Title: Leap of Faith
Author: BJ
Disclaimer: Anyone and everything you recognize belongs to Marvel.
I’m not making any money, please don’t sue.
Rating: Strong R
Archive: If you have the other Angel Song stories, sure.
Summary: My version of how Angel Song came to be. Set about three weeks
after Remy’s return from the cold.
Warnings: Talk of rape and child abuse - nothing you probably haven’t
read before. Logan does a little day dreaming and gets a bit carried away.J
No Beta, please excuse the many mistakes you’ll probably find.
Logan cursed and opened his eyes. Even behind the mansion, in his favorite
spot in the woods, he couldn’t escape the noise. Someone had cornered
the poor kid again. Logan rose and rolled up the mat he used to meditate.
He stashed it in an old log and followed the angry voice until he could
see who was screaming. Wings was at it again. When he was behind Remy he
popped out of the woods. “ Wings, why don’t you just fast forward this
little speech to the part where you’re perfect and never made a mistake.
I heard this same speech last week, let the kid go in and get some food.”
Warren just stared at the two men, “ come on kid, I was just goin in to
get something to eat myself.” He nudged Remy in the back to get him moving
before Warren could start his attack again. When they had taken a few steps
Logan asked “ what’re ya doin out here ? Thought you were supposed to stay
in bed?” Remy just shrugged, he looked like death just barely warmed over.
He was pale and unsteady on his feet. Still dealing with a severe respiratory
infection. He coughed all night, couldn’t be getting any sleep, the dark
circles under his eyes were proof enough of that. In the three weeks he’d
been back he spent the first in the boathouse. Hank had him in the
lab the second week. A miracle considering that to get the kid to even
enter the lab he was usually unconscious. Another sure sign that he felt
really bad. The only thing that got him released this week was a promise
to stay in his room at the mansion and not escape back to the boathouse.
Logan opened the door that led into the kitchen and pushed Remy into a
chair “ Sit down before ya fall over. When was the last time you ate?”
He was skin and bones, nothing like the strong, confident Cajun who left
here six months ago. So much had happened in those six months, the mission
to space, OZT, that accursed trial, Logan admitting to himself that he
was in love with the Cajun. That one had been building since the kid sauntered
in with Storm four years ago. God, he was something. Tall, thin, looking
like an angel, built like a god with an attitude to match. He drove Cyke
and Wings nuts which made him okay in Logan’s book. They’d shut down quite
a few bars over the years. They had fun, Remy was never afraid to try something
new. The kid in the chair behind him was a shadow of that man. The
fire had gone out in his eyes, all that remained was a scared lonely kid
who was so afraid of being thrown away again the feeling was something
you could almost touch. He just sat there, staring at the floor,
arms wrapped around his waist. He was rocking gently back and forth though
he didn’t seem to be aware of it. Logan sat a plate of food in front of
him and sat down beside him. “Eat” he pointed to the food as he began cleaning
his own plate. Remy looked at the food and swallowed hard. With a shaking
hand he pushed it away. “ Sorry Logan. Feelin kinda sick.” he whispered.
His voice was raspy and Logan knew it had hurt to say those few soft words.
“ Want me to get Hank? You look like hell Remy.” Logan stopped eating to
stare at him. “Non, merci, was just takin a walk. Thought the fresh air
might make me feel better. Wanted some tea.” Logan jumped up, “ I’ll
get it.” He poured some hot water in a mug “ I’m gonna fix you some tea
then I’m gonna walk ya to yer room. I’ve heard them all getting on yer
case. Don’t listen to ’em kid, ain’t one of ’em got the right to say shit.”
Remy just looked at the floor, “ don’ wanna talk ’bout it.” Logan sat the
mug in front of Remy on the table just as Rogue walked into the kitchen.
“ What are you doin down here?” Rogue snapped “ Hank said you’d stay
upstairs.”
“ Sorry Chere…”
“ Don’t you Chere me! You made me leave you behind to die! How could
you do that to me! I thought you loved me!” Logan’s fist’s hitting
the table stopped her ranting. “ Shut the fuck up! Ain’t ya got a mind
of yer own! Can’t ya tell right from wrong?!” “stop …” a soft whisper
“just stop,… she’s right” Tears were threatening to fall down his face.
Remy got up from the table holding a hand out to steady himself and took
off for his room. “ You’re a real bitch girl.” Logan growled as he grabbed
the mug and left to follow Remy. He found him standing in the hall just
outside his room. The door was open, the room in ruins. Remy took the final
shaky steps inside and looked around. He bent and picked up a picture of
himself and his father, shaking broken glass off and pulling it from it’s
broken frame. Clutching it to his chest he sank down on to his bed. “ All
I wanted was a home. A place where, no matter what, I was welcome. A place
to come to when I was tired or scared. Had that with Jean Luc, thought
maybe I found it again with Stormy. Then she came back here, didn’t need
me no more. Guess nobody needs me…nobody wants me.” Logan wanted
so badly to tell him he was wrong. He watched as Remy went to his closet
and pulled out a duffle. Remy slowly sifted through the mess on the floor
and folded a few things into it. “ Well, this is no place I wanna be, not
gonna stay here any more.” He walked back to the bed and put the picture
on top of his belongings and zipped it shut. He sat down wearily on the
edge of the bed “ but where am I gonna go?” Logan entered the room
and sat by him on the bed. He put his arm around Remy’s shoulders and pulled
him close to his side. The kid was a mess, shaking and trying his best
to not fall apart in front of Wolverine. Remy felt warm and Logan wondered
how sick he really was. “ Yer comin with me.” Remy turned his head and
looked into Logan’s eyes. “ Yer sick kid, yer comin to my cabin, no arguments.”
“ Merci, but non. Then they’ll hate you too.” Remy whispered. He lay his
head against Logan’s shoulder and sighed, he hated being like this; weak
and uncertain. He hadn’t felt like this since before Lean Luc took him
in. Logan gave him a little hug and before Remy could stop them, the tears
started again. “ Kid, I gotta know… Did ya tell her to leave ya to die?”
It was a gentle request, not meant to pry, just a friend needing the truth.
“ Oui…Non… felt like I wanted to die. This the closest I got to family
now…And they’d just heard, from my own lips, that I was the cause of the…”
The sentence died, there was no need to finish it. “Of course I wanted
to die! But like ya wanna die if ya just lost yer best friend. When she
dropped me in the snow… told me I didn’t have a home no more…” Logan looked
at him with a frown “ What? She said what?” Remy looked around his trashed
room “ she’s right” Logan exploded at that,“ No She’s Not! She Had
No Right To Say That!” He stopped when he saw Remy flinch back away from
him. “ You never told anybody what she said did you? You just let them
all believe…” Remy whispered “I’m only a thief… never felt like I
was a part of the group…was fun to pretend though…” He pulled away
from Logan and made his way to the door, took one last look at his ruined
belongings and said in a quiet voice “ Merci for givin this thief a chance
to be something more, I’m gonna miss ya Logan.” Then he was gone.
*************************************************
Logan sat on the bed for a while after Remy left. He already knew who
was responsible for the mess, “ damn Ice cube. Wings was here too, probably
cheerin him on.” He got up from the bed and kicked a pile of torn clothes.
Paintings that Logan knew were original works of art were slashed. Any
photo’s that were once proudly displayed were torn into pieces. Logan bent
and picked up one in particular, he had the same photo in his own room.
It was of the whole team, taken by the Professor , on the back, in beautiful
handwriting, there were two words My Friends. “ Some friends…” Logan
muttered.
“Logan? What happened here? YOU didn’t…” Hank McCoy stood in the doorway
surveying the mess. “ No Blue, not me, I smell your boy Ice, Wings was
in on it too. He was harassing the kid outside earlier.” “ Outside? Where
is Remy? He’s not supposed to be wandering around, he’s a step away from
pneumonia.” Logan handed Hank the two halves of the picture “ Well,
his FRIENDS decided it was time for him to go.” “ We have to go after him
Logan, we have to let him know he still has friends here. Along with the
infection he’s also fighting a case of depression. He could do something
stupid and not even realize he’s doing it.” “ We’ll find him. He can stay
at my cabin. No one else will know and you’ll still be close to treat him.”
“ Agreed. Come on Logan, get that nose working. I’m really worried that
this…” he held out his arms at the destroyed room “ could be enough
to push him over the edge.”
The men made their way through the forest of trees that surrounded the
mansion grounds. The scent was faint but Logan tracked Remy until they
came to a clearing. There before them was an old graveyard. “ He’s here
somewhere, his scent’s strong.” Logan scanned the area but saw no sign
of Remy. “ REMY!” Hank called but got no answer. “ Come on
out kid! You know if you don’t I’ll just sniff ya out!” They heard a noise
and Logan’s head snapped sideways “ over there” . They made their way through
weeds and overgrown brush, past the toppled grave markers of forgotten,
faceless people to what had once been a caretakers shed. Once inside they
couldn’t ignore the twin flames that were Remy’s eyes. “ Remy, come out
of there please?” Hank asked calmly. “ I saw what Bobby did to your things…
I’m so sorry.” Behind an overturned table, surrounded by rusty tools and
dead potted plants, Remy sat on the cold stone floor. “I know why he did
it… don’t blame him none…did he have to break my picture of Poppa?” He
just stared at the picture in his hands. “ Henri, my broder, took dis picture
a few weeks before de chargin power kicked in. I remember thinking I guess
dey really DO want me here. It was de first time it really hit me…I had
a Poppa. And Henri was so patient. Played wit me, taught me to read and
write, never got mad…” He stopped talking. Hank and Logan inched their
way back into the corner where he sat. He started coughing and his brow
was covered in beads of sweat. “ Let’s get out of here Remy.” Hank knelt
down beside him and took his chin in his large blue hand.
“ Remy, I promise I’ll stay close, I won’t let anyone bother
you.” Remy coughed again and pulled out of Hank’s hand, “ Non, dis is where
I’m stayin now.” Logan stood behind Hank, “ He’s delirious Hank, let’s
just get him to the cabin.” Remy shook his head,
“ NON , Dis not so bad…stayed in one when I was a kid for a year or
so, til a bigger kid come along and decided it was gonna be his. Beat de
crap outta me…broke my leg…” The fever was doing all the talking now. “
You know how hard it is to steal food wit a broken ankle? Let me tell you…
it’s hard. Den dis old hooker find me and take me to her pimp.” He just
keep talking, the fever saying things that a healthy Remy would never let
himself admit. “ I owed him… he said he had a way for me to pay him back…said
I could practice on him. Couldn’ get it right dough…couldn’ swallow.
Popped me on de ear till it bled…made me do it over and over every day…Different
ways, sometimes my hand… sometimes my mouth…Finally learned how get it
deep in my throat witout choking…” Hank and Logan listened with growing
disgust, Hank fought back the bile that was rising in his throat.
Logan was growling deep in the back of his like a wild animal. “ Den he
taught me oder stuff…didn’ like dat… hurt so bad…made me let oder men teach
me too till I could do it witout cryin…De hooker chased me away one night
after…heard he killed her…” he finally stopped talking and his eyes fluttered
shut. Hank caught him as he slumped sideways and checked his pulse. “ Let’s
get him out of here,” Hank looked around and shivered. He smoothed back
sweaty auburn hair. “ Logan, about what he said…” Logan just sighed
and knelt beside Hank. He caressed Remy’s cheek, “ Don’t think about it
Hank, not now. First we get him settled, then we figure out what to do
about what he told us.” Hank lifted the unconscious boy gently from the
cold floor,
“ Maybe he won’t remember.” He looked at the young man he held
and shuttered.
“ Grab his picture” Hank said as he started back through the forest
toward Logan’s cabin. Logan bent and picked it up, the man in the picture
was holding the small boy close to his side. There was a look of real love
and pride in his eyes, all directed at the boy. He was looking up at the
man, his smile wide and bright. An entire world of hopes and dreams shining
in his crimson and black eyes. “ We gotta talk kid.” Logan whispered to
himself as he hurried to catch up with Hank.
******************************************************
“ Hank? Where’ve you been. Did you see the mess the Cajun left before
he disappeared ?” Hank continued to fill a bag with blankets and medications
as he looked up at Bobby.
“ Yes Robert…I did. How could you? Don’t bother trying to deny it Logan
was in there. What were you thinking? Please Robert, explain to me how
after doing something so childish and cruel, you can live with yourself.”
Bobby stood stunned. “ Come on Hank, It was just Gambit! YOU were there!
YOU’RE one of the ones who left him behind! Don’t try to make it sound
like it’s only me, buddy! Look at what he did to Warren! And what about
Rogue, poor girl. You are just as guilty as me, maybe more so!” Hank
stared at him a moment then collected the things he’d gathered. “ I don’t
have time for this now, but I will be bringing it up at the meeting I have
called for this evening.” He walked up to Bobby and looked
him right in the eye “ I feel like I don’t know you. YES, I was there,
and I did leave him behind. The difference between us Robert, is that I
will regret MY mistake for the rest of my life.” With that he walked
away leaving Bobby to stare at his retreating back.
*****************************************************
Logan watched the kid sleeping in his bed. He brushed back sweaty hair
and caressed a warm cheek, just as he had in the shed. Hank watched silently
for a minute before he entered the small cabin. “ How is he doing?” he
said as Logan relieved him of blankets and a bag. “ What’s all this?”
“ I want to be sure he’s warm enough , the bag contains any medication
I think he will need. The bags I hold contain food that he should have
no problem keeping down and a portable IV. I want him on fluids for a day
or two, he’s not eating and he’s probably dehydrated.” “ Yeah, I
tried to get him to eat earlier but he said he felt sick. He was gonna
have some tea, that’s what he was doin out of his room, but Rogue walked
in and he took off. Found him outside his newly redecorated room.” Hank
nodded, “ I saw Robert before I came here …Logan, was he right? AM I as
bad as them? I was there. I could have made sure he was onboard. I’m a
physician for crying out loud! What was I thinking?!”
“ Now’s not the time Blue. When he’s up to it you’ll have to talk to
the kid, ask him to forgive ya, that’s all we can do.” Logan was watching
Remy and didn’t notice the smile that appeared on his face. “ How long
Logan?” Logan looked up, Hank was looking at him strangely. “ What?” Hank
walked up to him “ how long have you had these feelings for Remy?”
Logan sighed and looked back at Remy, “ Figured it out while he was gone.
It’s killing me to see him like this Blue…How do we get him back?”
“ I’m not sure but I know the first thing we need to do is get him healthy.
I’ve called a team meeting for this evening, so I guess the next thing
will be to set everyone straight about what really happened after the trial.
After that…we try to regain his trust, although I’m not sure we deserve
it after everything that’s happened.”
It took little time for Hank to get the IV hooked up and to inject
medication into it. “ He has full blown pneumonia but the antibiotic will
take care of it. We just need to make sure he gets it and stays warm. I
want him to stay off his feet and rest. When you can’t watch him I will.
At least until his fever breaks. You’re going to have a few weeks alone
with him, it would be the perfect time to tell him how you feel.”
“ Maybe. When he’s in his right mind again.” “ He will be once the
fever breaks. Should we mention the things he said?” Logan shook
his head “ Nah, didn’t sound like something he’d want anybody to know.
I guess if he remembers,…” There was a quiet moan from the bed and Remy’s
eyes flew open , he tried to sit up but fell back against the mattress
when a wave of dizziness and nausea hit him. “ Where am I ?”
Hank walked over and crouched down beside him. “ You’re at Logan’s cabin.”
“Can’ stay here they’ll hate him too.” He tried to rise again but both
Logan and Hank pushed him back down. “ You aren’t going anywhere kid. I’m
gonna take care of you so just lay there okay?” Logan’s voice was gentle,
his touch kind. Remy looked from Logan to Hank, he closed his eyes a moment
then looked at Hank again “ why you bein so nice to me?” Hank squeezed
his shoulder lightly “ because you are my friend Remy. I know after what
happened I don’t deserve to call you that. If you forgive me for being
a part of that mockery of a trial I will be forever grateful.” Remy
was confused “ Forgive you for what?”
Hank whispered “ For not making sure you were on the Blackbird. For not going back the second I realized it.” Remy started coughing again, when he caught his breath he said “ Henri… dere’s nothing to forgive.” Logan sat on the chair by the bed “ Kid, we haven’t been there for ya before, that’s gonna change. From now on we got yer back no matter what.” “ I don’ know what to say…” Logan smiled at him “ just trust us to take care of ya, can ya do that kid?”
“Oui, always did” Hank stood up, “ Logan, could you fix
some of the soup I brought down? See that he eats something. I have to
get going, I called this meeting I guess I should go to it. I will be back
later to check on you Remy.” Logan turned away from Remy “ Give ‘em hell
for me too Blue. I’ll keep him out of trouble while you’re gone.” After
Hank left Logan said “ sit up kiddo, you heard the man you gotta eat some
of this soup.”
He put the tray he carried on the young Cajun’s lap. “ Eat up.” “ Mon
Dieu, Don’ you have smaller bowls?” Remy smiled a little and took a taste
of the broth. “ Logan, can I ask you something?” “Sure kid, here,
I owe ya this mug of tea from earlier.” “ Merci.” he took a sip of the
warm honey tea. It felt so good on his sore throat. “ Before… did I… was
I dreamin or did I talk about…did I tell you…” he couldn’t seem to get
the question out but Logan knew what he was trying to ask. “ Yeah kid,
you told us. Don’t worry though, Blue and I know how to keep our mouths
shut.” Remy let the spoon he held drop to the bowl and stared into
the soup. “ Kid?” “ Now you know… not only am I a traitor,
I’m a whore too.” “ No Remy. You were abused. It’s a damn shame and
there aren’t any pretty words that are gonna make it better or make it
go away. You were raped.”
“ I owed…”
“ Owed Nothing! That pervert raped ya then sold ya like trash, You’re
Not Trash Remy. You were a victim.” Remy couldn’t look at Logan,
he felt tired and sick and now he was so ashamed. He let his hair
fall in front of his face. Logan recognized the tactic, the kid couldn’t
move so he was trying to hide in plain sight. “ Why don’t you go
back to sleep if you aren’t gonna eat any more.” Remy just nodded and hid
under the covers. “ Night Logan.” he whispered “ Night kiddo.” Logan returned.
He listened until Remy’s breaths became deep and slow, Good, finally the
kid would get the rest he needed. Logan pulled the cover up a bit higher
and let his hand run down Remy’s arm on top of the blanket. He sat back
and watched Remy sleep. He had loved him for what felt like forever now,
couldn’t imagine not loving him. Did knowing about Remy’s horrid past change
that? Nope, in fact it made the need to hold and protect the young thief
even more urgent. It was time to stop being a coward and admit his feelings,
then he’d know if he even had a chance with the kid. Logan got comfortable
in the chair beside the bed and drifted off, Remy’s confession replaying
in his mind…He’d fantasized about Remy doing all the things he mentioned
to him. Not Abuse. Not Rape. Remy loving him as much as he loved Remy.
Burying himself deep inside the perfect Cajun body…Or Remy taking him so
deep in his throat that his nose was buried in the thick dark curls that
surrounded Logan’s cock. That soft silky curtain of auburn hair spilling
across his thighs…Then Remy’d hollow his cheeks and suck…Logan’s hand moved
to rub the front of his jeans. He leaned back and spread his legs a bit.
It would be sooo goood. Logan would lay the boy out on the bed like a feast.
Kiss every inch of the soft pale skin. Run his fingers through the silky
hair. Let those heavenly eyes set him on fire and burn him up. He didn’t
even realize when he opened his jeans, pushing them down so he could stroke
his painfully hard cock slowly…so slowly… Oh he’d be so good to the boy…he’d
kiss and lick and worship Remy until he was begging. Then he’d massage
and rub and stretch him, slow and easy. There would be no pain, just the
joining of bodies and hearts and souls until they became one… He
was stroking fast and hard now, nostrils flaring as he panted and growled…
“Logan?”
The orgasm hit him then and he just got a glimpse of Remy falling out
of bed to curl up in the corner when he had to slam his eyes shut. Remy
was scared. Scared of him.
He couldn’t move, couldn’t talk yet, the orgasm held him captive. Remy
was sobbing, saying over and over “ non, non…please don’ hurt me…please…”
Logan could finally move, think, breathe… “ Fuck” he looked at
his hand and wiped it on his jeans then pulled them up. “ Logan? Remy?
What’s going on here?” Hank took in Logan’s appearance and Remy’s huddled
form and roared “ NO! YOU WILL NOT HARM THIS BOY!” He placed himself
between a dazed Logan and a sobbing Remy.
“ God no Hank, I didn’t hurt him, I would never hurt him, I love him,
I love you Remy.” Logan was rambling, saying anything and everything. What
the Hell had he done! He pulled up his zipper. Hank had his arm around
the shaking Cajun. Both men were silent and watching Logan as he repeated
over and over “ I love you Remy, I’ve loved you forever I’ll never hurt
you, never.” He was on his knees in front of them now. Not reaching with
his hands but with his heart and soul. He never prayed, wasn’t sure he
believed in a Higher Being, but he’d do anything, say any prayer to fix
this. It was all in his teary blue eyes.
Remy untangled himself from Hank and crawled toward Logan. Slowly,
with a shaking hand he touched Logan’s face. “ You love me?” He sounded
so surprised, like what Logan said was the most incredible thing he’d ever
heard. “ Yeah Rem, I do. Have since as long as I can remember. Took losing
you to make me realize it. I love you kiddo.” He stopped talking, just
stared into those magical eyes, willed himself to be still. Remy’s hand
was still on his cheek, he was sooo close. “ God Remy, I was thinking about
how damn much I wanna touch you, worship your body. I wanna make everything
okay, take that haunted, hunted, look out of you beautiful eyes.” He slowly
raised his hand and carefully brushed back soft curls behind Remy’s ear
allowing himself the reward of running his fingertips down his long graceful
neck. Then he carefully ran his thumb across long soft lashes. Hank cleared
his throat “ Remy, you’ve pulled out the IV, I need you to get back in
bed so I can clean the wound and reattach it.” Remy didn’t reply, his eyes
never left Logan’s , his thumb was stroking Logan’s rough cheek. His other
hand slowly rose and started the same treatment on the other cheek. He
slowly leaned in and claimed Logan’s mouth. Soft, gentle kisses at first
then Logan’s eyes drifted shut and his arms wrapped around his prize and
pulled him close deepening the kiss. Both men moaned and their grip became
like a lifeline. They stayed that way for what felt like forever before
Hank put his hands under Remy’s arms and started gently lifting him from
the floor. “ Come on.” he said softly. Remy and Logan seemed to be in a
trance, only aware of each other. Even as Hank forcibly returned Remy to
bed Logan followed, never losing eye contact. Hank smiled and shook his
head as he cleaned Remy’s arm and reattached the IV. “ Logan, Remy, I am
going to leave now. It seems you two need some privacy to talk.” Remy was
shaken from his trance by his voice, “ Oui Henri, t’anks.” Logan looked
up at Hank
“ Blue,…I’m… I won’t hurt him.” He looked back at Remy and smiled,
smoothing back his hair. “ I know that now Logan. There is no where on
earth that could be safer.” Hank patted Logan’s shoulder, “ I’ll be back
in the morning unless you need me during the night. I promise to knock.”
He laughed as he left. The cabin was silent, Remy played with a thread
on the blanket, Logan stared down at his own hands. They both decided to
speak at once “ I’m Sorry.” They smiled at each other then Remy started
again “ Logan…I didn’t mean it, I know you woudn’ hurt me… but when I woke
up and saw you, my mind saw someone else… a lot of someone else’s. I…I
still have nightmares…can’ forget.”
“ Kid…Remy. I… I’ve had fantasies…dreams about you doin’ …I didn’t
know about your past! I’d never make ya do ANYTHING that scared or upset
ya!” Remy was quiet, staring at his lap. “ Talk to me kid.” Logan lifted
Remy’s chin until he was looking into his eyes. Remy sighed, trying to
organize his thoughts. He still had a fever and the meds Hank gave him
made his mind feel all fuzzy and unorganized. “ Can’ think straight so
I’m just gonna talk.” He took Logan’s hand and rubbed the calluses with
his soft thieves fingers.
“ Don’ interrupt okay?” He looked into Logan’s eyes until the
older man nodded. “ the… the things I tol’ you happened when I was maybe
seven years old. I don’ know for sure cause I don’ even know when I was
born…I’m… I’m afraid to let you love me.” His voice was so soft anyone
other than Logan would have to strain to hear him. “ Not cause I don’ like
you…had my own fantasies about you…” Logan’s head snapped up at that. “
You gotta understand… Always knew I was Bi… wheder it was my fucked up
childhood or just natural I don’ know…Logan, men have…hurt me…” he hurried
to add “ I’m not afraid of you, …I’m afraid of de memories. I never know
when they’re gonna be triggered. Can’ be touched after… not even Jean Luc
could get close. I don’ wanna hurt ya Cher… don’ want ya thinking it’s
you…Maybe we shouldn’ even try… I’m not GOOD enough for you…” A tear made
it’s way down his cheek. Logan reached out with a finger and caught it.
“ You done?” Remy nodded “ No interrupting” another nod.
“ Can’t say exactly when I fell in love with ya. It coulda been
when Storm dragged you home. It coulda been one of the hundreds of times
you saved my neck. It coulda been when ya beat me at cards with nothing
but a pair of two’s and a smile.” Remy looked at him with a tiny smile
remembering that particular hand, Logan had four tens. “ I wanna take you
in my arms and never let you go. I wanna kiss you breathless. I wanna get
lost in those fiery eyes. I wanna go to sleep with you in my arms and wake
up wrapped in yours. I wanna feel your heart next to mine. I wanna tell
you I love you until there’s not a doubt in your mind it’s true. I wanna
make you feel so good. I wanna be the reason you smile. I wanna hear you
sing.” Logan knew he was rambling but he’d had these feelings hidden inside
him for so long and it felt so good to finally be able to say them out
loud. “ God Remy, please let me love you, please. I want it so bad it hurts.
Let me show you what love really means. Let me show you how good we can
be. You’ll never regret it I swear. You’ll NEVER be lonely and you’ll NEVER
be scared cause as long as I breathe I’m gonna love you.” He was leaning
towards Remy, rubbing his arms, trying not to beg. He would he decided,
if begging would get him another kiss, another caress, another chance to
hold what he long ago decided was an angel. He laced his fingers with Remy’s
and closed his eyes. Something that died long ago with Mariko was reborn
with this chance to love Remy. Remy saw the raw love shining in Logan’s
eyes when he opened them. Never had such a look been turned his way. Never
had such peace descended on his soul. He licked his lips and took a leap
of faith. “ Oui Logan, Oui…love me.” And with those words Logan’s
heart took flight.
End?
*Notes*
Bobby wanted to be the bad guy at the start of this. He wanted to do
some really horrible things to Remy but I only let him trash his room.
Now he’s begging for a chance to apologize so I may have to let him if
he keeps screaming in my head.
Hank wanted to join The Boys this time! All that wonderful blue fur
is just going to waste.J I bet he purrs if you rub him juuust right. (sigh)
That may have to be another story…