CHAPTER ONE - CAN YOU SEE ME?

The only reason he noticed her at all during their first concert was because she sat, not moving throughout the entire show. It amused him to see her sitting calmly, smack dab in the middle of the front row, with out so much as a twitch. He knew how desirable front row tickets were, many a fan or fan's parent had spent hundreds, even thousands of dollars to see them wink, dance and sing directly at them. They screamed, they cried, they stood and danced the whole concert. She did none of that. If it had not been the first show of their Black and Blue tour he would have spent more time watching her, fascinated. Unfortunately, opening shows always held their share of mishaps, bad timing, and general craziness and it required his utmost attention. He reluctantly concentrated on his performance, wondering if he would ever get a chance to observe her again, dying to ask the other guys after the concert what they had thought of her. He knew they would be talking, laughing about her until their next concert, when some other incident would capture their attention and make her fade from their minds.

* * * * *

"What do you mean, you didn't see her?"

Nick shrugged, taking a sip of his bottled water and wiping his still sweating forehead with a hand towel. "I didn't see her. Where was she?"

Brian looked at his friend in disbelief. "The front row. The very middle. Come on, Nick, you're joking, right? I mean, she was right there, just sitting!"

Nick flopped back on the cool leather couch, savoring its softness. "If you say so, Bri. I really wasn't looking. Besides, how can you see just one girl sitting, when thousands are jumping up and down?"

Brian frowned, biting his lip in frustration. "Because she was in the front row," he said tightly, turning his attention to Howie who had just entered the dressing room.

"Anybody seen my bag?" he questioned, looking around.

"Howie, back me up, man. You saw her, right?"

Howie walked around the room, pushing Nick's legs off the coffee table, hoping to find his duffel bag under Nick's outstretched legs. "Saw who?" he replied, not really listening.

"The girl, the girl in the front row!'

"Oh, yeah, I saw her. Man, was she hot! I don't think she stopped dancing once!"

"No! Not that one!" Brian did remember her. "The other one! The one who sat through the whole damn concert!"

"Whoa, Bri, chill. I didn't see anyone sitting in front. But who cares when you could have been looking at the other?" He gave a small wolf whistle, smirking at Nick.

Nick grinned at Brian, giving him a "aww, sorry" look. Brian shook his head, questioning why he even bothered trying to get them interested in the strange girl. Obviously neither of them cared, or else they would have noticed.

It made him wonder why he did.

* * * * *

She was there.

It was their next concert, and there she was, sitting, not moving, as if she had transported herself from the very same spot at the last show to this one. Brian had noticed her after their first big production number, Everyone, just as they were ready to sing the next song. He froze for a moment, in doubt, wondering if he was just imagining it; maybe it was some other girl who just happened to be sitting down. He peered closer. It wasn't. It was her.

Determined to show Nick he wasn't crazy, he decided on their next break to force Nick to look her way. It wasn't hard. Again, she was the only one sitting down, front row, center. They finished Shining Star to piercing screams and applause and Brian grabbed Nick's arm excitedly.

"She's here," he hissed.

Nick looked at him, startled by Brian's harsh grip. "Who?"

"The girl! The girl in the middle! The one who just sits!"

"Oh."

The music was starting up and Brian shook his head, exasperated at Nick's lack of enthusiasm. "I want you to check it out!"

"Okay, okay!" Nick replied, noting Brian's insistent stare. "Jeez." Fortunately for Brian, the next song began with Nick, so the youngest Backstreet singer moved freely around the stage, peering intently. Nick threw Brian a slight questioning look and Brian nodded, encouraged.

Finally! He sees her! By the look on his face, he's curious too!

Nick hopped down from the end of the stage, bodyguards watching him and the front row fans carefully as Nick proceeded to race from one end to the other, his hand outstretched, fingertips just barely grazing fingertips of the adoring fans. He easily jumped back on stage, coming over to give Brian a shake of his head. Brian grinned, satisfied. Nick had seen her. He could hardly wait until the show was over to talk about it.

* * * * * *

"I can't believe you didn't see her! Jeez, Nick, you nodded your head to me after you came back up on stage!"

"Bri, I shook my head, not nodded! Listen, I don't know what you saw, but there was no one sitting in the front row. You need your eyes checked!"

Brian stopped in mid-swig of his bottled water, then pointed it at Nick, like a warning finger. "I do not. She was right there, right there, and you were just too dumb to notice!"

Nick glared at Brian, pissed. "Ya know, I don't know why I even bothered." He glanced at Kevin, who had been listening quietly to the whole thing. "Why don't you tell old Kev here what you saw? Maybe he'll give a damn, because I sure as hell don't!" Nick pushed himself off the chair he was sitting in and left, closing the door with a none-too-subtle slam.

Brian turned to his cousin, his blue eyes firm with determination. "I saw her. I saw her again. She didn't move an inch. Not one inch, Kevin. You must have seen her. Right in the middle of the front row."

Kevin shook his head apologetically "Sorry, Brian. I didn't." He got up from the couch and stretched, nodding his head towards the door, indicating it was time for them to leave and head back to the hotel. "Why is this bugging you so? It's no big deal."

Brian followed him out, heading down the hallway. It was a big deal. He just wasn't sure why.

* * * * *

"Okay, now I've had it!" fumed Brian in exasperation. He turned to look at the other four, his face livid. "Funny joke, ha ha. I get it now. This is some kind of prank, right?"

Brian pointed at Nick. "Is this payback for the time I locked you out of your hotel room half-naked?"

Nick stared at him, his mouth ajar. "Brian! That happened uh, like six months ago! You know I woulda got even with you sooner than now!"

Brian frowned sourly at Nick, his face still showing disbelief. Shaking his head, Nick threw a concerned look at the others, at a loss with his friend's puzzling behavior. Brian caught it. "You think I'm making this all up?" he demanded, his voice now starting to rise in indignation.

"Brian, man, all we're saying is we didn't see her! You saw her, we didn't!" explained AJ calmly.

Howie came over to slap a reassuring hand on Brian's shoulder. "Hey, it's probably just some wacky fan who managed to get front row tickets to our first three shows. Now that we're heading out of town, what are the odds she'll be there in Charlotte? Hmm? A million-to-one?"

* * * * * *

The million-to-one odd was sitting quietly in her seat, front row, dead center. In shock, Brian missed a step, almost fell, and if not for the quick hands of Howie, he would of. Brian flashed him a quick look of alarm, nodding his head frantically in the girl's direction, but Howie mistook Brian's glance for one of thanks and continued singing.

Maddened by his inability to get anyone's attention, Brian decided to take matters into his own hands, determined to have a good look at her. Easier said than done. The sequence of their songs, the smoke, fireworks and flashes of light made it almost impossible for him to see her clearly for more than a few seconds. Frustrated, Brian suddenly perked up, an idea coming to mind. The bridge! Yes! Once he was on the bridge, heading back to the front stage, he'd be able to get a better look, maybe even grab one of the guys and single her out! In fact, it was perfect; they used that bridge to wave and point to the fans anyway. So if he just happened to spend all his time near the front row, it wouldn't look out of place, would it? Pleased with his scheme, Brian waited impatiently, positive that if he was just able to pinpoint her, to study her, he could figure it all out. And most importantly, make the guys see that he wasn't crazy, that she was there, that she was sitting.

Finally! It seemed to take forever, that they would never be finished singing from the back stage. He noticed Nick occasionally throwing him a few strange glances but Brian ignored him, satisfied that in just a few minutes Nick would understand what Brian had been talking about. The bridge lowered for their trek back to the front and Brian gleefully jumped on first, reaching with a strong grip to grab Nick. Almost half-dragging, half-pulling his friend, Brian ran excitedly towards the front, leaving the other three to tend to the rest of the arena.

Nick reluctantly followed, Brian seeing the hesitation, the doubt of oh God, what is Brian doing? in Nick's face and posture. Brian didn't care. Singing the song "Time" to the crowd, Brian scanned the first row, his heart caught in his throat when for an instant he couldn't locate her. But then he saw her, as usual, sitting. Elated, Brian turned to show Nick, only to find him leaning on the opposite side of the railing, waving and singing to the crowd. Brian circled his fingers around Nick's upper arm and unceremoniously tugged him over to his side.

Disregarding his friend's dark look, Brian pointed her out, turning to give Nick a self-satisfied smirk. He kept on singing with Nick, giving Nick all the time he needed to scope her out. Pleased that his friend had now seen her, Brian turned to give Nick an I told you so! look. What he got instead was a blank stare, followed by the narrowing of Nick's blue eyes, filled with impatience and annoyance. Nick brushed by Brian abruptly, his action speaking louder than words. Not only had Nick not seen her, he now thought Brian was insane. Turning in disbelief, Brian was barely able to mouth the words to the song, too flustered to do anything but stare at her, sitting, her hands folded almost timidly in her lap. Desperate, Brian leaned over the metal railing, willing her, forcing her mentally to look at him. As if on cue, she did, twisting her head in his direction. Large orbs of blackness stared calmly back at him, eyes of no depth but of such darkness that Brian felt a cold chill run through him. The erratic lights from the stage, reflecting flecks of red and orange, made her eyes glow with an eerie sparkle. A slow smile began to take shape, her mouth opening wide as if to speak. But that too was filled with blackness, a dark, gaping hole, widening, spreading till it seemed to encompass her whole face. Gradually it shrank, becoming normal, a petite smile that fit her petite face. Taken aback, Brian stopped singing and stumbled towards the stage, breaking into a run, ignoring the startled looks of the other four as he ran backstage.