The Golden Asse
by Lucius Apuleius
Adlington's translation, 1566
THE EIGHTH BOOKE
THE THIRTY-SECOND CHAPTER
How a young man came
and declared the miserable death of Lepolemus and his wife Charites.
About midnight came a young man, which
seemed to be one of the family of the good woman Charites, who sometimes
endured so much misery and calamity with mee amongst the theeves, who after
that he had taken a stoole, and sate downe before the fireside, in the company
of the servants, began to declare many terrible things that had happened unto
the house of Charites, saying: O yee house-keepers, shepheards and cowheards,
you shall understand that wee have lost our good mistris Charites miserably
and by evill adventure: and to the end you may learne and know all the whole
matter, I purpose to tell you the circumstances of every point, whereby such
as are more learned then I (to whom fortune hath ministred more copious stile)
may painte it out in paper in forme of an History. There was a young Gentleman
dwelling in the next City, borne of good parentage, valiant in prowesse, and
riche in substance, but very much given and adicted to whorehunting, and
continuall revelling. Whereby he fell in company with Theeves, and had his
hand ready to the effusion of humane blood; his name was Thrasillus. The
matter was this according to the report of every man. Hee demanded Charites in
marriage, who although he were a man more comely than the residue that wooed
her, and also had riches abundantly, yet because he was of evill fame, and a
man of wicked manners and conversation, he had the repulse and was put off by
Charites, and so she married with Lepolemus. Howbeit this young man secretly
loved her, yet moved somewhat at her refusall, hee busily searched some meanes
to worke his damnable intent. And (having found occasion and opportunity to
accomplish his purpose, which he had long time concealed) brought to passe,
that the same day that Charites was delivered by the subtill meane and valiant
audacity of her husband, from the puissance of the Theeves, he mingled
himselfe among the assembly. faining that he was glad of the new marriage, and
comming home againe of the maiden, whereby (by reason that he came of so noble
parents) he was received and entertained into the house as one of their chiefe
and principall friends: Howbeit under cloake of a faithfull welwiller, hee
dissimuled his mischievous mind and intent: in continuance of time by much
familiarity and often conversation and banketting together, he fell more and
more in favour, like as we see it fortuneth to Lovers, who first doe little
delight themselves in love: till as by continuall acquaintance they kisse and
imbrace each other. Thrasillus perceiving that it was a hard matter to breake
his minde secretly to Charites, whereby he was wholly barred from the
accomplishment of his luxurious appetite, and on the other side perceiving
that the love of her and her husband was so strongly lincked together, that
the bond betweene them might in no wise be dissevered, moreover, it was a
thing impossible to ravish her, although he had consented thereto, yet hee
still provoked forward by vehement lust, when as hee saw himselfe unable to
bring his purpose to passe. Howbeit at length the thing which seemed so hard
and difficill, thorough [sic] hope of his fortified love, did now appeare
easie and facill: but marke I pray you diligently to what end the furious
force of his inordinate desire came. On a day Lepolemus went to the chase with
Thrasillus, to hunt for Goates, for his wife Charites desired him earnestly to
meddle with no other beasts, which were of more fierce and wilde nature. When
they were come within the chase to a great thicket fortressed about with
bryers and thornes, they compassed round with their Dogs and beset every place
with nets: by and by warning was given to let loose. The Dogs rushed in with
such a cry, that all the Forrest rang againe with the noyse, but behold there
leaped out no Goat, nor Deere, nor gentle Hinde, but an horrible and dangerous
wild Boare, hard and thicke skinned, bristeled terribly with thornes, foming
at the mouth, grinding his teeth, and looking direfully with fiery eyes. The
Dogs that first set upon him, he tare and rent with his tuskes, and then he
ranne quite through the nets, and escaped away. When wee saw the fury of this
beast, wee were greatly stricken with feare, and because wee never accustomed
to chase with such dreadfull Boares, and further because we were unarmed and
without weapons, we got and hid our selves under bushes and trees. Then
Thrasillus having found opportunity to worke his treason, said to Lepolemus:
What stand we here amazed? Why show we ourselves like
dastards [*]?
Why leese we so worthy a prey with our feminine hearts?
Let us mount upon our Horses, and pursue him incontinently: take you a hunting
staffe, and I will take a chasing speare. By and by they leaped upon their
Horses, and followed the beast. But hee returning against them with furious
force, pryed with his eyes, on whom he might first assayle with his tuskes:
Lepolemus strooke the beast first in the back with his hunting staffe.
Thrasillus faining to ayde and assist him, came behind, and cut off the hinder
legs of Lepolemus Horse, in such sort that hee fell downe to the ground with
his master: and sodainly the Boare came upon Lepolemus and furiously tare and
rent him with his teeth. Howbeit, Thrasillus was not sufficed to see him thus
wounded, but when he desired his friendly help, he thrust Lepolemus through
the right thigh with his speare, the more because he thought the wound of the
speare would be taken for a wound of the Boars teeth, then he killed the beast
likewise. And when he was thus miserably slaine, every one of us came out of
our holes, and went towards our slaine master. But although that Thrasillus
was joyfull of the death of Lepolemus, whom he did greatly hate, yet he cloked
the matter with a sorrowfull countenance, he fained a dolorous face, he often
imbraced the body which himselfe slew, he played all the parts of a mourning
person, saving there fell no teares from his eyes. Thus hee resembled us in
each point, who verily and not without occasion had cause to lament for our
master, laying all the blame of this homicide unto the Boare. Incontinently
after the sorrowfull newes of the death of Lepolemus, came to the eares of all
the family, but especially to Charites, who after she had heard such pitifull
tydings, as a mad and raging woman, ran up and down the streets, crying and
howling lamentably. All the Citizens gathered together, and such as they met
bare them company running towards the chasse. When they came to the slaine
body of Lepolemus, Charites threw her selfe upon him weeping and lamenting
grievously for his death, in such sort, that she would have presently ended
her life, upon the corps of her slaine husband, whom shee so entirely loved,
had it not beene that her parents and friends did comfort her, and pulled her
away. The body was taken up, and in the funerall pompe brought to the City and
buried. In the meane season Thrasillus fained much sorrow for the death of
Lepolemus, but in his heart he was well pleased and joyfull. And to
counterfeit the matter, he would come to Charites and say: O what a losse have
I had of my friend, my fellow, my companion Lepolemus? O Charites comfort your
selfe, pacifie your dolour, refraine your weeping, beat not your breasts: and
with such other and like words and divers examples he endeavoured to suppresse
her great sorrow, but he spake not this for any other intent but to win the
heart of the woman, and to nourish his odious love with filthy delight.
Howbeit Charites after the buriall of her husband sought the meanes to follow
him, and (not sustaining the sorrows wherein she was wrapped) got her secretly
into a chamber and purposed to finish her life there with dolour and
tribulation. But Thrasillus was very
importunate [*], and
at length brought to pass, that at the intercession of the Parents and friends
of Charites, she somewhat refreshed her fallen members with refection of meate
and baine. Howbeit, she did it more at the commandement of her Parents, then
for any thing else: for she could in no wise be merry, nor receive any
comfort, but tormented her selfe day and night before the Image of her husband
which she made like unto Bacchus, and rendred unto him divine honours and
services. In the meane season Thrasillus not able to refrain any longer,
before Charites had asswaged her dolor, before her troubled mind had pacified
her fury, even in the middle of all her griefes, while she tare her haire and
rent her garments, demanded her in marriage, and so without shame, he
detected [*]
the secrets and unspeakable deceipts of his heart. But
Charites detested and abhorred his demand, and as she had beene stroken with
some clap of thunder, with some storme, or with the lightning of Jupiter, she
presently fell downe to the ground all amazed. Howbeit when her spirits were
revived and that she returned to her selfe, perceiving that Thrasillus was so
importunate, she demanded respite to deliberate and to take advise on the
matter. In the meane season, the shape of Lepolemus that was slaine so
miserably, appeared to Charites saying, O my sweet wife (which no other person
can say but I) I pray thee for the love that is betweene us two, if there be
any memorie of me in thy heart, or remembrance of my pittifull death, marry
with any other person, so that thou marry not with the traitour Thrasillus,
have no conference with him, eate not with him, lie not with him, avoid the
bloudie hand of mine enemie, couple not thy selfe with a paricide, for those
wounds (the bloud whereof thy teares did wash away) were not the wounds of the
teeth of the Boare, but the speare of Thrasillus, that deprived me from thee.
Thus spake Lepolemus, unto his loving wife, and declared the residue of the
damnable fact. Then Charites, awaking from the sleepe, began to renew her
dolour, to teare her garments, and to beate her armes with her comely hands,
howbeit she revealed the vision which she saw to no manner of person, but
dissimuling that she knew no part of the mischiefe, devised with her selfe how
she might be revenged on the traitor, and finish her owne life to end and knit
up all sorrow. Incontinently came Thrasillus, the detestable demander of
sodain pleasure, and wearied the closed eares of Charites with talke of
marriage, but she gently refused his communication, and coloring the matter,
with passing craft in the middest of his earnest desires gan say, Thrasillus
you shall understand that yet the face of your brother and my husband, is
alwayes before mine eies, I smell yet the Cinamon sent of his pretious body, I
yet feele Lepolemus alive in my heart: wherefore you shall do well if you
grant to me miserable woman, necessarie time to bewaile his death, that after
the residue of a few moneths, the whole yeare may be expired, which thing
toucheth as well my shame as your wholsome profit, lest peradventure by your
speed and quicke marriage we should justly raise and provoke the spirit of my
husband to worke our destruction. Howbeit, Thrasillus was not contented with
this promise, but more and more came upon her: Insomuch, that she was enforced
to speake to him in this manner: My friend Thrasillus, if thou be so contented
untill the whole yeare be complete and finished, behold here is my bodie, take
thy pleasure, but in such sort and so secret that no servant of the house may
perceive it. Then Thrasillus trusting to the false promises of the woman. and
preferring his inordinate pleasure above all things in the world, was joyfull
in his heart and looked for night, when as he might have his purpose. But come
thou about midnight (quoth Charites) disguised without companie, and doe but
hisse at my chamber doore, and my nourse shall attend and let thee in. This
counsell pleased Thrasillus marveilously, who (suspecting no harme) did
alwaies look for night, and the houre assigned by Charites. The time was
scarce come, when as (according to her commandement) he disguised himselfe,
and went straight to the chamber, where he found the nourse attending for him,
who (by the appointment of her Mistresse) fed him with flattering talke, and
gave him mingled and doled drinke in a cup, excusing the absence of her
Mistresse Charites, by reason that she attended on her Father being sick,
untill such time, that with sweet talke and operation of the wine, he fell in
a sound sleepe: Now when he lay prostrate on the ground readie to all
adventure, Charites (being called for) came in, and with manly courage and
bold force stood over the sleeping murderer, saying: Behold the faithfull
companion of my husband, behold this valiant hunter; behold me deere spouse,
this is the hand which shed my bloud, this is the heart which hath devised so
many subtill meanes to worke my destruction, these be the eies whom I have ill
pleased, behold now they foreshew their owne destinie: sleepe carelesse,
dreame that thou art in the hands of the mercifull, for I will not hurt thee
with thy sword or any other weapon: God forbid that I should slay thee as thou
slewest my husband, but thy eies shall fail thee, and thou shalt see no more,
then that whereof thou dreamest: Thou shalt thinke the death of thine enemie
more sweet then thy life: Thou shalt see no light, thou shalt lacke the aide
of a leader, thou shalt not have me as thou hopest, thou shalt have no delight
of my marriage, thou shalt not die, and yet living thou shalt have no joy, but
wander betweene light and darknesse as an unsure Image: thou shalt seeke for
the hand that pricked out thine eies, yet thou shalt not know of whom thou
shouldest complaine: I will make sacrifice with the bloud of thine eies upon
the grave of my husband. But what gainest thou through my delay? Perhaps thou
dreamest that thou embracest me in thy armes: leave off the darknesse of
sleepe and awake thou to receive a penall deprivation of thy sight, lift up
thy face, regard thy vengeance and evill fortune, reckon thy miserie; so
pleaseth thine eies to a chast woman, and thou shalt have blindnesse to thy
companion, and an everlasting remorse of thy miserable conscience. When she
had spoken these words, she tooke a great needle from her head and pricked out
both his eies: which done, she by and by caught the naked sword which her
husband Lepolemus accustomed to weare, and ranne throughout all the Citie like
a mad woman towards the Sepulchre of her husband. Then all we of the house,
with all the Citizens, ranne incontinently after her to take the sword out of
her hand, but she clasping about the tombe of Lepolemus, kept us off with her
naked weapon, and when she perceived that every one of us wept and lamented,
she spake in this sort: I pray you my friends weepe not, nor lament for me,
for I have revenged the death of my husband, I have punished deservedly the
wicked breaker of our marriage; now it is time to seeke out my sweet
Lepolemus, and presently with this sword to finish my life. And therewithall
after she had made relation of the whole matter, declared the vision which she
saw and told by what meane she deceived Thrasillus, thrusting her sword under
her right brest, and wallowing in her owne bloud, at length with manly courage
yeelded up the Ghost. Then immediately the friends of miserable Charites did
bury her body within the same Sepulchre. Thrasillus hearing all the matter,
and knowing not by what meanes he might end his life, for he thought his sword
was not sufficient to revenge so great a crime, at length went to the same
Sepulchre, and cryed with a lowd voice, saying: O yee dead spirites whom I
have so highly and greatly offended, vouchsafe to receive me, behold I make
sacrifice unto you with my whole body: which said, hee closed the Sepulchre,
purposing to famish himselfe, and to finish his life there in sorrow. These
things the young man with pitifull sighes and teares, declared unto the
Cowheards and Shepheards, which caused them all to weepe: but they fearing to
become subject unto new masters, prepared themselves to depart away.
THE THIRTY-THIRD CHAPTER
How Apuleius was lead
away by the Horsekeeper: and what danger he was in.
By and by the Horsekeeper, to whom the
charge of me was committed, brought forth all his substance, and laded me and
other Horses withall, and so departed thence: we bare women, children,
pullets, sparrowes, kiddes, whelpes, and other things which were not able to
keepe pace with us, and that which I bare upon my back, although it was a
mighty burthen, yet seemed it very light, because I was driven away from him
that most terribly had appointed to kill me. When we had passed over a great
mountaine full of trees, and were come againe into the open fields, behold we
approached nigh to a faire and rich Castell, where it was told unto us that we
were not able to passe in our journey that night, by reason of the great
number of terrible Wolves which were in the Country about, so fierce and
cruell that they put every man in feare, in such sort that they would invade
and set upon such which passed by like theeves, and devoure both them and
their beasts. Moreover, we were advertised that there lay in the way where we
should passe, many dead bodies eaten and torne with wolves. Wherefore we were
willed to stay there all night, and on the next morning, to goe close and
round together, whereby we might passe and escape all dangers. But
(notwithstanding this good counsell) our caitife drivers were so covetous to
goe forward, and so fearefull of pursuite, that they never stayed till the
morning: But being welnigh midnight, they made us trudge in our way apace.
Then I fearing the great danger which might happen, ran amongst the middle of
the other Horses, to the end I might defend and save my poore buttocks from
the Wolves, whereat every man much marvelled to see, that I scowred away
swifter then the other Horses. But such was my agility, not to get me any
prayse, but rather for feare: at that time I remembered with my selfe, that
the valiant Horse Pegasus did fly in the ayre more to avoyd the danger of
dreadful Chimera, then for any thing else. The shepheards which drave us
before them were well armed like warriours: one had a speare, another had a
sheepehooke, some had darts, some clubbes, some gathered up great stones, some
held up their sharp Javelings, and some feared away the Woolves with light
firebrands. Finally wee lacked nothing to make up an Army, but onely Drummes
and Trumpets. But when we had passed these dangers, not without small feare,
wee fortuned to fall into worse, for the Woolves came not upon us, either
because of the great multitude of our company, or else because [of] our
firebrands, or peradventure they were gone to some other place, for wee could
see none, but the Inhabitants of the next villages (supposing that wee were
Theeves by reason of the great multitude) for the defence of their owne
substance, and for the feare that they were in, set great and mighty
masties [*]
upon us, which they had kept and nourished for the
safety of their houses, who compassing us round about leaped on every side,
tearing us with their teeth, in such sort that they pulled many of us to the
ground: verily it was a pittifull sight to see so many Dogs, some following
such as flyed, some invading such as stood still, some tearing those which lay
prostrate, but generally there were none which escaped cleare: Behold upon
this another danger ensued, the Inhabitants of the Towne stood in their
garrets and windowes, throwing great stones upon our heads, that wee could not
tell whether it were best for us to avoyd the gaping mouthes of the Dogges at
hand or the perill of the stones afarre, amongst whome there was one that
hurled a great flint upon a woman, which sate upon my backe, who cryed out
pitiously, desiring her husband to helpe her. Then he (comming to succour and
ayd his wife) beganne to speake in this sort: Alas masters, what mean you to
trouble us poore labouring men so cruelly? What meane you to revenge your
selves upon us, that doe you no harme? What thinke you to gaine by us? You
dwell not in Caves or Dennes: you are no people barbarous, that you should
delight in effusion of humane blood. At these words the tempest of stones did
cease, and the storme of the Dogges vanished away. Then one (standing on the
toppe of a great Cypresse tree) spake unto us saying: Thinke you not masters
that we doe this to the intent to rifle or take away any of your goods, but
for the safeguard of our selves and family: now a Gods name you may depart
away. So we went forward, some wounded with stones, some bitten with Dogs, but
generally there was none which escaped free.
THE THIRTY-FOURTH CHAPTER
How the shepheards
determined to abide in a certaine wood to cure their wounds.
When we had gone a good part of our
way, we came to a certaine wood invironed with great trees and compassed about
with pleasant meddowes, whereas the Shepheards appointed to continue a
certaine space to cure their wounds and sores; then they sate downe on the
ground to refresh their weary minds, and afterwards they sought for medicines,
to heale their bodies: some washed away their blood with the water of the
running River: some stopped their wounds with Spunges and cloutes, in this
manner every one provided for his owne safety. In the meane season wee
perceived an old man, who seemed to be a Shepheard, by reason of the Goates
and Sheep that fed round about him. Then one of our company demanded whether
he had any milke, butter, or cheese to sell. To whom he made answere saying:
Doe you looke for any meate or drinke, or any other refection here? Know you
not in what place you be?
And therewithall he tooke his sheepe and drave them away as fast as he
might possible. This answere made our shepheards greatly to feare, that they
thought of nothing else, but to enquire what Country they were in: Howbeit
they saw no manner of person of whom they might demand. At length as they were
thus in doubt, they perceived another old man with a staffe in his hand very
weary with travell, who approaching nigh to our company, began to weepe and
complaine saying: Alas masters I pray you succour me miserable caitife, and
restore my nephew to me againe, that by following a sparrow that flew before
him, is fallen into a ditch hereby, and verily I think he is in danger of
death. As for me, I am not able to helpe him out by reason of mine old age,
but you that are so valiant and lusty may easily helpe me herein, and deliver
me my boy, my heire and guide of my life. These words made us all to pity him.
And then the youngest and stoutest of our company, who alone escaped best the
late skirmish of the Dogges and stones, rose up and demanded in what ditch the
boy was fallen: Mary (quod he) yonder, and pointed with his finger, and
brought him to a great thicket of bushes and thornes where they both entred
in. In the meane season, after we cured our wounds, we tooke up our packs,
purposing to depart away. And because we would not goe away without the young
man our fellow: The shepheards whistled and called for him, but when he gave
no answer, they sent one out of their company to seeke him out, who after a
while returned againe with a pale face and sorrowfull newes, saying that he
saw a terrible Dragon eating and devouring their companion: and as for the old
man, hee could see him in no place. When they heard this, (remembring likewise
the words of the first old man that shaked his head, and drave away his sheep)
they ran away beating us before them, to fly from this desart and pestilent
Country.
THE THIRTY-FIFTH CHAPTER
How a woman killed her
selfe and her child, because her husband haunted harlots.
After that we had passed a great part
of our journey, we came to a village where we lay all night, but harken, and I
will tell you what mischiefe happened there: you shall understand there was a
servant to whom his Master had committed the whole government of his house,
and was Master of the lodging where we lay: this servant had married a Maiden
of the same house, howbeit he was greatly in love with a harlot of the towne,
and accustomed to resort unto her, wherewith his wife was so highly displeased
and became so jealous, that she gathered together all her husbands substance,
with his tales and books of account, and threw them into a light fire: she was
not contented with this, but she tooke a corde and bound her child which she
had by her husband, about her middle and cast her selfe headlong into a deepe
pit. The Master taking in evill part the death of these twaine, tooke his
servant which was the cause of this murther by his luxurie, and first after
that he had put off all his apparell, he annointed his body with honey, and
then bound him sure to a fig-tree, where in a rotten stocke a great number of
Pismares had builded their neasts, the Pismares after they had felt the
sweetnesse of the honey came upon his body, and by little and little (in
continuance of time) devoured all his flesh, in such sort, that there remained
on the tree but his bare bones: this was declared unto us by the inhabitants
of the village there, who greatly sorrowed for the death of this servant: then
we avoiding likewise from this dreadfull lodging, incontinently departed away.
THE THIRTY-SIXTH CHAPTER
How Apuleius was
cheapned by divers persons, and how they looked in his mouth to know his
age.
After this we came to a faire Citie
very populous, where our shepheards determined to continue, by reason that it
seemed a place where they might live unknowne, far from such as should pursue
them, and because it was a countrey very plentifull of corne and other
victuals, where when we had remained the space of three dayes, and that I
poore Asse and the other horses were fed and kept in the stable to the intent
we might seeme more saleable, we were brought out at length to the market, and
by and by a crier sounded with his horne to notifie that we were to be sold:
all my companion horses were bought up by a Gentleman, but as for me I stood
still forsaken of all men. And when many buiers came by and looked in my mouth
to know mine age, I was so weary with opening my jawes that at length (unable
to endure any longer) when one came with a stinking paire of hands and grated
my gummes with his filthy fingers, I bit them cleane off, which thing caused
the standers by to forsake me as being a fierce and cruell beast: the crier
when he had gotten a hoarse voice with crying, and saw that no man would buy
me, began to mocke me saying, To what end stand we here with this wilde Asse,
this feeble beast, this slow jade with worne hooves, good for nothing but to
make sives with his skin? Why do we not give him to some body for he earneth
not his hay? In this manner he made all the standers by to laugh exceedingly,
but my evill fortune which was ever so cruell against me, whom I by travell of
so many countreys could in no wise escape, did more and more envie me, with
invention of new meanes to afflict my poore body in giving me a new Master as
spitefull as the rest. There was an old man somewhat bald, with long and gray
haire, one of the number of those that go from door to door, throughout all
the villages, bearing the Image of the goddesse Syria, and playing with
Cimbals to get the almes of good and charitable folks, this old man came
hastely towards the cryer, and demanded where I was bred: Marry (quoth he) in
Cappadocia: Then he enquired what age I was of, the cryer answered as a
Mathematician, which disposed to me my Planets, that I was five yeares old,
and willed the old man to looke in my mouth: For I would not willingly (quoth
he) incur the penalty of the law Cornelia, in selling a free Citizen for a
servile slave, buy a Gods name this faire beast to ride home on, and about in
the countrey: But this curious buier did never
stint [*]
to question of my qualities, and at length he demanded whether I were gentle
or no: Gentle (quoth the crier) as gentle as a Lambe, tractable to all use, he
will never bite, he will never kicke, but you would rather thinke that under
the shape of an Asse there were some well advised man, which verely you may
easily conject, for if you would thrust your nose in his taile you shall
perceive how patient he is: Thus the cryer mocked the old man, but he
perceiving his taunts and jests, waxed very angry saying, Away doting cryer, I
pray the omnipotent and omniparent goddesse Syria, Saint Sabod, Bellona, with
her mother Idea, and Venus, with Adonis, to strike out both thine eies, that
with taunting mocks hast scoffed me in this sort: Dost thou thinke that I will
put a goddesse upon the backe of any fierce beast. whereby her divine Image
should be throwne downe on the ground, and so I poore miser should be
compelled (tearing my haire) to looke for some Physition to helpe her? When I
heard him speake thus, I thought with my selfe sodainly to leap upon him like
mad Asse, to the intent he should not buy me, but incontinently there came
another Marchant that prevented my thought, and offered 17 Pence for me, then
my Master was glad and received the money, and delivered me to my new Master
who was called Phelibus, and he carried his new servant home, and before he
came to his house, he called out his daughters saying, Behold my daughters,
what a gentle servant I have brought for you: then they were marvailous glad,
and comming out pratling and shouting for joy, thought verely that he had
brought home a fit and conveniable servant for their purpose, but when they
perceived that it was an Asse, they began to provoke him, saying that he had
not bought a servant for his Maidens, but rather an Asse for himselfe. Howbeit
(quoth they) keepe him not wholly for your owne riding, but let us likewise
have him at our commandement. Therewithall they led me into the stable, and
tied me to the manger: there was a certaine yong man with a mighty body, wel
skilled in playing on instruments before the gods to get money, who (as soone
as he had espied me) entertained me verie well, for he filled my racke and
maunger full of meat, and spake merrily, saying, O master Asse, you are very
welcome, now you shall take my office in hand, you are come to supply my
roome, and to ease me of my miserable labour: but I pray God thou maist long
live and please my Master well, to the end thou maist continually deliver me
from so great paine. When I heard these words I did prognosticate my miserie
to come.
The day following I saw there a great number of persons apparelled in
divers colours, having painted faces, mitres on their heads, vestiments
coloured like saffron, Surplesses of silke, and on their feet yellow shooes,
who attired the goddesse in a robe of Purple, and put her upon my backe. Then
they went forth with their armes naked to their shoulders, bearing with them
great swords and mightie axes, and dancing like mad persons. After that we had
passed many small villages, we fortuned to come to one Britunis house, where
at our first entrie they began to hurle themselves hither and thither, as
though they were mad. They made a thousand gestures with their feete and their
hands, they would bite themselves, finally, every one tooke his weapon and
wounded his armes in divers places.
Amongst whom there was one more mad then the rest, that
fet [*]
many deepe sighes from the bottome of his heart, as though
he hae [sic] beene ravished in spirite, or replenished with divine power. And
after that, he somewhat returning to himselfe, invented and forged a great
lye, saying, that he had displeased the divine majesty of the goddesse, by
doing of some thing which was not convenable to the order of their holy
religion, wherefore he would doe vengeance of himselfe: and therewithall he
tooke a whip, and scourged his owne body, that the bloud issued out
abundantly, which thing caused me greatly to feare, to see such wounds and
effusion of bloud, least the same goddesse desiring so much the bloud of men,
should like wise desire the bloud of an Asse. After they were weary with
hurling and beating themselves, they sate downe, and behold, the inhabitants
came in, and offered gold, silver, vessels of wine, milke, cheese, flower,
wheate and other things: amongst whom there was one, that brought barly to the
Asse that carried the goddesse, but the greedie whoresons thrust all into
their sacke, which they brought for the purpose and put it upon my backe, to
the end I might serve for two purposes, that is to say, for the barne by
reason of my corne, and for the Temple by reason of the goddesse. In this
sort, they went from place to place, robbing all the Countrey over. At length
they came to a certaine Castle where under colour of divination, they brought
to passe that they obtained a fat sheepe of a poore husbandman for the
goddesse supper and to make sacrifice withall. After that the banket was
prepared, they washed their bodies, and brought in a tall young man of the
village, to sup with them, who had scarce tasted a few pottage, when hee began
to discover their beastly customes and inordinate desire of luxury. For the
compassed him round about, sitting at the table, and abused the young man,
contrary to all nature and reason. When I beheld this horrible fact, I could
not but attempt to utter my mind and say, O masters, but I could pronounce no
more but the first letter O, which I roared out so valiantly, that the young
men of the towne seeing for a straie Asse, that they had lost the same night,
and hearing my voice, whereby they judged that I had beene theirs, entred into
the house unawares, and found these persons committing their vilde
abhomination, which when they saw, they declared to all the inhabitants by,
their unnatural villany, mocking and laughing at this the pure and cleane
chastity of their religion. In the meane season, Phelibus and his company, (by
reason of the bruit which was dispersed throughout all the region there of
their beastly wickednesse) put all their trumpery upon my backe, and departed
away about midnight. When we had passed a great part of our journey, before
the rising of the Sun, we came into a wild desart, where they conspired
together to slay me. For after they had taken the goddesse from my backe and
set her gingerly upon the ground, they likewise tooke off my harnesse, and
bound me surely to an Oake, beating me with their whip, in such sort that all
my body was mortified. Amongst whom there was one that threatened to cut off
my legs with his hatchet, because by my noyse I diffamed his chastity, but the
other regarding more their owne profit than my utility, thought best to spare
my life, because I might carry home the goddesse. So they laded me againe,
driving me before them with their naked swords, till they came to a noble
City: where the principall Patrone bearing high reverence unto the goddesse,
came in great devotion before us with Tympany, Cymbals, and other instruments,
and received her, and all our company with much sacrifice and veneration. But
there I remember, I thought my selfe in most danger, for there was one that
brought to the Master of the house, a side of a fat Bucke for a present, which
being hanged behind the kitchin doore, nor far from the ground, was cleane
eaten up by a gray hound, that came in. The Cooke when he saw the Venison
devoured, lamented and wept pitifully. And because supper time approached
nigh, when as he should be reproved of too much negligence, he tooke a halter
to hang himselfe: but his wife perceiving whereabout he went, ran
incontinently to him, and taking the halter in both her hands, stopped him of
his purpose, saying, O husband, are you out of your wits? pray husband follow
my counsel, cary this strange Asse out into some secret place and kill him,
which done, cut off one of his sides, and sawce it well like the side of the
Bucke, and set it before your Master. Then the Cooke hearing the counsell of
his wife, was well pleased to slay me to save himselfe: and so he went to the
whetstone, to sharpe his tooles accordingly.