K'ei and Juxankyth

K’ei stood still under the man’s gaze. An outside observer would think he was steeling himself for the scrutiny of an enemy solider, not his Wingleader, but it really wouldn’t have made a difference to K’ei. He was an amazingly open-minded person and treated everyone the same way. The fact that his ‘way’ was rather rude and definitely unfriendly never crossed the Wingsecond’s mind.

T’nir, who despite K’ei attitude towards him was a very friendly man, smiled and nodded. "Sure. There’s not going to be any Thread for at least a seven-day. If you want leave to go visit your old Hold, you have my permission." The Wingfirst’s gaze lingered on the seven foot tall man, perhaps hoping for some reaction to his words, some hint of why the normally anti-social man was taking his first vacation in turns.

K’ei nodded to show he understood and returned to his weyr to begin packing for the journey. T’nir gave him a whole seven-day and he was planning on using it. The Wingfirst shook his head as the man left, wondering how he could constantly keep his feelings under raps. If he’d wanted a hint into the inner workings of K’ei’s mind, he was looking at the wrong person.

Dian was ecstatic. He twirled in the air, chirping loudly, notifying all the other flits that he was going on a trip. The other flits didn’t seem to care much, until Dian started knocking them off their perches. Within seconds the brown flit had caused a fight that he was no longer a part of. K’ei decided to keep walking as quickly as possible, praying everyone thought that the brown and blue Dian left behind had just had a minor disagreement over something entirely unrelated to having their tails bit.

Eyes whirling a deep blue, Juxankyth swooped in and landed gracefully on his dragonledge. I take it we have permission to go?

K’ei snatched the flit out of the air and tossed it at his bed. The flit spread it’s wings before it hit, and chirped more happily than ever. It didn’t care that it had been abused, it was too happy. "I find it annoying that you insist on reading my emotions through that flitter." K’ei’s expression didn’t change, and he hadn’t technically insulted anyone, but if Dian had been fully aware of the language, he would have taken offense.

Juxankyth’s tail flicked back and forth playfully. As sure as Dian betrayed K’ei’s emotions, the large blue’s tail betrayed his. You know that outburst might be considered emotional.

K’ei gave his lifemate his own personal subdued form of glare and began throwing clothes into a bag. He was planning on leaving as soon as possible, before anyone could find him and ask him to do something. Moments after his transfer to Adanuk, Media had discovered that he was a big strong man who couldn’t refuse the Headwoman anything. Suddenly, K’ei wasn’t only a dragonrider, he was also Media’s muscle and the receiving end of every pun on pack horses that Juxankyth could think of. "I was suggesting that the flit calm down before his peers come and tear him wing from wing."

Right... Unfortunately the telepathic bond often meant that neither the rider nor the large blue could actually veil their feelings from each other. Dian, please be quiet before K’ei tears you wing from wing.

K’ei was not amused by the comment, and showed his distaste by strapping Juxankyth’s saddle on just a little bit tighter than the blue was used to. The dragon tried to hide his amusement, and K’ei fixed the saddle. He was strapping his bag to the saddle when the closest expression K’ei had to fear washed over his face. "C’mon, let’s go."

Juxankyth, slightly confused, obediently walked out onto the dragonledge and spread his wings, waiting for his rider to mount. K’ei swung himself up quickly, and ordered his bond into the air just as the feared voice echoed from his now empty weyr.

"Oh, hello Dian. Is your master home? T’nir said he was leaving and I just wanted him too..." Media’s voice was thankfully cut short when Juxankyth betweened.

Unfortunately, the blue’s voice remained. You were running away from Media? The language did not contain the word for how shocked and amused the blue was. I’ve seen you face down thieves, murderers, hired goons and that damned wher that got loose and now you’re retreating from an aged Headwoman?!?

K’ei’s face was relatively expressionless, aside from a slight twitch when his bond mentioned retreating. "I wasn’t retreating."

The dragon gave a deep rumbling laugh as they flew over the Hold that K’ei had once called home. You just now that you can’t say no to her and you didn’t want to be stuck doing heavy work all afternoon, so you ran away.

"I never run away." K’ei let go of the reins to grab Dion as he reappeared. "I was moving to a more strategic location."

The dragon bugled his arrival, but it sounded more like a laugh in K’ei’s ears. I think all this human contact is having a bad influence on you rider-mine. That was almost a joke.

* * *

"Kouei?" The Lord Holder was more than a little surprised to see his old employee again, let alone on dragonback.

"Master Salec." K’ei bobbed his head respectfully. "I apologize for not giving advance warning of my arrival. I just came to visit someone."

Dian was, miracle of miracles, subdued for the moment and giving the Lord Holder no help. The man was obviously confused. He’d hired Kouei in the first place because he was built like a tank, and secondly because he was the most anti-social person he could find. Salec was not a man to pass up any opportunity to make money, and if the opportunity was slightly less than legal, he had men, like Kouei, to clean it up for him. When his personal favourite had disappeared, leaving only a vague message with his friend, one of Salec’s many concubines, that he had been searched and was forced to terminate his contract. Salec had suspected that the big man had got a better offer from another Lord Holder and had just switched allegiances. This actually came as a surprise. "Visit? Who? No offense rider, but you didn’t make many friends here." The tone in his voice clearly showed that K’ei shouldn’t think of the Lord Holder as a friend either.

K’ei noted the intonation and would have liked to tell the Lord Holder exactly what he could do, but the Weyrwoman had a tendency to frown on her Wingriders beating up her Hold leaders. "I won’t be staying long. I just wanted to check up on a friend." That wasn’t the original plan, but the more K’ei thought about seeing his friend again, the more he thought about how presumptuous of him. He missed Mirala because she was the only one patient enough to put up with him on a daily basis, and he was coming here and invading her life just because he was too walled up in himself to make friends with any of the people at Adanuk. He wasn’t going to disturb her, or even spend the night here. He just wanted her to know what happened to him. He wanted to make sure that he had managed to not ostracize just one person.

Had he been paying more attention to Dian, like everyone else did when they were around him, he would have been nervous about something else. The brown flit was pointedly quiet and still. He could have been a well carved statue, if he wasn’t breathing. Unfortunately, all K’ei could think was how wonderful it was that Dian wasn’t embarrassing him.

Juxankyth noted the fact that K’ei was anxious to meet his old friend, noted how his rider was probably showing more emotion in that moment than he had in any other moment of his life, noted Dian’s behaviour, and was worried. The blue shook his head. Now you decide to participate in the full range of human emotions.

K’ei was slightly shocked when Juxankyth spoke, the dragon knew that K’ei couldn’t keep up a mental conversation and a verbal one at the same time. He didn’t notice the sadness in the dragon’s telepathic voice. I’m merely taking your advice.

Salec finally decided that K’ei was probably telling the truth, for no other reason then the Lord Holder couldn’t think of any other reason K’ei would be here. "Stay as long as you want, if you need quarters for the night I’m sure I can arrange something." Salec turned and began walking away as K’ei answered.

K’ei almost smiled. "No thank you sir. I’ll be quick. If I know Mirala she probably has a million other things she should be doing."

The Lord Holder stopped and slowly turned around. "Mirala?"

"Yes sir. Could you tell me where I can find her?" Instantaneously, K’ei realized that something was wrong. Dian was sulking, Juxankyth was quiet and the Lord Holder was surprised. K’ei was sure he didn’t want to know.

"Your visit might be quicker than you think dragonrider." The Lord Holder almost looked regretful. "Mirala died almost four turns ago during childbirth." He shook his head.

For an instant K’ei was sure he was going to die as well. Everything inside him burst into excruciating pain and he had to put his hand on the wall to steady himself. He was having trouble breathing, then in a moment it all went away. K’ei stood up straight, all expression leaving his face. "I didn’t know. Forgive me for bringing up painful memories. I’ll be going then."

The Lord Holder nodded, almost relieved to see K’ei back to his normal stoic self. "Good to see you again Kouei. Take care of yourself." He shook K’ei’s hand and headed back to his rooms. Salec had many concubines, but Mirala had always been his favourite.

K’ei picked up his brown flit and carried him back to where Juxankyth was waiting. He mounted and ordered Juxankyth back to Adanuk.

Rider-mine? The dragon had never had to deal with K’ei having an emotional crisis before. He was totally unaware of what he should do or say. On the other hand, his rider didn’t really appear to be in much emotional distress. The blue could feel K’ei’s grief, but it was very suppressed.

"Just go." Dian lay limp in K’ei’s lap.

The dragon, feeling that he had somehow failed his rider, leapt into the air.

* * *

You skipped dinner again today. Juxankyth knew that bringing this subject up again would only cause an argument, but he couldn’t stand by and watch his rider starve himself to death either.

"I’m not hungry. You don’t need me to feed you any more." K’ei picked up a book and sat down, losing himself in the pages.

Dian sat quietly on the desk, not even bothering to poke his nose around K’ei personal things. The people at Adanuk didn’t notice a change in K’ei, he was always quiet and anit-social, they did notice a change in the brown flit. Some thought that K’ei had finally got annoyed enough that he’d hurt the little creature, but Celeste, of all people, was his primary defender. She told everyone to leave K’ei and his flitter alone, they couldn’t understand.

If K’ei had been himself, he would have been secretly grateful. As it was he was just annoyed that some healer he barely knew thought she knew him.

Juxankyth flopped down on his dragoncouch, calling Dian to him. Over the days since their short trip to the Hold, Juxankyth has searched for sympathetic, inspiring, helpful words and come up with absolutely nothing. The fact that any other dragon would probably know exactly what to do for their rider made Juxankyth grumpy and moody. He cursed the day he’d ever suggested taking the trip to see Mirala. K’ei had just been so lonely, and everytime he thought about Mirala he didn’t seem quite so lonely. The blue was only trying to help. I’m not really hungry either.

K’ei didn’t acknowledge his dragon’s response. He seemed to be too involved in his reading. If the book had been anything even remotely interesting, Juxankyth might have believed K’ei’s act. As the book was one on the mining and collection of firestone, a topic about as hot as snowfall, Juxankyth knew K’ei’d heard.

The blue decided to try to talk again. I know you’re upset about Mirala’s death rider-mine, but that’s no reason to die yourself! There is nothing wrong with feeling grief, or sadness. It just means you’re human! She was your friend and...

The look on K’ei’s face halted the dragon. He put the book down and stared blankly at Dian. "She wasn’t my friend."

The dragon snorted. Yeah right. You enjoyed talking to her, she appeared to enjoy your company, you missed her, you’re sad she’s gone. Sounds like you two hated each other.

"I hadn’t talked to her in five turns. She probably didn’t even remember me." K’ei was trying very hard to keep his voice level. "Do you have any idea how many guards there were? How many other men she must have known? She had her own life. She lived her own life. She had better things to do than remember me, or worry about me. It was selfish of me to think that she would."

Rider-mine... Juxankyth couldn’t think of anything to say. He didn’t have to. K’ei was more than willing to continue.

"If we were actually friends I would have gone to see her earlier, she would have tried to send a message to me. If we ever had actually been friends, she would have thought I didn’t care about her. She would have died thinking that I didn’t remember her. I never told her that she was important to me. She never knew that I..." K’ei trailed off, slightly surprised at the revelation he’d talked himself into. "...cared..."

Juxankyth nudged his rider with his head, letting the big man knew the dragon understood. Maybe that was your problem rider-mine. Not that people die, that people die without knowing you remember them.

Dian, feeling left out, chirped loudly and landed on K’ei shoulder chittering away at the dragon and completely destroying the sentimental moment. Juxankyth snapped playfully at the flitter, causing it to quickly leap to the other shoulder, demanding K’ei’s protection.

K’ei’s expression didn’t change, but something in his eyes told Juxankyth he didn’t have anything to worry about anymore. "Let’s go eat."

* * *

"What?" T’nir looked at his Wingsecond like he’d grown another head.

"Thank you for excusing me from the drills yesterday. I appreciate it." The man had better hear it this time because K’ei was not bloody well planning on repeating himself again.

T’nir wasn’t sure if he was more surprised because of the thanks, or the fact that K’ei could deliver them with such a blank face. "You’re welcome..."

K’ei nodded and quickly turned away. This telling people what he thought of them was harder than he’d originally thought.

The blue dragon found all of this very amusing. You might try some facial expression next time.

"When I want your opinion Juxankyth....I’ll never want your opinion." K’ei stepped out of the hot Weyrbowl into the cool kitchens and was a little surprised to notice that he was famished. Most of the tables were filled, but there was still one near the back that he could have all to himself. Dian nipped his ear. K’ei stopped and looked around the dining hall, reminding himself that he was trying to be friendly. He approached a nearly empty table where Feena, Almara, and M’thew appeared to be having a familiar conversation. He took a moment to calm himself before approaching them. "May I sit here?"

Dian, not waiting for their response, jumped onto the table and began bugging Kaye and Kar. The two greens, followed closely by the brown, retreated into the rafters.

K’ei made a mental note to lock the brown up later as he waited patiently for the group’s response.

Feena, who had never once acted tactfully in any way, stared blankly at him. "What?"

M’thew, her weyrmate kicked her under the table. "Sure. Sit down."

K’ei moved to take a chair beside M’thew, but Almara took her feet off the chair beside her and he took the hint. "Thank you."

Almara smirked. "We were just talking about Candy’s Akarath. There’s a rumour going around that she’s going to fly."

K’ei, not used to gossip in any way shape or form, didn’t understand why they’d talk about that. "Why not just check the flight listings. If Akarath was planning on flying I’m sure Candy would have notified the Weyrwoman."

The three looked at each other, and then looked at K’ei. Feena smirked. "You’d think so wouldn’t you?"

Almara glared at Feena. "Ever played Go?"

"Yes." K’ei learned the game along time ago, and wasn’t sure if he could still remember all the rules.

"Perfect." Almara grinned. "Let’s see if we’ve finally found someone who can beat M’thew."

K’ei was slightly unnerved by the two girl’s grins, but it turned out he remembered more than he’d originally thought. He went down as the first person to ever beat M’thew, three games out of five.

* * *

"K’ei!" Media saw his large frame disappearing behind a corner and sped up. "Wingsecond?"

Realizing he was caught, the bluerider stopped and turned to face the Headwoman. "Yes?"

"Whoa." Media put her hand over her heart. "I’m too old to be chasing people around this maze!"

"Yes Headwoman. I believe that’s what your assistants are for." K’ei hoped Media’s task wouldn’t take him too long. If he was late for his game with M’thew, the bluerider would likely claim to have won by default.

Media laughed, giving Dian a quick pat on the head. "I know you’re in a hurry, you’re a good man to help me out so much. I won’t keep you long. I just have a message."

K’ei, the master of hiding one’s emotions, let Media know that she was never a bother and that he wasn’t in a hurry. "My friends will wait for me."

Media smiled. "I’m glad to hear that." She reached into her pocket and pulled out a very worn sheet of paper. "Hear. It came from a Lord Holder Salec, or something like that."

K’ei was surprised. "Thank you Headwoman."

Media smiled, patted Dian and hurried off, leaving K’ei alone with his note.

Open it already, the suspense is killing me. Juxankyth informed Serenth that they might be a little late. The smaller blue told him that they’d only wait ten more minutes before K’ei forfeited.

K’ei opened the note and read the scribbled message out loud. "Kouei. Your inquiry about Mirala surprised me and that’s the only explanation I can offer for my bluntness. It really got me thinking, and I guess it’s a little presumptuous of me to write you, but I felt you should now this. I really liked Mirala, and I think she would want you to know this. She may have died during childbirth, but the beautiful little girl didn’t. She looks a lot like her mother, and has her mother’s smile. Mirala did see the girl before she died, and did get a chance to name her. She called the beautiful baby Koueya. I thought you deserved to know. Salec."

K’ei stood for a moment, staring at the message he’d read. He folded the note carefully and stuck it in his pocket. "Juxankyth."

Yes rider-mine?

K’ei smiled. "She knew."

* * *

Read K’ei’s weyrling story.
Read K’ei’s hatchling story.
Read K'ei's candidate story.
K'ei impresed Juxankyth at Moon Shadow Weyr.
Dian's picture is from Caer Mystrach.
Background is from Myrror Images.