Before & After
     Alive

Michelle - The Present



Michelle lay face down across the bed propped up on her elbows. Her feet danced behind her in the air. Here, in Danny's bed, the tangled sheets twisted around their bodies Michelle was unaware of anything, but how she had felt for the past few hours. Content to recapture the wonder of her past she refused to wander into the forbidden territory of reality. Her greatest fantasy had come true.

Danny, a bowl of cherries balanced on his chest, sat against the headboard his right hand slowly drifted up and down her arm. Taking a plump cherry by the stem he held it between his thumb and index finger out to her. She extended her tongue and licked. Just as it was within the grasp of her teeth he pulled it away.

"Hey!," she protested.

"I want to see you do that again..." Danny said with a devilish smile as he once again dangled the lush fruit.

She bit down and savored the tasty orb. He leaned forward and pressed his mouth to her chin. She rolled over to her back and stared up into Danny's smiling eyes. Her hair formed a halo of golden rays around her flushed face. With her hands she brought his face closer to her. The fruit tumbled over the pristine white sheets. His lips caressed her mouth.

She sighed as Danny rained kisses along her neck and chest.

"I feel like I'm eighteen again..." she whispered in his ear.

"Eighteen was a good year..." he said mischievously.

"A very good year...I met this guy..." She paused as his mouth claimed hers again.

"A guy?" he questioned into her open mouth. With his fingertips he began to slowly make circles on her chest.

"He rescued me..."

Danny stopped what he was doing and gazed into Michelle's eyes. "Rescued?"

"Many times...."





Michelle - The Past



She climbed over the balcony and opened the glass door to her bedroom. A permanent smile pasted to her face. Danny had prepared a picnic for them on their private beach. They had spent the night eating, laughing, talking and making love. Making love... The thought sent a shiver up her spine. To top it off Rick and Abby were leaving for a medical conference and Aunt Meta was in Washington, DC. She would have the house to herself for four whole days. Michelle was walking on air. At her bedside she flicked on the lamp.

"Do you know what time it is?" A stern voice asked.

Michelle, startled, knocked the lamp to the floor. She turned her gaze to her brother. She groaned inwardly when she saw the look on Rick's face.

"I know what time it is." She said as she crossed the room to her dressing table and began to remove her gold watch.

"Where have you been?" Rick asked the anger more evident now that she was being so nonchalant.

"Out."

"Have you been drinking?" His voice boomed through the room.

"Stop yelling! AND NO...I wasn't drinking."

"It's after five o'clock in the morning! YOU are my responsibility and I want some answers." He was standing in front of her.

"Oh Rick! Give it a rest. I was out...out with Melissa!" Pushing past him she went to her closet.

"That's funny. The phone rang at about 10:30 last night and it was Melissa." He waited for Michelle to say something.

Michelle stood perfectly still. She felt like smacking herself. Why did you give him a name?

"You don't have anything to say?" Rick asked. Michelle turned to face her brother.

"NO Rick I don't! You apparently know everything!"

"Michelle I am trying really hard here. What's going on?"

"Nothing is going on Rick! It's the summer. I'm trying to have FUN!" She yelled as she lay down on her bed and exhaled loudly.

"Nooooo...You see I'm not stupid. Something is up and I'm not leaving until you tell me what it is."

"Get off my back!"

Rick was standing by her desk looking at something. She tried getting up quickly to stop him. "Hey! HEY!" The papers...I have to stop him...

"What is this?" He held up a stack of papers. "What the hell? You haven't sent the response to Stanford? I don't believe this?"

"Those are mine!" She attempted to snatch the papers from his hand. "Give me..."

The door to her room opened and Abby came in. "Why are two yelling? Do you know what time it is?"

Michelle glared at Rick.

"It seems that Michelle has been lying to us Abby. She hasn't sent the papers to Stanford. Do you remember her telling us, ohhhh...I'd say about two weeks ago, that she'd mailed her response? Because I do!"

"Michelle?" Abby asked.

Michelle was speechless. She fought back tears of anger.

"Honey, why did you lie?"

"I didn't lie." Michelle said forcefully.

"NO?" Rick yelled.

"I'm not going." She wiped her eyes and stood her ground. Rick and Abby stared at her flabbergasted.

"What? WHAT?" Rick looked like he was going to explode.

"You heard me."

"Michelle I don't know what has gotten into you, but you are going to Stanford!"

"I want to stay here." She had stopped yelling and now simply wanted some quiet.

"Well, I'm sorry, but that's impossible!" Rick's voice boomed throughout her room.

"No. It's not. I don't want to go to California..."

"Michelle." Abby came to her and placed her hands on her shoulders. "Why haven't you said something sooner."

"I...I don't know. Maybe because I knew how he'd react." She spit out, pointing her finger at her brother.

"How I'd react? Unbelievable... You have the chance to go to Stanford. Something that you wanted!"

"I changed my mind." Stop!

"Oh no you don't! What made you change your mind? Or should I be asking who?" Rick had raised his voice again.

"Stop yelling at me! If you want to go to Stanford so much... You go!"

"Bill. It has to be..." Rick's anger was almost beyond control. He grabbed Michelle by the arm.

"Bill?," Michelle asked incredulous.

Abby stepped between them forcing Rick to let her go.

"Rick, please! Calm down!" Abby was quickly losing her temper. Turning to Michelle she said, "Now Michelle..."

"Abby..." Michelle pleaded with her eyes. Begging her sister-in-law to end the interrogation.

Abby's eyes were filled with compassion.

"I...uh...Rick..." Abby was holding on to Rick's arm.

"No Abby! I want answers. NOW! How are we supposed to go away tomorrow? What am I saying? It's today! We leave for the conference in a few hours Abby! Aunt Meta is visiting her friend Edna in Washington. We can't go! I'm not leaving her here knowing that she's sneaking around with Bill at all hours of the night and..."

"I'm no----" Michelle caught herself before revealing her secret. He thinks you were with Bill!

"Rick..." Abby tried to interrupt her husband. Rick jutted out his index finger and yelled at Michelle.

"How does it feel to know you screwed everything up for everyone?"

"F...Shut up Rick!" Michelle yelled.

"So now you have a filthy mouth too!"

Michelle guffawed. There was something ridiculous about her brother being so indignant over her cursing.

She sobered up considerably when she heard Abby say, "I'll call Vanessa. I'm sure she'll talk to Bill..."

"You can't call Vanessa!" Michelle said quickly.

"Michelle!" Abby warned.

"Abby please..." Michelle's impassioned plea was not overlooked by her sister-in-law. She peered at Michelle oddly and then her face took on the appearance of what Michelle hoped was understanding. There is a God!

"Rick...," Abby began, "I think we should take a step back. Let's be reasonable here."

"Abby!"

Michelle stared down her brother. "I'm not going to Stanford!" And please don't call Vanessa...

She passed between her brother and sister-in-law and ran into the bathroom. She could feel their eyes on her as she shut the door and locked it. Shaking she turned on the water to the shower.

"MICHELLE! MICHELLE!" Rick was banging on the door. She ignored him and sank to the floor.

"Rick..leave her alone. Let's talk about this. Please." She heard Abby convincing Rick.

"Abby do I have to remind you we are leaving for New York in a few hours? I can't leave her here knowing she's sneaking out and lying to us."

"Rick please...let's think about this."

Gulping back tears of frustration Michelle tried catching her breath. This is happening too soon...I thought I'd have more time... Noticing her gym bag she reached for it and began tossing the contents on the floor. She grasped her cell phone and brought it to her chest. With her thumb she dialed the numbers she had memorized. The phone rang twice.

"Danny..."




Danny - The Past


Danny's cell phone rang just as he was waiting for the light to turn green so he could access the highway. He glanced at the clock on his dashboard. He picked it up and checked the display to see who was calling. He smiled.

"Hey you..."

"Danny..."

He was immediately concerned when he heard her voice. "Michelle? What's wrong?" The light turned green, but he didn't go.

"I...I...They know." She was crying and it broke his heart. Know?

"Know what?" His heart sank. He had hoped they would have more time together before anyone found out about them. Somehow he had thought they could work it all out.

"I told them...about..." She was sobbing loudly. He did an illegal u-turn and headed for her house.

"I'm on my way."

"Nooo...you can't come here." She said anxiously.

"Michelle..."

"It's going to get worse. You can't."

"I don't know what to do..." He was panicking. Michelle was crying.

"Talk to me..." She said softly.

He drove on towards her house defying her request. He flew through a red light.

"What do you want me to talk about?" He sighed.

"Tell me about the first time you saw me..."

"You know that story." He protested.

"Tell me again...please."

He ignored another red light.

"You were beautiful...I saw you...I wanted to know who you were right then and there. Your hair was a curly mess...sexy...ummm..." He couldn't continue.

"I said, 'Do you normally stand in the shadows spying on people?' and then you said..." She coaxed.

"I said, 'No. Only when I find the subject interesting.' You were so cocky..."

"You were gorgeous."

"I know."

She laughed through her tears. He felt like it was taking him forever to get to her house.

They were quiet for some time. It was a comfortable silence.

"Tell me more..." She whispered.

"I...ummm...It was so dark and I couldn't see your face. And I remember hoping that you were smiling. When you moved out of my shadow you were...it was amazing..." He was picturing her in his mind as he parked his car in front of her house. That night had changed everything...

"Really?"

"Really." he assured her.

"I love you Danny."

"Love you too babe."

He made a left turn onto her street. He looked out his window up at her bedroom. The light in her room wasn't the only one on.

"Damn!"

"Where are you?" She sniffled.

"Where do you want me to be?"

"Here..."

He sighed...




Michelle - The Past


"Here...I want you here. But it's late."

"It's never too late."

"Danny, why is my life so complicated?" She asked desperately between sniffles.

"I have some ideas.," he said.

"It's all so easy is when I'm with you."

"You think so?" he asked sincerely.

"Definitely."

"When I'm with you I'm alive." He sighed audibly into the phone.

"Michelle...unlock the door."

"What? What door?" She was puzzled.

"The bathroom. Unlock the door to the bathroom." He insisted.

She stared up at the door knob and reached with her hand. She loosened the lock. Her heart was pounding. "It's open...," she whispered into the phone her breath caught in her throat.

It seemed as if the door opened in slow motion. Clutching the phone to her ear she watched. Her eyes closed as he walked into the small room.

"Breathe..." He whispered. Her eyes opened with slight trepidation and tears threatened to spill.

"Alive..."

He wrapped her in his embrace. She sobbed uncontrollably against his chest as he slowly drew circles on her back. "It'll be okay...I promise...it'll be fine...," he repeated over and over again.

Danny - The Present



"I'd hardly qualify anything I've ever done for or with you as rescuing.," Danny said.

He pulled Michelle up into his embrace, settling her into his arms. The night lights of the city illuminated the room. Her body fit comfortable against his. Her back against his chest. Holding his right hand she played with his fingers.

"Well, you were there when I needed you."

"I complicated your life." He brought her arm up and kissed the length of her creamy white skin.

"I loved the complications."

He kissed her cheek, "You did not."

"I did..." They laughed together and then a quiet settled around them.

She twisted in his lap until she was facing him. "I dream about you." she whispered against his lips. "We're always together in my dreams...like this..."

Kissing her forehead, "I have to show you something."

He got out of the bed and walked to the desk. He picked up a leather bound journal. Returning to the bedside he sat down in front of her and handed her the book. He turned on the light and watched her as her hands moved over the well worn diary. She stared up at him questioning.

"Open it."

She turned to the first page and scanned the words. Her hand covered her mouth, stifling a sob. Her eyes gleaming she looked at him. As she read her voice wavered and tears began to fall from her eyes...

M,

You've been gone for exactly two hours three minutes and forty five seconds. Do you realize that's a lifetime? I miss you baby...

D.