was. I tried to stop from gawking, but I couldn't. He was just as I remembered him, just as I pictured him so many times in my mind. Easy smile. Laughing. Charming and silly as ever. I thought my heart was going to explode. Nothing had changed. Nothing. If possible, I loved him more than ever.
He was suddenly swarmed by people and I just stood back and watched, watched as people slapped his shoulder, shook his hand, called out his name. His name. I remembered the way he said mine, the gasps of pleasure as he yelled my name when we...I shook my head, angered by how vivid it was. After all this time, I can still see him, hear him, taste him.
Trying to push it out of my mind, I concentrated on finding her but I couldn't. I had heard all the rumors, read all the tabloids about her pregnancy, how unhappy she had been to find out she was pregnant now that her career was taking off. Basically she had let him raise the boy by himself and I felt myself splinter into little pieces as I saw him swinging his son up high in the air, making him squeal in delight. He looked so happy, so proud holding him in his arms. I couldn't blame him. Seeing his son made me realize just how much I wished for one of my own, how thrilled I'd be if I had a child as adorable as his.
Fat chance. Since the breakup of the group, life just kept on its downward spiral. I tried like crazy to keep things the same, to keep everyone happy, but somewhere down the line I gave up, or was it the other way around? Who knows? I just knew that after three years I saw my life, my dreams, my hopes crushed, forever shattered. I wondered if he knew. I wondered if he cared.
I looked down as I felt a small bump then a grab on my leg. There he was, his boy, and I drew my breath in surprise. Blonde, blue eyes. Just like him. The spitting image. I crouched down to look at him, noticing his mouth was smeared with chocolate. I had to laugh and with a foolish grin he smiled back.
"Here, let me get that for you," I offered, wiping his mouth gently with a napkin. He resisted and ran away, weaving through a sea of legs. Shaking my head in humor I stood up and looked into another pair of blue eyes. Gorgeous blue eyes. They seemed to be piercing right through me. I couldn't stand it. I had to look away. But he didn't move, didn't say a word, just waited. Waited. I finally met his eyes again, fearful that my own would fill up with sadness. He beat me to it. The sorrow, the pain, I saw it all in his eyes. I flicked my own to the right, noticing that AJ had stopped talking to the girl and was watching us intently. Damn AJ. Always interested in somebody else's business. I turned back fearfully, not sure if I could stand to see the agony in his eyes again. I saw something else. His eyes had changed. They were warm, loving, and they were for me.
He said something, and I froze in shock, not believing him. Something that shook me to my very soul.
"What?" I asked wildly, my heart pounding with excitement, "what did you say, Nick?"
Nick swept his son in his arms, giving his little boy a quick kiss. Setting him back down, we watched as Nick's son scampered away again.
Nick turned to me, his eyes full of love.
"Brian, say yes."
*****************************************
Author's note:
Okay, I just have to know. Did I surprise you with the ending? Did you think it was Nick's POV instead of Brian's in Part III? Confused? Go read the last part again. I'll wait.